Muppet Fan-Fic: Don't Trip the Driver

[The Count]

No! You can't stop it there! We want more, and deserve more, and could you post more please?
The braveness of that lead frog... The fact that you ended up with one happy pig shows that you didn't deserve that bad grade in Math, but those two deserved the karate chops they got... At least Pepe did.
Oh, I'm so enraptured by Uncle Deadly reaching the MBH and immediately feeling at home when intruding through the kitchen. Too bad his lightning effect can't be used too often and at least maybe he'll have some allies in the form of the Grosse family arriving there as well...

But the one thing I abso'blooming-lutely hug about this chapter?
The room! And the Ghostly Trio! No, not those three spirit saps... Jim, and Jerry, and Richard!
Oh, that was the best thing ever. Loved the humor there... How Richard finally got Marilyn to say "Yes" to go dancing with him... And the whole "Your Face!" and how Jim deflected it... But even better, they're reclaiming their own sanctum sanctorium, cleaning away the vandalism perpetrated by that Vanderghast. And the line I liked the most was when Jim felt good after seeing Jerry Nelson's face again. It sort of harkens to the character over whom this is all about, Uncle Deadly and the fact he's no longer a spook and the threat of the theater being taken away, which is why it was doubly as great that it was Richard who found Jerry's painting as Scooter's family's at the heart of this story.

Oh Prawn! Hugs to you buddy, and get back to post more soonerishkibbible!

 

[TogetherAgain]

Prawnie my beloved other half this chapter ROCKS but at the moment I'm not online, I don't have my computer on, so it's physically impossible for me to be making this post so I'll tell you how wonderful you are once my room is clean!

 

[redBoobergurl]

Jim, Richard and Jerry!!! How fun are they??? I have to say, the way you were writing for them is exactly how I picture them up in heaven. Screwing around, having fun together. That's how it should be! I loved Richard's line about going dancing with Marilyn Monroe too. Very cute. The rest of the chapter was great too, but that was my favorite part! More please!

 

[theprawncracker]

Chapter 23

The lights in the theater flickered on, and the dust sitting above the stage could be seen clearly now. Benny jumped from the light control box down to the seating area. He used the scythe as a walking stick as he trudged back up to the stage.

The theater looked a lot different from the stage, especially when the lights were on. Benny leered out at where a crowd would sit, a crowd that would come to watch him.

There in lied the problem however, Benny didn’t know how to perform in front of a crowd. As a matter of fact, he’d never even performed on stage.

He supposed now would be as good a time as any to at least try and perform, even if there wasn’t an audience. He didn’t know how much having an audience would affect his performance, he could barely see out into the crowd anyway.

Benny began to tap his feet lightly, digging inside for a song he actually knew. It was harder than he thought it would be.

He muttered something under his breath, nothing was coming to him. He hummed a bit of a tune he was making up, now if only he could put words to the music. "Da da dum... La da doo... Da da da dee..."

"If the world is so good..." he began slowly.
"Then why am I bad
If the world’s so perfect
Then why am I sad..."

"If the world was different
Well, then you would see
That the world wants everyone
Everyone but me.

"Why should I change
For this world
This world that won’t change for me
Why should I change
When the world won’t change
Won’t change for me."

Benny began to stomp around the stage, scythe in his grasp. He reached down on the stage and grabbed up the curtain he pulled down earlier, throwing it around his back like a cape.

"If I ruled the world
Boy, would things change
Everyone would be normal
No one weird or strange

"We’d all be accepted
For who we truly are
Cause everyone would be the same
No one would be a star."

Benny started firing blazes from the head of the scythe as he sang the chorus, shooting flames all around the stage.

"Why should I change
For this world
This world that won’t change for me
Why should I change
When the world won’t change
Won’t change for me."

Benny cackled loudly, pushing back his silvery slivers of hair that dangled off his head. "I’m really a rather sweet fellow, once you get to know me! HA!" he cackled.

"The world is cruel
So is life
Why should the after life
Be. Any. Different?!"

Benny cackled out the last note. "The audience loves me!" he shouted. "And so does this scythe!" he pointed she scythe up towards the ceiling, firing another blast of heat.

The fire ball knocked out a light up on the ceiling. Benny muttered. "I’ll fix it..."

Suddenly, he heard a ringing noise. "Ugh, what is it now Polly?" he muttered.

He reached into his pocket and flipped open is cell phone. "What?" he answered. "...Marvelous, I’ll meet you at the rendevous point. ...Yeah, give them the frog and bear once you have the keys. ...Great." Benny hung up and laughed again. "Time to lock up."

<X>X<X>

​

"I don’t care why you honked the horn! I was carrying my uncle inside when you did it!" Scooter shouted, stepping into the Boarding House.

"Heh, heh, even J.P. thought it was funny, right J.P.?" Clifford asked J.P., whom Scooter was carrying.

"Mehmer flemmer..." he mumbled.

"See?"

"Uncle Deadly?!" Skeeter screamed.

"Yeah, I see- UNCLE DEADLY?!"

The three of them looked up and realized they were staring the phantom right in his beady yellow eyes.

"Thank goodness it’s you," Deadly breathed out heavily.

"Who else would it be, dude?" Clifford asked. "And what’re you doin’ here?"

"He’s hiding from Vandergast, that’s what he’s doing," Scooter said.

"Naw, he’s Uncle D., he doesn’t need to hide," Clifford said.

"Sure he does! Especially when Vandergast has that... Blade thing!" Scooter shouted.

"Please, let me explain," Deadly whispered.

"Go on Uncle Deadly," Skeeter smacked Clifford and Scooter on the back of their heads. "We’re listening."

Deadly clenched his arm. "May I sit down?" he asked.

"Dude, this is like your home, make yourself at home," Clifford said.

"Thank you." Deadly and the others moved into the living room. Scooter gently set J.P. in one of the armchairs. Skeeter, Clifford, and Uncle Deadly took seats on the couch.

"What happened to your uncle?" Deadly asked.

"Some sort of truth serum," Scooter whispered. "But it did more than make him tell the truth, you can barely feel his pulse..."

Deadly nodded. "Benny will do anything..." Deadly whispered.

"Whadayou know about this Vandgergast dude?" Clifford asked the phantom.
"Not much," Deadly said. "Just that he avoided Death many years ago, which caused Death to disappear. That’s how Benny got the scythe."

"‘Kay, ya lost me at Death," Clifford remarked.

Deadly sighed. "Then I have a lot of explaining to do..."

Deadly went on to describe the rules of Death and the role he played in them. He told of Death’s position, and what had happened to him. And finally, he told of J.P.’s situation.

"Your uncle came to me just recently with this news... He has known of Vandergast for years, but just recently alerted me of the threat."

J.P. squirmed slightly in the armchair. "Of course, there was nothing I could do by the time I was alerted. Perhaps, if I was alerted sooner, I could have told Death and something could have been done. But now..." Deadly sighed.

"We’ll figure something out," Skeeter said. "We always do."

"Yeah, there’s gotta be something we can do," Clifford agreed.

Deadly shook his head. "There is nothing, not so long as Vandergast is in the theater."

"Sure there is!" Scooter finally spoke up. "Uncle Deadly, you know that theater better than anyone! There’s gotta be away to get inside and get that scythe back!" Scooter was standing by this point. "And I’m willing to do whatever it takes to save the theater!"

"Me too!" Clifford stood up as well.

"Count me in," Skeeter said.

Deadly grinned. "Well then, step one is already complete."

>X<X>X<
​

"Alright boys, you know the plan," Polly told his pirate crew.

Robin cowered behind Fozzie, who was being restrained by Angel Marie.

"Um, please watch the fur," Fozzie told Angel Marie. "I just had it dry cleaned."

Kermit stepped towards Polly. "Polly, why’re you doing this? You’re a Muppet!" Kermit said to the lobster.

"Oh, yeah? Am I frog?" Polly asked. "Den why haven’t I been on screen since ‘Muppet Treasure Island’?!" Polly shouted.

Kermit gulped. "Uh, union?"

"Not a good answer, frog," Polly glared. "Now give us the keys! Or the bear gets it!"

"Why the bear?" Fozzie whined. "Why is it always the bear?"

"Quiet you," Clueless pointed at Fozzie. "No, no, I’m just kidding, you can keep talking."

"Shut up Clueless!" Polly shouted. "So frog, where are the keys?"

"Uncle Kermit!" Robin shouted.

Kermit sighed. "Here," Kermit handed a set of keys to Polly.

"Ooh, how did you do that?" Clueless asked. "You don’t even have any pockets even!"

"I said shut it, Clueless!" Polly yelled again.

"I’ve been shut for ages," Old Tom said.

Kermit scrunched up his face. "Can I have my best friend and my nephew back now?" Kermit asked.

"Is that all the keys?" Polly asked, shaking Kermit’s keys.

Kermit sighed. "Hold on..."

Kermit hopped back to the bus and walked on. "Alright guys, everyone who has a key to the theater, throw it up."

The sound of jingling keys filled the bus as everyone threw a key up, landing at Kermit’s feet.

Everyone but Miss Piggy.

"Hey, hey, whoa, what?!" Piggy shouted. "How many of you have a key?"

Everyone on the bus raised their hand, even Mrs. Bear.

"WHAT?!" Piggy shouted.

Kermit quickly rounded up all the keys and ran back out the bus. "Here you go," Kermit extended his hands out to Polly. "All twenty-four copies of the key to the Muppet Theater."

"Um, Kermit, should I give the crawdad mine too?" Fozzie asked.

"I’m a lobster! And yes, you should, or you get it!" Polly shouted.

"I still don’t know what it is," Fozzie whined. "But I don’t like it!" He handed Polly his key.

"What about you Roland, you got a key too?" Polly asked Robin.

Robin nodded silently and handed Polly a key.

"Thank you!" Polly quickly grabbed up the key.

"Can I have them back now, please?" Kermit asked.

"Well dat’s a Sesame seed for ya, always sayin’ please," Polly laughed. "Alright Angel Marie, let ‘em go."

Angel Marie released Fozzie from his grasp. "OH THANK YOU!" Fozzie shouted, running to cower behind his best friend the frog, along with Robin.

"Bye," Angel Marie waved. "Come back anytime!"

"I think we’re done here," Polly said, walking back to his motorcycle, putting the keys in his jacket pocket.

"Wait a second," Kermit called. "Where’s Sweetums?"

"I left my sweetums at home," Clueless blinked. "She hates road trips."

"The monster who chased you!" Kermit said.

"Oh, him?" Polly asked. "Yeah, we lost him way back there. Good luck findin’ him though."

The pirates laughed and revved up their bikes. As they pulled back out onto the highway smoke filled the air. Kermit picked up his nephew and carried him back into the bus, Fozzie followed.

"Mrs. Bear, we have a monster and a whatever to find." Kermit handed Robin to Rowlf and took command.

"But Kermit," Rowlf said. "What about the keys?"

"We can’t let the bad guys win!" Fozzie said.

"Yeah man, the whole story would be a bummer if that happened!" Floyd shouted.

Kermit shook his head. "Gonzo and Sweetums are more important."

"Kermin, once, jou said to me ‘But what about our dream, Pepe?’ and do jou know what I said? I said to jou ‘She’s hot, hokay?’ Which she was, but, neither Gonso, or Sweetyums are hot, hokay? So why are we giving up our dreams for dem again?" Pepe asked.

"Because Pepe," Kermit began. "The dream wouldn’t be the same without them."

"The frog has a point," Johnny said.

"The frog definitely has a point!" Sal shouted.

"So whadaya say? Let’s go find our friends!" Kermit shouted.

<X>X<X>

​

Sweetums stood in the middle of the highway and looked around. "Aw man! Now I’ve gotta catch up to those guys! Again!"

On the side of the road, a penguin with a stack of cue cards quacked at the monster. "Where’re you going exactly?" the penguin asked.

"To find my bus," Sweetums said. "Hey... Don’t I know you from somewhere?"

"Well sure, I’m in every one of these stories!" the penguin said, holding up a cue card that read "Applause."

Sweetums scratched his head. "Uh..."

"Well why aren’t you clapping?! When the card is up, you do what it says! Sheesh!" the penguin shouted.

"Well, I know but-"

"Just clap!" Sweetums started clapping hard for the penguin. "That’ll be five bucks," the penguin said. "If you need to write a check, you can make it out to ‘Zany L. Penguin’."

Sweetums stared down at Zany. "How ‘bout an I.O.U.?" Sweetums asked.

"Are you insured?" Zany asked.

"Are you?" Sweetums kicked Zany off the road and into the woods. "Dang runnin’ gags..." Sweetums muttered. "Speakin’ of which..." Sweetums started running down the highway again, after the bus.

 

[redBoobergurl]

Oh the hilarity! "How many of you have keys?" and everyone raising their hands including Mrs. Bear! That was just so funny! Reminds me of how everyone has a key to Monica's apartment in the show Friends. And the line about Kermit being a Sesame seed always saying please really cracked me up too. Many moments in this chapter actually cracked me up quite a bit, but sadly I don't have time to comment on them all. So, I'll just say what I always do: great stuff, more please!

 

[The Count]

*Pokes Prawny. You there? Can we please get more of this story? Come on, before Lisa gets online and has a chance to catch up with more of whatever story she decides to update.
*Notices Lisa coming into the room. Oh hey girl... Was talking about you. Want some hot chocolate? And could you please update a fic or two of yours? Huh? Nah, I think Prawny's unconscious again.

 

[theprawncracker]

Chapter 24

The Electric Mayhem bus wasn’t always the most pristine vehicle to drive, but it always got the Muppets where they needed to go.

Until today, when the tire was flat, and Kermit, Fozzie, Floyd, Rizzo, and Animal stared at the burst rubber with annoyance.

"Man, how could this have happened?" Floyd asked.

"Beats me," Rizzo shrugged.

"BEAT RAT! BEAT RAT!" Animal leaped at Rizzo.

Floyd held tight to the chain. "Down Animal! Back! Sit! Heel!"

"Kermit?" Fozzie looked to his best friend for counsel.

Kermit stared down at the sliced tire. "Floyd?" Kermit asked the hipster.
"Yeah, green stuff?" Floyd asked.

"Is there a spare tire underneath the bus?"

"Should be, yeah, think we actually wrote a song about it on one of our road trips," Floyd nodded.

"Road trip! Road trip!" Animal said.

"Alright Fozzie, bust out the straws," Kermit told the bear.

Fozzie pulled out a group of drinking straws and walked back on the bus with Kermit and the others. "Alright gang," Kermit addressed the group. "We’ve got a flat, so here’s the deal, everyone draws a straw, and whoever gets the shortest has to change the tire, alright?"

"Uncle Kermit?" Robin tugged at his uncle. "Do I have to draw a straw?"
Kermit patted his nephew’s head. "No Robin, don’t worry about it."

"Oh, Kermie," Piggy spoke up sweetly. "Does moi have to draw a straw? Vous wouldn’t want moi to ruin moi’s new manicure and pedicure combo, would vous?"

Kermit scrunched up his face. "Piggy, just draw a straw."

Piggy did as she was told, as did the rest of the Muppets, paws, wings, and hands all reached in for a grab at the plastic sticks deciding their fate.

"Alright, c’mon, who got de short one?" Pepe asked. "De suspense es killing me, hokay?"

"Wasn’t me."

"Man, mine’s longer than Piggy’s, does that count for anything?"

"Yeah? Well mine’s longer than Clyde’s! So there!"

"I think me and Butch have the same size."

"My strev is nut shurtur thun zee cheeckens."

"My straw isn’t, Beaker?"

"Mee mee mo mee me maw."

"Waiting like dis, sucks, hokay?"

"Ahh! Sucks, straws! That’s fun-ny!"

"Um, excuse me my good primate," Sam whispered to Sal. "What is the object of this?"

"To not get a short straw," Sal said. "Why?"

"Because my straw is significantly shorter than yours." Sam held out his straw stub to Sal.

"SAM GOT THE SHORT STRAW!" Sal shouted for all the bus to hear.

Pepe and Rizzo began laughing. "Hey, good luck d’er Sam," Rizzo said.

"I hope you’re not too tired to fix it! Ahh! Wocka! Wocka!"

Sam frowned, well, he was always frowning, so he frowned some more. "Kermit, this is completely outrageous!"

"Sorry Sam," Kermit said. "Those were the rules."

"Yeah man," Floyd laughed. "The spare tire’s under the bus! Good luck! Ha ha ha!"

With that, Sam left his seat and made his way to the door. He stopped, turned around and pointed forward. "I would just like to say, that as a strong, decent, American citizen, I am proud to serve my country in such a way as changing a tire. And furthermore-"

"Sam?" Rowlf stopped the eagle.

"Yes, o’ pooch of pilfered patriotism?"

"Just go change the tire."

"Oh! Indeed!" Sam saluted and marched off the bus, around to the tire. The eagle cross-examined the tire. Kermit, Fozzie, and the rest of the Muppets stuck their head out the windows. "Kermit?" Sam asked the frog.

"Yes, Sam?" Kermit replied.

"The tire is most definitely flat."

Kermit scrunched up his face. "Thank you Sam, but we already knew that. Now could you start fixing it?"

"Oh, of course!" Sam said. "Now where is that spare tire?"

"Underneath the bus!" all of the Muppets shouted at once.

"Good heavens," Sam said. "You expect me to mangle my feathers by getting down on the road, crawling under this bus, and pulling out a tire?"

"You’ll probably have to pull out the bus jack too," Floyd said.

"I thought Sweetums was Jack," Sal said.

"Jack’s not his name," Robin replied. "Jack’s his job."

"Jack! Oh what a cute job!" Bean said. "I wish my job was named Jack."

"I wish our jack would get on the job!" Piggy growled.

"Yeah me too, I’m hungry," Rizzo said.

"And Gonzo and Sweetums are still stuck on the road somewhere!" Fozzie shouted.

"Oh yeah."

Suddenly, down the road, the Muppets heard a car approaching with music from the twenties playing on the radio.

"Uncle Kermit! It’s a car! Maybe they can help!" Robin said.

"Good idea," Kermit told his nephew. "Sam, flag down the car."

"Oh! Of course!" Sam whipped out an American flag and waved it in front of him.

The approaching Jeep slowed to a stop, the twenties music still playing, and the two old men inside still as mean and as old as ever.

"Hey Waldorf, look! It’s the Muppets!" Statler said from the driver’s seat.
Statler and Waldorf looked at the Muppets and laughed.

"Statler? Waldorf?" Fozzie asked. "Oh no, even when I’m on vacation they find me..."

"You’re on vacation?" Statler asked.

"So are we!" Waldorf declared.

"From your awful show!"

"Do ho ho ho!"

"Ah!" Sam shouted, looking at the back of their Jeep. "I see you have a spare tire that is easy to access!"

"Yeah, and I see you have a brain that isn’t often accessed!"

"Do ho ho ho!"

"Well may I borrow your tire?" Sam asked.

"May we ditch your show for good and retire to Florida?" Statler asked.

"No!" Fozzie shouted.

"Well then, good luck changing your tire!"

"Do ho ho ho!" both hecklers laughed as they drove their Jeep away.

"Fozzie..." Kermit stared at his best friend. "Why did you do that? We could’ve gotten our tire and be freed from those old curmudgeons!"

"Sorry, Kermit," Fozzie wrung his hat in his hands. "But those two are the only things that make my act funny!"

"Good grief..." Kermit sighed.

<X>X<X>

​

Clifford’s car pulled up in front of the theater. Uncle Deadly hadn’t been in a car since before his death, and back then it was mostly common for him to walk, it was a surreal experience.

Clifford, Scooter, Skeeter, and Uncle Deadly got out of the car and stared at the theater. "Well, here we go," Skeeter whispered.

"All we’ve worked for," Scooter said. "All our hopes, and our dreams, all of them lie in this theater."

"And you’re uncle’s lyin’ in the car," Clifford said.

"Yes," Uncle Deadly said. "He’ll be safest there."

Scooter and Skeeter nodded. Clifford stuffed his hands in his pockets. "What’s he gonna do to us Uncle D.? You know, if we get caught."

Uncle Deadly sighed. The phantom stared up at the theater he called home, then back down at the three people he called family. "Just don’t get caught," Deadly said.

Scooter gulped. Skeeter slipped her arm through Clifford’s. "We can do it," Clifford said. "If anyone can, we can."

Deadly nodded. "If anything goes wrong, anything at all, I want you three out of there."

"No promises," Clifford said. "We’re family dude, we stick together."

"Especially when Bunsen’s canister of Muppet Labs Super Adhesive bursts," Scooter smiled.

"Now that was a sticky situation," Uncle Deadly grinned.

"Ready?" Clifford asked.

The three others nodded. "Well then," Uncle Deadly said. "Let’s split up gang."

 

[The Count]

Fabulous. Though I know this is reaching the climax and nearing the end after you gave Benny his master villain musical number a bit back. Tired for reviews, see ya later.

 

[redBoobergurl]

The scene with the straws was just hilarity at it's best! Sam trying to change a flat? Oh the images that I can see with that! Too funny! And then Statler and Waldorf showing up! It was just perfect! Great stuff as usual Prawnie, thanks for giving me something to read at work!

 

[TogetherAgain]

All right, Prawn Dust. One more word about how I have to catch up on my other half's reviews and I think I'll burst. Hallelujah, I'm allowed to be on the computer now, so here goes.

Chapter Twenty-Two

The three of them stopped working suddenly, realizing they were done, and stared at all their friends, co-workers, and some people they didn't even know. "Oh yeah," Richard whispered. "That's why."

Yes, Richard. That's why.

"Hey, hey Pepe!" Clyde shouted to Beauregard.

"I'm not Pepe, I'm Beauregard," Beau said.

"That's not what Pepe told me!" Butch said.

"Oh really?" Beau asked. "Well then I guess I am Pepe."

"Si, si, and I am Beauregard. Keep it dat way for a minute, hokay?" Pepe darted past the janitor.

I know what you're referencing! La de da de da dum! I know! Haha!

Rowlf looked anxiously at Kermit. The frog shrugged. "I think he deserved that one," he said.

AGREED! On multiple levels.

"Did he deserve that one?" Rowlf asked.

Kermit shrugged again. "Probably."

AGREED AGAIN! On the same multiple levels.

Chapter Twenty-Three

The theater looked a lot different from the stage, especially when the lights were on.

IT DOES! It really truly does! Believe me, I've been on stage, with the lights on, and BOY is it different! And when the stage lights are on and the house lights are off and you can't even see the audience but you KNOW they're there it's OOOOOOOOOH! ...Okay, sorry, I'll stop dreaming of the few school plays I managed to get a part in.

Benny began to tap his feet lightly, digging inside for a song he actually knew. It was harder than he thought it would be.

It is! It can be! See Benny, you should leave it to the experts. Give the Muppets their theater back. ...Wishful thinking, huh?

Benny cackled loudly, pushing back his silvery slivers of hair that dangled off his head. "I’m really a rather sweet fellow, once you get to know me! HA!" he cackled.

GAH! Oh I shivered through his whole number Prawnie, I really did! And the silvery slivers, I LOVE that! That's PERFECT! But that line there is just OOOOOH I shiver and shudder and squirm!

Benny cackled out the last note. "The audience loves me!" he shouted. "And so does this scythe!" he pointed she scythe up towards the ceiling, firing another blast of heat.

Did I mention that I shivered through his entire song? Because I really really did. And I don't mean because my fan was on too high again. In fact I think it was pretty warm in my room when I read it. But I digress. Creepy stuff.

"‘Kay, ya lost me at Death," Clifford remarked.

I just plain love that line. No real good reason. I just do.

Deadly grinned. "Well then, step one is already complete."

<Cheers!> Yayful! I like that step one. Can we do that again? ...No? We have to do step two? Oh, okay...

"Um, please watch the fur," Fozzie told Angel Marie. "I just had it dry cleaned."

THE MUPPET MOVIE! ...Or at least it reminds me of it. Anyway, AWESOME!

Kermit gulped. "Uh, union?"

Si, si, de same union dat moved de bush in Muppets From Space, hokay? Or is it de one dat held de umbrella? (Hey, jour de one who got me talking like Pepe, hokay? Don't blame me for posting in es.)

"Why the bear?" Fozzie whined. "Why is it always the bear?"

How should hi know, hokay? Hi only have thirty-four of de bears. OH, jou mean de bear as in jou. Hokay.

"Quiet you," Clueless pointed at Fozzie. "No, no, I’m just kidding, you can keep talking."

You write Clueless SO WELL! Have I said that yet? Has anyone said that yet? It needs to be said. You are AWESOME at Clueless! Honestly! Really! Truly! SOOOOOOOOO awesome!

"I still don’t know what it is," Fozzie whined. "But I don’t like it!"

And Fozzie! SO good at Fozzie! I can hear and see this line, really, I can. SO awesome.

"What about you Roland, you got a key too?"

I love that Polly can't get Robin's name right! It reminds me of Finding Nemo. "His son Bingo..."

"We can’t let the bad guys win!" Fozzie said.

GREAT MUPPET CAPER! TOTALLY! OH I HEART YOU! I LESS THAN THREE YOU! ...Did I REALLY just say that? ...Feel free to knix the part about less-than three. ( <3 )

Kermit shook his head. "Gonzo and Sweetums are more important."

"Kermin, once, jou said to me ‘But what about our dream, Pepe?’ and do jou know what I said? I said to jou ‘She’s hot, hokay?’ Which she was, but, neither Gonso, or Sweetyums are hot, hokay? So why are we giving up our dreams for dem again?" Pepe asked.

"Because Pepe," Kermit began. "The dream wouldn’t be the same without them."

SO much to love! First off, Kermit's line that Gonzo and Sweetums are more important. SO TRUE! Of course, the family first! Crazy mismatched family they may be, but family none the less! Second off, Pepe's line! IAVMMCM! (I just love spouting that acronym...) SEHR SEHR FANTASTISCH, MEIN LIEBES PRAWN! ...Erm, which is roughly, "Very very fantastic, my dear Prawn." Except in German, with semi-butchered grammar. Third off- A STANDING OVATION FOR KERMIT'S LINE! THE DREAM WOULDN'T BE THE SAME WITHOUT THEM! I APPLAUD!

"So whadaya say? Let’s go find our friends!" Kermit shouted.

YEAH! LET'S GO! <jumps>

"Are you?" Sweetums kicked Zany off the road and into the woods. "Dang runnin’ gags..." Sweetums muttered. "Speakin’ of which..." Sweetums started running down the highway again, after the bus.

Speaking of applause. This scene is just hilarious. I love it. Love seeing Sweetums running again.

Chapter Twenty-Four

"BEAT RAT! BEAT RAT!" Animal leaped at Rizzo.

No! Don't beat the rat! ...He's a Steve character...

"Uncle Kermit?" Robin tugged at his uncle. "Do I have to draw a straw?"
Kermit patted his nephew’s head. "No Robin, don’t worry about it."

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, so sweet!

"Oh, Kermie," Piggy spoke up sweetly. "Does moi have to draw a straw? Vous wouldn’t want moi to ruin moi’s new manicure and pedicure combo, would vous?"

Kermit scrunched up his face. "Piggy, just draw a straw."

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, so practical!

Piggy did as she was told, as did the rest of the Muppets, paws, wings, and hands all reached in for a grab at the plastic sticks deciding their fate.

I love that description, the paws, wings, and hands. Really captures the inter-species nature of the Muppets. I can honestly see that.

"Sam?" Rowlf stopped the eagle.

"Yes, o’ pooch of pilfered patriotism?"

"Just go change the tire."

One- I love Rowlf. Two- I love Sam's alliteration. Three- I love Rowlf. He's so down-to-earth. I love it.

“Jack’s not his name," Robin replied. "Jack’s his job."

I know I only quoted one line and it's a whole conversation but- THE MUPPET MOVIE!!!!! And I love that Robin had this line. I'm probably biased, but it's the truth.

"Yeah me too, I’m hungry," Rizzo said.

"And Gonzo and Sweetums are still stuck on the road somewhere!" Fozzie shouted.

"Oh yeah."

These three lines are just so in-character. It's so typical for Rizzo to think of his stomach. It's so typical for Fozzie to remember their real mission, and to point it out. And such a typical reaction from Rizzo. It's just perfect, Prawnie. I love it.

Suddenly, down the road, the Muppets heard a car approaching with music from the twenties playing on the radio.

I was really wracking my brain to figure out who the heck this could be... And it was Statler and Waldorf! And you TOLD me they would be in this chapter, and gosh, they're fantastic!

"Sorry, Kermit," Fozzie wrung his hat in his hands. "But those two are the only things that make my act funny!"

PERFECT! I absolutely ADORE this line! It's like the punchline for the whole scene, and I'm SO glad Fozzie got it! I felt like jumping and squeeing the first time I read that, Prawnie.

Clifford’s car pulled up in front of the theater. Uncle Deadly hadn’t been in a car since before his death, and back then it was mostly common for him to walk, it was a surreal experience.

EXCELLENT detail there. Of course it would be surreal to UD to ride in a car. But who would think of that? Who would mention that? YOU, my dear Prawn, that's who! And I heap large amounts of praise upon you for it!

"All we’ve worked for," Scooter said. "All our hopes, and our dreams, all of them lie in this theater."

"And you’re uncle’s lyin’ in the car," Clifford said.

Scooter sums it up nicely- all their dreams... it's a very Muppety sort of way to look at the theater, and in this case, by Muppety I mean that sort of... just the huge undercurrents of "Yes, this is our dream." And then Clifford shoots it into perspective with a punch-line sort of feel, which just makes it even more Muppety. Reminds me of... Oh where is that quote... Ah, here it is. From our good friend, Frank. "Whenever characters become self-important or sentimental in the Muppets, then there's always another character there to blow them up immediately." I think you really captured that. Minus the dynamite, but it's got the same effect.

Scooter gulped. Skeeter slipped her arm through Clifford’s. "We can do it," Clifford said. "If anyone can, we can."

YAY! And that's SO The Muppets!

"No promises," Clifford said. "We’re family dude, we stick together."

THAT'S The Muppets, too!

"Especially when Bunsen’s canister of Muppet Labs Super Adhesive bursts," Scooter smiled.

"Now that was a sticky situation," Uncle Deadly grinned.

And that's the explosion part of Frank's little quote up there.

Perfect, Prawnie. Just perfect.

MORE PLEASE!