The Muppet Show Script- Tim Brooke-Taylor

[MartyMuppets]

It's been awhile since I've worked on any of this but I'm going to try composing a Vet's Hospital script featuring Hilda as the patient and e-mail it to Dave for comment. I also hope to hear back from him soon regarding the panel discussion script meant to take place immediately afterwards.

I'm also considering re-submitting my other script with Harry Secombe with the suggested changes made in place. Does anybody think I should start a new thread for it or put it on the end of the current thread? I'm inclined to make a whole new start myself but I'm open to opinions.

 

[D'Snowth]

Hey Marty, terribly sorry about this slipping my mind, I KNOW I should visit the fan fiction/fan art board more often, but for some reason I just never think to.

Anyway, just wanted to say your script's turning out very well right now, hope to see it finished pretty soon!

 

[crazed gonzo fa]

Do whatever you think best BBG! God Bless You!

 

[MartyMuppets]

I'm still waiting to hear back from my friend Dave regarding my panel discussion and Vet's Hospital ideas so far. But here's a slight update that would take place immediately after the joke with the periscope in the hecklers box. It's a popular favourite feature. I give you "At the Dance"
(various muppet couples are on the dancing floor including George and Mildred)
George: I've started a new diet Mildred. I want to control my weight.
Mildred: Oh. Do you think you'll succeed George?
George: Suck seed? Hey, I'm not that desperate.

Whatnot lady: Do you love classic monster movies?
Rowlf: I sure do.
Lady: Dracula and Frankenstein?
Rowlf: I think they're great.
Lady: And do you also love Jekyll and Hyde?
Rowlf: I don't know. I've never jekylled any hyde at all.

Janice: Have you ever seen any classic movies with Laurel and Hardy?
Zoot: No but I do see movies with my cousin sometimes.

Mildred: (to a whatnot man hopping up and down by himself) That's an interesting dance step. What do you call it?
Man: I call it dropping the coffee urn on my foot. Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

What do you think of this part ?

 

[crazed gonzo fa]

I love the Jekyll and Hyde line!

 

[Skye]

Lol, so very Muppety, Marty! I love it! I especially adore the part with Mildred and George... "Suck seed." Hehe, that's great! Awesome job, Marty! And I look forward to the parts you'll add when you hear back from Dave, too!

 

[minor muppetz]

Great.

 

[Gorgon Heap]

Fits right in with what went before. "At the Dance" is tough to write, I know, but this reads pretty much like the real thing. Good work!

David "Gorgon Heap" Ebersole

 

[MartyMuppets]

Thanks Dave and thank you also for the advice you gave me regarding my next two sketches but first here's a backstage scene.

(Kermit is at his desk and Fozzie appears moaning)

K: Fozzie. Are you all right?
F: I can't believe Tim said no when I asked him to work with me.
K: Fozzie you shouldn't allow this to upset you so much. Tim had his own free choice. It's nothing to worry about.
F: (raising his voice and waving his arms wildly) Nothing to worry about? All my life I have dreamed about one day appearing side-by-side with Tim Brooke-Taylor! I practically worship the man! He's one of my greatest idols! And he wouldn't listen to me!
(a what-not dressed like a priest appears with a black Bible in his hands)
Priest: Well you should hear what the Good Book says my son. He is a fool who puts his trust in idols who have eyes but cannot see and ears but cannot hear.

(Before Fozzie can reply Gonzo suddenly appears sliding all over the place bumping into Kermit, Fozzie and the Priest one by one)
K: Gonzo. What are you doing?
G: (still out of control) I'm practicing a new act I thought of. Tap dancing with banana skins glued to the soles of my shoes.
Tim: (suddenly appearing) Kermit I want to talk to.....(Gonzo collides with Tim who lands on top of Gonzo with a sharp cry)

F: Oh no! Tim!
Priest: There you see my son. Idols have no way of protecting themselves from desecration at all. Have nothing to do with them.

Vet's Hospital

Announcer: Time once again for Veterinarian's Hospital, the story of a former orthopedic surgeon who's gone to the dogs.
(as the announcer's voice booms out the camera pans onto the operating table where Hilda is lying. Dr.Bob is nowhere in sight however and the two nurses are looking around incredulously)
Piggy: But where is Dr.Bob?
Janice: Calling Dr.Bob. Calling Dr.Bob.
(Dr.Bob enters quickly from Janice's side)
Dr.Bob: Dr.Bob here.
P: Where have you been Dr.Bob?
Dr.B: I was checking on a bunch of frogs in ward 8.
J: What's wrong with them?
Dr.B: Every single one of them has a man caught in his throat. So what do we have here?
Hilda: Doctor. Can you recommend something I can take for wind?
Dr.B: I certainly can. Go out for lunch at Emilio's Italian Restaurant on the corner of third and main. His food is guaranteed to give you wind every time.
Hilda: But Doctor. I already have wind. I want to get rid of it.
Dr.B: Why would you want to waste it? With a good supply of wind inside you could become an excellent concert trumpet player.
P: Seriously Dr.Bob. Shouldn't you operate on this patient?
Dr.B: No I'm afraid not.
J: But why Dr.Bob?
Dr.B: I'm booked solid until Winds-day.
(everybody laughs)
Announcer: And so an ill breeze blows Dr.Bob's way. Tune in next week when we'll hear Nurse Janice say:
J: So what can we do for her then?
Dr.B: We can call in a substitute doctor I know. She's a specialist in these cases.
P: Oh. What's her name?
Dr.B: Dr. Gail Tempest
(everybody laughs once again)

 

[Daffyfan4ever]

Haha, very funny new part, Marty! It's awesome! I love Behemoth's line about tripping the waitor! Extremely entertaining part with Batman and Robin... we do seem to like the dark comedy sometimes, don't we? Very, very funny talk spot with Tim and Kermit. Haha, love what he said about Piggy! Somebody should've told him to watch it around her! And I adore the Statler/Waldorf joke at the end, hehe! Perfect! Can't wait for more when you can!

You could have had Robin the Frog play Robin. He did exist in the first season. Just thought I'd mention it.