The Fifth Semi-Annual Muppet Central Awards Ceremony!

[TogetherAgain]

Lisa: Oh, that's me! <gets into harness and unties self from chair> LOOK OUT BELOW! <zips down to the stage to collect award> OOF--Rough landing. <ahem> WELL! FIRST of all, I would be making a GRAVE mistake if I didn't thank the original reader of "Amazon? Moi?" and that of course would be Layla, who saw the opening lines of the opening chapter back when the story was just known as "jungle." She's also the Third Half, and she lives in a closet in my brain, and... yeah, she's awesome. ALSO, thanks muchly to Prawnie, my other Half, because he's awesome and very encouraging always, AND, thank you to all my OTHER readers here, and last but not least, thank you to my other two minds. NEXT! <zips back up to the ceiling>

 

[theprawncracker]

PRAWNIE: Gah! I’m touched, guys, really! I was up against so many hilarious fics! Can’t believe I got it. Thank you all! And... nice speech, half, but ya didn't answer my question! ...Get back to me on that. Anyhow! Here’s Lew Zealand!

(LEW ZEALAND runs onstage) (Applause)

LEW ZEALAND: (laughs) Hi there! You know what I’m here to present? The award for Best One-Shot Fan-Fiction of the Year! And I know a thing or two about one-shots! (throws a boomerang fish towards the ceiling) Ha ha ha! See? I had one shot to hit them! Hoo hoo! Anyway, here are the contenders for “Light Reading”…
Christmas Cheer
An All Hollow’s Eve
Short Stories
A Day For Sweetums
And the winner is… Christmas Cheer by TogetherAgain! (laughs) That’s a good one!

ANNOUNCER: This was the first Christmas fan-fiction by TogetherAgain—and also the first one she actually finished in a long time. …And theprawncracker paid me to say that too.

 

[Beauregard]

Beau: *applauding*
Bobo: *applauding*
Bo: * appalling*
Bean: *appealing*

 

[TogetherAgain]

Lisa: Oh, good thing I didn't tie myself back to the chair. <zips back down> Um, ditto the last speech... and... Prawnie, honey, you're the Duke of Chutney, remember? I should know. I made the crown. <zips back up>

 

[Beauregard]

Beauregard Janitor: *still rumaging through sock drawer* Ooh, a crown...I'll have that.

 

[theprawncracker]

PRAWNIE: I did not pay that announcer! Sheesh… and yes, yes, I know I'm the Duke... but King sounds so much... royaller! Huh. Well, anyway! Up next, Red Fraggle!

(RED bounces onstage) (Applause)

RED: Hiya! How’s everybody enjoying the party? I know I am! Anyway! I’m here to present the award for “Resident Librarian”! …Resident Librarian? Why would they give me, Red Fraggle, the most exciting Fraggle, the most boring award title? Hmph! We’ll just have to spice this up! So I’ll SHOUT THE REST OF THE PRESENTATION! HERE ARE THE CONTEDNERS FOR BEST FAN-FICTION READER!
Winslow Leach
The Count
RedPiggy
Muppetfan44
RedBoobergurl
AND THE WINNER IS… THE COUNT! HOO HOO HOO!

ANNOUNCER: Ed tries his best to keep up with every fan-fiction on the board—he also started the Fan-Fiction Index that is extremely helpful to new and old readers alike.

 

[Beauregard]

Bo: *arriving from the future in a orange ship, with a beard and a walking stick* Who are you calling an old reader!
Beauregard: *arriving as above with beard and walking stick* What he said!
Bobo: *same as the others* Hey...
Bean: *bouncing from the future orange ship as young and spritly as ever* Come along gramps! Let's go congratulate that man! *bouncy*

 

[theprawncracker]

PRAWNIE: And now we have Cantus Fraggle here to present the award for Fan-Fiction of the Year!

(CANTUS comes on stage) (Loud cheering and applause)

CANTUS: (silences crowd) Hail, Muppet Central! I have traveled many a’cave to find this theater here, and I still do not know why I did! I am here to award a very talented author with the most prestigious honor of the “Golden Book” award for Best Fan-Fiction of the Year. But aren’t all fan-fictions of the year the best/ All writing is right! You must write what’s right, right? Mm… yes. Here are the contenders…
Weddings Are Disastrous by theprawncracker
It’s a Long Way to the Top by WhiteRabbit
Change of Heart by Redsonga
The Fraggle From Outer Space by Redsonga
Kermie’s Girl by Ruahnna
Rock and Rain by Redsonga
And the winner of Best Fan-Fiction of the Year—even though they are all the best in this minstrel’s eyes—is… Weddings Are Disastrous by theprawncracker!

ANNOUNCER: By now you know who this prawncracker kid is and what he’s done—so just go back and look.

 

[TogetherAgain]

YEAH PRAWNIE! Man, he's rakin' 'em in tonight!

 

[Beauregard]

Bo: You know WAD is the Slumdog of the MC awards...
Bobo: They confiscated all our slumanimals at the door...
Beau: *blink*