Muppet College Dorms: The Next Semester

[anytimepally]

One Man's Monkey, Part I

Sal: Hey, is that guy ever getting’ outta bed? He’s been sleeping since Johnny and I got back from the show last night.
Randall: Oh, Don’s just trying to sleep off a woman, Sal. He’ll be all right.. just needs some time, that’s all.
Sal: You mean, The Pig?
(I nod.)
Sal: That pig’s always trouble, Randall . . . Johnny & I warned him.
Randall: I don’t think “I told you so” is what he needs to hear right now, Sal.
Sal: Yeah, I guess.
Randall: Listen.. I’ve got to run to the store.. be back in a bit, ok.
Sal: Yeah, sure.. oh, and if you see Johnny, tell him I’m gettin’ his suits ironed.
(I leave.)
Sal walks over to Tony Bennett and turns him on. Music starts playing.

Tony: (singing)

Smile . . . though your heart is aching
Smile . . . even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll see the sun come shining through for you

(Don, hearing the song, awakens and sits up in bed.)

Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile . . . what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile . . .
If you just smile

That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile . . . what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile . . .

(Tony goes back into his booth.)

Don: (tearing up) Thanks, Sal.. that really helps.
Sal: Yeah yeah.. Tony’s great.. always cheers me up when Johnny’s yelling at me.
Don: Nice to have him around here . . . and you, too, Sal.
Sal: Aww.. thanks, Don.
Don: (with gusto) Well, can’t stay in bed all day when there’s work to be done. There are legendary songs just waiting to be written!
Sal: Yeah.. and I gotta get ironing Johnny’s shirts. He wears about three per day.. it’s hard to keep up sometimes.

 

[redBoobergurl]

Beth: No time to write...I'm getting so frustrated!
Cookie: What wrong?
Beth: I've just had a rough week at work so far and I have this story I'm writing
Cookie: The one about doggie?
Beth: Yep and I know what I want to do with it and everything but I have had literally no time to write!
Cookie: That too bad
Beth: And I've just had to deal with some stuff that hasn't been all that pleasant this week so I'm just frustrated
Cookie: You know what me do when me frustrated?
Beth: Eat cookies?
Cookie: That too, but me also go find someone to give me hug
Beth: Oh, I see...
Cookie: You want hug?
Beth: Yeah, that would be nice
*Cookie gives Beth big monster hug*
Cookie: That better?
Beth *a little smushed*: Yeah, not sure if I can breathe, but better. Thanks.

 

[theprawncracker]

Ryan: *paces around room* Well... I've been stuck in here all day and I still haven't gotten any writing done, so I guess Ed and Uncle D.'s plan isn't working all too well.
Uncle Deadly: *knocks on door from outside* Ryan, if I was to fry one of your Muppet figurines, which would you want to go first?
Ryan: ...This is cruel and unusual. *begins writing*
Gonzo: *from outside room* Of course it's unusual, I live here!

 

[The Count]

You leave those figures or figurines alone Uncle D. Ryan has as big a love for those as I do. And if you mean any harm to them, well, I won't post the new segment of my own story.

*Sets to writing to post and hold a trump card over other fanfic authors.

 

[theprawncracker]

Uncle Deadly: *whispering to Ed* 'Twas just a ploy my fiend, I would never harm these plastic pearls, you know that. Now, do continue with your own story, as I'm sure Ryan is continuing his.

*Meanwhile, in Ryan's bedroom*

Ryan: *playing harmonica* Time passes slow when you're in the cooler...

 

[anytimepally]

One Man's Monkey, Part II

Johnny: (entering the room) Hiya, Sal.. you got those shirts done?
Sal: Yeah, Johnny.. pressed and starched, just like ya like ‘em.
Johnny: Thanks, Sal.. (noticing Don working hard at his piano) .. Don? You’re awake.
Don: Yeah.. you were right about Miss Piggy after all.
Johnny: That’ll teach you to listen to Johnny Fiama when I tell you something.. experience is a hard teacher.
Don: I know.. but she was nothing special. Just another woman.
Johnny: You’re being too kind, Don.
Don: (taking the bait) And what made her think she was good enough for the great Don Music, anyway. I have higher standards than that.
Johnny: God willing, everyone does, Don. The Pig may be very talented, but she’s just not girlfriend material.
Don: (hesitantly defiant) You’re . . . right! It makes me feel like singing! … But I won’t.

(Don goes back to working on his next musical creation.)

Sal: Whatcha want I should do now, Johnny?
Johnny: I brought some lunch back, so I’m gonna be eatin’ that while I’m doin’ my vocal exercises.
Sal: Gee, thanks Johnny.. I am gettin’ kinda hungry.
Johnny: Whatdaya mean, Sal? This is my lunch!
Sal: (slinking away) Oh.. sorry Johnny.
Don: You should be more considerate, Johnny. Sal’s spent the whole day doing things for you.. ironing your shirts, dusting Tony Bennett, making your bed.. you could’ve at least brought him lunch, too.
Johnny: It’s none of your business, Donny boy.
Don: Someone’s got to stick up for Sal!
Johnny: Sal’s a big monkey.. he can look after himself! And I don’t have to stand around here and listen to this! Sal, get the door.

(Sal opens the door and Johnny storms from the room with his lunch, slamming the door behind him.)

 

[The Count]

*Whispering back to Uncle D: Yes, I know that full well, but I had to go along with your rousse old spook.
BTW: Do you have your trusty golden hanger with you? Should hate to think what would happen if Ryan got a hold of it.

 

[theprawncracker]

Uncle Deadly: *waves lock-pick around* Right here my fiend. I never let it leave my person.

*Meanwhile in Room 25*

Clifford: Got any fives?
Ernie: Go fish.
Ernie: How about threes?
Camilla: Brawk bawk.

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Nora: (singing in a silly sort of way) But we've got high hopes, high apple-pie-in the-sky hopes.
Storyteller: Hmm, speaking of apple pie, I hope you've learned your lesson about wantonly launching articles of confectionery around the RHLC at high velocity.
Nora: What lesson?
Storyteller: That pie-throwing leads to bruised egos and sticky floors.
Nora: Gee, I didn't know that was part of the deal...apart from Uncle Deadly threatening Scooter, it was all lots of fun.
Storyteller: (sigh) Where's the third occupant of this room, the glasses-wearing Silly Creature?
Nora: Making trifle over in the RHLC. And talking about some quilt book.

 

[The Count]

Hmmm... Home again, and tomorrow's my off day. Too bad I've got stuff that needs taking care of that'll keep me busy all day long. Oh well, at least I hope Beth's found the new segment I posted and it cheers her up regarding her own fanfic foibles.

That reminds me, need to talk to her and/or Cath, will drop them a PM soon.