(Fozzie Bear comes running down the hall, flings open the door to room 20 and dashes inside. He leans, panting, against the door, in obvious terror. Catherine walks over to put a hand on his arm.)
Fozzie: Ahhhhh! Oh--it's you. (nervously) Um--it is you, right, Ru, um, Catherine?
Catherine: It's me, Fozzie. What's the matter?
Fozzie: (whispering) Um, I think I've slipped into some sort of alternate universe. Did you fall through the opening, too?
Catherine: Um, is someone serving, um, grown-up eggnog here in the dorms?
Fozzie: No--it's just--ahhh! (pointing and staring over Catherine's shoulder) Ahhhh!
(Catherine looks around and sees Piggy and Kermit behind her. Fozzie continues to look frightened.)
Catherine: Honey, it's just Piggy and Kermit. What's wrong?
Fozzie: But, but I--I just SAW them--right across the hall--in Layla's room. They were, um, (indistinct mumble).
Kermit: What?
Piggy: Who?
Fozzie: Um, you guys. You were, um, kissing. But--but now you're here, and there, and I don't even know if I'm me.
Catherine: (With a oopsie-face at Kermit and Piggy) Um, Fozzie, it's okay. That wasn't our Kermit and Piggy. This is our Kermit and Piggy.
Fozzie: No? (whispering) Then who were they?
Catherine: Um, do you remember Robot Kermit?
Fozzie: Yesssss.
Catherine: Well, um, you know about the recent unpleasantness in our room because of what happened when Robot Kermit tried to take Kermit's place here?
Fozzie: (hat over face) I remember.
Catherine: Um, so we wanted to do something that might prevent that sort of thing from happening again so, well, we, um, had Dr. Honeydew and Beaker put together a Robot Piggy. Now Robot Kermit has-- (breaks off at a hard look from Piggy) --has a friend, that is, another robot friend who seems well-suited to.... (trails off in surprise, and then a big goofy smile breaks across her face) And they were kissing?!
Fozzie: Uh hum.
(Immediately, Fozzie has to flatten himself against the wall as three excited bodies hurl themselves out the door to peek around the doorframe diagonally across the hall. Everybody says "ahhh" and then trails back to room 20.)
Catherine: Wow--that worked a lot better than I hoped.
Piggy: (eying Kermit with something akin to dissatisfaction) That happened a lot faster than I expected.
Kermit: (indignantly) Hey--what's that supposed to mean?
Piggy: (sailing past him toward the tree with an impish look) All I'm saying is that somebody seems to have all of his circuits firing--and somebody doesn't.
Kermit: Oh yeah? Well come over here and I'll show you a thing or two.
(Laughing, they proceed to chase each other around the tree for some moments. This argument has a forgone conclusion, and while they are getting to the part where they stand with their arms around each other under the mistletoe and kiss, Catherine takes Fozzie over to the kitchen and pours them each a cup of cocoa.
Catherine: So, you feeling better now that classes are over?
Fozzie: Yes! I was so worried about my final in Advanced Heckler Defense Strategy, but it actually seemed to go okay.
Catherine: (looking quickly away) Do tell?
Fozzie: (sitting at the table) Well, you know how nervous I was about my routine, right?
Catherine: (sympathetically) I remember.
Fozzie: And I was so worried that I was going to get nervous and be terrible. But when I came out to do my exam routine, all of my classmates were there in the auditorium, too. I thought it was just going to be me and the professors, but everyone was there to support me. And everybody got a chance to vote on how I did.
Catherine: And you did okay?
Fozzie: (looking down for a moment) Well, they laughed at some of my jokes, and they clapped when it was over. And half of our grade is based on how much we had improved. (whispering) I think I improved a lot.
Catherine: Of course you did! Fozzie, I'm so proud of you!
Fozzie: Gee, thanks. You know, there's just one thing that seemed funny to me.
Catherine: (nervously) Um, what was that?
Fozzie: I was really nervous about these professors, but it's almost like there were different people in the sound booth that day.
Catherine: (choking on her hot chocolate) *coff* *coff* Oh! *coff* I'm sure it was just because you were nervous. I'm sure they weren't, you know, tied up in their office or anything.
Fozzie: Aaaahhhh! Good one! Wocka wocka! You know, I guess Christmas wishes do sometimes come true.
Catherine: (looking toward the living area, where all sounds of fighting have ceased) Yeah. It sure looks that way. So--you want some more tofu and stuffing? I made gravy!
Fozzie: Definitely!
Catherine: (bending to plant a kiss on Fozzie's fuzzy head) Merry Christmas, Fozzie.
Fozzie: Merry Christmas, Catherine.
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