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The BMI index doctors use is a little misleading. I’m just under six feet, I’m at 208 pounds, and not one of my doctors see anything wrong with that. The heaviest I ever was, back in 2016, I broke my ankle (shattered is more like it) and off my feet for the better part of a year. I topped out at...

What I wouldn’t give to be 150 again. People say I don’t look fat, but I am heavy. Part of it comes with age, part of it was eating a little too good. At least I still only have one chin.

And pretty soon you’ll have a well-rounded gut.

Any dang fool knows you don’t mow wet grass. It will stick to the blades, clog up the mower, and you can burn out the motor.

Out in PA there’s a Pepperidge Farm outlet store. When they have an overrun of product, they bring it here and mark the prices way down. Cookies, breads, rolls, the place is crawling with starch. Everything is still fresh, they’re not selling stale bread or anything. I like Milanos. Sometimes...

I was around when these shows were brand new. Having Elton John was a huge score. At the time, Elton John was as big as the Beatles were in the sixties. The year before he had a #1 hit with “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart”, with Kiki Dee instead of Miss Piggy. Good stuff.

Anchovies are part of a real genuine Caesar salad, but it’s usually left out because they’re pretty expensive. Olives are salty too. The black ones are okay. But the green ones with the pimentos are nasty and bitter.

When the saltiest among us decrees so, one must take pause.

ILooking back when I was little, I got to know all four of my grandparents. They only lived two blocks from each other. So Sunday afternoons, got to visit my mom’s folks, then see my dad’s folks. I was in heaven. I’m old enough to be a grandpa myself. I have a few friends younger than me who are...

But salty is your middle name!

I thought pepperoni was the best pizza topping until I tried chicken bacon ranch. Completely unrelated, my mom is coming up next month. She’ll be craving bagels since they’re hard to find in Nashville. Because there’s such a heavy Jewish population up here, bagel shops are all over.

Dunking fig newtons in scotch doesn’t sound so far fetched. However, beer on Rice Krispies, not so much. But that’s all Rosie had. Orangejuice and vodka makes a screwdriver, and I have one happy wife. Some fancy brunches offer Mermosas, which is orange juice and champagne. The only other...

Today is Fathers Day. My dad passed away 12 years ago, and despite his many shortcomings, he did teach me a few good lessons. 1) Whatever you choose to do with your life, give it all you got. Don’t do a half-a$$ed job. At work, in school, get ready to bust your butt to do the best you can...

Jehovah Raffah God is the great healer.

The only thing worse is drinking orange juice right after you brushed your teeth. Even though it’s not a food, I’ve been finding out a lot of toothpastes have sugar in them. That seems to defeat the whole purpose. One way to really get your teeth clean is baking soda. It’s pretty abrasive and...

Weed won’t help you fall asleep? Eating turkey?

Well, everyone will feel different effects, and Pfizer, Moderna, and J&J will differ from each other. The most I felt was a sore arm.

It’s nice to see many COVID restrictions being lifted. But they’re still enforced in doctors offices and hospitals. I’m at my eye doctor now. I might be the oldest one on here, but I’m his youngest patient. Dr. Sachs treats old people and their parents. There aren’t too many places where they...

See? You lived.

The clerk could’ have saved himself so much hassle if he just apologized. Saying something offensive is bad enough. Doubling down on it makes it worse.