The New New Quote Thread

MikaelaMuppet

Well-Known Member
Joined
Apr 28, 2013
Messages
10,583
Reaction score
3,104
This one is a bit long.

Oscar: What do you mean you want to put the pieces together for? It's looks better this way. Like a busted Clarinet. Which is perfect!
Richard Stoltzman: (Chuckles) Yeah I know, Oscar. But you can't play a clarinet, Until you put the pieces together, (Holds up a clarinet that put together) That looks a lot like this one here.
Oscar: Well, Who cares if you play it. Personally, I like to see you drop it and break it. I love broken clarinets.
Telly Monster: Well, I care if he plays. So you go ahead and built it.
Richard Stoltzman: Okay, Here is the first part....
*Toots it and it makes an awful sound*
Oscar: NO, WAIT! I like that! It sounded like a funny duck.
Richard Stoltzman: I knew you would. And now, Here is the second part. The Barrel.
Telly Monster: It looks teeny.
*Toots it*
Oscar: Oh, NO! NO! NO! It looked better before.
Richard Stoltzman: Alright, How about the third part?
*Toots it*
Oscar: Oh, NO! NO! NO! You are going into the wrong direction!
Telly Monster: Aw, It's getting to sound good, Oscar.
Richard Stoltzman: Okay, Now this is the forth part. Oh, This is for you, Oscar.
*Toots it and it buzzes*
Oscar: Wow! Hey, That wasn't bad.
Richard Stoltzman: Okay, Telly. Can you guess this part is?
Telly Monster: I don't know, Is it the end?
Richard Stoltzman: Well, That's a good guess. And it's also know as the bell.
Telly Monster: Oh, The bell.
Richard Stoltzman: And that's the last part. And now, You got a clarinet that's like the one that's put together and it's ready to be played from the bottom to the top.
Telly Monster: Let's hear it.
Richard Stoltzman: Okay, Here we go! (Plays the opening to Rhapsody in Blue on the clarinet)
 

Froggy Fool

Well-Known Member
Joined
Nov 4, 2017
Messages
2,964
Reaction score
1,998
@D'Snowth - Honestly this might be my favorite Steve D'Monster episode! It never fails to make me laugh! :laugh:

Computer: Congratulations, we have your results!
Steve: Oh goody!
Computer: Using the answers you have supplied us with this survey, we have determined that your intelligence is equivalent to the IQ of the common house plant.
[Steve is gaping.]​
Computer: We have also determined that you are ignorant, arrogant, impulsive, illiterate, and may have some inferiority issues.
Steve: WHAT??!! Why you -- you stupid little -- I can't believe you, well - GEE WHIZ!! That was a really dumb survey! Some computer you are!
 

Pig'sSaysAdios

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 12, 2015
Messages
6,418
Reaction score
4,644
@D'Snowth - Honestly this might be my favorite Steve D'Monster episode! It never fails to make me laugh! :laugh:

Computer: Congratulations, we have your results!
Steve: Oh goody!
Computer: Using the answers you have supplied us with this survey, we have determined that your intelligence is equivalent to the IQ of the common house plant.
[Steve is gaping.]​
Computer: We have also determined that you are ignorant, arrogant, impulsive, illiterate, and may have some inferiority issues.
Steve: WHAT??!! Why you -- you stupid little -- I can't believe you, well - GEE WHIZ!! That was a really dumb survey! Some computer you are!
Yeah, that ones my favorite one. :big_grin:
 

D'Snowth

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2003
Messages
38,849
Reaction score
12,814
My favorite aspect of it is the VCR question, because I once took a questionaire on the internet like ten years ago; it was a multiple choice questionaire, and one of the questions was "Have you ever taken a VCR apart to figure out how it works?" One of the multiple-choice answers was, "Yes, and now it doesn't." No foolin'.
 

Pig'sSaysAdios

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 12, 2015
Messages
6,418
Reaction score
4,644
My favorite aspect of it is the VCR question, because I once took a questionaire on the internet like ten years ago; it was a multiple choice questionaire, and one of the questions was "Have you ever taken a VCR apart to figure out how it works?" One of the multiple-choice answers was, "Yes, and now it doesn't." No foolin'.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
 
Top