Two Ball Waltz

[WebMistressGina]

For some reason, I came here earlier and the site wasn't working. And now it is. Which is good, cause it's just in time for my next chapter!



Chapter VII

The New Year


The world managed to last from Thanksgiving to Christmas before welcoming the New Year on a bright sunny Friday morning. For most, the new year represented another year to change their ways, change their fortunes, and changing of their destinies for the better or at least until the next year where they would be doing the same dance all over again.

The new year also presented itself a new beginning as far as Scooter and Amanda were concerned. New beginnings and new stresses, that is to say. While they wouldn’t stop with their plans to get married in March, planning for a wedding was completely different from thinking or talking about planning for a wedding, especially when planning a wedding in as little as two months. While they had managed to get many things out of the way – the flowers, the food, the music, and the minister – they still had to find a venue in which to host both the wedding and the reception, as well as trying to find their perfect house before they actually said I do.

The latter was the thing they were having the most trouble with. Since the housing bubble burst, homes were still out of reach for many young couples or worse, not on the market for said young couple; Scooter was actually surprised to see construction of a newly built home on his way to and from the theater and towards his own townhome one day. The outside was a nice beige and it looked to be a two-story home, with a nice front yard and looked like an even bigger one in the back. He couldn’t help himself, pulling over to the curb and walking towards one of the workers to ask what they were building.

He hadn’t wanted to get his hopes up, but he had and they were dashed as soon as he discovered that the house was being built for someone because of course it was. He bet it even had an office. Disappointed as he was, he had at least an actual idea for what he wanted their house to be, an actual image that wasn’t just something they had in their heads. If he could find an identical house – one of the reasons he asked for a business card, in the hopes they would either be aware or be building another such house – then his housing issues would be solved.

It would probably take a few years of course, but they would be solved at least.

When Scooter wasn’t worried about his upcoming wedding, he was equally worried about their upcoming shows. Their last show had been a Christmas special, taking the whole hour, and literally taking most of their acts to cover it. They’d be coming back in April, as planned, which meant if Scooter chose to do so – and he was pretty sure the others would make him – he could enjoy a whole month of being a newlywed. Still, he wouldn’t be the stage manager if he wasn’t considering some of the different aspects of the show while he could, before the rest of his time would be taken up by wedding preparations.

Even their normal weekly meetings had been cancelled, with no plans for anyone to come back before his wedding and no one being back on the studio lot until at least the second week of April if they could help it.

While Scooter was trying to find anything work related to help relieve the stress of figuring out his wedding, Amanda was trying to scrounge up people to come to her wedding. As an only child, Mandy didn’t have any brothers, sisters, nieces, and nephews to call up, though she did have a few relatives, thanks to her father. She hadn’t mentioned it to Scooter, but sometimes the family atmosphere that the Muppets presented left her, well…wanting. While Scooter may have been adopted into the group, they felt very much as though he was a kid brother and treated him as such at times.

And she knew they equally loved her, but maybe not as the little sister she may have liked, but as Scooter’s intended and future bride. And certainly, that was enough for her to live with, to know they had accepted her fully just as she had accepted them. But it meant that Scooter had no shortage of people coming to see them married, where as she…well…

Both of her parents had been only children as well and with her mother dead, it only left her and her father really. She vaguely remembered her grandparents, but they had passed on and she really only saw them during the yearly trip to visit their graves. There was a great uncle or two that she thought she remembered, but she would have to consult with her father to see if they were even still alive to invite.

She of course had friends, but many of them had gone to other parts of the states and the world and most were reachable by social media more often than not. Just as she beginning to fall deeper into despair, her face immediately lit up and she quickly grabbed her cell and started dialing a number.

“Well, look who it is! I was afraid my visit was the only time you would grace me with your presence again.”

“Never,” she laughed. “In fact, I can’t believe I was stupid enough not to think of calling you sooner.”

“Oh yeah?” asked the voice, humor turning to concern lacing the tone. “Something wrong, Mandy?”

“Oh my darling, no,” she sighed, happily. “I am probably the happiest woman in the world right now.”

“I see,” came the snigger. “I take it you and the yummy Scooter patched things up even before I left town. Don’t think I didn’t notice the looks the two of you were giving each other when you dropped me off at the airport. You know, if the two of you ever wanted to be adventurous…”

Amanda couldn’t help but laugh out, remembering a conversation not too long ago with Scooter on a similar topic. “Scottie Too Hottie, how I adore you.”

“Oh I know, sweetness,” Scott Coulter chuckled. “But I hardly think you called me up to tell me you and Scooter are uh…singing songs to the heavens…”

“Crass.”

“Truthful,” the blonde countered. “So what do I have the pleasure?”

“I’m getting married!”

“Great balls of fire!”

“And after thinking for all of thirty minutes, there is no one else I want to be my maid of honor, but you.”

“Gay of honor,” Scottie corrected. “Or Man of Honor. I do say, I like that. Oh, does that mean I get to plan your bachelorette party? Because I know places I want to take you.”

“I take it the news is pleasing?”

“Oh honey,” Scottie purred. “The pleasure you’ve given. Now I know why Scooter wants to marry you.”

“Horrible,” she laughed.

“And you love it,” he retorted. “Tell me the date and I’ll be there weeks in advance, with bells on.”

[hr]

The wedding was going to be small, at least that was how the two redheads intended it. With Amanda’s small enough as it was family, she didn’t feel right in just throwing a huge to-do when most of Scooter’s family and friends would be filling it, especially when all the group needed was an excuse to have a party. Scooter of course wanted to go whatever his bride wanted, even going as far as thinking perhaps eloping was a much better way to go.

“We are not eloping.”

“Sweetheart, think about it!” he persisted. “We’d only have to invite a few people with us, Vegas is only a few hours away if we drove, and we wouldn’t have to worry about some large and oversized wedding party. Or worse! Having our wedding get crashed!”

“Baby,” she said, taking his face in her hands. While most Muppets tended to go for the shaved face look, there were some who managed to get a moustache or full beard out of it. Scooter was not one of those people, though he could manage a little bit of scruff if he neglected to shave for a few weeks; he’s grown a bit of a beard with some of the others for Movember, making him look even more delectable than he was now. As she held his face now, she feel the prickles of hair, indicating he hadn’t shaved in a few days.

“Even if our wedding was made up of nothing but Muppets, I would still want something small.”

“But it’s your wedding day, Mandy,” he whispered. “It should be, you know…nice.”

“And it will be,” she said. “Because I’m marrying you. That’s the whole point of having a wedding in the first place, to combine my life with the person I love more than anything. Eloping is fine, but I want my family and friends to be there and there is something special about being able to stand up in front of them and say, ‘this is the man I plan on spending the rest of my life with.’ Does that make sense?”

He kissed her. Not only because her speech made perfect sense, but because it was what he wanted too. He was never so over the moon about getting married as he was now, finding the woman that he wanted to spend his life with and knowing that he did want everyone to see this day, to see that their little teenaged headache – as he had once been described and on more than one occasion – had grown up. Had grown up well.

“Now I know why Kermit gives you all those heartfelt speeches,” she grinned, rubbing her nose against his. “You think Piggy thanks him like this when he does?”

“I would rather not think of anything Piggy and Kermit do that is remotely close to whatever we’re doing,” he groused. “Young sensibilities and all that.”

“Right.”


[hr]


“Hey Kermit, can I talk to you?”

He hadn’t meant to put this off, he didn’t, but even after his lunch with Piggy and her certainty that the frog would of course say yes to whatever it was that Scooter asked, the stage manager was still a bit hesitant at actually doing it. In any other case, he would have a brother or friend or something to stand by his side, but those were exactly who the Muppets were to him; he couldn’t ask for better best friends and Kermit was exactly that to him. Well, to be fair – and if he ever said it out loud – Kermit was far more than just Scooter’s friend; both he and Piggy were so much more than his friends. He had thought about asking Piggy to stand up for him – after all, it would completely within their antics to do whatever they could that defied convention – but Amanda had wanted to ask the diva to stand up with her, as one of her bridesmaids and Scooter didn’t want to take that from her.

So the redhead finally gathered his courage and went to find Kermit, not at all surprised when the frog was doing exactly what he told the others not to do – deep within paperwork in his office on Office Row.

“Hey Kermit,” he asked, poking his head through the door opening. “Can I talk to you?”

“Of course, Scooter,” the frog said, waving his assistant in. “What’s up?”

Scooter took a seat in the chair that sat in front of Kermit’s desk, something that was rarely used along with the office. Despite having private offices on the studio lot, most of the time they went unused, as no one hardly ever went in them; at least during show production. It wasn’t unheard of for them to use the offices during movie productions, if only to just have five minutes of peace before the chaos began or to find something to do when there wasn’t anything for you to do.

Scooter usually never had any issues with seeing Kermit in his office, both on the lot and within the theater, but for some reason, the redhead’s nerves seemed to be getting the best of him at the moment. This situation was eerily similar to his coming to Chase Cosgrove all those months ago in order to ask for his daughter’s hand and now, something as simple as asking if his friend, mentor, and father figure would so kindly stand up with him in front of hundreds of people as his best man seemed even more terrifying than asking to marry his intended.

“Um…” he began, scratching at an imaginary itch behind his ear. “So, I don’t know if you heard, but…I’m getting married in a few months.”

Kermit smiled slowly. “Yeah, I heard.”

“Awesome,” Scooter said, rushing the word out in a breath. Maybe if he just asked very quickly, he could get this over with and not feel so…so… “Anyway, in case you were wondering, I totally want you to be there, at the wedding I mean.”

“Were you not planning to invite me?”

“What!?” he exclaimed. “No! I mean yes! I mean, I’m totally inviting you to the wedding, Kermit!”

“Oh good.”

“Did you think I wasn’t?” Scooter asked, dismayed that his friend and leader would think he wouldn’t be going to the wedding. Of course he would come to the wedding! What kind of friend would he be not to invite him?

“Scooter, of course not…”

“Because you’re totally coming to my wedding!” the redhead charged on. “You are coming to my wedding, aren’t you?”

“Scooter, of course I am!”

“Good! Because I am totally inviting you to come. I mean, why would I not? You’re my friend, Kermit! Of course I would want you in my wedding! I mean, I don’t think there was ever a time that you wouldn’t have been included in my wedding. Not that I’ve sat around thinking about my wedding one day. Okay, there was that one time, but I totally blame Piggy for that…”

Kermit wasn’t sure if he should stop the ramblings or enjoy them for what they were. Of course he knew Scooter was going to ask him to be in the wedding, Piggy had told him as such, she just didn’t bother to tell him what he was actually going to do. That of course was besides the point and as he watched and listened to Scooter ramble on about…actually, he wasn’t really sure at the moment, as the assistant seemed to go off on a tangent about Piggy, robots, and ninjas – something he would have to put a pin in and investigate later – he had been well aware when the page had come in and sat down that there was something on his mind.

It did give him a chance to look, really look, at the man his assistant had turned into. Sometimes Kermit couldn’t believe how much time had passed from one moment to the next; one day, this pushy kid walks into his theater, stating that he’s the new gofer and the next, that same kid had grown up before his eyes and was getting married. It was the same feeling he got whenever he saw Robin, the little tadpole was very much a teenager now and in another year, would probably be taller than his uncle.

Time in a bottle, indeed.

Scooter’s ramblings were getting even more random – he was going to have another talk with Gonzo about an incident with the woman’s dressing room apparently – to the point where the frog had to take pity on him. It was obvious the kid was nervous, but about what? Of course he was planning on going to the wedding and whatever role Scooter wanted him for, he would be happy to perform, but if he let the redhead continue at this pace, he wouldn’t be able to figure out what it was he was supposed to do.

“Andrew.”

And that was all it took. Very few people actually used Scooter’s first name, in fact Kermit was sure that only about handful of people even knew his first name, and Kermit was not one of them. Oh, he knew it obviously – he did sign Scooter’s paychecks – but he never felt the need to really ever use it. Scooter was his name and that’s what he was to be called. There were times, however, that using one’s full name did tend to get their attention – Piggy certainly used it to get her point across, though he doubted very much the redhead ever truly minded that fact – but never did.

Or rather, he never needed to.

Kermit, despite his rather reluctant status as leader and hero to the masses, could easily hold an authoritative air when he needed. An outraged sigh, huff, or the way he said a person’s name was enough, usually, to get their attention. Kinda like now.

“I know you didn’t just come in here to invite me to your wedding,” Kermit began. “Though thank you for the formal invitation. I’m guessing her royal highness is invited too or can I use her as my plus one?”

“Do you wanna be my best man?”

“What?”

“I know it’s a crazy thing to ask,” Scooter started up again. “But you’re…you’re…” One of my best friends, I love you, you’re like a father to me, the closest thing to a real father that I’ve ever had and I really want you to approve of how my life is going, if I’ve made the right choices, if I’m doing the right thing…

“Do you wanna?”

He’s going to say no. His face is totally saying no. Oh my God, why did I ask!? Stupid!

“I’d be honored.”

Of course I’d be your best man, I love you, you’re one of my boys, I couldn’t have raised a better son if you were my own, do you have any idea how proud you’ve made me? How proud you’ve made all of us? We’ll sign the adoption papers today if you want…

“Cool.”


-------------------------------

What's coming up next, WMG?

We'll fast forward to the month of March, where Kermit and company kidnap our friendly neighborhood groom for his bachelor party, while Scottie takes the girls to a floating prison and the Castro district.

If you're good boys and girls, I may even have that up for you later

 

[The Count]

If the girls are going to the Castro District, please remember to leave some flowers in memory of Robin. No, not Kermit's nephew, the comedian.

And yes, the forum was down most of the day, probably maintenancy type stuff I'd imagine.

*Has a sneaking suspicion about who that house's being built for.

"scourge up some friends"? Did you mean "scrounge"?
Movember? Maybe that's the month that comes after Septober up on Mars, telling us it's time for Septoberfest and then Movember Mipmas.
Yip yip yip yip yip yip, uh-huh uh-huh.

Thankses for the Mupdate, tis always a treat to read your stuff with Scoot and Mandy.

 

[WebMistressGina]

If the girls are going to the Castro District, please remember to leave some flowers in memory of Robin. No, not Kermit's nephew, the comedian.

Is he buried near the Castro district? Will keep that in mind. And...you do know the district I'm talking about, right?

And yes, the forum was down most of the day, probably maintenancy type stuff I'd imagine.

Oh good, cause I was a little worried!

*Has a sneaking suspicion about who that house's being built for.

Shhhhhh!

"scourge up some friends"? Did you mean "scrounge"?

Most likely.

I also made another mistake, which I didn't catch until of course after I can't go back in. Towards the end where Scooter is thinking about seeing Chase, please change the last name from Hargrove to Cosgrove. No clue as to why I just suddenly blanked on the last name of the characters I created.

Movember? Maybe that's the month that comes after Septober up on Mars, telling us it's time for Septoberfest and then Movember Mipmas.

Have you never heard of Movember? It's where men grow moustaches or beards to promote prostate cancer prevention (I think it's prostate cancer). I'd had this idea that Scooter had actually grown a beard (as did some of the others) for the occasion, but it didn't get in the story.

Thankses for the Mupdate, tis always a treat to read your stuff with Scoot and Mandy.

You're welcome as always! I'm going through the last chapters really quickly and then I'll start on the next chapter. I'm thinking a chapter each, one for Scooter and one for Amanda to see what fun things they get taken on!

 

[The Count]

Regarding the corrections, taken care of.

Dunno if Robin's buried in the Castro District of SF, but he did use to live there.
Never been to the district you speak of myself.

Movember as the month of bros growing their beards for prostate cancer, nope, never heard of it.
Movember as the eleventh month of the year as sung by Mobity Mosley here on MCR, yes, I've heard that from time to time.
The tradition I'm more familiar with is bros growing their beards and letting them go unchecked for their respective sports teams' playoff runs.
That, and MLB bringing out the blue bats and blue home run balls for prostate cancer fundraising in June.

*Waits for the next chapter to be posted online.

 

[WebMistressGina]

Alright children! I've been on a roll this weekend, but our time together grows short. I'm back to work tomorrow and not sure where things will be and when I'll get back to this, so for now, here's the last chapter for the night.

Coming Up Next: We spent a few days with the groom and his men as Kermit and company start the bachelor party festivities!



Chapter VIII

March

It was a rather sunny day in March when Piggy got the call, around nine-fifteen in the morning.

Being the girlfriend of such an early riser – Kermit never slept passed 8am if he could help it – meant she was typically up at the same time. Not that she would complain about that; often as a child, she was used to being up right as the sun came over the horizon, though as an adult she wasn’t averse to being up at the crack of dawn any more.

On this day however, she had been waiting for this phone call and it was about time she got it too. Their wedding present to both Scooter and Amanda was cutting it close – a little too close, if you asked her – but it seemed the final preparations were in order and all she had to do was go down and take a look. Which was exactly where she was headed when she passed the frog sitting at their kitchen table, phone in one hand and trying to type on a tablet with the other.

Kermit had done everything he thought of to avoid this move to technology; oh everyone assumed he was completely tech challenged, despite having a girlfriend who lived by anything mobile and an assistant who had formerly worked for Google by his side. It wasn’t that he didn’t like technology, he did! It came in handy when he wanted to talk to his parents and family without running up a long distance phone bill thanks to Skype and Google Hangouts and getting the occasional text from someone was sometimes quicker than trying to call, especially if he was in an area where he wasn’t able to make a phone call.

But with all this technology abound, there were times that Kermit missed those days where he could just talk to people. Trying to talk to Robin these days was an Olympic feat sometimes, the way the young frog seemed to be texting who knew at odds hours of the day and night. He had been a little surprised when neither the teen nor Piggy could name a current prime time show right off the top of their heads, all because they tended to watch Netflix or Hulu – which was surprising because didn’t the latter show current prime time shows? – and even Kermit had to admit his TV watching had usually been the offbeat musical special or the news.

However today, technology was going to be his friend. Even if he had to beat it about its head in order to do so. Fancy smartphone in hand, Kermit had gotten up earlier, took the tablet Scooter had given him for Christmas, and sat down at the kitchen table, where he pretty much remained until Piggy found him. Being named Scooter’s best man had been a true honor and shock that the frog hadn’t seen coming. Whatever he thought the assistant was going to ask him, it certainly wasn’t that, but it didn’t mean that Kermit wasn’t going to do his darnedest to make sure the redhead had the best bachelor party ever.

Anyone else may have had a hard time trying to pick something for their little groomsmen group to do. Scooter was hardly the type to frequent or even want to head to the traditional strip club nor was he the type that would want some debaucherous night on the town that may or may not end with no one remembering what had happened. And to his unspoken credit, Kermit did feel a little bit like the parent, making sure that while this was going to be fun, it was going to be tasteful fun.

And so, probably against his better judgement, he asked the other members of the groomsmen for ideas. Fozzie had been the first person he called, knowing he and Scooter spent time together, especially when the boy was younger; it had been his idea that they should head out to Yosemite National Park, because it was there. It was a great idea, especially when none of them had actually been to Yosemite, despite their living in California for decades. Next, he called Floyd, who was the co-best man if you asked Pepper. He knew Floyd was joking, though Kermit did wonder why Scooter hadn’t asked the bassist to be his best man in the first place.

He knew Scooter and Floyd had formed a brotherly relationship, with Floyd often times taking his role as older brother to Scooter’s baby brother seriously, especially in terms of embarrassment and teasing. Floyd actually had the only alcohol related item on their itinerary and that was wine tasting down in Santa Barbara, again an event that none of them had done, despite being surrounded by several wine countries.

Gonzo of course went with maniac’s advocate and suggested they go parasailing or hang gliding, both which could be done at the popular Elings Park, which also held BMX and RC car racing. And it just happened to be near where Floyd wanted to go wine tasting. Kermit was pretty sure he had gotten set up on that somehow.

Kermit’s contribution was going to be the California Railroad Museum. While most people assumed that Scooter was all tech, all the time, that wasn’t necessarily the case; Scooter was still very much a kid at heart and one thing he loved were trains. It hadn’t escaped Kermit’s notice the way the young redhead had hung around that active train station they had done a show taping at. Real life imitated work that week, when the theater did have to undergo renovations and an inspection (though for the show, they just said it was a fumigation), which just happened the week they had planned on having Loretta Lynn as their guest star.

As soon as Fozzie and Gonzo had suggested having it out of the way – out of the way being a train station, which Gonzo failed to mention was actually live and not abandoned like he promised – Scooter had piped up that he would get everything ready, surprising even Kermit with his enthusiasm on the project. When they had finished taping, he and Rowlf the Dog had found the kid standing near the tracks and just looking out yonder down the rail.

That started a fifteen-minute conversation in which Scooter noted the history of that particular station, along with interesting train facts about California, the railroad, and more.

It was the reason Rowlf had gotten him a train set for Christmas that year.

It was certainly shaping up to a be a very fun, but a very long bachelor party, one that they couldn’t possibly try to undertake in just one night. And that had Kermit thinking – they were on hiatus until April, so if they had wanted to make this a bachelor party weekend, sorta, they could. But Kermit didn’t want to just leave after wine tasting and parasailing – even that sentence boded horrible images of…well, just horrible things – he wanted to end the day on something fun.

That’s where the tablet came in and why he was on the phone with Gonzo, of all people. He wanted to make sure Gonzo was in the process of making his plans for Elings Park, though he completely understood that they would need an actual day to do this, all the while the frog sat trying to figure out what they could leave on a high note with. He was looking in Santa Barbara, only because that was where they would be coming from when they left. Unless of course Kermit reversed their course and that was where they started…

“Something must be wrong for you to be on the phone and a tablet at the same time.”

Looking up, Kermit was a bit surprised to see Piggy dressed and heading out. He opened his mouth to ask where exactly she was going, when Gonzo’s odd statement stopped him and he turned his attention back to the phone. “Gonzo, we are not grave robbing! Why would you even suggest that?” Obviously the weirdo had expected to be rebuffed because his next comment had the frog taking a deep breath of calm.

“Gonzo,” he stressed. “I don’t care what you do in your spare time, but we are not helping you create anything brought back from the dead. I mean it, Gonzo. If the police come looking for you, I will turn on you. I know where you live!” Hanging up, but expecting some witty retort via text, Kermit turned his attention back to his girlfriend.

“What did you say earlier?” he asked. “And why are you all dressed and ready to go?”

“Because firstly, Mon Cher, there are laws about clothing and clothing optional places, which is where Moi is not going,” she said, leaning towards him. “Unless vous has any plans for the day.”

“First Gonzo and now you,” he huffed, turning back to his tablet. “I’m surrounded by lunatics.”

“That may be,” she agreed. “As for where I am going, Moi is going to check out our wedding present.”

That got his attention.

“It’s done?”

“Apparently,” she said. “I’m heading over there now to make sure everything is where it should be.”

“No mistakes on this,” he replied, seriously. “This…this has to be perfect.”

“Relax dearheart,” she cooed, cupping his cheek in her hand. “Moi knows these guys and more importantly, they know Moi. It had better be perfect or there will be consequences, I assure you. Now, what has you in such a tizzy? Other than Gonzo getting arrested for grave robbing.”

“Scooter’s bachelor party.”

“A wild time had by all?” she asked, raising a slim eyebrow. While she knew Kermit would probably never go for the traditional boys’ night out, it didn’t mean he wouldn’t do so to make his friends’ happy, especially when one of those friends was getting married in a few weeks.

He threw her a glare, stating, “Really?” There were times when her jealousy wasn’t warranted. “It has come to my attention that the things we’ve got planned is going to take more than just a day, though I guess we could fit everything in to one, but…ugh. And to top it off, I don’t have a grand finale. See?”

Turning the tablet so that she could glance at it, he pointed out their stops to her before frowning. “Maybe I should leave the railroad museum for last,” he murmured.

“Or…” she said, pulling up the tablet’s browser and typing in an address. Once the page loaded, she pointed to the logo. “You could go there.”

Looking between her and the tablet, Kermit wasn’t sure he got it. What did an amusement park have to do with anything? “Really?” she asked. “You’ve never seen his little ship or the land walker thing in his office? He paid three hundred dollars for that ship alone!”

The dawn of realization suddenly entered Kermit’s brain. “Oh yeah,” he whispered. “He went on for weeks about Doctor Who.”

“He’s financing that, I’m sure.”

Letting out a happy sigh, Kermit turned and kissed her, creating a smack sound when he released her. “Miss Piggy, you are a genius.”

“I know this,” she said, her voice wavering slightly. Although rare, sometimes her captain managed to catch her off guard and surprise her.

[hr]

It was March.

And the stress of planning a wedding had finally snuck up and jumped the future Mr. and Mrs. Grosse.

It was their faults, they knew. They had been lulled into a false sense of security, with how everything was going so far. They had found everything they had needed for their wedding – the Electric Mayhem was taking care of the music for the reception and Rowlf had volunteered to be their pianist during the ceremony; Piggy had of course come through with not only a florist but caterers; Scooter had found a minister, who had in turned offered up a venue that he had performed for several times.

They had even gotten fittings for their wedding wear, Piggy once again coming through as though it would have been obvious who she would’ve gotten to handle the dress. Thoreau had been presented with a golden opportunity really – he had never done a full wedding attire – and he had proclaimed both Scooter and Amanda to be his muses and when he presented them with their looks, the fashion designer had hailed them as his masterpiece. And once Scooter and Amanda had been fitted, it was up to the two of them to get their wedding party into the little shop in order to get their fittings.

Except for one little thing.

While Amanda had gotten Scottie to be her Man of Honor, as he coined it, and she had managed to nervously ask Piggy to be one of her bridesmaids, Mandy had two of her friends from college set to round out the other spots, making it an even eight between the two of them. However, two weeks before their wedding, both women had called to cancel – one had a husband moving out of country for his military job and the other getting into an accident that had her laid up with two broken legs.

To make matters worse, the venue they booked had a massive pipe burst that ended up flooding the entire building.

And that – the two weeks before their wedding – is when the stress they had so cleverly avoided until now, jumped them from behind and started beating them with wedding invitations. Amanda now frantically tried reaching anyone she could – friends, friends of friends, friends of friends neighbors – that she knew and liked to help fill in her in two empty bridesmaids slots. When she couldn’t get people she knew and liked, she just went with people she liked, and then people she knew. After about two hours of that, she had spiraled into typing up a post for Craigslist, hoping that she wasn’t setting a serial murderer in the midst of a hundred people.

Scooter meanwhile was trying to frantically find another church, cathedral, sandbox, McDonald’s Playland that would allow them to hold a wedding, only to be told it was booked for whatever reason.

That was the scene in which Scottie Coulter walked in to. He had arrived a few days earlier and was staying in a nearby hotel, but he had been on hand for anything that his best girl and her lover boy needed and on that night, it seemed they both needed him.

Now, Scottie knew how to handle a distressed Amanda Cosgrove; that was the easy part. He didn’t however know how to handle an obviously distressed Scooter Grosse, who was at that moment strangling his smartphone and probably imagining it was whomever he had just gotten off the phone with. And while Scottie didn’t know how to handle an angry Scooter Grosse, he did know who could.

“Vote for Piggy.”

“Diva, we have a situation bigger than any room in the White House,” Scottie began, trying to console the redhead in his arms.

“What’s the damage?”

“We’re short two bridesmaids and a venue.”

The diva made a very unladylike comment before she said, “I’m on it” and hung up.

Scottie hadn’t known Miss Piggy for very long – at least in person. He had always been a fan, of course – but what he did know was that she could whip up anything faster than a chef could whip cream. After meeting her from his last visit, the two had kept in touch, literally becoming text buddies and Twitter pals, sending out random texts or tweets when the mood took them and always replying back to anything that was worth it (which was most).

He had been thrilled to learn that Piggy would be a member of their bridal party, knowing that his plans for the bachelorette party would increase tenfold if the Divine Miss P was there to enjoy it with them. He couldn’t tell Amanda his plans, even if they would potentially cheer her up at the moment, instead he told her all the gossip he knew about their theater troupe, as well as the interesting tidbits he learned when he had gone to see another friend, who happened to work backstage on Broadway.

Not an hour later, his phone beeped, alerting him that he had a text message waiting for him.

Divine Miss P: Bridesmaids all set – Lady J and Cami. Venue taken care of.

He nodded his head at the message and showed it to Mandy, just as Scooter was answering his phone and saying, “Wait, you wanna do what?” The two sat and watched as the stage manager paced in front of them, listening intently to whomever was on the other end of his conversation.

“Yeah, but…” he began, before sighing. “I guess. It’s just…it’s really short notice, Kermit…”

Amanda and Scottie turned to glance at each other before turning back towards the scene in front of them.

Scottie 2 Hottie: Intense convo with the frog. Venue?

Divine Miss P: Covered, but the frog’s trying to convince the boy.

Scottie 2 Hottie: Where exactly did you get in less than an hour?

Divine Miss P: A diva can’t reveal all her secrets!

“Okay Kermit,” Scooter replied. “I trust you, you know I do. When can I see it? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, alright. Yeah, thanks. Bye.”

“So what’s the word?” the blonde asked, trying to keep his excitement and curiosity down to a minimal.

“The word,” the redhead began before taking joining the two at the kitchen table. “Is mum, which is to say that Kermit told me not to worry about it, cause they would find a place. Or rather, they had a place, they just needed to fix it up.”

“Fix it up?” Mandy asked. “Fix what up?”

“That’s what I’m afraid of.”

“Hey, come on now,” Scottie said, patting the page on the hand. “It’s you, so I know they won’t let you down. They probably found something awesome and just need to make even more so.”

“Yeah,” Scooter sighed, before looking at his intended. “How about you?”

“Good news all around,” she said, sniffing a little. “Piggy managed to get Janice and Camilla to fill the two bridesmaids spots. I totally owe her and them for this. I hope they don’t mind.”

Scooter smirked at that. “Please,” he said. “The Axis of Evil are able to fulfill their plans – they got me married to you and they get to be in the wedding.”

“How does one join this Axis of Evil?” Scottie asked, now fully intrigued. “Cause it sounds delightful and I want in.”

 

[The Count]

Okay... Time to employ the sandwich method.

Something I liked:
Posted by the Webby G: "However today, technology was going to be his friend. Even if he had to beat it about its head in order to do so."
You show that tablet who's boss Kerm.

Something I didn't like:
Posted by Gina of the Webs: "It hadn’t escaped Kermit’s notice the way the young redhead had hung around that active train station they had done a show taping at. Real life imitated work that week, when the theater did have to undergo renovations and an inspection (though for the show, they just said it was a fumigation), which just happened the week they had planned on having Loretta Lynn as their host."
Ah, you still have yet to learn grasshopper... Kermit is the host, he is always the host. Celebrities are guest stars. Other people make this same mistake sometimes as well.

Something I liked, something I liked...
The fact that Scottie and Piggy are thick as thieves working together on surprising both members of the happy couple to be.

Glad I'm not the only one who remembers McDonald's Playland, those things are dead and no longer exist after the H&R Puffenstuff lawsuit. *sniff.'The rest of the chapter was fun to read and I enjoyed every last bit. Thanks once again for posting.

 

[WebMistressGina]

Okay... Time to employ the sandwich method.

Hey! I'm eating a sandwich!

Something I liked:

Posted by the Webby G: "However today, technology was going to be his friend. Even if he had to beat it about its head in order to do so."

You show that tablet who's boss Kerm.

I know we all pick on little Kermit about his lack of tech skills, but he's trying! He totally is, he just misses the days of non-tech. Did you know, Counters, that my (our, I wouldn't presume to guess the age of our wisened one) generation is the last to know what it was before and after technology?

Something I didn't like:

Ah, you still have yet to learn grasshopper... Kermit is the host, he is always the host. Celebrities are guest stars. Other people make this same mistake sometimes as well.

Blah, yes I did know this Please to change host to guest star for Miss Lynn.

Something I liked, something I liked...
The fact that Scottie and Piggy are thick as thieves working together on surprising both members of the happy couple to be.

I did like how they were working together in 3 Ball and in trying to think up Maids of Honor and bridesmaids, I of course remembered Mr. Coulter.

Glad I'm not the only one who remembers McDonald's Playland, those things are dead and no longer exist after the H&R Puffenstuff lawsuit. *sniff.'The rest of the chapter was fun to read and I enjoyed every last bit. Thanks once again for posting.

? What lawsuit? And we have Playland's here. They're much bigger now and filled with nosier toys, but our Mickey D's have Playlands (as do most of our fast food giants). Sadly, I am too tall to go into Playland, despite my short stature.

I hope later tonight I get started on our bachelor party chapter, if not expect it this week or weekend

 

[The Count]

Ju don't know about the lawsuits? !

Drtooth and D'Snowth can probably cite you chapter and verse on this, but essentially it boils down to this... You probably know the core McDonaldLand characters: Ronald McDonald, Grimace, Early Birdie, The Hamburglar. Then came the Fry Kids, Professor Egg McMuffin, Capn' Filet O' Fish, and The McNugget Buddies. And there were the Muppet-looking hamburger, milkshake, and bag of fries Happy Meal trio. Well, the estate of Sid and Marty Croft, responsible for H&R Puffenstuff sued because they saw McDonald's as ripping off their characters. And they won. And that's why no more McDonaldLand.

Oh, and don't let Uncle Deadly overhear that Gonzo's been graverobbing. Might end up with electric charred weirdo on the menu again.

 

[WebMistressGina]

Hey kids! We're coming into the long stretch here and when I mean long, I mean long! The next few chapters are gonna cover both Scooter and Amanda's bachelor/bachelorette parties, so expect some long chapters.

The end of course will lead us to a big ole wedding and hopefully, answers to some questions some of you are asking, right? Like what's this big surprise Kermit and Piggy have for Scooter? Where exactly is this wedding taking place?

But for now, we're gonna go with Scooter as he gets Muppet-napped in this first part of our chapter.




Chapter IX

Five days before I do

Saturday, March 15th was the last weekend that Scooter Grosse was a single man.

In five days, Scooter would be standing in front of friends and family in order to marry his girlfriend and now fiancée. While his upcoming nuptials were definitely a thing to look forward to, however there was something wrong with this idyllic image – he had no church.

Due to a pipe bursting, their original venue had completely flooded, two weeks before their wedding and leaving the happy couple to be utterly devastated; but apparently, there was a silver lining that had come through, thanks to Scooter’s best man. The problem of course was that Scooter had no idea where or what this new change of venue was and to be honest, it was freaking the poor boy out.

That was, until his phone rang at six o’clock on a Saturday morning, waking both him and his fiancée. “Lo?”

“Scooter!” cried a voice, that he thought sounded like Gonzo. “Hey buddy, you awake?”

“No.”

“Well, wake up, sleepy head! You gotta get down to the royals’ house by at least 7:30am, okay?”

“Kay.”

He hung up and then he went back to sleep.

His phone then rang about thirty minutes later, waking him up again, however his brain was nearly halfway there with the way Mandy was snuggling in his arms. “Who is that?” she mumbled, burrowing closer to his warmth.

“Someone I’m going to unfriend in about two seconds,” he grumbled, grabbing his phone and answering it. “What?”

“Well good morning to you, too, sunshine,” came a chuckle, a familiar one that he thought sounded like Floyd Pepper. “You still in bed? Get your tail down here or we’re coming to get you.”

“Get my tail where?”

“Didn’t Gonzo call you?” the bassist asked. “We’re over at Boss Frog and Boss Hog’s and our party train cannot leave without you, baby, so come on. Get on up!”

“Floyd…” Scooter whined, sitting up slightly before looking at the time on his phone. He was indeed speaking to Floyd Pepper and it was indeed 6:45 in the morning. “It’s 6:45, man! On a Saturday. Why on Earth would I be up now?”

“Oh I can think of a few good reasons.”

And Scooter could literally see the fellow redhead’s eyebrows waggle at the suggestion.

“And what do you mean you’re coming to get me?” the page asked.

“Just what I said,” Floyd repeated. “Be here in the next thirty, Red, or we are bringing the party to you. You get me?”

That…sounded ominous. Very ominous actually, as Scooter wasn’t exactly sure what was going on and why he needed to be at Kermit and Piggy’s so early in the morning. Yes, he and Kermit would usually meet over the weekends for breakfast, but at decent times, like 8 or 9 in the morning; certainly not at 7:30 and never had he been summoned to head over without having an idea first of what it was about.

“Yeah,” he whispered. “Yeah, Floyd, I got ya. I’m…I’m getting dressed right now. I’ll see you in a bit.”

“What was that?” Amanda asked, a little more awake after hearing the one sided conversation.

“I…I don’t know,” he said, turning to look at her. “It’s a little disconcerting though, I have no idea what Kermit or anyone wants with me at 7:30 in the morning.”

Still wondering what exactly was going on, Scooter did as he was told and got ready for the day, however his morning only continued to get more bizarre when Amanda called to him that he had gotten a text from Fozzie that told him to pack for the next few days, something that his wonderful fiancée was happy to help him while he finished up his morning routine.

Showered, dressed, packed, and more confused than ever, he kissed his fiancée goodbye with a note that he would call her later, once he discovered what the heck was going on. The drive to The Frogs took less than ten minutes from his townhome in MidCity, which was good for Scooter, as he managed to make it to the Beverly Hills home before the 7:30am cut off he’d been given.

Pulling into the driveway, he was surprised at seeing Fozzie’s classic Studebaker already there, apparently beating him over to the house. Why Fozzie Bear was at the house so early in the morning, the redhead had no idea, but he couldn’t help but have his curiosity piqued once again. Not bothering to knock – he had a key after all – the page walked through the front door and was surprised to see a group of people sitting in the kitchen and enjoying their morning cups of coffee.

“Hey!” Gonzo cried, seeing the redhead walk in. “About time you got here, Red. Cutting it pretty close, aren’t you?”

“What the heck is the going on?” Scooter asked, looking at everyone.

To see Kermit and Piggy up was one thing, but to have Fozzie, Gonzo, and Floyd there – especially at this time on a Saturday – was totally and completely unheard of. “We’ve been waiting for you,” Kermit said, standing and patting his young friend on the arm.

“Waiting for me?”

“We’re here to start your bachelor party,” Kermit continued.

“My what?”

The frog rolled his eyes – actually rolled his eyes! – at the page. “As your best man, it’s my duty to make sure you spend the last free days as a bachelor having fun.”

Hearing someone clear their throats, he amended his last statement with, “Not that marrying Amanda won’t be fun, because I’m sure it will be, I’m just saying a man needs to remember what it’s like not having…”

Again, the throat cleared itself.

“But of course,” Kermit backtracked. “I wouldn’t presume to think that you would rather be single than getting married, I’m just saying that as your best man, I want to make sure that you do everything you can before your wedding…”

The throat cleared itself, for a third time.

“Because your wedding day is going to be stressful…”

And for a fourth time.

“Will you stop doing that!?” Kermit exclaimed, turning to glare at the pig who dared to ruin his perfectly fine and well-arranged speech for the day.

“What the frog is trying to say is, we’re taking you places and it’s gonna take five days to do it,” Gonzo condensed.

“This is a five-day bachelor party?” Scooter questioned, looking worriedly at Piggy. Certainly, they wouldn’t be doing anything unbecoming for five days and if they were, surely Piggy would do something to stop them.

Right?

“Right on, little brother,” Floyd piped up, clapping a hand on the redhead’s shoulder. “Five days, with five of us.”

Panic stricken, Scooter turned to the one sane person that seemed to be left here. “Piggy, am I being kidnapped?”

“I’m afraid so, dearest.”

“I think I’m scared.”

In any normal situation, Scooter would not have been worried about spending the day with the other four. However, being woken up at six o’clock in the morning, on a Saturday no less, and then being told that this was just the start to his bachelor party, which would take five days was intimidating. And worrying. What exactly was he supposed to tell Amanda?

“As you should be,” the diva nodded, though in sympathy. “Gonzo’s going with you, so you know your life is going to be in danger for most of the trip. And then there’s Pepper, but ultimately…yeah, you should probably be worried. I’m worried for you.”

“And on that note,” Kermit replied. “We should probably take off. We got a long drive ahead of us.”

That did nothing to alleviate the sense of doom that went through Scooter’s mind, as the group headed outside. The reason for Fozzie to be there was made clear, as it looked as though his Studebaker would be their mode of transportation to where ever the heck these guys were taking him. “Come on, kid,” Floyd replied, opening the trunk of the car, revealing everyone’s bags lie inside. “Throw your bag in and we’re blowing this popsicle stand.”

“You have such a way with words, Floyd,” Piggy deadpanned, earning her a knowing chuckle from the bassist. Kermit only shook his head; he would never in his life understand some of the friendships his girl had with the others and perhaps, in a way, it was better that he didn’t understand.

“You and Robin gonna be okay while I’m gone?”

“The two of us will somehow manage without your guidance, I’m sure,” the diva huffed. She and Robin would be left in the house for three days before Piggy would be leaving to celebrate Amanda’s last days as a single woman, as Scottie planned on taking the bride and her bridesmaids to see the sights, sounds, and everything else is San Francisco.

“When you leaving?” he asked.

“Tuesday morning,” she replied, walking him out to the car. “And before you ask, “Moi will have Robin ready for school and out the door before we leave. Rowlfie is picking him after school and they’ll arrive together for the wedding.”

“I’ve never doubted you, darlin’,” he said, delivering a kiss to her cheek. “I’ll bring you back something nice.”

“You’d better.”

“Hey, you’re the one going to San Francisco,” he retorted.

Leaning in closer, she whispered, “Then I’ll make sure to bring back something we’ll both enjoy.”

When she was whispering like that and look like that at, it took everything Kermit had not to cancel this trip or tell the others to just go without him. But, he was best man after all and it was his duty. “You’d better,” he said, delivering a more lingering kiss that caused those seated in the back – namely Floyd and Gonzo – to start cat calling.

Piggy watched as Kermit slid into the passenger seat, closing the door behind him. Not one for just letting her frog leave and certainly not with her favorite redhead, Piggy leaned through the passenger side window to address those in the car. Fozzie had of course taken his customary position behind the wheel, saying once that no one knew this car better than he did (for obvious reasons); Scooter sat in the back with Gonzo and Floyd on either side of him and a slight look of terror on his face.

“Now Moi is entrusting you boys to bring our little Andrew back, safe and sound, and no worse for ware,” she stated. “No exceptions.”

“Except me, right?” piped up Gonzo.

“You’re always an exception, Gonzo,” she retorted.

“I assure you, Piggy, we will bring Scooter back in time for the wedding,” Kermit soothed. “Completely safe.”

“And I can get the same promise from you, right?” Scooter asked, moving forward so he could look Piggy in the eye. While he hadn’t known about his bachelor party, Scooter certainly knew about Amanda’s or at least that Scottie was planning something that involved him, her, Piggy, Janice, and Camilla and it wasn’t taking place in town.

“Vous has Moi’s solid oath that no harm shall befall the bride before your nuptials.”

“Right, well…” he said, sitting. “I guess that’s something.”

“Moi will see you Thursday, Mon Capitan.”

“Do stay out of trouble.”

Smirking, the diva asked, “Where’s the fun in that?”

[hr]

Fozzie took the Studebaker from the driveway of the posh Beverly Hills home on to Wilshire Boulevard, before hitting the I-405 N. The radio was on some classic oldies station, though it was low so the others could talk to each other; it was at this point that Scooter couldn’t take it any longer. “Alright,” he sighed. “What the heck is going on? Where are you taking me? Am I going to survive this?”

“What this is is your bachelor party,” Gonzo answered. “Where we’re taking you is a surprise and will you survive? Possibly.”

“Gonzo,” Kermit admonished, turning in his seat to look at his stage manager. “Scooter, do you trust me?”

“Of course I do, Kermit.”

“Then trust me to handle your bachelor party, buddy,” the frog said, soothingly. “We aren’t headed to Vegas and there’s nothing…scandalous that’s taking place.”

“Says you,” Gonzo pouted.

“Ignore Gonzo,” Kermit said, though he did have a smile on his face. “Trust me, trust us to know how you would want to spend five days away from your future wife. We’re gonna have a fun time, I promise.”

Scooter had the grace to blush in embarrassment. Even with Gonzo’s questionable comments, which were usually done in jest, he knew the guys were never do anything that would make him uncomfortable – well, not dangerously so – and whatever they had planned had been done out of love and friendship.

He nodded, a small smile gracing his face. “I’d probably be a little more sympathetic if I had some food in me,” he joked. “Seeing as someone woke me up at the crack of dawn and didn’t bother to feed me or give me coffee.”

Wrapping an arm his neck, Floyd cried out, “Get this boy to a Denny’s! Stat!”

“He’s not looking good, Doctor,” Gonzo added, scrunching the page’s face in his hand. “He almost looks…oh, it’s horrible! He’s decaffeinated!”

“Get off me!” Scooter cried, though he couldn’t stop laughing with the way Floyd was giving him a noogie and Gonzo’s constant poking at him in the side.

“He’s not gonna make it, Captain!” Gonzo exclaimed, taking on a horrible Scottish accent. “He can’t take any more!”

“Fozzie,” Kermit said, addressing the driver and barely holding in his own chuckles. “Let’s stop somewhere quick so the kid can get some coffee in his system.”

“Aye aye, Kermit!”


[hr]


Road trips were always fun when traveling with the Muppets, regardless of the Muppets in the car. Fozzie Bear especially loved road trips, as it meant hanging out with the people you loved and cared for; the others weren’t so excited, as it meant spending hours in a car with several others which could amount to a murder car should anything get out of hand. Luckily, this was not that car.

Scooter had to admit that he actually hadn’t been on any car trips with the others as they had with each other. Fozzie routinely took the long stretch of highway to New York when his mother was still alive and Kermit, always feeling horrible at letting his best friend drive for days on end, always went with him, citing he wanted to see his family in Mississippi. Even Gonzo, who had made a living as a pseudo travelling plumber, was used to driving long hours and day; Floyd, as a member of the Electric Mayhem, was usually on the road with the rest of the band, spending an inordinate amount of time with each and every one of them.

Where ever there were headed apparently was going to take hours to get there. After hitting the I-405, Fozzie got off on the I-5 headed to Sacramento; Scooter didn’t know this, as he managed to snuggle down and dozed after about two hours after he had gotten breakfast and coffee. The redhead normally wasn’t one to take naps, but the stress of losing their venue, Amanda’s issues with her disappearing bridesmaids, and just the overall sense of the impending wedding, took the kid out without his realizing it.

“Is he asleep?”

“Kid nodded off somewhere during our talk about digital music,” Floyd chuckled, patting the younger Muppet on the head.

“This’ll be good for him,” Gonzo murmured, flipping a page in the book he was reading and running a finger under the bridge of the glasses he was wearing. “He’s too worried about this wedding.”

“Hey yeah, Jani told me about the wash out with the church,” Floyd said, glancing at the redhead to make sure he was definitely asleep, but to be on the safe side, he scooted closer to the front seat. “We all set on that?”

Kermit also gave Scooter a look, before saying, “It’s all set. Rowlf and Robin will keep everything on track while we’re gone, but…it should work out. Scooter and Amanda won’t have to worry about a thing.” Looking at the three, Kermit whispered, “Thanks, by the way, if I haven’t said it. This’ll mean the world to them.”

“We couldn’t let Scooter not get married!” Fozzie whispered, shocked that his frog would even think such a thing.

“Besides,” Gonzo piped up. “Could you think of a better place to do it? On short notice, too.”

“It’s still a good wedding present.”

The other three chuckled. “Please,” Gonzo said. “Paying for the wedding is his wedding present. Providing the setting is just cause he’s Scooter.”


[hr]


“Scooter? Hey buddy, time to wake up. We’re almost there.”

A little under six hours and Fozzie was only a few miles from their first stop, which was great for everyone in the car as it hit right about the time for eating and bathroom breaks. Waking up proved that Scooter had not been dreaming about being called at six in the morning, nor had it been a nightmare that he was apparently being kidnapped by four people he trusted.

And it also proved that they were not in the city he expected them to be.

“Where are we?” he asked, groggily, looking at the windows to try and get his bearings.

“Mr. Grosse,” Kermit announced. “Welcome to Sacramento.”

“Sacramento?” the assistant asked. “Why are we in Sacramento?”

“We’re here to eat and use the little bear’s room,” Fozzie replied.

“No,” Kermit said, throwing a look to the driver, even as he turned off 2nd Street into the parking lot of an obvious eatery. “Your surprise is actually up the street…”

“But Kermit!” Fozzie whined, bouncing slightly in his seat.

“Aw, let the bear answer the call of nature,” Floyd replied, opening his door to get out. “We’ve been in here tighter than sardines, man’s gotta stretch his legs you know.”

“Alright, alright,” the frog said, opening his own door. “Gonzo, what time is it?”

“We made good time,” the weirdo replied. “It’s a little before 1:30pm.”

“Excellent!” the frog nodded. “We still have time then.”

“Time for what?” asked Scooter, also getting out of the car and looking around. He had never been to Sacramento before, most of his dealings were usually within LA or Hollywood, so it was interesting to view everything around him and hopefully get an idea of what exactly the four had planned for him.

Fozzie had stopped off at the area known as Old Town Sacramento, which looked like a little shopping area, complete with eateries and shopping centers. They had apparently parked across the street from the Pony Express Museum and Scooter vaguely remembered passing a visitor center before they parked. The area, something that definitely looked to be a great exploring expedition, was something he’d had to remember to bring Amanda to, if just to check out the Pony Express Museum.

“You alright?”

Scooter, still waking up, had elected to stay outside by the car and try to get his bearings. Kermit had decided to stay as well, while the others quickly took a quick restroom break. It was Kermit appearing at his side to ask his question.

“I think so,” the redhead chuckled. “I mean, it’s not every day you get kidnapped by your friends.”

“Hey!” Kermit said, nudging Scooter. “We called. Twice in fact. And you can’t be kidnapped if you willingly come along. Remember that.”

The two continued their joking until the other members of the party returned, signaling the group to head back into the car. It didn’t take long before Fozzie was once again pulling into a parking spot, this time in front of a series of large structures. It was only when the group got out of the car, that Scooter was able to see the sign. “The California State Railroad Museum?” he read, turning wide and excited eyes on his so-called captors.

Kermit smiled at him. “We figured you had to go at least once,” he said.

Scooter couldn’t help but smile before taking off for the door.


[hr]


Four hours spent at a railroad may not have been everyone’s ideal afternoon, but Scooter Grosse loved it. He didn’t even think anyone remembered that whole train station incident, despite how Miss Lynn had been so gracious as to be a guest star in a show that was filming at a train station. Truth be told, his love of trains had been his secret obsession; everyone had pretty much known he loved comic books and sci-fi, but this was just one of those things he kept to himself, just in case they thought he couldn’t get any nerdier than he was now.

But here he was, day one of this grand bachelor party arranged by his best man, at one of the largest and beloved railroad museums in the entire state, consisting of six buildings including the railroad history museum. They had several different trains, including a few that you could actually go within, however that wasn’t the highlight of the trip.

The highlight came at two o’clock, when Kermit announced they had a train to catch.

The Sacramento Southern Railroad was the tour de France for the museum; train rides on closed coach cars, gondolas, and an observation car were all pulled by an actual steam locomotive that went down the train tracks near the museum. Kermit went all out, getting the first class observation car, which departed at 2pm. None of them had actually been on a train before, so the experience was just as exciting for the others as it was for Scooter; the scenery of the Sacramento River was breathtaking and he took as many photo ops as he could.

The entire ride took forty-five minutes, but it had been a great experience, riding the first class car known as the El Dorado, a 1920s lounge car with large windows that they had been staring out at while they rode along. As they always say, time flies when having fun, and it seemed like the afternoon went flying by until it was closing time. The call of dinner was high, so the group headed back down the street to the River City Saloon, a classic old west bar that seemed to be lively on a Saturday night.

Fozzie volunteered to the designated driver, which allowed the other four to actually try what was on tap and the special drinks the bar took pride in selling. The bar actually suited Floyd more than anyone, he being more of a whisker drinker than anyone in the group or even in the Muppets in general, but never let it be said Gonzo turned down a challenge and before long, the two were engaged in a Fireball Whiskey drink off.

Dinner was a fun affair and it reminded Scooter that it had been so very long since he had a night like this, one where he was just hanging out with his friends. It wasn’t to say that they never got together, but when you had a troupe of hundreds, it was hard to set time aside for a slight few, what with the scheduling of the show and the work that went on when they had a movie going. And yes, Scooter saw these people just about every day, but that was for work.

This…was for fun.

For a very long time, he had been ‘the kid’ – heck, he still was called the kid – but he was grown up now, no longer the awkward teenager everyone still remembered him as. He was a successful businessman, a technology speaker, and in four days, he was going to be a married man. Even he couldn’t believe that last one.

Their night ended at the Vagabond Inn, a nearby hotel that offered coffee in the room, which was the last thing Scooter appreciated until his head hit the pillow.

 

[WebMistressGina]

Hey Muppet Babies!

Here is our second very long, continuation of our current chapter! Hopefully I'll actually be able to finish this chap this week (fingers crossed).

Once this is over, we'll circle back and see what Mandy, Scottie 2 Hottie, the Divine Miss P, Lady J, and the Queen of Cluck got up to in San Fran!

This continues after the last section.



Three days before I do

Day three of Scooter’s bachelor party bonanza started equally as early as his first day did, however this time he was actually prepared the early wake up call.

The day before, they had checked out of their inn in Sacramento and headed up to Yosemite National Park. That had been Fozzie’s suggestion, as he tended to have an appreciation for the wild outdoors, calming winds, and scenic views nature afforded someone. Coming in from the south, Fozzie had expertly driven to the heart of the park, that of Yosemite Valley. Once again, his best man had gone out, getting them rooms at the Yosemite Lodge, which offered their guests scenic views of the surrounding waterfalls.

Day two had been spent enjoying the majesty of the park and everything in it - they had taken one of the lodge’s tours, getting an overview of the area they were in. After that, they had decided to take a short hike just to see the trees, the mountains, the waterfalls, and everything around them. Stopping at the popular El Capitan mountains, the guys had insisted Kermit take a picture after his apparent namesake, with Scooter sending a quick text to Piggy to show that they had name a mountain after their illustrious leader.

That Sunday was also the first day that Scooter had been able to actively speak to Amanda. While he had texted her that he was fine and the guys hadn’t taken him on some wild ride through the state, he hadn’t been able to actively speak with her. Saturday were always one of the busiest days at the pool hall and despite her upcoming nuptials, the Whatnot wanted to make sure she had everything in order before going on her honeymoon.

He hadn’t realized just how much he missed her until he heard her voice come over his phone.

“Do you realize this is the longest we’ve spent away from each other?” he sighed.

“I had been thinking the same thing,” she admitted. “I wasn’t going to mention it though.”

“Oh?”

“Well, I didn’t want you to think your wife was the clingy sort.”

“Mandy, you can cling to me all you want,” he breathed, his voice dropping slightly into a purr.

“Careful, Mr. Grosse,” she cooed. “I know where you are and I’ll be headed in your direction in a few days. Don’t think I won’t kidnap you myself.”

That actually didn’t sound like a bad idea.

They talked for a long time that night, with Scooter telling her of their trip to the railroad museum and their hike through Yosemite, while she told him of work and what she thought Scottie might be up to. Like Scooter, Amanda had no idea where in San Francisco Scottie was taking them, only that he had places in mind that would excite and thrill her – his words, too! It didn’t help matters that Piggy and the others seemed to be in on this and a few other things that she couldn’t put her finger on.

It was thrilling and exciting and unnerving to be honest.

Day three started a little before six am, something that none of them wanted to be up for. The only person who seemed mildly awake was Kermit, making him the official driver of the morning, as Fozzie was definitely in the camp of ‘want to go back to sleep’. The earliness of the morning signaled another five hour driving day, apparently back down towards home, this time to Santa Barbara. The group had been to the area before, though on short little tours or trips, so there was a lot to explore and that was what Floyd and Gonzo had apparently been looking for.

It of course never dawned on anyone, at least not until two hours into their trip, that they had allowed Kermit to drive. The frog knew how to drive, had his license and everything, however it didn’t mean he necessarily enjoyed driving; like his live in wife, Kermit liked the ability to focus on other things than driving if he could help it. That’s why he still had 80s Robot around, even if he knew he was putting the poor bot in danger whenever he or Scooter met.

At the two hour driving mark, Gonzo and Scooter were up by then and both had insisted Kermit was going to get them killed or worse, lost, before the former plumber took matters – and the wheel – in his own hands. Thankfully, Fozzie could sleep through nearly anything save a nuclear bomb going off (though there was enough evidence that he could probably sleep through that too), and he would never be aware that both the frog and the weirdo had conspired to kill them all that day.

Day three’s adventure would start at Elings Park, a large activity park situated towards the south end of the state, with an incredible view of the Pacific Ocean as a backdrop. Gonzo had been very tightlipped about what he wanted to do apart from telling Kermit, who had apparently green light whatever crazy stunt the weirdo had wanted. He didn’t want to take up the entire day, as he knew Floyd had his own event planned for later that day, hence why the early morning departure.

A little before 11am, Gonzo drove through the south entrance of the park, pointing out sites as he did so. “Gentlemen,” he began. “Welcome to Elings Park in beautiful Santa Barbara. We’ll be making our departure here on the south end of the park; to your right, you’ll see the horseback riding area.”

“We’re going horseback riding?” Fozzie asked, fearfully. He had never been on a horse before, in fact he didn’t even know any horses outside from the ones he’d seen in New York a few times.

“No,” the weirdo said, a slight smile on his face. “We’re going to the left.” And as soon as he said it, Gonzo was driving off the main road onto a dirt one and headed towards one of the hills.

“Gonzo,” Kermit growled, seeing the change direction. “You promised me this was going to be safe.”

“And it is!” the driver stressed, pulling the car to a stop at a little dirt circle where apparently another group of people were waiting. “Captain, my Captain, I would never deem to get you guys hurt. Besides, can you imagine what Piggy would do to me if I did’t get her precious lamb back to her?”

“I am not Piggy’s lamb!”

“Actually,” Gonzo said, pointing towards the backseat. “I was talking about Scooter.”

“And speaking of Scooter,” said the redhead. “He would like to know what we’re doing here.”

Turning to look at the page as he sat in the backseat, Gonzo grinned at him. “We’re going paragliding.”


[hr]


Paragliding, as it turns out, was not the death defying adventure Scooter thought it would be.

He was still alive and it had actually turned out to be fun. And the fact that even Gonzo hadn’t done it, was a rare act of finding something insane that the weirdo hadn’t done before. The redhead wouldn’t lie and say that his life may have flashed before his eyes after Gonzo told them the reason they were at Elings in the first place.

After all, Kermit had put the green light on it, even with reservations, and thought it could be a fun experiment. And incredibly, it had been a fun experiment; soaring over the Pacific Ocean, watching the people below as they became small moving bits, it was the most incredible thing he had probably ever done. Both Kermit and Fozzie had been adamant on staying on the ground –

“Ma always said that if the good Lord wanted bears to fly, we’d have wings,” the bear defended.

“Does that mean you’ll never go on a plane again?” Pepper asked.

“She said bears had to have the wings,” Fozzie retorted. “That’s a plane.”

“And this is a giant sail,” Gonzo added.

“Completely different.”

“How exactly!?”

“Children…” Kermit admonished.

Which left the other three to try something that they hoped wouldn’t get them killed or at least in Gonzo’s case, slightly maimed. But it had been exhilarating and for an hour, the view had been incredible. A little after lunch, Floyd took the wheel and headed towards the Cheshire Cat, their hotel for the night; the inn itself was patterned after the popular book, Alice in Wonderland, complete with naming conventions for the rooms.

Floyd had booked one of the cottages – the Mobberly – which held two bedrooms, a sitting room, their own kitchen, and outside deck. The romantic setting seemed so out of the way for someone who prided themselves on getting the last sarcastic word in that everyone had to look at him.

“Am I gonna be Uncle Scooter soon?” the fellow redhead asked, causing the bassist chuckle.

“Not this year, baby.”

“Oh, next year then?”

“By next year, I’m hoping to hear someone say ‘Uncle Fozzie’,” the bear said, before sending a look to his best friend. “How about it, Frog?”

“How did this turn on me?” asked said frog. “I’m not the one getting married.”

“That ain’t what I heard,” Gonzo sing-songed.

“Keep your mouth shut, Gonzo.”

“Heard what?” asked Fozzie, looking between the two. “Heard what, Gonzo?”

“I value my tongue, Bear,” the weirdo murmured, though he did shoot him a look that said he knew more than he was telling.

From the Cheshire Cat, the group actually took a cab to their next rondeveau – the Happy Canyon Vineyard. The vineyard was actually the wine tasting environment branch from a much larger ranch that was based in Santa Ynez. This was actually the first stop on what Floyd was calling it the ‘Wedding Winery in Finery’ and he even insisted the guys get dressed for it; nothing too fancy, but polos, slacks, and the occasional jacket were a must if the rest of the day was to progress.

“Daddios,” the musician began, stopping the group before they headed out to their cab. “Today, we’re embarking on a magical journey involving the delicate balance between fruit and drink. Our first stop – the Happy Canyon. Mount up!”

They waited until they were in the cab before the questions began.

“Okay seriously,” Kermit asked. “Mount up?”

“If you tell Miss Hamhocks, we cannot be friends.”

“Honestly, Pepper,” Gonzo asked. “Wine tasting? That doesn’t seem like your style.”

“Hey man, I am the hippest of the hip!” Floyd protested. “You think the hip can’t be sophisticated? Besides, I like wine. And cheese.”

Scooter had wondered why they hadn’t bothered to drive to these places, but it started making sense once they arrived at the Happy Canyon Vineyard. Only a tasting room for the family owned ranch and winery, the group made their way to a table to start. Each getting a glass of the starting red wine, Floyd took the opportunity to make a toast, one that Scooter was almost afraid to hear.

“To our Scooter,” Floyd began. “Who in three days, embarks on a journey that few of us have gone on. No matter how old you get, you’re always gonna be ‘the kid’ to us, but you’ve grown into a man that we’ve all been proud enough to see grow and to call family. We love you, little brother. Salud.”

“Salud!”

“Thank you, guys,” Scooter said, smiling at the bassist. Floyd Pepper wasn’t sentimental, one would think, but he was fiercely loyal to those he considered friends; he had been watching out for Scooter since he had decided the kid looked competent enough to hold and play a bass. For Scooter, outings like this reminded him that he would need to work harder at spending time with these guys.

After their breakup and reunion, things had been on an apparent non-stop roller coaster that had just added another passenger, but if there was anything Scooter had learned during his time away it was that relationships can be easily broken and it was important to make sure he didn’t lose these guys again.

He would always spend time with Kermit and Piggy – that was a given – but he had missed Fozzie, Gonzo, Floyd, Robin, and a host of others due to both his professional and personal lives. As worried as he had been at the start of this trip, Scooter was coming glad he had taken it.


[hr]


Five.

Five wineries, if he remembered correctly and was sober enough to recall.

Scooter wasn’t normally a wine drinker, none of them were really except for the occasion special occasion, but this trip certainly qualified as such. And really, when was the next time they would ever go wine tasting? Actually, seeing some of the vineyards that the tasting rooms were based out of did pop up on the list of places some of the others wanted to go; in fact, Kermit had asked the page to find a way to get to the actual Happy Canyon Vineyard that was located in Santa Ynez, a place that Floyd had difficulties not only finding, but trying to actually get an invitation to get through.

Floyd’s choices of wineries were actually based on what was known as the Urban Wine Trail, the official tour that most would take when making a tour of the Santa Barbara wineries. They didn’t have time for a full time tour, but it was certainly a consideration for them at a later date.

The next stop was the Grassini family vineyards, a family owned winery that offered several of their vineyard’s specialty wines within their tasting rooms. There were three more stops after that, ending at the Kalyra by the Sea, a tasting room that was set up like a tiki bar and was featured in the movie Sideways.

Like any alcohol, the mood was filled with comedy and an overabundance of hugging and heartfelt words. Scooter wasn’t sure if they were all practicing their speeches for the wedding just to see how they sounded beforehand, but it was the most the five of them had ever said to him or each other in quite some time. Every speech ended with declarations of love – “Scooter, we love you! Don’t ever forget that!” – and side conversations opened up topics that had only been guessed at –

“We’re thinking of moving in together, make this a permanent thing, you know?”

“I’m gonna ask Piggy to marry me this year.”

“I think you’d made a great father, Gonzo.”

A few hours of drinking, even if small glasses, without eating was starting to take their toll and the group headed out for a late lunch/early dinner, back where they started, this time at the Intermezzo Café & Bar, which was right across the street from the Grassini tasting room. The bar also offered several of the nearby vineyard wines, so the quintet was able to continue their wine tasting without getting sick thankfully.

With bellies full of food and wine, the last stop was their cozy little cottage, that was a nice little ending for the day. They had of course bought several of their own bottles and managed to crack open one more, something to drink while they watched horrible movies thanks to the room’s TV and Scooter tablet running Netflix – “Wolf Cop is the greatest movie ever made!” – and it was totally and completely the best day ever as far as Scooter was concerned.

That was until he got up the next day.