"The Moppet Family - Same Family, New Thread..."

[theprawncracker]

Jack: *squirms face around* ...Mrs. M. ...Whadaya say we head down to Diana's...They have sleeping pills there...

 

[Beauregard]

Mrs Moppet Senior: Diana's cafe? I suppose you concider that cuisine in these parts? Is there no where near with stars? Something with a sit down meal and a menu that does not sport a delicate splodge of mayonaise...

 

[theprawncracker]

Jack: ...Well if there is a place like that...I've never been here...Now come on before you tell the world that I'm an crime lord! I mean...Before you tell the world...I...am married to a board...Um...Yeah...

 

[Beauregard]

Mrs Moppet Senior: *stops in the road, with one hand holding Jack still by the wrist in the way of oncoming traffic* You're married?

 

[theprawncracker]

Jack: *to self* Yes! *To Mrs. Moppet Senior* YES! Yes, I'm married, my lovely board, we had our honeymoon at WOODrow Wilson's cabin...Yup, I do love my Splinterette...And our three children, Bark, Twiggy and Leave.

 

[Beauregard]

Mrs Moppet Senior: *straight faced, with bitter sneer* You are married? *sliver of a smile* You are married... *still standing in the road with car rasceing towards them* You were married, you mean.

--

Father: *driving said car* Oh my goodness!

 

[theprawncracker]

Jack: *about to be hit by car* AHHHHHHHH!!! MRS. MOPPET SENIOR I LOVE YOU! I'VE ALWAYS LOVED YOU! NOT MY LOVELY BOARD! YOU YOU YOU!!!

 

[Beauregard]

Mrs Moppet Senior: If you had always loved me, we would not be in this mess. Don't think I can't see past your physical...very nice physique-al exterior to see that you are wimped out by the car approaching over the speed limit.

--

Father: *inside car* Oops, I'm driving a little over the speed limit. *distracted by the speedometor* *drives on*

 

[theprawncracker]

Jack: *gulps* SAVE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *grabs onto Mrs. M. Senior for dear life*

 

[Beauregard]

Father: *drives* *hums to radio*

Mrs Moppet Senior: I'm sure he'll stop. *pushes Jack off her*