"The Moppet Family - Same Family, New Thread..."

Beauregard

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Father: *dives to grab ticket as the ticket collector enters* Hi, er, hi, I'm going to Alabama...I think..yeah...*sings* For I'm goin' to Alabama with my banjo on my knee...*end singing* *smile*

Ticketcollector: Ticket?

Father: Right. *hands over*

Ticketcollector: Wrong train buddy. This is A. L. A. S. K. er..., not A. L. A. B. C. D...wait...

Father: Um...

Ticketcollector: Read the sign. "All non-ticket carrying passengers may be evicted." *flings Father out the door so that he colides with a passing train and heads in another direction*
 

christyb

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Mother: *appears in front of Father* Remind me again why I find that so amusing?
 

Beauregard

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Father: *hanging onto a train door handle, outside, while Mother stands on the step* Because you are strangely twisted when it comes to me feeling pain? Or because I have a daughter from my secret service days? *pause* Hang on, let me eliminate that last sentence.
 

christyb

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Mother: No I think it's a combination of both. And trust me she's not just a plain ol' ordinary daughter. She's a freakin' model's daughter wearing this slinky showy thing and our son keeps walking around her like a lovesick puppy. Not to mention you didn't mention her existence to me at all.
 

Beauregard

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Father: *pained expression, not just from hanging onto a train at 90 miles an hour* I think I did...once...just a tiny bit...maybe...when you were asleep? *is hit by a passing fly* Oh that was an unpleasent sensation.
 

christyb

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Mother: Umm..lemme think...no you never did. What did this model "friend" of yours look like anyway? I mean after all she'd have to be something else right considering her daughter and well you two shared benefits.
 

Beauregard

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Father: Does this seem like a good time for this conversation? *pause* Is any time good for this conversation?
 

christyb

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Mother: *looks around* Seems like to be a good of time as any seeing as I have your attention and you can't run away.
 

Beauregard

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Father: Excellent points dear, which reminds me, Vanessa's mum...look...it was...she was...we were...I was...she...oh, perfect now I can't speak...wait, not she was perfect and now I can't speak, I mean, it's perfect that I can't speak...but not because I don't want to tell you, oh, it was a perfectly sarcastic perfect...
 

christyb

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Mother: *raises and eyebrow* That good looking huh? *self conciously looks down her own body and feels inadequate* So while I was trying to survive you were off playing hanky pank with a gorgeous Italian model. That makes me feel great.
 
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