T*K*O - "The Recruit"

[Beauregard]

WANTED: FEMALE, white, enjoys roasting mashmellows...wait...sorry, thought this was a personals page...excuse me...

 

[D'Snowth]

despising Elizabeth Montgomery*

(D'Snowth drums his fingers) That's not funny!
WANTED: None O'Yobeezwax
Known Aliases: D'Snowth, Courage-Bagge
Crime: Curiosity
Reward: 7 donkeys
Contact your local Thread Police today: 1-800-555-IWANNABEAGECKO

 

[Vic Romano]

WANTED: FEMALE, white, enjoys roasting mashmellows...wait...sorry, thought this was a personals page...excuse me...

(D'Snowth drums his fingers) That's not funny!
WANTED: None O'Yobeezwax
Known Aliases: D'Snowth, Courage-Bagge
Crime: Curiosity
Reward: 7 donkeys
Contact your local Thread Police today: 1-800-555-IWANNABEAGECKO

LOL!

 

[TogetherAgain]

You folks have me dying of laughter over here. Keep the WANTED's coming, they're absolutely hysterical... then again, the same goes for the whole thread, and for TKO in general... um... just ignore me...

 

[Beauregard]

... um... just ignore me...

Who?

And, yes, I did think they were at least funny enough to be chucklesworthy.

 

[MrsPepper]

Together Again, you make one too!
Beau, yours is, uh... creative?

Um, I'll try my hand at this.

WANTED: Some friends... please...
Known Aliases: MrsPepper, Save the trees
Unknown Aliases: Information Not Available
Crime: Starting a trend, gathering a group of miscreats in conspiracy for murder, making typos, being zealous
Reward: Ice-cream. Flavor of your choice, as long as it's Neopolitain
Contact your local Thread Police today: 1-800-IRFUN111

 

[Beauregard]

Beau, yours is, uh... creative?

Well, I'd like to point out for the judge and jury, honey *sarcastic*, that moi, me and I, and eye, am not a Thread Killa, and therefore an not wanted. (Sniff, no one waaaaaaants me! Sniff, sniff, sniff...well, no wonder, what a smell! Sorry...) Where was I? Oh yes, therefore, I do not need an Alias (see, a Miss Piggy refernece there) and so I figured...something funny...hmmm....Ah ha! But if you prefer:

UNWANTED: B. Regard
Known Aliases: Beau, Bo, King Agrippa, and "You, boy with the niffy under socks"
Crime: None (unless you count having niffy undersocks a crime)
Reward: He will get an icecream cone...and a footbath for having no crimes.
Contact: Your local Hotline for more information,. on, 911 (slight pause) 7445622

 

[MrsPepper]

I didnt mean you had to write a new one! I liked it. But adjectives were escaping me, and I was merely nquiring if the one I selected was a good fit.

 

[That Announcer]

One for my buddy Zach, who has killed more threads on various boards than all of us have combined:

WANTED: Zach Kilfoil
KNOWN ALIASES: Zach, Zacharino, The kid with the hair
CRIME: Thread killing, unkempt hair, despising That Announcer for despising Elizabeth Montgomery, hitting various persons directly in the nose with footballs
REWARD: A strawberry filled doughnut
Contact your local police at 123 Sesame Street, phone number 776-2323.

 

[TogetherAgain]

Together Again, you make one too!

Alright, but I'm not a threadkiller...

WANTED: Lisa Whatserface
Known Aliases: TogetherAgain, Lisa007Lou, Hug Committee, Liz's little sister, that one girl, VIM, Ann Gora, Kelly, Tabbytha
Crime: Constant nagging of those neglecting to write their fanfictions, eating too much peanut butter, telling the same joke too many times.
Reward: A teddy bear or two or ten or twenty-some
Contact your local thread police today: 1 (234) 567-8910