Chapter twenty-three
Go-fer-it: Hey Skeet, you there?
Skeetazon: Scoot! how’s the un-promotion?
Go-fer-it: Pretty terrible
Skeetazon: uh oh, good thing it’s temporary
Go-fer-it: No kidding. You wouldn’t believe what’s happened today.
Skeetazon: try me
Go-fer-it: 6 penguins tried to get jobs holding cue cards, and a bunch of pickles were trying to audition with some kind of song and dance number, but they couldn’t even figure out what they were doing.
Go-fer-it: and that was just in the last 10 minutes
Skeetazon: ...I think you finally lost it, Scoot
Go-fer-it: I didn’t lose it, it’s just everyone around me that’s going nuts.
Go-fer-it: I don’t know what those pickles were thinking
Skeetazon: they were thinking they could get a job from my crazy brother
Go-fer-it: I just wish Kermit would come back and straighten this all out. Why couldn’t he just visit the swamp for a day or two and come back? I can’t do this
Skeetazon: Scooter?
Skeetazon: do you remember mom and dad at all?
Go-fer-it: No
Go-fer-it: I don’t really even remember much of when they died
Skeetazon: me either
Skeetazon: Do you think we would want to?
Go-fer-it: Maybe. I never really thought about it.
Skeetazon: I remember a little
Skeetazon: I remember that I wished I could have been there
Go-fer-it: Why?
Go-fer-it: We were still babies. Neither of us could have changed it.
Skeetazon: nevermind
Go-fer-it: Is something wrong?
Skeetazon: nothing
Go-fer-it: Skeet, tell me.
Skeetazon: I wished I could have been with mom and dad
Skeetazon: maybe Kermit wants to be with his mom
Go-fer-it: oh
Go-fer-it: I guess I didn’t think of it that way.
Skeetazon: I figured as much
Go-fer-it: Hey Skeet, I gotta go. Rizzo needs help with the prop list
Skeetazon: Alright, ttyl. hug Cliffy for me
Go-fer-it: I’ll tell him you say hi
Skeetazon: whatev.
Go-fer-it: later
Skeetazon: yup
Go-fer-it: hey Skeet?
Skeetazon: yeah?
Go-fer-it: thanks.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“That’s not true,” Robin said. “I talk to lots of humans. They’re really nice.”
“Oh they may act real nice,” the alligator said. “But once you trust them too much, they catch you, and that’s the end. You’re in their trap.”
“But what about Jerry?” Robin insisted. “Every frog in the swamp trusts him, and he’s never hurt any of us.”
“Oh, he will!” the alligator said. “All humans want to do is eat you. Just stop talking to humans now while you’re still-“
“Arnie!” Kermit said as he walked to the pond’s edge. “You’re still spinning those lies?”
“It’s the truth!” the alligator insisted. “You’re lucky you’re still alive, with all the human’s you’ve talked to.”
Kermit shook his head.
“Uncle Kermit, is it time to go?” Robin asked excitedly.
Kermit smiled. “If you wanna walk, it is,” he said.
Robin immediately hopped to his feet. “Bye Arnie!” he said.
“Yeah, see ya,” Kermit waved. The alligator sank back into the water as the two frogs walked away.
“It’s not true, is it, Uncle Kermit?” Robin asked as they split the marsh grasses. “What Arnie said, about how animals who talk to humans get killed and cooked-“
“And eaten alive?” Kermit finished. He shook his head. “Not a word of it. He used to tell me the same thing. Don’t mind Arnie. He means well, but that doesn’t mean he’s right. Besides, how could someone be killed
and eaten alive?”
They broke through the last of the marsh grasses and found themselves on the familiar old dirt road.
Robin held his uncle’s hand. “You know what Uncle Kermit?” he said. “I’m glad I don’t have to listen to Arnie all the time.”
Kermit laughed. “Me too, Robin,” he said, and they turned towards the town.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“Forty-five seconds to curtain!” Scooter announced. “Rowlf, get out there. Clifford, lights!”
“Scooter, we heard you fifteen seconds ago!” Clifford called down from the lights.
“Just checking!” Scooter called.
“Oh I am so excited!” Grover said. “Is Froggy-Baby going to watch the show from the swamp?”
“Well, he’ll be watching,” Scooter said, “But I don’t think they have TVs in the actual swamp.”
“Here we go,” Rowlf said as he hurried to the big O.
“Okay, are you ready, Grover?” Scooter asked.
“I am ready!”
“Good. Fifteen seconds to curtain, everybody!”
Rowlf took his place, waited for his cue, swung open the O, and poked his head out. “It’s the Muppet Show, with our very special guest star, Grover Monster from Sesame Street!”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Kermit sat at the counter in Juhl’s Pizza Place, nervously watching the television screen. He had to admit that he felt guilty about not being there for this show. He had told Grover just a short while ago that they could sing together on the show, not long after the monster’s escapade in Hollywood. Now he was going back on his word. He knew that Grover wouldn’t mind too much, but he hated to disappoint an old friend. He wasn’t even there to make sure everything went right.
He watched as the curtains parted for the opening number. Miss Piggy stood in the center of the dark empty stage, illuminated by well-placed, carefully adjusted lights. The music stirred, and she began to sing.
“
On my own,
Pretending he’s beside me.
All alone,
I walk with him till morning.
Without him,
I feel his arms around me,
And when I lose my way
I close my eyes and he has
Found me.
In the rain,
The pavement shines like silver.”
Perfectly on cue, there was a light patter of rain in the background, and a few dim lights revealed silvery-looking pavement behind her.
“
All the lights
Are misty in the river.”
Streetlights appeared, reflecting in a river that had not been visible before.
“
In the darkness,
The trees are full of starlight...”
Maggie clamped her hands to her head. “What a
painful voice,” she whined.
“Hush,” Kermit said quietly, his eyes still on the screen. “She’s not used to low notes.”
“Then why is she singing that song?” Maggie asked.
“I don’t know, I wasn’t there,” Kermit said. He inspected the screen, then glanced at his mother. She was sitting in a booth, relaxed, holding his father’s hand, apparently enjoying the show.
From looking at her, no one could have guessed that she had a brain tumor, or that she would have a major experimental surgery the next day.
Kermit turned back to the screen and inspected the show, hoping that nothing would go wrong.
“
I love him,
But when the night is over,
He is gone,
The river’s just a river...”
Miss Piggy hardly moved on the stage, but the lights were constantly changing, dimly revealing a background of everything the lyrics referred to.
Clifford put a lot of work into this, Kermit thought to himself, noting every detail and wondering how many little light bulbs it had taken to create the starry sky above Miss Piggy. He took another glance at his mother, then turned back to the screen. Miss Piggy had reached the climax of the song.
“
Without me,
His world will go on turning.
The world is full of happiness
That I have never
KNOWN!”
At that highest note, every light on the stage suddenly flickered out, leaving complete silent darkness.
Kermit felt himself gasp and clutch the edge of the counter. He held his breath.
They held the silence.
Then a single shaft of light broke through, perfectly lighting Miss Piggy’s face.
“
I love him...”
The beam grew wider, her entire upper body now illuminated.
“
I love him...”
Now her entire body was visible.
“
I love him...
But only on my own...”
The spotlight snapped off to thunderous applause.
Kermit breathed a sigh of relief, then smiled and shook his head.
“They pulled one over on ya, didn’t they, Mit?” Maggie said. “Don’t they know that’s my job?”
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