Pigs singing the Happy Wanderer

[MartyMuppets]

Here's a little story I've been thinking about.


The manager of the Alpine Lodge Hotel looked up from his desk as a trio of pigs entered the front door walking up to his reception desk taking off their knapsacks. "Can I help you?" He asked politely.
One of the pigs with squinty eyes and a large snout said "Hi. My name is Gerald. My two best buddies, Dick and David are hiking around the country with me together and we'd like a room to stay in for a couple of days' rest."
"Certainly piggies. I can put you up in a nice room. Are you going to hike up any of the beautiful alps surrounding our little town here?"
To his surprise the pigs started to get nervous and shake.
"Uh no. We only wander along the foothills in the valleys when we hike, or just very low hills. The last time we went up into the alps themselves somewhere we fell off one by one."
"What? It seems incredible to me that the three of you can possibly still be alive after that occurence! How could you have possibly survived?"

The pigs settled down and Gerald explained to the manager.
"We still don't know exactly what happened to this day, but we could have been killed for sure. We were strangely fortunate. We were singing together happily as we were climbing when suddenly David's line somehow came loose and he fell. Dick and I both thought he was a goner for sure. But it turned out a family had set up camp at the base of the mountain and the children had a trampoline right at the very bottom. They were just about to jump on it themselves when David came landing on it with a scream and bounced up and down for five minutes scaring them."
"Goodness me." The manager was amazed by the story so far and David nodded his head to assert it was true. He told them to please continue.
So Gerald went on, "So Dick and I were getting worried about meeting the same fate ourselves and we climbed higher singing some more paying close attention to our footing and I held up the rope to verify it was firm and secure but inexplicably it came loose again and poor Dick went tumbling down after David. Back down at the bottom the children's parents were alerted to their crying and were demanding to know what was going on when Dick fell upon the trampoline also and startled them as much as their children."
The pig named Dick added, "We can't understand what happened to our climbing rope and we don't know how we fell but David and I both felt like something hit us hard in the back of our legs knocking us off." David nodded agreement and the manager's eyes were almost popping out of his head in astonishment.
"And what about you?" He asked Gerald.
"Well. I was pretty upset since I had no idea what was going on and I was so nervous and apprehensive that I was trembling with every step I took and I was so relieved at not falling when I reached the same moment in the chorus of my song at which my buddies had fallen. But then I was pushed down the mountain by two huge, solid boulders that came rolling from out of nowhere."
"Oh me! Oh my!" The manager could barely believe the story.
"Yes it's true." Gerald asserted, "And I almost was killed but David and Dick had fervently pleaded with the family to leave the trampoline in place for the sake of me, their very best friend and so I landed on it. But as I was bouncing everybody cried out when they saw the rocks and as the parents grabbed their children, my best friends grabbed me and quickly pulled me off the trampoline and away to cover just before the boulders smashed it to pieces."
David added "We had to pay the family the cost of the trampoline or go to court, so we paid them. But in the end we were just so happy to have miraculously survived our ordeal and we have never been able to set foot on another mountain track since it happened a week ago."
The manager said that was a very amazing story and gave the piggies their room-key and had a porter take their three knapsacks up the elevator with them. He didn't really believe their story. He thought they were spinning an elaborate yarn, and so silly and far-fetched too when he noticed a goat come to the reception desk next carrying a suitcase.
"Hello. Can I help you? He asked.
"Yes. I live way up in the alps twenty miles away from here." said the goat. "I thought I'd try to get a room here for a few days so I could have a holiday here in your alpine town."
"Certainly Mr.Goat. Do you have a nice home in the alps?"
"I sure do. Though I had to deal with some invaders last week. They were disturbing the peace singing rowdily. But I fixed them between bumping two of them off and using a couple of heavy boulders to dispatch the last one."

Somebody else has told me by PM that the female piggies would certainly be very different and imagine if those lady pigs had fallen upon the trampoline in my cute little story quoted above. He said what if the last one had ripped her skirt when the others pulled her off the trampoline just before the boulders landed? The poor family's kids would have been scarred for life.
Seriously I told him, I don't think it's likely that woman hikers would wear skirts or dresses at all. I imagine they'd be much more comfy climbing a mountain with the same standard clothes as men would wear, wouldn't they?

On the other hand muppets do so many crazy things maybe they'd be silly enough to go happy wandering in their skirts and petticoats. LOL
If the lady piggies went climbing in high heels, all the evil goat would've had to do is sit back and watch them eventually lose their footing sending them all falling together by the rope attatching them.

 

[Skye]

Haha, the muppet female piggies trying to climb the mountain with high heels on... that would be funny in itself!! And you're right, the evil goat sure would have a lot of fun, and an awfully easy job!

 

[Skekayuk]

No, I don't think so.

If you mean it the way I think you do, then I think "eeeeeeeee" is generally an excited scream, or squeal (I'm pretty sure I squealed like that when my cousin got engaged, hehe! )... or, "Eeeek, a mouse," I guess. But I think "aaaaahhhhhh" is a universal scream for "Help, an evil goat is knockin' me off a mountain!"

Well Louise can certainly scream it either way She's got a rather wide ranging voice. I think though while her Muppet pigs were generally upper register, her normal voice is lower pitched. - She's still good at screaming. - At least if her current West End performance is anything to go by... Exit through a trap door with a scream.

 

[MartyMuppets]

Hello Skekayuk. My name is Marty. I'm very pleased to meet you.

 

[MartyMuppets]

May I just take a moment to wish everybody who reads my silly thread all the best for 2007.

May you all have a truly Happy Wandering New Year with no evil goats to threaten you at all.

 

[Skye]

Absolutely! Happy New Year to everyone, and all those silly happy wandering pigs out there!

And always....... watch your step!

 

[MartyMuppets]

Absolutely! Happy New Year to everyone, and all those silly happy wandering pigs out there!

And always....... watch your step!

That's right. God may answer my prayers to keep all the evil goats at bay. But you are still responsible for being sensible about making sure your footing is secure.

The Lord helps those who help themselves isn't actually in the Bible. But I believe it is at least indirectly implied and attested to.

 

[Skekayuk]

Hello Skekayuk. My name is Marty. I'm very pleased to meet you.

Hello Marty,
Thanks for that, and a happy new year to you too.
I've been around on the MC msg board for several years, I just don't post as much as I used to.
Emma

 

[MartyMuppets]

Thanks Emma. Happy New Year to you too.

So what do you think of my silly thread? Isn't it great? Do you have any favourite quirks I've said in it?

 

[Skye]

The Lord helps those who help themselves isn't actually in the Bible. But I believe it is at least indirectly implied and attested to.

Oh, absolutely! And at some point, we all do need to learn how to look out for evil goats while we're happy wandering, don't we?

And ya know, I actually just watched this sketch again last night, and now I just giggle throughout the entire thing, just thinking about this silly thread!