Muppet College Dorms: The Next Semester

[The Count]

Oh... That tree. Sure, we can bring it in on the weekend and decorate accordingly. There'll be a raffle to see who gets to place the star on the tippy-top, that seems fairest to me.

*Checks scores. Yeah, Patriots still undefeated. Gotta watch tomorrow to see if the Dolphins join 'em as unvictorious.
Sweet dreams everybody.

UD, VO: MC Dorms have been brought to you by the letter X and by the number 3. Rest in peace, after all, it's only...

 

[BeakerSqueedom]

Claudia:
Bunnie, I don't like being in a box.
I think I'm gonna turn clusterphobic.

Bunsen:
Nonsense!
This will work, I promise!

Claudia:
I have the strangest idea this box isn't really an invention.
I'm starting to think you want to ship me off to some dumpster.

Bunsen:
Silly, Claudia!
Why would I do such a thing?
Truly, do you see me as a bad man?

Claudia:
No...I still don't understand why you turned me back into a rabbit.
(Paws the box)
I don't like this.

Beaker:
(Quietly passes Bunsen a red ribbon)

Dr. Van Neuter:
Stop whinning!

Claudia:
What's the purpose of this anyway?

Bunsen:
(Tapes the ribbon to the top of the box)
Erm...

Dr. Van Neuter:
(Gets an idea)
It's a surprise!

Claudia:
Oh really?

Beaker:
(Tapes the card on the box)
Meee meee!

Bunsen:
Excellent!
Away with her, Beakie!

Beaker:
(Shakes the box)

Claudia:
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Bunsen:
(Lightly smacks Beaker on the arm)
Never shake a gift.

Claudia:
SHAKE WHAT?

Bunsen:
Oh...Oh, dear.
(Covers his face in embarrassment)
I think I'll just...

Dr. Van Neuter:
Nothing!
The jig is up!
We've been discovered!
(Throws her out of the room)

---

Claudia:
You guys are going to pay...
(The box hops around the hallway)

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Scooter: (sticks head out the door, spots gift-wrapped Claudia) Hey, did you guys see that gift box hopping down the stairs just now?
Erin: Must be another present for Beth or something.
Beige: Oh, right...so what are we sending up for her?
Storyteller: Well, there's that bright-red Toe-Tickler silk poncho from me...the red and gold vase from Erin...Nora said she'd send over a few books of poetry, and Scooter, you found her that disc of jazz music...
Beige: Okay, then for me, one volume of fifty more ghost stories from Fraggle Cave. Can't be beat.
Storyteller: (frowning) If you say so. (pauses) Now, as for the other birthday to be celebrated...Nora won't be coming back for a few hours, will she?
Erin: I called Mrs. Farley and told her to keep the birthday girl busy for a little while.
Scooter: How's the cake coming?
Erin: It's got a few minutes left in the oven, so we can get going on the raspberry mousse. (pause) Okay, has everyone got their presents in a secure spot?
Storyteller: Most certainly. I got her a brush and comb set made out of Nirvana tree wood...what about you three?
Scooter: Beige and I got her a rock fountain for her desk.
Erin: I got her an anthology of ghost stories set in London. It's hiding under my bed.
Storyteller: Better move it someplace else, or you'll never find it again.
Erin: Come on, Storyteller, my room's not that cluttered. (timer beeps) Okay, cake's ready.

 

[redBoobergurl]

Beth: Aww, what nice gifts from Erin and her roomies, I'll have to send them some of my fresh baked cookies
Wanda: Also don't forget Nora has a birthday today
Beth: Ah yes. Well let's see here, what do we want to give her?
Wanda: We should consult Mokey, they have alot in common
Beth: Good idea, I hope she returns from class soon!

 

[The Count]

*Notices hopping mad giftbox. Huh, guess she hopped an elevator ride and got downstairs. Oh well, back up the rabbit hole she goes.
*Bats clutch the parcel and lift it back to the second/main floor of the dorms.

Now then... On to the shopping list.
*At the door to Room #3 there appears a tea cup set with a container of green mist tea to get Beth inspired to write fics again, a five-point star thanking her for the five Rowlf's Stories, and a big plush of Rowlf to be her worktime watchdog.

*Continuing down the hall to Room #7, a set of jingling silver bells are placed, next to the commemorative Letter B from 221 B Street album, and a gift certificate for a spree at Mystery Wystery Lane.

 

[BeakerSqueedom]

Bunsen:
Hmm, I think this would make a nice gift for Beth.
Wouldn't you agree?

Dr. Van Neuter:
Oh yeah, a pet-eating flower is PERFECT for the Beth-day gal.

Giant flower:
I love you, Bethy.
My amour!
My love!
My sun!

Dr. Van Neuter:
This is your lucky day--you freak of nature!
(Pats it)
You'll be able to sing songs for her all night and day!

Giant Flower:
(Gobbles Phil up--nearly)

Dr. Van Neuter:
MMFFFRRRRRR!

Bunsen:
Whatever shall I do?

Beaker:
Meep meep meep.
Translation: Don't look at me, idiot.

Bunsen:
(Frowns)

---
Claudia:
(Pokes her head out of the box and roars)
RAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWR!
(Hops to her room)

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Scooter: What, behind the rabbit?
Beige: It is the rabbit!
Storyteller: Get inside, you two, I hear Nora coming.
Beige: I warned them, but oh, no, oh, it's just a harmless little bunny...
Scooter: We'll not risk another frontal assault. That rabbit's dyna...
Storyteller: Don't say it, Crazy Harry might be listening.

Nora: Oh, thanks, Beth...mmm, cookies! (walks to room, munching on one)

Scooter: Didn't you have a meeting tonight?
Erin: (seated at computer) I did, the council was trying to pass a new constitution again. (pause) It failed.
Beige: So now what?
Erin: (tapping a few keys) I'm thinking of doing a news analysis, and...(Nora enters) hold that thought.
All: Happy birthday to you...the dorms are a zoo...you look like a Muppet...happy birthday to you...
Nora: Aw, you guys...Beth loves her gifts. She sent over some cookies as a thank-you.
Scooter: Ed and the guys sent over some gifts - you've got a Letter B single, a gift certificate for Mystery Wystery Lane, and a set of bells.
Erin: And then there's the stuff from us - come on, dinner's up, and we've got chocolate cake with raspberry mousse filling for dessert.

(gang heads into kitchen)

 

[BeakerSqueedom]

[I just laughed, Erin. I don't know why I was so flattered by your recent post. I must be going nuts. LOL!]

Bunsen:
Beth, dear.
We've a gift for you!
(Says in a sing-song voice)

Giant Flower:
(Sings "Baby, be mine" by Michael Jackson)

Dr. Van Neuter:
(Covered in slobber)
Yeah...

Beaker:
(Has a small necklace in his hand for Beth)

[They leave the flower and the necklace near her door]

---

Bunsen:
Oh, how wonderful it is, to not have to face that hideous woman.

Claudia:
YOU SURE 'BOUT THAT?

[They all scream]

 

[The Count]

Heh... Those lines by Scooter and Beige were dialogue from the movie Monty Python and the Holy Grail. It's from the part of the movie towards the two-thirds mark where King Arthur and the knights must confront a dread horror... A man-eating bunny rabbit. And to be rid of such a monster, they summon the priests of the Church of Holy Armaments to read from the scriptures of the Sancted Holy Hand Grenade. If you get the chance, rent it and see it, along with the more traditional Monty Python Christmas movie, Life of Brian.

*Whistling "Bright Side of Life".
UD: Ah, the man-eating rabbit schtick again. Well, at least this man-eating woman rabbit can devour that plant if it gets too unruly.

 

[BEAR]

Ernie: Yoo-hoo! We're back!
Bryan: Hey, guys! Welcome back! Did you have a fun Thanksgiving?
Big Bird: We were in a parade! Did you see us?
Bryan: Every year! You all did great.
Big Bird: I love parades!
Snuffy: I didn't ride in the parade, my my little sister Alice did. I'm too big.
Bryan: I don't think you can ever be too old to be in a parade.
Snuffy: No, I mean I'm too big. I couldn't fit on the float.
Bryan: Oh!
Snuffy: But that's okay. I had fun watching. Little Alice is so cute.
Big Bird: I missed you in the parade, Snuff, but maybe next year they'll have a big Snuffleupagus balloon floating in the air.
Snuffy: That would be cool!
Bert: My day was nice and relaxing until the football game started.
Bryan: But, Bert, football is a big part of the Thanksgiving season.
Bert: On TV, not the living room! Ernie brought a whole team of monsters home to play.
Ernie: It was fun! Khekhekhe!
Bert: (sarcastic) Yeah...real fun.
Ernie: But atleast we were together, buddy.
Bert: Yeah, that's true. Eh-eh-eh! And my brother Bart did pay a visit.
Bryan: How about you, Cookie Monster. You have fun?
Cookie: Did me have fun? Me got to eat all day. It me favorite holiday next to Halloween.
Bryan: Ed left some yummy treats at the door. I think they're Seven-layer bars.
Cookie: Oooh! (gobbles one up) 7 delicious number! Ha ha ha!
Bryan: Good to have you all back because now's the time to get ready for my favorite holiday...Christmas! We've also got to get Beth's belated birthday present.