Hensonville City 2011

[LinkiePie<3]

Johnny Fiama: What's so funny? Is there somethin' on my tailored suit? -.-

Angie: *snicker* Aw. I vote for Sway.

Sal Minella: Me, too.

Linda Mezzo: Likewise... I'd love to dance to that song. <3

Johnny Fiama: Sway it is. And sure, Baby-Face. I'll dance with ya'.

Link Hogthrob: Okay. I picked my song. Toreador it is. I just got to find my matador suit before rehersal.

Angie: Yay! Men in tights! :B

 

[RedPiggy]

Kelly (applauds): I can't wait! *gathers Sarah, Bear, Cotterpin, and Wrench and hands out some popcorn they found earlier*

 

[LinkiePie<3]

Angie settles herself with the rest of the audience, sharing popcorn; Annie Sue dims the lights as Sal Minella, the Masters of Ceremonies makes his cue:

Sal Minella: Thank you! Thank you! Muwah! I love you guys! *ahem* Ladies, and gentlemen. Doozers, and silly creatures. Welcome to the first annual Link "Iron my Pants" Hogthrob vs. Johnny "Shine my Shoes" Fiama sing-off. Our openin' song'll be performed by the talented, lunkish, and so-called handsome boar, Link Hogthrob-- singing the opera aria, "Les Toreadors" from George Bizet's famous opera "Carmen"

Canned Applause

Link Hogthrob: *clad in matador suit*
Oui, les Toreros, peuvent s'entendre;
Pour plaisirs, pour plaisirs,
Ils ont les combats!
Le cirque est plein,
c'est jour de fete!
Le cirque est plein du haut en bas;
Les spectateurs, perdant la tete,
Les spectateurs s'interpellent
a grand fracas!
Apostrophes, cris et tapage
Pousses jusques a la fureur!
Car c'est la fete du courage!
C'est la fete des gens de co
Allons! en garde! Allons! Allons! ah!
Toreador, en garde! Toreador, Toreador!
Et songe bien, oui, songe en combattant
Qu'un oeil noir te regarde,
Et que l'amour t'attend,
Toreador, L'amour t'attend!
Et songe bien, oui, songe en combattant
Qu'un oeil noir te regarde,
Et que l'amour t'attend,
Toreador, L'amour t'attend!

Polite applause; Annie Sue waves, then throws her hankerchief to Link <3

Sal Minella: Now for the grand finale... here's Ol' Black Eyes himself; the famous croonin' Italian sex-symbol who stole every woman's heart-- singing, and leading a romantic tango with his lovely, and sarcastic girlfriend, Linda Mezzo to Dean Martin's Sway. Ladies and gentlemen, give a warm welcome to Johnny Fiama!

Canned Applause

Johnny Fiama:
When marimba rhythms start to play
Dance with me, make me sway
Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore
Hold me close, sway me more

Like a flower bending in the breeze
Bend with me, sway with ease
When we dance you have a way with me
Stay with me, sway with me

Other dancers may be on the floor
Dear, but my eyes will see only you
Only you have the magic technique
When we sway I go weak

I can hear the sounds of violins
Long before it begins
Make me thrill as only you know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now

Other dancers may be on the floor
Dear, but my eyes will see only you
Only you have the magic technique
When we sway I go weak

I can hear the sounds of violins
Long before it begins
Make me thrill as only you know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now
You know how
Sway me smooth, sway me now

Johnny dips Linda

 

[RedPiggy]

Kelly (applauds Link and imagines Link as a fearless bullfighter)

Cotterpin (scratches head): I think I've heard this song before. Too bad I can't understand the words. *pulls Kelly's pants leg* Hey, isn't this in some cartoon about a gray bunny?

Kelly (chuckles, now imagining Link as a Chuck Jones-esque bullfighter, tries not to die laughing)

Sarah and Bear (wag tail to Sway)

Kelly (applauds Johnny, whispering to Cotterpin): And I heard As the World Falls Down was ... uh ... suggestive. Daaaang.

Cotterpin (shrugs): I don't know what's so suggestive about it. Doozers have a song similar to this, but it's about an engineer discussing the potential for a Doozer Bridge to fall down in a strong wind.

Kelly (facepalms)

 

[LinkiePie<3]

Angie: *laughs* You're too adorable, 'Pinny. xD

Linda Mezzo: *petting the dogs* Y'like that, babies? Huh? Didja?

Sal Minella: 'Ey! The show ain't over yet! Now it's time for the audience to vote for their favorite singer!

Link Hogthrob: Me.

Johnny Fiama: Me.

Annie Sue: Link.

Linda Mezzo: Johnny.

Sal Minella: Johnny.

Link Hogthrob: ... me!

Sal Minella: Hey! Ya' can't vote twice! D<

Johnny Fiama: Me. ;D

Sal Minella: Thank you, Johnny.

 

[RedPiggy]

Kelly: Gosh, voting's hard. Both songs are so, so, so THEM.

Cotterpin: Looney Tunes fan. Go with the pig.

Wrench: Sal wasn't an option?

Sarah and Bear (not fond of loud singing, lick Johnny's face)

Kelly: Hm ... well, I, uh, I ... huh ... which one? *puts on blindfold and points to both of them* I think ... I pick ... YOU. *opens her eyes and spots ...

 

[LinkiePie<3]

Link Hogthrob: *graces a pose* Thank you. Thank you, my ladies. <3

Johnny Fiama: *having his face licked* -_- I know, but please quit lickin' my face.

Linda Mezzo: *giggle* Aw. Johnny's just kiddin', sweeties... he loves y'guys.

Johnny Fiama: Don't encourage 'em, Linda. -_-

Sal Minella: *to Wrench* If ya' like me, then I'm countin' your pick as a vote permanently to Johnny.

Link Hogthrob: *to Kelly* Hello, my dear! You're on my team now. <3

Sal Minella: Angie... ?

Angie: Umm...

Johnny Fiama: Yes... ?

Link Hogthrob: Mhm... ?

Angie: ...uh... you were both great...

Sal Minella : One vote!

Angie: Er... *gives Link a peck on the cheek* Link! ;*

Link Hogthrob: Aww... I feel loved, like I should be. <3

Sal Minella: Okay... everyone casted in their votes. Now, I'll count.

Five Minutes Later

Sal Minella: ... and the winner is...

 

[RedPiggy]

Kelly: LINK! *bows to Johnny* Sorry, but I dig opera. It's super-cereal hardcore.

 

[The Count]

*Thought he heard What's Opera Doc?, hm, must be another storm caused by the ol' spear and magic helmet.
*Mixes salad to the tune Bugs prepped Elmer's bald head like a fruit salad during the Marriage of Figaro short.

 

[LinkiePie<3]

Link Hogthrob: I'm more than hardcore, my dear, I'm extensively well-known as the everything man. <3

Annie Sue: Only to the local public. ^^

Johnny Fiama: *ignores Link* ... *to Kelly* S'all right, doll. I understand. ;D

Sal Minella: ... and the winner is... Johnny Fiama! By one vote!