Part VI: Behind the Scenes
Part VI: Behind the Scenes
Fozzie was in his dressing room, hiding under the loveseat. He took off his hat and used it to wipe the beads of sweat from his brow. Then he started nervously twisting the hat. She was going to find him. He knew it. It was just a matter of time.
“Scooter! Just where is that good-for-nothing bear?”
Uh oh. The jig was up.
“Gee, I don’t know, Miss Piggy. The last time I saw Fozzie, he was in his dressing room.”
Fozzie flinched as the door opened. A pair of silver pumps were visible from under the couch. Fozzie was afraid that if he so much as breathed, Piggy would know where he was hiding.
“Fozzie?” she called out sweetly. “Oh, Fozzzzziiieee?”
Ho ho. He wasn’t falling for that. No, ma’am. Piggy was trying to trick him, but he knew she was still mad. But—oh, no—a tickle—in his nose—Fozzie had to sneeze. Not good. Very not good. He tried to stifle the sneeze. He tried to fight it, but the sneeze was too strong for him. So he buried his face in his hat, hoping that would muffle the sound.
“Achoo!”
Miss Piggy whirled around. “I heard that. Show yourself, throw rug.”
Wiping his nose on his scarf, Fozzie sighed and climbed up from the floor. “Here I am, Piggy. What can I do for you?”
“For starters, you can tell me why you have missed the last three morning meetings. You know how important they are.”
“I, um … ” Fozzie stared at the floor. Then he looked up and grinned. “Three-day flu?”
Piggy was not amused. “Try again.”
Fozzie collapsed into a mess instantly. “Oh, Piggy, I’m so sorry. It’s like this, Piggy, you see, I mean, it’s just that—”
“Out with it, Fozzie!”
“The meetings are scary, Piggy!” Fozzie started twisting and fiddling with his hat again. “It seems nothing we do is ever right. And you change your mind so often, even if we get it right, you want us to change it anyways.”
Piggy’s eyes grew wide in outrage at the insubordination. But before she could yell or karate-chop Fozzie, someone coughed from behind. Miss Piggy and Fozzie both turned towards the door, where all the other Muppets had gathered to eavesdrop. “And what do you think you’re doing?” asked Piggy, indignant. “Aren’t all of you supposed to be rehearsing?”
“Um …”
Kermit stepped forward. “Miss Piggy, may I have a word with you?” He glanced back at the others. “Alone?”
“But of course, Kermie.”
Rizzo piped up. “All right, you heard the frog. Everyone out!”
“Si,” added Pepe under his breath, “we do not want to be around for this, okay. No way.”
Kermit turned to Fozzie. “Fozzie, why don’t you go rehearse that number you have with Rowlf?”
“Yes sir, Kermit.” He didn’t look at Miss Piggy but kept his eyes trained to the floor until he was in the hall, looking up only in order to shut the door behind him.
Part VI: Behind the Scenes
Fozzie was in his dressing room, hiding under the loveseat. He took off his hat and used it to wipe the beads of sweat from his brow. Then he started nervously twisting the hat. She was going to find him. He knew it. It was just a matter of time.
“Scooter! Just where is that good-for-nothing bear?”
Uh oh. The jig was up.
“Gee, I don’t know, Miss Piggy. The last time I saw Fozzie, he was in his dressing room.”
Fozzie flinched as the door opened. A pair of silver pumps were visible from under the couch. Fozzie was afraid that if he so much as breathed, Piggy would know where he was hiding.
“Fozzie?” she called out sweetly. “Oh, Fozzzzziiieee?”
Ho ho. He wasn’t falling for that. No, ma’am. Piggy was trying to trick him, but he knew she was still mad. But—oh, no—a tickle—in his nose—Fozzie had to sneeze. Not good. Very not good. He tried to stifle the sneeze. He tried to fight it, but the sneeze was too strong for him. So he buried his face in his hat, hoping that would muffle the sound.
“Achoo!”
Miss Piggy whirled around. “I heard that. Show yourself, throw rug.”
Wiping his nose on his scarf, Fozzie sighed and climbed up from the floor. “Here I am, Piggy. What can I do for you?”
“For starters, you can tell me why you have missed the last three morning meetings. You know how important they are.”
“I, um … ” Fozzie stared at the floor. Then he looked up and grinned. “Three-day flu?”
Piggy was not amused. “Try again.”
Fozzie collapsed into a mess instantly. “Oh, Piggy, I’m so sorry. It’s like this, Piggy, you see, I mean, it’s just that—”
“Out with it, Fozzie!”
“The meetings are scary, Piggy!” Fozzie started twisting and fiddling with his hat again. “It seems nothing we do is ever right. And you change your mind so often, even if we get it right, you want us to change it anyways.”
Piggy’s eyes grew wide in outrage at the insubordination. But before she could yell or karate-chop Fozzie, someone coughed from behind. Miss Piggy and Fozzie both turned towards the door, where all the other Muppets had gathered to eavesdrop. “And what do you think you’re doing?” asked Piggy, indignant. “Aren’t all of you supposed to be rehearsing?”
“Um …”
Kermit stepped forward. “Miss Piggy, may I have a word with you?” He glanced back at the others. “Alone?”
“But of course, Kermie.”
Rizzo piped up. “All right, you heard the frog. Everyone out!”
“Si,” added Pepe under his breath, “we do not want to be around for this, okay. No way.”
Kermit turned to Fozzie. “Fozzie, why don’t you go rehearse that number you have with Rowlf?”
“Yes sir, Kermit.” He didn’t look at Miss Piggy but kept his eyes trained to the floor until he was in the hall, looking up only in order to shut the door behind him.