The Infamous Rubber Chicken...

[Fozzie Bear]

HIYA!

Well, I think everyone should remember by now me and my constant ranting about my Rubber Chicken.

Indeed, throughout history--well, since the creation of them to begin with--rubber chickens have been a staple of the comedy circuit. In ancient Rome, as a matter of fact, the rubber chicken was used as a device for catapults and cannons.

Had it not been for the rubber chicken, the Michellen Man would have starved long ago.

And, believe it or not, the rubber chicken was responsible for the end of World Wars One and Two...that's right. I can't think of any reason to tell as to HOW, so give me some time to make something up.

At any rate, in more recent times, I have used my Rubber Chicken as a means to make jokes or gags...or jokes that make you gag...here at Muppet Central; I threatened to smack Brian Henson in the back of the head with my rubber chicken when the EM.TV deal was made, and have threatened others here with my rubber chicken as well.

Today, after posting to Frogboy, and finding my rubber chicken behind a chair here in my room (that chicken gets around), I have found a horrible disease on my chicken. No, it isn't salmonella; worse:
DRY ROT!!

It's gotten that old that the poor thing is dry-rotting, and soon will be rendered useless. SO, I go to the store to get a new one, and guess what? They all have sound boxes in them and cost almost $10!! What happened to the good old days when you could get a quiet little rubber chicken for $3? Do they have to make ALL great toys talk now?

So, in mourning over my rubber chicken, I do make this post. Tomorrow, or soon after I return from my vacation, I will bury my rubber chicken to the scrap yards of the rubber recycling...thing.

*SIGH!* Another great history meets its end, and the closing of a great friendship between me and my rubber chicken is upon us all.

FOZ

 

[Jessie]

Foz

You should cut off one of it's feet to remember it by or something before you bury it.

Just try to find one that is dry-rot-less.

 

[EmmyMik]

You know, I know a store that not only sells rubber chickens, but rubber fish and pigs as well...

Or is it too soon to start talking about "replacements"?

 

[Jessie]

Emmy

I think there has to be a certain "mourning time" for these things :0)

Maybe we should hold a ceremony...

 

[Zack the Dog]

Kevin,I give my condolance

I'm sorry about your rubber chicken, I have a rubber chicken (i got last christmas) and he's really sorry to hear about your chicken too.

Zack)Rowlf the, I guess every rubber chicken ends up in that big used rubber tire in the sky,Dog.

 

[Fozzie Bear]

Thanks...

I appreciate everyone's concern about the Rubber Chicken.

I wouldn't want to cut off its leg or foot cause that would be too...voodooey.

Yeah, I'm gonna have a simple little service for it. Me, Muley, my turtle, Humphrey...

At least I still have my rubber bass from New Orleans. But, it's just not as funnee.

So, Emmy, is that store still selling them---you know, the regular rubber chickens without the sound boxes in 'em?

FOZ

 

[EmmyMik]

Foz

So, Emmy, is that store still selling them---you know, the regular rubber chickens without the sound boxes in 'em?

I wouldn't know. Those chickens are *gasp* hanging. I'm short and can't reach them.

So I can look, but not touch (they keep all of the cool hats out of my reach too)...

 

[Jessie]

Foz

I wouldn't want to cut off its leg or foot cause that would be too...voodooey.

LOL...voodooey...I'm 'putting that on my luggage'...

 

[Fozzie Bear]

Jessie:
On your luggage? Where ya' goin?

Emmy:
Can ya ask 'em about the rubber chickens, please? Also, tell them to lower the hats so you can get to them and that I said so.

FOZ

 

[EmmyMik]

Originally posted by FOZZI3B3AR

Emmy:
Can ya ask 'em about the rubber chickens, please? Also, tell them to lower the hats so you can get to them and that I said so.

FOZ

The next time I go there I will (I'm thinking about getting a rubber fish for myself)...