The Fifth Semi-Annual Muppet Central Awards Ceremony!

[Beauregard]

Bo: While Bunsen's here, maybe he can get us down from this ceiling with a burst of reverse static energy...on the other hand...
Bean: I can get you down with a burst of cute kinetic energy!
Bo: On the other hand...

(Congratulations MuppetCaper!)

 

[theprawncracker]

PRAWNIE: Alright folks—I hope this theater has earthquake insurance. Heeeere’s Sweetums!

(SWEETUMS trounces onstage) (Applause)

SWEETUMS: (gruff laugh) Every year we Muppets put out new merchandise for you, the crazed fans, to purchase—and every year ya keep buyin’ it! (laugh) Well, this year, the MC Awards have decided to honor one of you who’s crazy enough to keep buyin’ it—no matter how bad that merchandise may be! Here are the contenders for the “Too Much Time and Money On Their Hands” award for Biggest Muppet Merchandise Collector…
Foodie
theprawncracker
frogboy
And the MC Award goes to… theprawncracker! What a nut!

ANNOUNCER: theprawncracker accepts this award on behalf of the countless amounts of money he’s spent on Muppet merchandise—and yes, he is nuts.

 

[TogetherAgain]

Lisa: <points at Beau> HUSH! SILENCE! As your QUEEN--of fanfiction--I FORBID you from getting us OFF of this ceiling by means of BUNSEN! ...A ladder, would probably work better. Personally, I have a harness. I just... can't remember whether or not it's attached to anything.

 

[Oscarfan]

Oy, that Big Bird doll! It's back to haunt me!

 

[Beauregard]

Meanwhile...at Prawnie's house...

Beauregard the Janitor from TKO: I don't know why everyone else gets to go to an award ceremony and I get stuck here cleaning Prawnie's bedroom with a dirty old mop and...--Oooh...Hello Muppet Merchandise...Hello Ebay...*looks up sharply at a silhouette* Hello Mrs Pepper. *startled* MRS PEPPER! I wasn't selling Prawnie's stuff on Ebay...

Elsewhere...

Beau, Bo, Bobo: *screaming and running away from demented Big Bird doll*

 

[theprawncracker]

PRAWNIE: (shudders) I have the strangest feeling... as if... my Muppet collection was being... Nah. Can't be. Moving on! Ladies and gentlemen, Beaker, and his translator, Waldo C. Graphic!

(BEAKER fumbles ontstage) (WALDO flies onstage) (Applause)

BEAKER: Mee mo mee me me! Mo mo! Mee me meep me! Meep! Mee mo mee mee Meepmemee! Mmhm! Mee Me!

WALDO: What’d he say…? Eh, beats me! (laughs) But we’re here to present “The Greatest Club For Stalkers” award to the Best Muppeteer Fan Club… whatever that means!

BEAKER: Mee meep!

WALDO: …Right. Anyway… here’re the contenders!
The Richard Hunt Lover’s Club (The RHLC)
Steve Whitmire Admirers Especially His Behind (SWAEHB!)
The Ask Jim Lewis Thread
And the winner is…

BEAKER: Me mee mee mo meep…

WALDO: The RHLC! Congratulations! …Who’s Richard Hunt?

ANNOUNCER: This is the third year in a row The RHLC has taken the win for Greatest Club for stalkers. Accepting this award is the club’s founding member, ReneeLouvier.

 

[Beauregard]

Bo: *now back in normal seating* Did I mention that I've met one of Renee's school friends in Real-life over in the UK?
Beau: *blink*
Bobo: What is this...normal life?

 

[The Count]

*Death glomps his li'l cyber cousin Sara for winning best club honors again. Death glomps Erin, co-president as well.

 

[TogetherAgain]

Lisa: <blinks at seating down below> Oh... You went down there. ...NORMAL LIFE, IS A VERY GOOD CEREAL, EATEN IN A TOWN IN ILLINOIS! ...There's a good college there. Or... so I've heard.

 

[Beauregard]

Bo: Remind me never to be glomped by death...
Bobo: Good thing our weapons got confiscated...
Bo: Yeah, I was gunna talk to you about that...Did they confiscate my Kermit cap, or did I just never own one?