Muppet fic: Once in a Lifetime

[Slackbot]

Huey, Dewey, and Louie would get that reference.

 

[The Count]

And you an Jan win a brownie each.

Now to wait till Gina finishes her fics.

 

[Slackbot]

'Nother little Easter egg: Grape Nehi was the drink that Radar O'Reilly always ordered at Rosie's Bar in M*A*S*H. It's your basic grape flavored soda pop.

 

[Slackbot]

You thought I was done, didn't you? Didn't you?! Well, here are a few extra scenes that I couldn't fit into the main story.

*****

Once in a Lifetime
Part 22: Postscript
by Kim McFarland
​

*****

The scene: a public library. There is a reading in the kids' section. There are about a dozen children, ages ten and younger, of several species. The reader is Janken Fraggle, and he's reading The Beginning of the Armadillos by Rudyard Kipling to the children, often turning the book toward them so they can see the illustrations. One of the children is Molly.

*****

[Miss Piggy, who has been hugging the pageant girls after filming the final segment of Teeny Weeny Queenies, gets back to her feet and speaks to the Director.]

Miss Piggy: I have something for you as well.

[She produces a disc in a jewel case and hands it to her.]

Miss Piggy: This is the footage we shot backstage during last night's show. You can use any of it you like. I'll have the lawyers wrap that up in legalese later today.

Director: [surprised, not sure how to react] Thank you.

Kate: Can we watch it now?

Julie: Yeah! It was so neat!

[The other girls chime in. The Director, quickly overcome by the rhubarb, gives in and finds a laptop attached to a monitor. She puts the disc in, and the kids and their parents gather around. Soon everyone, including the Director and Miss Piggy, are laughing.]

*****

[The Muppet boarding house. Janken walks in. A paper airplane lodges itself in his hair. He picks it out, looks at it quizzically, then sends it on its way without question.]

[Cut to Scooter's room. Scooter is doing something on his tablet. There is a knock with an unusual cadence at the door.]

Scooter: Come in.

[Janken enters. Scooter puts the tablet down.]

Scooter: How was the reading?

Janken: Fine. Molly was there. She gave me a note for you, actually.

[Janken takes a folded piece of paper out of his jacket pocket and holds it out to Scooter.]

Scooter: Huh!

[Scooter takes the paper. A sticker is holding it closed. He carefully peels the sticker up and unfolds the note. He reads it, then, puzzled, shows it to Janken. It says "God believes in you," with a smiley face after the signature "Molly Flander."]

Scooter: It's nice, but I'm not quite sure what she means.

Janken: [smiling] Just means she likes you.

*****

Scooter and Kermit Miss Piggy are copyright © The Muppets Studio, LLC. All copyrighted materials are used without permission but with much respect and affection. Janken, Molly, and Kate are copyright © Kim McFarland (negaduck9@aol.com), as is the overall story. Permission is given by the author to copy it for personal use only.
​

 

[The Count]

: Cute, cute added scenes.

Hope that paper airplane wasn't printed on purple paper. First off, it wouldn't really stick out as much against Jan's hair/fur. Secondly, he's being sent a memo from one of the Ministry of Magic's other offices.

Thanks for posting, neat to read something more from your fics.

 

[Slackbot]

Heh, I was half expecting to be slapped with a dead fish for Molly's last name. I just couldn't resist. Not that I tried especially hard.

 

[The Count]

Eh, I know where her surname comes from... And I'm not a fan of that stuff... But to each their own, so I won't make that big a stink over it. Unless you want to administer the trouttonoggin procedure. Frankly, I would have gone with some cat-pun on the name "Hail/Hale" though I'm not sure if you'd know where that particular reference comes from.

 

[Slackbot]

"That stuff"? Now I'm confused. I was making a Simpsons reference. Single parent, intensely Christian household, y'know. However, her mother doesn't keep her cloistered and ignorant.

 

[The Count]

Yeah, sorry, meant to say "that show". I actually like how Molly's mom came across in the one segment where she had to explain to her daughter what was going on between Scooter and Janken in terms she'd understand. So no, no flak for you tonight.

When do we get to hit her with the dead fish?
You haven't given it a name?
Can't think of anything at the moment. Maybe Kim has ideas for names for a large dead fishbone/skeleton fish.
Eh, couldn't hurt to ask. *Dodges the smackerel tossed back at Lew from the balcony. Hi Billie.

 

[Slackbot]

Oh, OK. I did a bit of Googling, found out about "Moll Flanders," and thought you were referring to that. Not at all!

I was drawing on the Flanders, Ned especially, as they appeared in early seasons, before they degenerated from uber-nice people of strong faith to holier-than-thou bigots. Interestingly, Ned was regressed in The Simpsons Movie back to being a genuinely kind, nonjudgmental soul, and in fact I think that was him at his best. That's the kind of home life I see for Molly.

Heh, I've also mentally compared Molly to Orel Pupptington. However, Molly's family is a better influence on her than poor Orel's.