MC Dorms: Sorry, We're Closed Take 2

[RedPiggy]

Kelly (squeezes Digit's hand, getting up): Well, I'm gonna try to get some shut-eye for a couple of hours.

Cotterpin (waves her arm): I'm staying with Waldo! *glances warily at Pearl*

Pearl (rolls her eyes): You STILL sore 'bout that little misunderstandin', sugah?

 

[RedPiggy]

Kelly (FINALLY got some good sleep): We were trying to enjoy it....

Pearl (nods): I ain't never seen that movie. That movie you were tryin' to show reminded me of my glory days, when I tried to make mahself a star. *puts her hands on her hips* An' I don't mean no disrespect, hon ... but the guy in charge of the projector shoulda kicked the two yahoos who kept messin' with the movie out until our movie was over.

Kelly (to Pearl): Well, don't get US banned ....

Pearl (to Kelly): Darlin', it's been soundin' like we've been on borrowed time as it is. Heck, I just got here an' will probably never see the inside of that buildin'. I've been on the road too long to gripe about having really short gigs. After all, a gig's a gig. But I'm not gonna fool mahself ... I don't smell a long-term career here, sweetie.

 

[Ruahnna]

Back from the brink

(Piggy sashays up the hallway and peeps into the doorway.)
Piggy: Moi though there was going to be a movie.
Kermit: Mfgph. Ith thinth wem ithed--achoo! (Feathers scatter everywhere.)
Piggy: Kermie! You're dragging them again!
(In actuality, Kermit resembles nothing so much as an AM made completely of feathers and fuzz. Something like a sigh wafts up from the depths of the all the feathers.)
Kermit: Ptooh! Yuckth! Piggy--I can't even see where I'm going. How many feather boas does the average person need?
Piggy: (patiently) Moi has no idea how many feather boas the average person needs. Moi, however, needs a good deal more than average. (Sounding pouty.) You should be glad I waited until they were on sale.
Kermit: (dryly) I suppose so. Nice of you to let me pay.
Piggy: (brightening) Moi can be nice. (She bats her long lashes at Kermit, who gulps.)
Kermit: (faintly) Sheesh.
Piggy: Where are the rest of my things?
Kermit: Don't you mean, where are Fozzie and Ru? Probably still unloading the car.
Piggy: (pouty again) It is very inconvenient to have to move out of the dorms. And I thought there was going to be a movie here.
(Ru and Fozzie appear, staggering under the weight of shopping bags.)
Ru: I heard the movie got, um, eaten.
Fozzie: If it was a comedy, I bet it tasted Fun-Nee! Wocka! Wocka!
(Kermit and Ru exchange surprised looks. Not bad comedy for spur of the moment!)
Piggy: (muttering) Why must we always live with weirdos.
Ru: Tell you what--let's drop everything off at the studio and then we'll go find a bite to eat and a movie.
Piggy: Ooh! There's a new cafe at the mall that offers chocolate entrees!
Kermit: (hopefully) There's a Charlie Chaplin retrospective showing at the Vogue.
(Nods and smiles, and much trundling of feathers.)

 

[The Count]

Hubba-wubba-wha? Aunt Ru was/is here? *Hopes she'll stay this time. *Huge smile.

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

(gang's heading out for a picnic)

Storyteller: (checking basket) Does anyone know where the cherry turnovers got to?
Beige: (hunting for sunscreen) Dunno, maybe they went off to watch the cinnamon roll.

(chorus of boos and jeers)

Nora: (filling thermos with lemonade) The ranger's telling everyone to steer clear of the west end for the park for a while. Anyone know why?
Scooter: (putting sandwiches into another basket) Well, remember Crazy Harry's explodaphone from the Memorial Day concert? The one that Bunsen put a vanishing device on?
Erin: (loading plates and cutlery into basket) Yeah, they're still looking for it. Why can't they just use cannons for the 1812 Overture like everyone else?

(gang secures baskets, blanket and gear and heads off for the park)

 

[The Count]

Thank you very much. I appreciate both of you coming to say that. If you guys promise to behave, we can keep the Muppet movie nights on Friday going. *Sticks out hand. Shake on it?

 

[The Count]

Okay boys... *Chops list into pieces, dividing the chores amongst all. And if we get it all done today, we can party later. *The guys trundle off to go about their work.

 

[The Count]

Uncle D scrubbing the bathrooms.

Count vacuuming the halls and rooms.

Me: Folding towels and putting things away in the kitchen areas.

We all live in a capital I.
In the middle of the clouds, in the middle of the sky.

 

[RedPiggy]

Kelly (feels compelled to take a break from Return to Labyrinth so she can eat, making peanut butter sandwiches): Anybody want some?

Pearl: Got anything other than just PB on 'em?

Kelly (shrugs): I like mine plain. Feel free to add your own stuff.

Pearl (grins): Ah, bananas sound real good.

 

[RedPiggy]

Kelly (cracks a whip, but it smacks her in the face): OW!

Pearl (sitting back with a bullhorn and a large glass of iced tea, wearing dark sunglasses): Ahem! Snuggle-muffin! Ya missed a spot!

Kelly (to Pearl): Which one are you talking to?

Pearl (shrugs): Does it matter?