Chapter 13
The Fraggle From Outer Space
Chapter 13
“I don’t care what you say! I’m not coming out!”
Red and Mokey were trying their hand at convincing Boober to come out of his cave.
“Boober, you are being ridiculous!” Red yelled, “What could you possibly have that could be so awful that you’d have to block yourself away?”
“It’s a horrible deadly disease, and the Trash Heap confirmed it!”
“Didn’t we already go through this?” Red groaned, rolling her eyes at the blanket-blocked door. “At the expense of Goldie’s feelings?”
“Back then, I was worried about getting it. Now I’m just preventing it from spreading. So I’m just going to sit right in here until I die so nobody else has to go through this.”
“Oh, how VERY noble of you, Boober.”
“Red, please,” Mokey said, “Boober. Don’t you think you’re being just a little bit silly? You sound just fine to me.”
“Silly? SILLY? Mokey, I have never been further from silly in my LIFE! If I were any less silly, I’d be a rock!”
“I think he’s got rocks in his head,” Red whispered.
“Well, Boober,” Mokey said, “I can’t say we didn’t try.”
The two of them then walked away, leaving Boober to his self-made solitude. He rolled over on his bed and let his mind wander.
“So this is it,” he thought to himself, “This is what it’s like to suffer from an incurable illness. It’s awful, and yet somehow, I always imagined it to feel a lot worse than this.”
He sat up and stared at his feet for a moment.
“Maybe Mokey’s right. Maybe I am just being silly.”
At that moment, Goldie walked by and noticed that the barricade was back up. Confused, she pulled the blanket aside and peeked inside.
“Boober? What’s going on?”
“AH! Goldie!” Boober yelled as he bolted to the door and pushed her back out, “Get back!”
“What the--? Boober?”
“I’m so so sorry, Goldie. I don’t want to hurt your feelings again, but I don’t want anyone else to catch this awful sickness!”
“Sickness? What sickness? What’re you talking about? You look and sound perfectly fine to me.”
“But I feel like I’m going to die!”
“You’re a hypochondriac, too?”
“I am no such thing! My fear of death and disease is perfectly legitimate! And I’m amazed you even know what that word means.”
“Are you saying you think I’m an idiot?”
“NO! No! Nononononono! Of course not! No! Don’t be ridiculous! Why would I suggest such a thing?”
Goldie could tell there was something else going on with Boober and that it had nothing to do with illness, and she was starting to go crazy trying to talk to him about it.
“Boober, what is the matter with you? If you’ve got a problem, then say what it is. Just don’t pretend it’s some kind of disease when it actually isn’t.”
“But it IS a disease! The Trash Heap said so!”
“The Trash Heap told you you were sick?”
“Yes! Yes, she did!”
“You know what? You’re really starting to get on my nerves. I’m gonna go find some really big doozer constructions to vent my rage on, okay? So when and if you decide to jump off your emo train and talk about what your REAL problem is, just let me know.”
“Emo what? I don’t even know what that is! What are you talking about?”
“ARGH! Never mind! I’m leaving!”
“Fine! Leave me alone here to die!”
“You’re NOT dying!”
“Yes I am!”
“ARGH! You are infuriating! You make me wanna...! You make me so...! GOODBYE!”
Goldie marched off with her tail poofed to its max from all the anger she’d built up. When her heavy footsteps finally faded away, Boober breathed a whiney sigh. Then he felt a sort of tightness in his chest and the sudden need to loosen his scarf.
“Oh, now look what I’ve done!” he moaned to himself, “She’s furious with me! And now I feel even worse! Oh, I’m so glad I didn’t tell her that she was the one who gave this to me. Who knows what she would’ve done if I did? Oh, why is this so difficult? I don’t want her to be angry with me, but... But...”
He breathed a resigning sigh and sat down on the rocky floor beside the door.
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“Ah!” Mokey gasped, clasping her hands together, “Boober’s in LOVE?”
“It would certainly appear so,” answered the Trash Heap.
“Head over heals in it,” said Gunge.
“Smitten, even,” Philo added.
“But the way HE put it, you’d think he was dying,” Red commented.
“Unfortunately, he doesn’t know a good thing when he sees one,” the Trash Heap replied.
“Ha! Tell me about it,” Red rolled her eyes.
“Well, I gave him my advice on the matter,” the Trash Heap continued, “Whether or not he took it is his own problem.”
“Can you tell us who it is, Madame Heap?” said Mokey. “The one he’s fallen in love with?”
“Couldn’t tell ya,” she answered, shrugging her large cluttered shoulders.
“I don’t think HE even knew,” Gunge added.
“Guess he was too busy thinkin’ he was sick,” said Philo.
“Oh, poor Boober,” said Mokey. “Thank you, Madame Heap.”
“No problem,” she replied and waved as the two fraggles left.
“Say,” Philo started after they were gone, “Ya think maybe it’s cuz of how we said it?”
“Well, we did tell ‘im he was lovesick.”
“Oh dear,” sighed the Trash Heap, “I fear we may have caused a little more trouble than we bargained for.”
“Want us to go fix it, Marjory?”
“No, I don’t think that’s necessary. I’m certain the fraggles can work this out on their own. And if not, we’ll most certainly be seeing them again sooner or later.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right.”
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“Geez,” Red groaned as they walked, “Leave it to Boober to take something like love and twist it into something awful.”
“Oh, but Red. He doesn’t realize what it is yet. He probably still thinks it actually IS something awful.”
“Even though the Trash Heap TOLD him that it wasn’t?”
“Well, you know how he is.”
“Yeah. He’s boring, paranoid, and thinks everything’s a disease.”
“And that’s why we have to help him.”
“We? Oh no, Mokey. No thanks. I’m sittin’ this one out. If Boober wants to make himself miserable about this, that’s his own problem. I’m gonna go do something productive. And a whole lot more fun.”
“Oh? And what’s that?”
“Try and break the world record for biggest splash in a fraggle pond.”
“Oh. Well, I’m sure if anyone can do it, you can, Red.”
“Yup, that’s why I’m trying it.”
“I do wonder though who it is Boober’s in love with.”
“Whoever it is, I sure hope it’s somebody he gets along with.”
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“AAAAAAUUUUUGGHH! RAH! AH! HIYAH!”
Cotterpin watched in awe from behind a nearby boulder as the furious pale yellow fraggle rampaged through the massive collection of doozer constructions.
“That JERK!” Goldie yelled and smashed some more, “That STUPID, STUPID, STUPID JERK! RRRRR!”
“I cannot believe my eyes,” she said to herself. “I’ve never seen a fraggle this mad before.”
“Cotterpin Doozer!” called an angry-sounding elder voice from directly behind her.
She turned around to see the Chief Architect Doozer impatiently tapping his toe at her. The only other doozer that wore a visor instead of a helmet. An old ratchety male of white hair and moustache. He was one of the oldest doozers on the workforce, and also one of the toughest to work for.
“Cotterpin, where have you been? Your absence has caused a panic amongst your family and friends, not to mention your mentor, which would namely be ME! How in the name of all Doozerdom do you ever expect to become a respectable Chief Architect if you abandon your duties to go watch fraggles?”
“But, Mister Architect, sir,” Cotterpin whispered, “This is the one I was telling you about. The one that’d never seen doozers before, remember? She’s right over there. Look at her.”
“Cotterpin, we don’t have time for this nonsense! There’s work to be done, and plans to be drawn!”
“Oh, alright.”
She hung her head and followed the old doozer away, both taking glances at the raging force they were leaving behind.
“GOHDZEELAAAAAH!” she screamed as she bit into one of the taller towers and broke it to pieces, while also swinging her arms and knocking down several nearby towers in the process. “RAAARRRRR!”
“Although, I must say, Cotterpin, that she is definitely a strange one,” the Architect commented, “Even for a fraggle.”
“I told you she was, didn’t I?”
“Yes, and if she carries on like that all the time, we can only hope she stays around longer.”
And with that, they continued on home, leaving Goldie to her rampage.
“HA!” she yelled as she kicked down the last of the standing constructions and then pointed at it, “Take that, pent up emotion!”
She spent the next few moments panting, hands on her hips, as she looked around at the path of destruction she laid.
“Well, I feel better now,” she panted, “That was quite a workout.”
She sat down amongst the piles of broken doozer sticks so she could rest and think. Then she figured while she was there, she’d go ahead and munch on the spoils of her personal war.
“These doozers are geniuses, I swear,” she said as she crunched, “Good for eating AND taking out your anger. I don’t even remember what I was so mad about.”
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“Boober,” Mokey sing-songed from outside Boober’s room, “Oh, Boober.”
“Yes, Mokey.”
“I brought you some good news.”
“If it’s not a cure for my ailment, then I don’t want to hear it.”
“But Boober, you don’t HAVE an ailment. I just spoke with the Trash Heap, and she says you’re perfectly fine.”
“What do you mean ‘perfectly fine’? She told me I was lovesick. How is that perfectly fine?”
“Well, that’s just it, Boober. Lovesickness isn’t a disease. You’re just in love. That’s all.”
There was a long silence, and then Boober’s head appeared from behind the blanket, a very confused look adorned on his face.
“In love? You think I’m in love?”
“Well, that’s what lovesickness is, Boober,” she explained and leaned closer to him. “The feeling of being in love.”
The tightness in Boober’s chest suddenly felt tighter.
“And this is GOOD news?”
“Oh, Boober. I envy you so. I wish I could experience it for myself. Being in love is a wonderful thing.”
“If it’s so wonderful, then why does it feel so awful?”
“Well, that’s because you’re feeling it by yourself, silly. For love to really feel wonderful, the one you’re in love with must also be in love with you. Joined together in beautiful harmony. Hand in hand, tail to tail. And the best part is when you truly know you’ve found your one true love, the two of you will always sing songs together, even when you’re worlds apart.”
“You’ve really given this a lot of thought, haven’t you?”
“It is my dream.”
“Yeah, well, it isn’t mine.”
He stepped back inside and began to take his blankets back down.
“All this hand in hand, tail to tail stuff just sounds silly. I don’t want any of it.”
“But why not?”
“Mokey, this love thing might be well and good for you, but to me it’s just a nuisance. It’s because of all this that Goldie’s so angry with me right now.”
“Oh, so it’s Goldie?”
“Gng!” Boober stuttered as his face turned nearly as red as his hair. “I uh, well. Um. You see. It’s, um...”
“Aw, Boober.”
Mokey walked in and placed her hand on his shoulder.
“It’s okay. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
“Mokey, please don’t tell anyone, especially Goldie. Her opinion of me already isn’t all that great. I don’t want it to get any worse if she finds out.”
“Don’t you worry, Boober,” she said and made a zipper motion over her lips, “My lips are sealed. No one will know.”
He breathed a sigh of relief.
“But I want you to promise me something, Boober.”
“What’s that?”
“Promise me that you’ll tell her yourself.”
“What?”
“Trust me, Boober. You’ll feel a lot better if you do.”
“How can I take your word for it if you’ve never done it before?”
She leaned lower and brought her face closer to his.
“Promise me, Boober.”
“Alright! Alright! I promise! ...I’ll tell her.”
“Good,” she said as she patted him on the head and turned to leave. “I’ll leave you to it, then.”
She trotted out of the room and out of sight. Boober lifted a finger to his chin as he thought.
“I can’t decide if this is better or worse than having a fatal illness, especially with Goldie being as mad at me as she is.”
He walked over to his bed and laid himself down in it.
“Maybe if I sleep on this, I’ll be able to think of what I’m gonna do. Although, I doubt I’ll get any sleep with all these uncomfortable feelings I’m having.”
He let out a sigh as he adjusted himself on the bead, falling asleep almost immediately as his head hit the pillow.