Fan-Fic: We Know That It's Probably Magic

[theprawncracker]

Thanks Lisa! More story to come tomorrow. Tonight I'm embarking on a new adventure. It's a new top secret story. I won't post it until this one's finished of course, but I'll have some of it done by then!

 

[redBoobergurl]

Just got caught up, you had posted two chapters that I hadn't had the pleasure of reading yet. Anyway, I love the two plotlines going on! I mean, I know the Cinderella thing is a dream, but you're playing it out so well! I loved the whole scene with the Fairy Godwhatever! And I really loved the scene when Death came in and everyone was chattering in typical Muppet style. Great, great stuff, can't wait to see more!!!!

 

[Beauregard]

Thanks Lisa! More story to come tomorrow. Tonight I'm embarking on a new adventure. It's a new top secret story. I won't post it until this one's finished of course, but I'll have some of it done by then!

*points* You sir have another thing to finish before you start on any more Muppet mayhem...nice aliteration..

And Nice Nice Nice cinderella story!!!! And, lovely remarks to ye old' death! Everything is Muppety to an extreme!!!

 

[theprawncracker]

Chapter 14: The Frog Prince

Uncle Deadly held his hands behind his back. He surveyed the troops. Fozzie, Gonzo, Traveling Matt, Grover, and Rowlf stood in a group. "So, I take it you five will be accompinying us into the pig?" Uncle Deadly asked.

"Yes sir!" Traveling Matt saluted. "I'm always open to explore the new frontier!"

Robin sat in the back of the theater. He hadn't said a word to anyone for hours. "It's not easy bein' green." Robin said to himself. "But, green can be big, and important, and tall." Robin sat up straight. "I'm going to!" Robin yelled.

The Muppet's all turned to Rboin. "I am sorry little frog," Uncle Deadly told him. "Only five people may accompany Death and myself."

"Why?" Robin asked. "I'm small! I won't take up to much room!"

"SILENCE BOY." Death said with his chilling voice. "THOSE ARE THE RULES, AND THOSE THEY SHALL REMAIN."

Uncle Deadly whispered to The Count. "Such a wonderful leader isn't he?"

Rowlf watched Robin sulk back down into the chair. He wiped his eyes. "I'll stay back then." Rowlf said. "They need me here for the show. Cliff and Scooter can't do it without me."

"Alfright then." Uncle Deadly agreed. "Rowlf may stay, and Robin may come."

"Hooray!" Robin cheered. He ran up next to the others. "Thanks Rowlf." He hugged him.

"No problem Robin. Just do me a favor," Rowlf patted his back. "Bring your uncle home."


"Thank you driver, this should be fine." Piggy said as she slowly emerged from her zuchinni limo.

The flashes and noise was amazing when Piggy got out of the car. She walked down the red carpet. "Hello all you beautiful people you! Moi am Miss...Cinderella!" She smiled and waved to the crowds.

"This is Lewis Kazzagar from the wide world of Muppet newscasting!" Lewis Kazzagar said as he walked in front of Piggy. "And this is my co-anchor Mr. M. Newsman!"

"Thank you Lewis." The Muppet Newsman straightened his glasses. "Tonight's top story is shooting stars! Recently, many stars have been shooting! Just caught on tape was Will Smith, he was shooting hoops at a local basketball court in downtown Los Angeles." The Newsman said. "Wait, this just in!" He held his earpiece. "It seems that a shooting star covered in sparkling light is headed right in my general direction!" The Newsman looked up. "All this reporter has to say about that is, not likely."

As soon as the Newsman said that, a sparkling shooting star fell on top of him. The Fairy Godwhatever emerged. "Oops, this isn't downtown Los Angeles." He looked at the flattened Newsman. "Oh, sorry about that." The Fairy Godwhatever backed the sparkling star off the Newsman and into the sky.

The Newsman sat up slowly. His glasses were broke and his hair messed up. "And all this reporter has to say about this," he said dazed. "Is, ow!" He fell on his back.

"Well thank you for that Mr. Newsman." Lewis Kazzagar said. "Now, back to the red carpet. Look there! It's...It's...Who is that?" He asked into the camera.

"Moi am Cinderella. Would vous like an interview?" Miss Piggy asked him.

"Oh yes please if you have time!" Lewis said.

"Um..." She tapped her foot. Then she glanced at the huge clock. It was already 8:49. "Oh, sorry dear, moi must get into the ball sorry!" She ran off into the castle.


"Ready Dr. Honeydew?" Uncle Deadly asked.

"Ready!" Piggy sat in the Muppet Labs Memory Projectatron.

"Good. Take it away Boss." Uncle Deadly motioned to Death.

Death waved his scythe. It opened a hole in the atmosphere. "ENTER." He ordered the Muppets.

"Well, sounds like great fun!" Traveling Matt said. "Goodbye Nephew Gobo! I will send postcards!" He walked into the hole.

The projector lit and sent Piggy's dream onto the wall backstage. Matt was seen in the projection.

"Hey it's Uncle Matt!" Gobo pointed at the projection.

"NEXT." Death said.

"I Su-per Grover will enter next!" Grover said. "I'm coming Froggy babieeee!" He charged into the hole.

He ran onto the projection and inot Traveling Matt. "Oh excuse me furry creature." Uncle Matt dusted himself off. "Have we met?" He asked.

"KEEP IT MOVING." Death told them.

"Looks like fun!" Gonzo said. He ran in.

Fozzie picked up Robin. "Ready Robin?" Fozzie asked.

"Ready Fozzie."

"Be careful little buddy!" Sweetums called.

"I will be Sweetums."

"Good luck guys!" Big Bird said.

Fozzie and Robin walked through the hole. "That's five, five heroes! Ah ah ah!" The Count laughed.

"We shall return." Uncle Deadly told them. "Make sure there is someone watching the projection at all times." He began to walk through the hole.

"Hey spook!" Dr. Teeth called. Uncle Deadly turned to him. "Bring our frog back." Dr. Teeth told him.

Uncle Deadly nodded. He walked through the hole followed closely by Death.

The seven of them stood in front of the castle. "THE PLAN IS SIMPLE." Death told them. "YOU FIVE WILL FIND THE PIG." He motioned to Fozzie, Gonzo, Grover, Matt, and Robin. "AND WE SHALL FIND THE FROG. UNDERSTAND?"

The Muppets nodded. The plan was underway.


Kermit watched the ball below. The honored geusts entered.

The trumpets blared. "Now presenting the honorable Lew Zealand. Archduke of New Zealand!" A man told the atendees.

"Ahh! I'm Lew Zealand! And this," he pointed to a fish in his hand. "Is Darla! My boomerang fish! I throw her away!" He threw her away. "And she comes back to me!" She came back to him and he caught it in his hand. "Ah ha ha ha!" He pointed to the fish.

"Out of my way! Move it fish boy!" Piggy pushed forward.

Kermit peered down at her. She was finally here. Her beauty was radiant as ever. And it was now time.

"Ah sire! I see that girl there has caught your eye!" Fozzie walked in wearing a very dignified robe. "Could she be the one?"

"Yes. She's the one. She always has been." Kermit said. "And after tonight, she always will be."

 

[redBoobergurl]

Excellent. My favorite parts in this chapter were with Robin. I love the "Being Green" lines he used. And I love Rowlf for agreeing to stay back so Robin could help find his Uncle. So touching. And there's still humorous stuff going on here too! This is one of the most interesting fan fics I've ever read and I mean that in a good way!

 

[Beauregard]

W-O-W!!! This is the best cinderella story i ever read! And also a very creepy story...

 

[theprawncracker]

Ok, I'll be posting a new chapter tonight, even though some people still haven't gotten to read the latest one yet. *cough* Lisa *cough* But anyway, next chapter in my next post!

 

[TogetherAgain]

I've read, I've read, I've just been really cruel and not commented. You see when I read it last night, I was just coming off the fast- you know what the first thing I ate was? A muffin. And boy, was it delicious!- So yes, I was just coming off the fast, and realizing I was behind with my homework, so I was in that sort of overwhelmed exhaustion that comes after a big Jewish holiday I miss school for, and then I read that chapter and it was all powerful and like FWOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH! And my ability to communicate was temporarily severly impaired.

But I'm better now! I actually got to eat today! Do you have any idea how wonderful the concept of food is?- sorry, muffining myself again. I love it! And by the way, the impairment of my ability to communicate began at about this point, right here:

"No problem Robin. Just do me a favor," Rowlf patted his back. "Bring your uncle home."

OOH! SHIVERS! Shiver shiver shiver shiver shiver!

More please.

 

[theprawncracker]

Chapter 15: Cheating Death

The five Muppets wandered the ballroom aimlessly looking for Miss Piggy.

"I think we should ask one of those silent creatures over there the strange creatures are sitting on." Traveling Matt suggested.

"But those are chairs, not silent creatures." Grover told him.

"Come on guys let's try and stay focussed!" Fozzie said. "We have to find Kermit!"

"Wow! Check out that fire eater!" Gonzo pointed.

"Really? Where? It sounds astounding, but tell me, how much water does one drink before eating fire?" Matt asked.

"Guys!" Fozzie said.


"Oh I do hope they're careful!" Bunsen said as he watched the Muppets on the projection.

"Man, they've been through worse. And this time, they've got Death with 'em! Nothin's gonna stop 'em now!" Floyd said.

"Right," Scooter said. "Now, the show starts in two hours! We've got some last minute rehearsing." Scooter looked at his clipboard. "Gosh I hope their back before the show starts!"

"Man, we practically can't do the show without 'em." Clifford sighed.

"All this sadness and greif makes me hungry." Oscar told them. "I'm gonna go see if there's a rotten anchovie sandwich outside." He left the room.

"Hey Mokey, where'd you say the Trash Heap was staying?" Gobo asked Mokey.

"Oh, she's right outside!" Mokey said softly.


Piggy mingled in the crowd. She couldn't see Kermit anywhere.


Meanwhile, Death and Uncle Deadly were having the same luck.

"I'M RUNNING A VERY TIGHT SCHEDULE." Death told the phantom.

Uncle Deadly turned his head towards him. "I know Boss, don't worry. We'll find him fright away." I hope. He thought.

"WE BETTER. OR YOU'LL PAY FOR IT."

This won't be the first time. He thought to himself. "Right. No more lasagna for me."

"YOU'VE CHANGED DEADLY." Death peered down at him from his cloak. "YOU USED TO BE POSITIVELY SCARY. BUT NOW, YOU'VE GOT A SENSE OF HUMOR."

"Friends will change you sir." Uncle Deadly said to him. "As will death."

"HMM, INDEED. I HAVE CHANGED MANY MEN."

"And frogs." Uncle Deadly whispered to himself.


Oscar dug through a pile of trash. "This is great stuff here!" He said.
"Oh I love trash!
Anything dirty or dingy or dusty!
Anything ragged or rotten or rusty!
Yes, I love trash!"

The pile of trash began to move. "Hey what are you doing with my stuff?" The Trash Heap asked.

"Who are you?" Oscar asked her.

Two rats emerged from the trash. "You sir are in the pressence of the all knowing," the green one said.

"Trash Heap! Nyeeeeeah!" Both the green and pink rat said.

"Thank you boys, now shut it! This is my only number!" Marjorie the Trash Heap said.
"I have here a sneaker that's tattered and worn
It's all full of holes, and the laces are torn!
A gift from my mother the day I was born!" She sang.

"Oh we love trash!" Oscar and Marjorie harmonized.

"Anything dirty or dingy or dusty!
Anything ragged or rotten or rusty!" Philo and Gunge; the rats; sang.

"Yes, we love trash!" They all sang.

"I have here some newspaper thirteen months old!
I've wrapped fish inside and it's smelly and cold.
But I wouldn't trade it for a big pot of gold!
I love it because it's trash!" Marjorie sang.

"Oh we love trash!
Anything dirty or dingy or dusty!
Anything ragged or rotten or rusty!
Yes we love trash!" The four of them sang.

"You've a clock that won't work and an old telephone!" Oscar sang.

"A broken umbrella!" Philo sang.

"And a rusty trombone!" Gunge continued.

"And I am delighted to call them my own!
I love them because their trash!" Marjorie sang.

"Oh we love trash!
Anything dirty or dingy or dusty!
Anything ragged or rotten or rusty!
Yes we love," They all sang. "We love, oh we love trash!" They finished.

"Well that was fun." Marjorie said. "Now, what have you come to me for eh?"

"Me? Oh I just came for a sardine sandwich. You got one?" Oscar asked.

"What? You mean you didn't come to me for advice? I'm the all-knowing Trash Heap!" She said.

"Nyeeeeeah!" The rats said.

"That's enough boys." She told them. "Now there must be something I can give you advice about."

"Well, I geuss we're all kinda grouchy that Kermit's gone. Not that I don't mind, but I was wondering, how can the others um...you know, cope with him being gone?" Oscar asked the all-knowing Trash Heap. Nyeeeeeah.

"Ah, that's a very good question Mr. Grouch." Marjorie told him. "Now, sit back, this may take a few moments."


Kermit watched Death from his balcony. "No, not now, he can't be here now!" Kermit said.

"What's wrong sire?" Count Fozzie asked.

"Nothing. I'm going to the dance floor. If she," he pointed to Piggy. "Leaves, follow her. And get her slipper." Kermit ran off.

"What? Her slipper? But how am I supposed to...Oh never mind." He sat in Kermit's chair.

 

[TogetherAgain]

Oh that is PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!! Oscar and Marjorie singing "I love trash"- I applaud! Okay so I laugh and THEN applaud, but I APPLAUD!

And Matt wants to ask the chairs. Perfect.

And the conversation between UD and Death. It is... ooh. Something... something big is here. I can feel it. There is some sort of priceless gem hiding beneath the cloak of that conversation. I can feel it there, I can see the approximate shape of it, but I can't quite... I don't quite know what it is, what it looks like... but it is there, isn't it?

Oh. And this line? This line right here?

"What? Her slipper? But how am I supposed to...Oh never mind." He sat in Kermit's chair.

Yeah. That's good. I love that. Lovely. And ever so, so very, FUNNY!