Amazon? Moi?

[The Count]

*Sigh... If only you'd post more story Beaky. *Stops hurled penguin. Hey! No penguin hits Beaky Squekama! And we naggers gotta stick together.
*Produces nagging stic to get Toga updating.

 

[TogetherAgain]

Chapter Two

The Muppets back at the base at the edge of the jungle did not very much feel like sleeping.

They huddled around, watching as Kermit paced... and paced... and paced...

"...I can't believe they stopped the search!" he finally said bitterly. "Just because it's NIGHTTIME doesn't mean she's not still OUT THERE! And if it's TOO dangerous for their GUIDES then-" He stopped himself there and dropped onto the floor. "Not thinking about that," he mumbled.

"Si, dis is a very convincing show of not t'inking about dat," Pepe mumbled dryly. The Muppets sighed heavily.

"...We should probably get some sleep," Rowlf said softly. "We can't really do any-"

"We can hope," Kermit said firmly. "We can- ...We can..."

"...We will need the rest, Kermit," Rowlf said softly, gently. "If we're gonna go in there again tomorrow..."

Kermit was quiet for a long, long moment. "...I'm not losing anyone else," he whispered faintly.

They shifted in a heavy, uneasy silence.

"...Guys... they already told us that we can't help with the search," Kermit whispered. "And if we go out there with what's planned, then it's that many less guides they'll have looking for Piggy. And- ...And I can't- risk- any more."

They bit their lips and hung their heads and shifted uneasily.

It was going to be a very long night.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

Miss Piggy woke to find that she was still very tightly wrapped up in her little ball, with no sign of any light that she could see. What had woken her?

Her ears pricked up. A sound...

Oh... Oh dear. Soft plodding... sounded like... footsteps...

...Footsteps... coming closer... Friend or foe? Friend or foe? Friend or foe? ...Would they bother looking for her at night? ...Was it still night? She wouldn't know until she lifted her head… which she didn't want to do until she knew what kind of creature this was approaching.

The footsteps came and went, passing a little over ten feet to her right. She slowly lifted her head and looked over her shoulder.

It was still dark, still oh so very dark, but as her eyes adjusted, she was slowly, faintly able to make out four legs and a tail slinking away. Foe, then. And night, when they probably couldn't look, for the reasons why she had chosen to stop walking.

She bit her lip and slowly tucked her head back down with a hard gulp. Her stomach informed her that as soon as some daylight did choose to trickle through the leaves, she would have to open that book and look around for something to eat.

She did not fall asleep again, instead listening intently to her quiet breaths and heartbeat, straining to hear any new or foreign sounds, peeking up over her knees to see when there was enough light to function.

When she decided that there was enough light, she took her pack off and reached inside to pull out the book. She could read the words, but the pictures seemed such a vital thing, and just now, everything was just black and gray and dim... Food would have to wait. She replaced the book in the pack and took a swallow of water. There wasn't much of that left...

With a quiet sigh, she slung the pack onto her back, reluctantly stood up, and slowly, carefully, studiously, began to pick her way forward.

It seemed like a long, long time before the light reached any point of usefulness. She paused to pull out the book and began inspecting the plants around her as she walked past them.

These leaves are edible. These leaves are edible. These leaves are edible.

Wasn't there anything to eat besides leaves?

Surely, she would reach civilization soon, anyway. How far away could she be? And they would be looking for her now...

These leaves are not only edible, but contain a great deal of water, and can help treat or prevent dehydration if consumed.

...Well... How bad could a leaf taste, anyway? It was just like salad, without the dressing, right? She carefully examined the plant in the picture, and compared it with the one sitting next to her. After a seemingly sufficient amount of scrupulation, she plucked a leaf and ate it.

...This salad desperately needed dressing, and croutons, and tomatoes, and maybe a few pieces of chicken...

She sighed and ate another leaf. Hm… The book said that the leaves dried quickly and lost their hydrating powers, but were very easy to find in-

...In the deeper parts of the jungle.

She looked around. There seemed to be a lot of these plants around.

...Oh. How very, very encouraging.

She bit her lip. Had she gone the wrong way? ...Well, clearly, she had done something wrong at some point, or she wouldn't have ended up alone in the rainforest to begin with.

Still... If she walked in one direction for long enough, she would get out of this jungle eventually, right? Logic said so, anyway. The old riddle was that a dog could only run halfway into the woods, because if he ran any farther, he was running out of them. And after all, if the rainforests really were shrinking more and more every day, then how big could this one be?

She took a deep breath and kept walking.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

She was more aware when darkness began to fall than she had been the previous night.

...Whom was she kidding? Darkness didn't fall in here. It was always dark. The darkness just thickened.

...Well, when darkness began to thicken, she was very much aware that she didn't want to spend another night completely exposed, just praying for safety. Actually constructing a shelter, though, did not seem practical at all. For one thing, she had little to no experience in construction, and she didn't particularly care to put untold amounts of effort into a shelter that she would just have to abandon in the morning.

She carefully inspected a big tree and crouched down in front of it. It wasn't a terrific shelter, but it was more than she'd had the previous night.

But now that she was fairly comfortable with her ability to recognize a few edible plants, particularly the water one, she would have to spend her walking time the next day trying to think up a better solution... just in case this wasn't her last night out here.

She settled in between the thick roots of the tree and looked at the ground in front of her. After some thought, she plucked out a few twigs and constructed an arrow in the direction she had been walking. Then, with a heavy sigh, she curled up and watched as the darkness engulfed her.

 

[The Count]

And now... To wait and watch as the replies engulf this story until the author decides to update again. You know, I can't help but feel there'll be another recognizable Muppet character in this, the Amazon, the largest rain forest in the worl making an appearance sooner or later. But I don't want to spoil it for others if this speculation proves true. So I'll just say...

More please!

 

[redBoobergurl]

Nice to see you writing again, I wish I could say more, but I just don't have as much time to do so these days.

 

[theprawncracker]

Lisa, as promised, here it is!

They huddled around, watching as Kermit paced... and paced... and paced...

He'll wear a hole into the jungle floor!

"...I can't believe they stopped the search!" he finally said bitterly. "Just because it's NIGHTTIME doesn't mean she's not still OUT THERE! And if it's TOO dangerous for their GUIDES then-" He stopped himself there and dropped onto the floor. "Not thinking about that," he mumbled.

I remember one time, Lisa, you talking about trying to decide if, in your writing style, you used italics, caps, or underlined to put emphasis on words. Well, Kermit must be REALLY emphasizing this to have both caps AND italics!

"...We will need the rest, Kermit," Rowlf said softly, gently. "If we're gonna go in there again tomorrow..."

I love that Rowlf is keeping calm and being a rock for the frog, that's very important in this time. *hugs Rowlf*

Kermit was quiet for a long, long moment. "...I'm not losing anyone else," he whispered faintly.

...Wow... *shifts uneasily*

They shifted in a heavy, uneasy silence.

Copy Muppets...

...Footsteps... coming closer... Friend or foe? Friend or foe? Friend or foe? ...Would they bother looking for her at night? ...Was it still night? She wouldn't know until she lifted her head… which she didn't want to do until she knew what kind of creature this was approaching.

Wow... it's very humbling, for some reason, to see Piggy scared.

She bit her lip and slowly tucked her head back down with a hard gulp. Her stomach informed her that as soon as some daylight did choose to trickle through the leaves, she would have to open that book and look around for something to eat.

GAH! Someone SAVE her! She does not belong there, can't you see that? !

When she decided that there was enough light, she took her pack off and reached inside to pull out the book. She could read the words, but the pictures seemed such a vital thing, and just now, everything was just black and gray and dim... Food would have to wait. She replaced the book in the pack and took a swallow of water. There wasn't much of that left...

GAHHHHHHHHHHH! ! ! Piggy! Ugh, this is just awful! ! ! Under NO circumstances should Miss PIGGY be in THESE circumstances!

Surely, she would reach civilization soon, anyway. How far away could she be? And they would be looking for her now...

*gulp* I don't wanna know the answer to that...

...This salad desperately needed dressing, and croutons, and tomatoes, and maybe a few pieces of chicken...

Hehehe... that is so Piggy...

Still... If she walked in one direction for long enough, she would get out of this jungle eventually, right? Logic said so, anyway. The old riddle was that a dog could only run halfway into the woods, because if he ran any farther, he was running out of them. And after all, if the rainforests really were shrinking more and more every day, then how big could this one be?/QUOTE]
GAH! Poor, poor Piggy! I feel sooooo bad for her, and I just KNOW she isn't fooling herself with all of this reassuring talk.

She settled in between the thick roots of the tree and looked at the ground in front of her. After some thought, she plucked out a few twigs and constructed an arrow in the direction she had been walking. Then, with a heavy sigh, she curled up and watched as the darkness engulfed her.

UGH! This seems like SUCH a hopeless situation--what would you DO in a situation like this? I'm certain I'd have NO idea! GAH! But that's why Piggy's so much stronger than me! You'll be alright, Piggy, I just know it. ...Right, Lisa? ...Lisa?

MORE PLEEEEEEASE!

 

[TogetherAgain]

Nice to see you writing again, I wish I could say more, but I just don't have as much time to do so these days.

<Hugs!> I completely understand, Beth! Busy lives don't leave much room for story time, unfortunately, but it was nice to see you update today. <More HUGS!>

And speaking of busy... My sister's wedding is a week from tomorrow, so if I'm not around much... that will be among the reasons why.

Which reminds me... <GLOMP!> Prawnie, I know you promised it anyway, but you have NO idea how much I needed that today. Especially the quote names. (Or lack of them.) Thank you.

And Ed... if you're thinking what I think you're thinking, it's quite thoughtful of you to not share your thoughts, as other thinkers will start thinking those thoughts instead of the thoughts I think they should think or they think they should think, and then all the thinking is thoughtlessly thought. ...I think I confused myself. I don't even know what I'm saying anymore. But give me a break; it's been a long day.

 

[The Count]

Yeah... And with three minds, that's a hard thing to do. *Laughs and huggles Toga.
More please?

 

[TogetherAgain]

So... I was not at all planning to post today... But I WAS planning on working out now... and... Dad's working out now... And last I checked, two people can't use one treadmill at the same time. (Especially since he goes WAY faster than I do, and sets it at an incline, SHEESH!) So, while I'm waiting my turn...

 

[TogetherAgain]

Chapter Three

Kermit hugged his knees to his chest and stared out into the thick jungle.

Miss Piggy had now spent two full nights in there, and a full day, and half of one day before that, and now, the morning was quickly flying by, and…

How had they lost her, anyway?

...Well, however she had gotten lost, even if she had walked away from the group, she would find a way to make it his fault, and she would never let him live it down. She would come out here, and complain on and on about all the horrors she'd had to face, making the small ones into huge ones and scarcely mentioning the true dangers. Yup. That was what Miss Piggy would do.

He sighed heavily. She would come out soon, wouldn't she?

She would come out, and demand a multi-course meal from the nearest five-star restaurant, and a good long rest at the nearest five-star hotel, and…

Yup. Any minute now, she'd come barreling out of that jungle, probably with the carcass of some deadly beast that had gotten in her way slung over her shoulder...

Any minute now.

Any minute now...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

These fruits are edible, but unfortunately are only found well above human reach. Luckily, these trees are fairly easy to climb, especially with bare feet.

Miss Piggy looked up at the fruits high, high above her head. It was hard to know from here, but they looked like the ones in the book, and the tree seemed to match the description, too.

Good. A little fruit for this perpetual salad.

She put the book in the pack and the pack on her back. She gripped the nearest branch and hauled herself up.

Her boot slipped on the bark as she tried to stand up, and she found herself trying to hug the trunk for balance. She looked down at her feet.

The bark was smooth, and gave her boots very little to grip on. Bare feet, though, with plain old fashioned skin...

She sighed. "Lousy book's always right," she muttered. She carefully straddled the branch, untied her boots, and slid them off with the intention of tying the laces together, to hang around her neck, and keep the boots with her.

Gravity, however, had other plans. She felt herself starting to lose her balance, and instinctively gripped the trunk, dropping both boots to do so.

She watched them fall back to the ground beneath her, and sighed. "...I'll get 'em when I get down," she muttered, and she pulled herself up to climb on.

It was much easier now, with her feet free to curve a little better, toes gripping each branch, and occasionally the trunk. Up, and up, and up...

Her hands were getting sweaty in these lousy suede gloves. That wasn't much help. Halfway to the fruit, she sighed, straddled a branch, pulled the gloves off, and tucked them in a pocket. This outfit had lots of pockets, and only two were occupied- one with the gloves now, and another with her passport and money, items far too precious to leave in some old hut on base. She was beginning to be glad she had brought them. It certainly looked like she wasn't going to go home from the scheduled place at the scheduled time.

After a great deal of climbing, she finally got to the fruit. She sighed heavily, straddled a branch, and carefully inspected the fruit. Yes, it looked like the one in the book. She took a small bite.

...It was good enough. She hungrily devoured it, and made short work of a second and third.

Some of those water leaves would have been nice about now. Perhaps they were an acquired taste. Feeling more full than she had in some time, she began her climb down.

As she neared the bottom, her hands began to ache. The bark was smooth, but it was a far cry from silk. With a sigh, she paused to straddle a branch and pulled the suede gloves out of her pocket.

As she did so, she froze, realizing two things.

First, she was much closer to the ground than she had thought she was. In fact, she was on the bottom branch.

Second, a very big snake had arrived since she had begun to climb, and it now had a loop around one of her boots, and was giving her a look that she was fairly certain roughly translated as, "You're too close. Now you die." Its head was slowly rising, probably preparing to strike...

She dropped the gloves and pulled her feet onto the branch and grabbed the next branch and hauled herself onto it and climbed another branch and another and another and another and then dared to glance down.

The snake had struck, and had one of her gloves in its mouth, and was slowly settling back to the ground.

She climbed another branch, just for safety's sake, and straddled it with her back against the trunk.

She stayed there for some time and caught her breath, not minding the uncomfortable feeling of her pack pressed between her and the tree.

Climbing down this tree was, painfully plainly, not an option.

Holding still wasn't much of an option, either. Holding still meant not getting any of those water leaves, and not getting out of this place.

She needed to get out of this place.

If she were going to do so, she would have to do two things. She would have to keep herself far more alert, and she would have to know her enemies.

She very carefully shifted her weight, and very carefully removed her pack, and very carefully settled back against the trunk. She took out the book and opened it to the first page. Then, with her ears perked and her nerves sensitive, she began to read.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~​

The native guides had agreed that when they went out into the jungle to search for Miss Piggy, they would mentally treat it like the first day, and put forth all of their effort, and set aside the actual odds.

When they were back at base, however, out of sight and sound from the Muppets, it was their time to release their frustration.

"De frog does not understand de danger," one of them sighed with a shake of his head. "It's a standing rule. If dey spend one night out dere, dat's de end. We maybe search another day, but only one! Dis will be her third night out dere, if she still out dere. Why we still looking?"

"They say she's a tough cookie," said another. "And, the man they work for pays us."

"Only to de end of de week," said the first. "Den dey go home. Den dey know. Only two days more."

 

[theprawncracker]

Kermit hugged his knees to his chest and stared out into the thick jungle.

*Hugs Kermit*

Miss Piggy had now spent two full nights in there, and a full day, and half of one day before that, and now, the morning was quickly flying by, and…

*Hugs Kermit again* These thoughts are not very conduscive to the well being of the frog.

How had they lost her, anyway?

VERY good question...

...Well, however she had gotten lost, even if she had walked away from the group, she would find a way to make it his fault, and she would never let him live it down. She would come out here, and complain on and on about all the horrors she'd had to face, making the small ones into huge ones and scarcely mentioning the true dangers. Yup. That was what Miss Piggy would do.

Yeah! That's what she'll do, for sure! ...Oh, wait, this is one of Lisa's stories. ...Never mind.

He sighed heavily. She would come out soon, wouldn't she?

He must not know the length of Swamp Call...

She would come out, and demand a multi-course meal from the nearest five-star restaurant, and a good long rest at the nearest five-star hotel, and…

This part made me laugh nervously--that is so what she would do. Now if only she'd come out...

Yup. Any minute now, she'd come barreling out of that jungle, probably with the carcass of some deadly beast that had gotten in her way slung over her shoulder...

Hehehe, of course Kermit's thinking like that...

Any minute now.

Any minute now...

*gulp*

Miss Piggy looked up at the fruits high, high above her head. It was hard to know from here, but they looked like the ones in the book, and the tree seemed to match the description, too.

Piggy is such a wilderness woman. ...Okay, not really. But she's working on it.

She sighed. "Lousy book's always right," she muttered. She carefully straddled the branch, untied her boots, and slid them off with the intention of tying the laces together, to hang around her neck, and keep the boots with her.

Well, Piggy, you're in nature... I think a nature guide book would always be right.

She watched them fall back to the ground beneath her, and sighed. "...I'll get 'em when I get down," she muttered, and she pulled herself up to climb on.

...Why do I have a feeling she won't be getting them when she gets down?

Her hands were getting sweaty in these lousy suede gloves. That wasn't much help. Halfway to the fruit, she sighed, straddled a branch, pulled the gloves off, and tucked them in a pocket. This outfit had lots of pockets, and only two were occupied- one with the gloves now, and another with her passport and money, items far too precious to leave in some old hut on base. She was beginning to be glad she had brought them. It certainly looked like she wasn't going to go home from the scheduled place at the scheduled time.

*stares!* It looks like she's begining to accept the fact she won't be getting back with the group... *gulp*

...It was good enough. She hungrily devoured it, and made short work of a second and third.

What a pig... *is tackled*

First, she was much closer to the ground than she had thought she was. In fact, she was on the bottom branch.

Second, a very big snake had arrived since she had begun to climb, and it now had a loop around one of her boots, and was giving her a look that she was fairly certain roughly translated as, "You're too close. Now you die." Its head was slowly rising, probably preparing to strike...

AHHHH! I knew she wasn't getting those boots! CLIMB, PIGGY, CLIMB!

The snake had struck, and had one of her gloves in its mouth, and was slowly settling back to the ground.

THAT was close.

Climbing down this tree was, painfully plainly, not an option.

I freaking loved this sentence.

She needed to get out of this place.

Well duh.

She very carefully shifted her weight, and very carefully removed her pack, and very carefully settled back against the trunk. She took out the book and opened it to the first page. Then, with her ears perked and her nerves sensitive, she began to read.

*HUGS Piggy*

When they were back at base, however, out of sight and sound from the Muppets, it was their time to release their frustration.

*GLARES at them!* Don't they know who Miss Piggy is?

"De frog does not understand de danger," one of them sighed with a shake of his head. "It's a standing rule. If dey spend one night out dere, dat's de end. We maybe search another day, but only one! Dis will be her third night out dere, if she still out dere. Why we still looking?"

Because it's MISS PIGGY!

"They say she's a tough cookie," said another. "And, the man they work for pays us."

Yeah, she is one tough cookie--she's gonna crumble YOU if you don't knock it off!

"Only to de end of de week," said the first. "Den dey go home. Den dey know. Only two days more."

GAH! ...Why do I feel like this fan-fic is going to last more than two days?

MORE PLEASE! ! !