The RHLC!

[Skye]

You know Ed, I saw you last night, and I'm pretty darn sure I saw you with Cookie, a razor, and a big plastic bag full of black hair. I didn't think twice about it then, but I have a feeling you shaved Cookie's moustache off to protect him after he took the cookies! And our witness's account certainly does help, doesn't it? Ahh, Richard sure does assist us a lot around here!

A-ha! Has the case been cracked? I do believe it... we're gettin' cloooooser!

 

[The Count]

I do believe... Not.
Cookie Monster's Beth's roommate. So any incident involving him should be taken up with her. Besides, I don't use razors. Nasty things, I only use an electric shaver, and that's to shave my own fuzz. And as to my whereabouts, I was asleep when the events took place.

Now then... As to your witness's testimony. That's plainly circumstancial. Frank with a case of laryngitis, and a blue furry creature gobbling everything in sight? Seems to me this is a case of mistaken identity, I submit that Gorgon Heap might've masterminded this entire plot just to frame an innocent Cookie Monster.

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

(rockets down from Richard's cloud and turns off jet pack)

Wow...so Mary likes having a slice of lemon pound cake with a cup of tea, St. Bridget loves a good slice of cheesecake and St. Anthony's fond of chocolate-dipped macaroons...and I'll really have to try this orange shortbread recipe that St. Margaret gave me...

(clears throat) Ed, I'm going to have to ask your client for a fur sample, and I'll have to take a few of your fingerprints to compare to these on the detector switches.

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Now then... As to your witness's testimony. That's plainly circumstancial. Frank with a case of laryngitis, and a blue furry creature gobbling everything in sight? Seems to me this is a case of mistaken identity, I submit that Gorgon Heap might've masterminded this entire plot just to frame an innocent Cookie Monster.

(raises eyebrows) Interesting...how did you know it was a blue creature? Richard only said the monster was huge and furry. He never mentioned what color the creature was...

 

[CensoredAlso]

Oh, good point, color was never mentioned!

Btw, it makes sense about sweets in Heaven. I would think you'd be concentrating more on a healthy soul at that point, since you don't technically have a body. (And you had your chance to eat healthy on Earth didn't you? Hehe)

 

[Skye]

Ooooo! Good catch, Erin!

Hehe, well, I don't know about sweets in Heaven... but I sure know I don't do so well eatin' healthy here on Earth!

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

R: Yeah, and here in heaven, there's no such thing as cavities or unhealthy weight gain. And all those crazy, unpleasant fad diets have been consigned to that other place.
MN: Really? No cavities or unsightly bulges? (remembers current situation) Now, then, still need to get those prints and fiber samples...

 

[CensoredAlso]

Hehe, well, I don't know about sweets in Heaven... but I sure know I don't do so well eatin' healthy here on Earth!

Oh I know, me neither! I feel so bad sometimes, because you are supposed to take care of your body and all. Think of the consequences, respect yourself etc.

Ok, do we get those fiber samples to the Law & Order people?

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

I think the Special Letters Unit has a crime lab not too far down the road from here. I think we can borrow their microscope.

 

[CensoredAlso]

Oh man, I totally forgot about that, lol.

::Law & Order sound effect::

...So are the results in yet? I can't stand the tension!