Somebody's Getting Married?

[Ruahnna]

Chapter 19: Pique of the Day

Chapter 19: Pique of the Day

Piggy’s pique had not survived on the set, but when they returned to her apartment she found it returning. She had rushed home and changed into something far more suited to an evening at home than what she had worn at work all day, but came out of the bedroom to find Kermit talking animatedly on the phone. She smiled, bemused, and went into the kitchette to see what might be possible for dinner.
In the end, Piggy’s imagination ran out and she decided they could order pasta. Kermit was still on the phone, so she looked through the stack of delivery menus until she found one that seemed appropriate. She turned to Kermit, who was now deep in conversation—and tying up her phone. Piggy hesitated. She didn’t want to interrupt, but she wanted to order the food. The day had been long, and she was tired and hungry. Oh! She could use the pay phone in the hall!
She was halfway across the living room area when she realized that she would have to get dressed again to go out into the hall. She waited, but Kermit now had the phone cradled on his shoulder and was making notes on a piece of hotel stationary, alternately nodding and shaking his head.
“No!” Kermit said firmly. “No ducks! I was very specific abou—what?”
Someone on the other end obviously made a point. Kermit shrugged.
“Well, penguins would be okay, but—“
More tinny noise from the phone. Piggy looked at the menu, then at her lingerie. Her hostess gown wasn’t flimsy, but it would never pass for street wear. Still, how likely was it that someone was going to be out in her end of the hall in the space of time it would take her to run down and use the phone? She looked at her husband again. He seemed oblivious to her situation, laughing at something that had been said.
“Yeah, right!” said Kermit. “Well, you tell them I—what? By Wednesday? No—I don’t think—“
He had turned around and spied her, and he smiled that sweet lop-sided smile that always made Piggy feel like melting. His eyes took in her outfit, and the way she fit into it with approval. Piggy was then certain that she could not go out in the hall dressed like this.
Smiling, she held up the menu and tapped it lightly with one satin-gloved hand. Kermit nodded and held up a finger in the universal wait-a-minute gesture. Piggy waited, but not patiently. After another three minutes of waiting, Piggy sailed past him into the kitchen. Kermit watched her majestic exit from the living room with appreciation, but he also got the point. The interminable telephone conversation was terminated, and he joined Piggy in the kitchen, where they perused the menu and ordered supper.
The wait for the food to arrive was spend much like it had been the first evening in Kermit’s apartment—snuggled up in the kitchen and making the most of the first real moment of togetherness they’d had since they arrived on the set early, early that morning. Piggy’s irk dissipated, and she sighed and put her arms around Kermit’s shoulders.
“Kermie,” she asked. “Where do you want to live?”
“No further than six feet away from you,” he murmured, giving her a self-satisfied smooch.
Piggy giggled, but was not deterred. “I’m serious,” she said. “When we go back home, what kind of—“
The phone rang. Piggy answered the kitchen phone with a cheery, “This is Moi,” but after a moment or two she made a face and put her hand down over the mouthpiece. “It’s Gonzo,” she mouthed. “Something about needing ducks for—“
“I’m on it,” Kermit said, retreating back into the living room and snatching up the phone there. “Hey, Gonzo—it’s me, Kermit. No—no, that was me. He already talked to me and I said no. Look, I thought I was very clear that we were not going to—huh? No—no, I don’t think…well, if we didn’t light them, I suppose we could….”
Kermit wandered away, tethered by the phone cord, and Piggy sighed and put her pucker away. So much for an evening at home. She thought about redoing her nails while waiting for the food, but couldn’t get very enthusiastic about it. She wandered into the bedroom and brushed her hair until it shone and fell in little soft wisps around her shoulders. That made her feel better, and she put a surreptitious dab of French perfume in a couple of likely places. The perfume made her think of Paris, which made her think of Kermit, and she went back into the living room again, hoping to find him waiting with open arms. He was still on the phone.
Piggy opened her mouth to object, but someone knocked on the door.
“Italian Delights Delivery,” called a voice. Piggy got her purse and went for the door. Some of her irritation was salved by the awestruck and flabbergasted reaction of the just-post-adolescent delivery boy when she answered the door. He’d obviously had no idea about the recipients of his delivery. He took the money without looking at it, tried to stammer something. Benevolently, Piggy sighed, then reached around to the little end table just inside the door for the convenient stack of autographed pictures she kept handy. She scrawled a feminine script across the bottom, “Love Miss Piggy” and added a defiant “Kissy, kissy, kissy” because Kermit was still on the phone before thrusting it into the young man’s hands. She still had to pry the carryout bag from his numb fingers.
“Ub uhn wha?” the young man babbled. Piggy took his arm and gently steered him back out into the hall, smiling at his befuddlement. When she came back into the room, Kermit was off the phone and smiling at her.
“You still got it,” he teased, and Piggy put the bag of comestibles on the floor and struck a sultry pose.
“Well,” she said. “Why don’t you come over here and show me what to do with it?”
Kermit hastened to obey.
They were happily lip-locked when the phone rang again. Kermit half-turned toward the sound, but Piggy cupped his face in one soft hand with a no-nonsense grip and looked into his bulbous eyes.
“Forget the phone!” Piggy growled, and set her lips on heavy stun.
For a period of several minutes there was little sound in the room but the hollow ringing of the phone, which went unheeded and unanswered.
“What phone?” murmured Kermit after a pleasant interval. It was doubtful he could have given his name if he’d answer the devise.
Piggy was mollified, and snuggled up against him in a very satisfactory way.
“You hungry?” she asked.
Kermit nodded mutely, gazing into her eyes with a dreamy expression on his face. Piggy reached for the bag, but Kermit’s arms tightened around her.
“Maybe we could eat…later,” he suggested. Piggy thought they could.

 

[Ruahnna]

I'm coming down the home stretch guys! One or two more posts and the story of their wedding and its aftermath will be done--at least, my story of their wedding and aftermath will be done. For those of you who have hung in there, with me--bless you! I hope you've enjoyed reading it even half as much as I've enjoyed writing it! Kissy kissy!

 

[The Count]

You know something... Very much liked this one. Maybe it's because of all the detail you put into it. Maybe it's because of the behind-the-scenes scenes. Maybe it's because it deals with TMTM, the more personable of the movies. But there's something here that I've liked especially withthe chapters after the movie and the wedding and all that stuff.

Please, post whatever's left as soon as you can.

 

[Ruahnna]

Chapter 20: He Said, She Said

Chapter 20: He Said, She Said
It had been a lovely, leisurely evening—eventually, but the franticness of the next day more than made up for it. Piggy felt breathless long after they’d arrived on the set, and she’s felt like she was running through a succession of revolving doors as they tried to get everything ready for the final shoot.
Everyone was here today! Practically everyone who had been in the movie was here for the final scenes. Even Edgar and Cecile had come back and brought Beth, which was terrific. And it was wonderful to be the center of so many congratulations and well-wishes and hugs and kisses and, oh, everything, but the attention was making Piggy flustered. It was sometimes a delicate balance to get into character when the character that you played was merely a fictionalized version of yourself. There were many times when Piggy had taken spectacular exception to the way she had been characterized, but she was a consummate professional after all, and she could do it for the director six different ways—before he finally did it her way!
For reasons that Piggy had not been clear about, they had postponed the filming of the first part of “Manhattan Melodies” until this final day. Never mind—she was ready, but when her thoughts strayed back to the filming of the second half of the show within the show, all she could remember was the look on Kermit’s face when he had dropped to one knee and proposed. Dear, sweet, wonderful Kermit! Kermit whom she loved! And who was currently driving her crazy with last-minute adjustments. He had been playing with the script a little, trying to punch up their dialogue in the backstage scene. The original argument had seemed like tame stuff to Piggy, and while Kermit might have countered that she had hit him for less, she would have something to say about holding her tongue as well.
Thinking about holding her tongue made Piggy remember a few other things about dear, sweet, wonderful Kermit that he might have preferred that she did not. She remembered how he had teased her the day of the wedding—the whole stunt with the ring had been showmanship of the highest quality. Surprising her with the arrival of her mother—although that had not quite gone according to plan! Arguing with her about filming the scene again when she had been so…and then he had been so…
Piggy found her emotions roller-coastering out of control, and fled to her dressing room. This last scene was critical, for all of the story lines had resolved in that one backstage scene—all except the ultimate story line, which she was now living. Piggy felt the prick of happy, exasperated tears in her eyes and dabbed frantically at her makeup. How her life had changed in the past two weeks! How amazing that the one thing she thought would make her completely happy HAD! And she was happy. Completely happy. Except when he was driving her crazy. Like he was right now.
She had come to her dressing room to get away from everything, but he had been by twice in the past five minutes, still tweaking the script. Finally, Piggy had said, as sweetly as she was able, that he could say whatever it was he wanted to say out there and she was going to do her scene AS WRITTEN. Kermit had smiled at her vehemence, sneaked under her guard for a quick smooch and run for his life.
Good answer, thought Piggy.
Finally, they were all there—all gathered and ready for the scene. Kermit was looking at her with mischief in his eyes, but she remained composed. Whatever he threw at her today, she planned to throw right back.
“You ready?" he asked. His eyes were suddenly serious. Piggy nodded.
“Ready," she insisted.
The film began to roll.
“You are Kermit the Frog, and you love me," Piggy said earnestly. “You want to marry me. You want to have children with me.” The thought made Piggy blush, but her husband wasn’t blushing.
“With you?" Kermit said, his face a perfect replica of comic disbelief. “In love with a pig? Hmm—wait till I tell the guys in marketing!" He turned to Fozzie and Gonzo, laughing. “Maybe you expect me to go hog wild? Maybe—perhaps you could bring home the bacon!u201D There was a warning light blinking furiously in Kermit’s brain, but he ignored it with supreme smugness and continued his ad-libbed rant. “Ah—the sounds of love—suey! Oink oink!"
“Cancel the show!" Piggy cried,
Kermit braced himself, knowing what was coming, but the force of her swat did more than send him flying across the room. It took the breath right out of his lungs and left him gasping. With a little squeal of concern, Piggy ran to his side.
“Ooh, Kermie—did I, did I hurt you?"
Kermit couldn’t seem to get enough air into his lungs to both breathe and talk. He nodded weakly, but at the little “oh” of distress from Piggy he tried to put a brave face on it.
“I’m fine," he wheezed. “I just—I just got the wind knocked out of me.” He smiled a little shakily. “You pack a wallop, Mrs. The Frog.”
Piggy looked flustered. “But—but the script says—“
Kermit put a hand on her arm, getting his wind and his composure back in spurts.
“It’s okay, Honey. I’m fine. You just—it just surprised me a little. I’ll be ready for it next time.”
“Next time?" Piggy asked, her expression baffled.
“Yeah," Kermit said, still rubbing his middle. “You, um, messed up the shot when you ran in front of the camera.”
Piggy’s mouth dropped open. She looked to Scooter for confirmation. “Really?" she asked, blue eyes wide.
Scooter nodded morosely. “We’ll have to do it again. Places everybody.”
Piggy put a solicitous hand under Kermit’s arm as they walked back toward their marks, but when the cameras began to roll, the look of concern in her eye was replaced with realistic wrath. They ran the scripted lines and then Piggy said “Hi yah!" and sent him hurtling through space. He hit the chair perfectly, but this time Piggy’s curls obscured the outer edge of the shot. The third time, it was her impressive profile from neck to knees that blocked the shot.
In all the years that he had worked with Piggy, he had never known her to upstage anyone without trying. He had a feeling that he had inadvertently made it onto her short list and was paying the price for some real or imagined hurt.
“Um, Honey," said Kermit. “Think we could get this one in the can soon? I don’t think I can stand a whole lot more of this.”
Piggy fidgeted, giving a fair imitation of distress, but there was something not quite right about the set of her jaw…oh! OH! Thunderstruck, Kermit saw Piggy’s quick dart of assessment—the same look she would give him to see if he’d been pleased with a scene. He felt his face scrunch up in annoyance.
“A moment please, Scooter," Kermit said, then took Piggy firmly by the arm and led her away from the crowd.
“Piggy," Kermit muttered, when they were out of earshot. “I know what you’re doing. Stop it.”
Piggy gave him a level look that he could read only too well, then her blue eyes grew wide and she batted her eyelashes at him. Sheesh! And the Oscar goes to-- “Why, Kermie—I don’t know what you could be referring to.”
“Piggy, stop it!" He rubbed his middle carefully. “That last one really hurt.”
“Good," Piggy muttered, but just low enough that he couldn’t call her on it.
“Look—what’s this about?" He thought he knew, but didn’t want to suggest anything she hadn’t thought of yet. “Come on," he said, trying to keep his voice teasing. “What did I ever do to you?"
Piggy’s back straightened just a little and those beautiful blue eyes narrowed.
“Why don’t we start with what you’ve done to me lately!" “But—but Piggy—“
But Piggy was not about to be deterred from her course. In fact, she was just getting started. “Let’s see—you tricked me into tricking you into a marriage that everyone but Moi knew about!"
“Oh, that," Kermit said uneasily. “Well, yes, but it was—“
“Yes—that! You—you played with my feelings! You knew how much I cared, but you teased me with the thought that you didn’t really love me, too.”
“Oh, Piggy—you know I always—“
“Do you have any idea how it felt—knowing that I might lose you forever?"
Kermit was shocked to see actual tears in her eyes, and turned his body hastily to protect her from any curious onlookers.
“Sweetheart," he said gently. “Honey, look, I didn’t—“
“And then you—you said you did love me and you did want me to marry you, and it was…it was…wonderful!" she said accusingly. Her tone made it clear she thought him a terrible amphibian.
So much for understanding women, Kermit thought.

“What’s going on?"
“Fight.”
“Already?"
“Sure," said Scooter, grinning. “You didn’t think paradise was going to last forever.”
“Oh no!" moaned Fozzie. “And Kermit seemed so happy.”
Scooter hastened to reassure the distraught comedian. “It’s okay," he said. “This is a kiss-and-make-up fight.”
Rowlf looked at him with new respect. “How can you tell?"
Scooter elaborated. “Well, if she was really mad, Kermit wouldn’t be able to put his arms around her.”
“But he isn’t," Fozzie objected.
At just that moment, Kermit reached to embrace her.
“Ha," said Scooter. “Told ya.”

Kermit had no idea what to do next, but he was pretty certain putting his arms around her would be okay. “Um, I think it’s wonderful, too," he ventured, trying to embrace her, but his efforts were in vain. As if aware of her vulnerability when he was holding her, Piggy wrenched away.

Fozzie and Rowlf looked at Scooter triumphantly. “Ha yourelf," said Rowlf. “Yeah," said Fozzie. “What he said.”
Scooter was unruffled. He shrugged. “Second time’s the charm," he said.
“Bet you," offered Rowlf. Scooter held his hand up and shook Rowlf’s paw without looking. Fozzie hesitated, then said, “I’m in too.” He added his own furry paw to the mix.

“Of course you think everything’s wonderful!" Piggy snapped. “All you had to do was say ‘I do’ and now the pig does everything you say!"
“What?"
“Now Kermit looks mad," said Fozzie.
“As a hatter," said Floyd Pepper, joining the little throng of spectators. “I mean, he married her highness.”
“I don’t think he’s crazy," said Scooter loyally. “I think they’re just—“
“What’s going on?" said Gonzo. “Where’d Kermit go?"
“Lover’s quarrel," said Rowlf.
“Oh," said Gonzo, turning to watch. “Anybody taping it?"
“Gonzo!"
“What? Geez—make an artistic suggestion and everybody’s a critic.”
“Pipe down," said Floyd, “I can’t hear what they’re saying.”
“I can read lips," said Rizzo. “Somebody give me a boost up—“
“Um, guys," said Scooter uncomfortably. “I don’t really think we should be—“

On the far side of the stage, the argument raged unabated.
“You heard me!" Piggy was saying. “Now that we’re married you think you can just snap your fingers and everything will be—“
“Piggy, that’s ridiculous. Now you sound like Gonzo!"
“And what is that supposed to mean?" Piggy cried angrily.
“It means I didn’t—“
“And then you bragged to everyone about how you have me wrapped around your little webbed finger—“
“But, Piggy, I didn’t mean, um, that you—oh, sheesh.“
With a sudden, ringing clarity, Kermit knew. He knew what he had done, and wondered what the piper would demand.
“What’s the matter?" Piggy flung. “I thought you had everything under control.”
Yep. The light went on in Kermit’s head at the same moment as the warning bell. He swallowed and cleared his throat.
“So you, um, you heard that, did you?.”
“Yes," Piggy admitted, and her eyes mirrored her hurt.
Kermit felt like a louse. It was not usually in his nature to tell tales out of school, and he felt his cheeks grow warm.
“Look, Piggy, that was—“
“And I wasn’t eavesdropping, either!" she said, still bristling.
“No, no—of course not," Kermit said. He stepped forward and tried to put his arms around her again. She let him, but just barely.

There was a murmur on the far side of the soundstage. Everybody seemed to be watching.
“Ah ha!" said Scooter. “Pay up.”
Several people ponied up the dough.

Kermit held Piggy and remembered the way she had clung to him in the taxi the other night, the way she had greeted him every evening with a kiss. This was nothing like that, and it was all his fault.
“Look—I’m, I’m sorry. That was—what I said was uncalled for. I just—I just can’t believe everything that’s happened these past two weeks. It’s been such a roller coaster, such a high. I guess—I guess I got a little cocky.”
“Well, it hasn’t exactly been a picnic for me," Piggy pouted. “Everybody’s watching me now, wondering if I’m going to be different.” She shot him an injured look. “Now that we’re married, they’re always watching me. Everybody wants to see if I’ll do what you say on the set.”
Kermit knew he was already on thin ice, but he couldn’t help himself. He let out a short bark of laughter, making Piggy look at him indignantly. She tried to wrest herself away from his embrace, but Kermit hung on grimly. The strength in those arms holding onto her surprised her. The thought that he didn’t want to let her go made her expression soften. He had never held on before, but this time he did. Maybe this time wasn’t like all those other times.
“Piggy, Honey," Kermit said, smiling at her. “Why should here be any different from home?"
Piggy swallowed her sharp retort. In spite of herself, her lips began to quirk up into a smile. Kermit felt her relax in his embrace, and her arms slipped around his neck as she gazed into his eyes.
“But—“
“Look—I was your director long before I became your husband. Just because we got hitched doesn’t mean I expect you to roll over and do everything I say.”
“But you told Rowlf—“
“Yes, I know I did. And I was out of line. I’m sorry.”
“Really?"
Those blue eyes were huge. Geez, he wanted to kiss her.
“Yeah, really. Piggy, you should know by now that I respect you as an actress, and I expect you to do what you’ve always done—follow your best instincts. If I don’t like it, as the director, I’ll say so. And if you don’t like it, as an actress, you say so, too. Got it?"
Piggy nodded, then looked sheepish. “Did I—did I really hurt you?"
Kermit nodded, rubbing his tender middle. “Yeah, actually.”
For just a moment, Piggy’s eyes were fierce. “Good!" she growled, but she leaned forward and kissed him on the jaw, letting her soft lips linger on his skin. Kermit knew it was only a small down payment on a more convincing request for amnesty later, and he let her slide.
Piggy disengaged from his arms. “We should go," she said gently, starting back for the soundstage. “Everyone is waiting for us.”
“Let ‘em wait," Kermit said. He caught Piggy’s arm, pulled her suddenly into his arms and kissed her while he dipped her down to the floor. Behind them came a loud cacophony of whoops and catcalls, but Kermit ignored all of them. When he set Piggy back on her shiny high heels, she was gasping for breath.
“Is that a satisfactory expression of my sincere apology?"
Piggy’s face was flushed. “Um, yes," she mumbled, heart still racing.
“Think we can do this scene without sending me to the clinic?" Kermit asked pointedly.
Piggy took an unsteady breath, then nodded and smiled. “Yes, dear," she said silkily. “Whatever you say.”

When they returned to the set, Scooter was pocketing a handful of five-dollar bills. Kermit sighed, pretty certain he could guess the source of Scooter’s revenue.

 

[The Count]

Oh... You were talking about the scene where Kermit had amnesia and was among the throng of friends before staging the final version of Manhattan Melodies. Thought you were refering to the opening segment where Kermit's whistling the tune of "Together Again strolling down the halls of the college building en route to the theater.

Rully liked the gang getting together to hear the conversation between the wedded couple, typical Muppet betting going on. Even moreso cause Scooter pocketed some extra cash for himself.

Please Cath, post more soon.

 

[Ruahnna]

Chapter 21: Amnesty

Kermit had been correct in his assumption that Piggy would make amends for her earlier hostility, and the evening found them comfortably wedged together on Kermit’s creaky couch. Piggy had solved the discomfort factor by piling every available cushion in the apartment onto the spartan upholstery. It wasn’t perfect, but it would do, and Piggy lay back into the corner of the couch with Kermit reclining into her welcoming embrace. She leaned forward once every so often and pressed a kiss against the back of his neck, eager to offer comfort. Feeling due a little tenderness—and very sore around the middle—Kermit accepted these offerings of affection as his just due. They had ordered Indian food, and Kermit had eaten the spicy morsels off her fingers with great relish as she’d played hostess. Kermit caught one of her bare hands and kissed the palm, thinking the satin of her gloves could never compare to the satin of her own soft skin.
“Piggy?” he said softly.
“Um hum?” she answered, swirling a finger over his smooth scalp.
“You okay with what happened today?” He had been adamant that he had gotten his just desserts, and refused to entertain even the idea of an apology. Which was just as well.
Kermit felt her hesitate. At first he thought she might not have understood the question and was on the verge of repeating it when she made a small sound and let out a breath she’d obviously been holding.
“Piggy?”
“I—“
Kermit turned over, wanting to see her expression so he could correctly gauge her response, and alter his own in kind. “Tell me,” he said gently.
Piggy smiled, but more out of nervousness than pleasure. “This—this is hard,” she said finally. Kermit waited for her to elaborate, but when she did not, he spoke again.
“Since when has anything ever been easy with us?” he teased. His voice was light, but his bulbous eyes were dark with emotion.
“That’s just it!” Piggy burst out. “Everything’s so—so complicated now!”
“No,” Kermit insisted. “Everything’s easier now.”
That caught Piggy up short, and she reached out to touch his face, biting her lip a little in consternation or to keep her from bursting out with something else. “Oh, Kermie….”
“I mean, sure, this is going to take some getting used to, because now what happens there spills over into here.”
Piggy nodded solemnly.
“And what happens here sometimes spills over into there,” Kermit finished. His eyes grew mischievous. “Too bad we filmed the kiss-and-make-up scene already.” Piggy gave him a look and thought of reminding him that they had not, in fact, kissed when they made up on screen, but she stifled the urge when he subsided, slipping his arms around her. “But some things will never change,” he continued earnestly. “You and me—that’s going to go on forever.”
“Yes, Kermie…” said Piggy. “But, sweetie, I—“
“And I don’t want Piggy the actress to change, either. You have an opinion, I expect you to express it. Got it?”
“Yes, Kermie.”
“And stop saying ‘Yes Kermie’ to me. I—I feel like I’m in Invasion of the Body Snatchers, you know? Or the Stepford Pigs. Just let your yes be yes and your no be no and we’ll fight about all the stuff in between, okay?”
Piggy just looked at him, literally unable to respond. It was impossible to agree with him—he had just forbidden it. And impossible to argue with him—for he was right. And she did not want to argue with him—not any more. Having lost the option of speech, Piggy did the next best thing. She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his, saying everything that truly mattered all at once.
“Good,” said Kermit when he had recovered his voice. “Then we’re square.”
“Actually,” said Piggy dryly, “we’re horizontal.” Kermit gave her a look and she started to giggle.
“C’mere, you,” he said in fair imitation of Piggy’s sultry growl. And, surprising them both not at all, Piggy did just what he said.
This time.

 

[The Count]

So um... Is that the ending you were promising? Or is there something left to tell to this tale? If so, please post it when you get the chance, as we love all your fanfic writings.

 

[Leyla]

Ahhhhhhh. Ru Ru Ru Roooey Ru. I love it, I love the whole story, and it deserves a longer better review than I am currently capable of (I very nearly wrote "Kermitly" capable of, so that should tell you something). Anyway! LOOOVE it, it's brilliant, and I'll tell you just WHY I think so tomorrow.

 

[The Count]

OK... Since I didn't find a "The End" or a statement saying as much by the author of this fine fictional account... Is there more to come? If so, please post!

 

[Ruahnna]

Actually, I'm done with this one, but this story continues shortly with "Getting Swamped." Left to my own devises, I don't see the story every entirely being over!

Thanks for reading, all you who have (and perhaps will in the future). I enjoyed, um, setting the record straight on what really happened at the wedding! (hahaha)

So, I'll see you NEXT time on "GETTING SWAMPED!"