Sesame Street: A Musical Play in Two Acts

[redBoobergurl]

Awww, poor Grover, I want to give him a big hug. Loving this, please keep it coming!

 

[Super Scooter]

Scene Eight​

Location: Sesame Street, Park

Time: Sunday Evening

At Rise: A poorly built stage with a brightly colored curtain has been made in the middle of the park. Prairie Dawn is sitting at a toy piano on stage.

Prairie: *ahem*

(sung)

Oh, welcome, dear viewer, to our little play.
We hope you enjoy what we show you today.

(whisper) Raise the curtain, Snuffy!

Prairie gets up from her piano. The piano is pulled off stage as the curtain goes up. A mountain background has been painted. Cookie Monster peeks his head out from back stage.

Cookie: Uh, we now present da Ballad of Casey MacPhee... dat me.

Prairie: Get back, Cookie!

Cookie: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry.

Cookie goes back. The band plays an up-beat country tune.

Cookie Monster comes out on stage again in an engineer's hat and with a cardboard cut-out of a train.

Prairie:

(sung)

Oh, listen while I tell ya
A story old and true.
How Casey MacPhee
The engineer
Got his train through.
He faced the toughest duty
An engineer could do,
But he was brave and unafraid
And he got his train through.

Herry Monster and Telly enter quickly.

Prairie, Telly, Herry:

Through, through, through.
He got the train through.
Through, through, through.

Cookie:

Me get the train through.

Prairie:

The train was carryin' moo cows
And milk and ice cream, too.
There was six cars filled with cookies
And a tank of chocolate goo.
The stuff was for the parties
That the kids would have all year.
And gettin' that train through the narrow pass
Was the job of the engineer.

Prairie, Herry, Telly:

Through, through, through.
He'll get that train through.

Cookie:

Through, through, through.
Me get that train through.

Prairie: (whisper) Now, Snuffy!

Snuffy: Oh, right.

A pile of white feathers falls in front of Cookie Monster.

Prairie:

(sung)

But an avalanche had closed the track
And covered it with snow.
The snow was deep;
The track was blocked.
There was nowhere he could go.
Casey knew the train was filled
With things he loved to eat.

Herry:

But Casey knew his duty
And would not admit defeat.

Prairie, Telly, Herry:

Through, through, through.
He'll get that train through.

Cookie:

Through, through, through.
Me get the train through.

(spoken) Look at all these cookies! Wait... there no cookies!

Prairie: (whisper) Just pretend, Cookie!

Cookie: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. There are lots of cookies on my train. Yes. But, me no eat them. No they for the children... Oh, what to do! Me no eat the cookies.

Prairie: (whisper) This is your part, Herry.

Herry: Oh, right!

(sung)

Yes, Casey was a hero.
And his duty he could see.
Without the cookies and the milk,
No parties could there be.
The kids would be unhappy,
So Casey raised his head.

Cookie:

Me forget about the cookies,
And eat the snow instead!

Prairie, Telly, Herry:

Through, through, through!
He got that train through!
He ate up all the avalanche!

Cookie:

It mighty tasty, too!

Prairie, Telly, Herry:

Through, through through!
He got that train through!
Casey, our great engineer,
Got the train through!

Hooray!

Cookie: This snow taste funny.

 

[The Count]

Yeah... You sure that's white snow and not funny-smelling yellow snow instead? If it's yellow snow, leave it alone Cookie.
*Offers real cookies.

 

[Barry Lee]

I love this. ALL.
I wanna see this live pleaaase

 

[Super Scooter]

Scene Nine​

Location: Sesame Street

Time: A few days later.

At Rise: Prairie Dawn stands at the center of the stage. Ernie is at stage right, and Grover is at stage left. The stage is still dark, though. A spot light comes down on Kermit the Frog as he enters.

Kermit: The success of Prairie Dawn's pageant has died down around here, and poor Prairie is just as down as ever. There is another pageant coming up in just a few weeks, and it seems she doesn't know what to do with it. Poor ol' Grover still hasn't heard from his friend, Amy, and Ernie? Well, Ernie's still looking for a game to play with Bert. One they haven't played before. Let's see how they're doing with their problems...

Kermit exits. A spotlight shines on Prairie Dawn.

Prairie: Oh, dear. I'm afraid I'll never come up with the right song for my next pageant. I want to do something just wonderful. Something beautiful and even inspiring! I want my next pageant to end with something just so meaningful, but I don't even know where to start. Oh, what song should I use? What song would be perfect to end my show?

The spotlight moves to Grover.

Grover: Oh. Hello, there. You know, I still have not heard from my friend, Amy. It has been over a week now. Maria told me that... that nothing has come for me. She said she would send me another postcard. I wish I knew if she were okay. But, you know something? I'm trying not to be too sad about it. Do you know what I like to do when I am sad? Sometimes I like to sing a little song. ... What's that? What song should I sing? ... Hmmm.

The spotlight moves to Ernie.

Ernie: Gee, I've played all the games here on Sesame Street before. I can't seem to find any new and fun games to play with my ol' buddy, Bert. You know, I don't think I've sung all the songs on Sesame Street yet. Maybe I could sing a song, and make it a game! Or maybe a song that is a game! That could be fun. But what song? Hmm. You know, there was one song I was thinking of. How did it go again? Hmmm.

(sung)

La-de-da-de-dum.

Another spotlight shines on Grover.

Grover:

La-de-da-de-dum.

Another spotlight shines on Prairie Dawn.

Prairie Dawn:

What's the name of that song?

Ernie:

La-de-da-de-dum.

Grover:

La-de-da-de-dum.

All three:

What's the name of that song?

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
What's the name of that song?

Ernie:

It goes la-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
Something something birds.

Grover:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de,
I wish I remembered the words.

Prairie:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
What's the name of that song?

Bob, Gordon, Susan and Maria enter.

Prairie, Grover, Ernie:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de.

Bob:

I'd like to sing right along.
I've heard it said
With words and music
A fella can't go wrong.
So...

All:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
What's the name of that song?

Gordon and Susan:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
What's the name of that song?
La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de.

Prairie, Grover, Ernie:

We need the name of that song!

Maria:

It goes la-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
Something something nice.

All:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de,
I think it repeats itself twice.

Big Bird and Snuffy enter.

All:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
What's the name of that song?
La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de.

Big Bird and Snuffy:

We know the name of that song!

Big Bird:

It's called...

Snuffy:

No, that's not it, it's called...

Big Bird:

Wait! I've got it! ... Oh, no.

Big Bird and Snuffy:

That must be wrong.
So...

All:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
What's the name of that song?

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
What's the name of that song?
La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de.

Oscar pops out of his trash can.

Oscar:

They keep on singing that song!

Gordon:

It goes la-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de, then...

All:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de,
We start it all over again!

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum.

Bob:

Something shining above!

All:

La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum.

Susan:

La-de-da-de-da, love!

All:

We can't help singing
La-de-da-de-dum
Loud and clear and strong!
But, la-de-da-de-dum.
La-de-da-de-dum,
La-de-da-de-dum-dum!
What's the name of that song?

Intermission​

 

[Super Scooter]

Yeah... You sure that's white snow and not funny-smelling yellow snow instead? If it's yellow snow, leave it alone Cookie.
*Offers real cookies.

Well, the snow tastes funny cuz it's feathers, but... Me thank you for real cookies.

 

[Super Scooter]

Act Two
Scene One​

Location: An alleyway

Time: Night, a few days later

At Rise: Hoots the Owl is playing a jazz number on his saxaphone. There are a few other cool birds around him and a cat, all playing different instruments.

Kermit enters.

Kermit: Hi-ho, everyone, and welcome back. This is act two of our little show, and we hope you like it as much as the first one. Before the intermission, you may recall that Ernie was having some trouble coming up with a good game to play. He decided he was going to try and find a song he might be able to make a game out of. Well, it seems Ernie's not having an easy time with that one either, so he decided to ask for some help...

Kermit exits. Ernie enters with a saxaphone and his Rubber Duckie.

Ernie:

(sung)

Excuse me, Mr. Hoots,
I hate to bug a busy bird
But I want to learn the sax
And I need a helpful word.
I always get a silly squeak
When I play the blues.

Ernie tries to play a few notes, but he can't without squeaking his Rubber Duckie.

Hoots:

Ernie, keep your cool,
I'll teach ya how to blow the sax.
I think I dig your problem,
It's rubber, and it quacks.
You'll never find the skill you seek
Till you pay your dues.

You gotta put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put down the duckie.

Hoots:

Put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put down the duckie.

Hoots:

Put down the duckie,
Yeah, you gotta leave the duck alone.
You gotta put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put down the duckie.

Hoots:

Put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put it down!

Hoots:

Put down the duckie
If you wanna play the saxophone!

Ernie tries again, but it's no use.

Hoots:

You didn't hear a word I said!
You gotta get it through your head.
Don't be a stubborn cluck.
Ernie, lay aside the duck!
I've learned a thing or two
From years of playing in a band.
It's hard to play a saxophone
With something in your hand.
To be a fine musician
You're gonna have to face the facts.

Though you're blessed with flying fingers,
When you wanna wail, you're stuck.
What good are flying fingers
If they're wrapped around a duck?
Change the toy's position
If you wanna ace the sax!

You gotta put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put down the duckie.

Hoots:

Put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put down the duckie.

Hoots:

Put down the duckie,
Yeah, you gotta leave the duck alone.
You gotta put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put down the duckie.

Hoots:

Put down the duckie
If you wanna play the saxophone!

Don't have to put it on a train.
Don't have to wash it down the drain.
Don't have to lock it in a drawer.
Don't have to shove it out the door.
Don't have to stuff it in your pocket.
Or send it flyin' in a rocket!
Don't have to get it out of town!
Ernie, put the quacker down!

You gotta put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put down the duckie.

Hoots:

Put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put down the duckie.

Hoots:

Put down the duckie,
Yeah, you gotta leave the duck alone.
You gotta put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put down the duckie.

Hoots:

Put down the duckie
If you wanna play the saxophone!

You gotta put down the duckie.

Birds and cat:

Put down the duckie!

Hoots:

Put down the duckie,
Yeah, you gotta leave the duck alone.
You gotta put down the duckie.

Birds and Cat:

Put it down!

Hoots:

Put down the duckie
If you wanna play the saxophone!

Ernie: (spoken) I just don't think I can do it.

All but Ernie:

(sung)

Oooooooh, yeah!

 

[Super Scooter]

Scene Two​

Location: 123 Sesame Street

Time: The next morning

At Rise: Gordon, Bob, Maria, Susan and Luis all stand around talking. Oscar is listening in from his trash can.

Bob: I think Prairie Dawn did a great job pulling that pageant together.

Susan: Yeah, I wonder what she's planning for next time.

Oscar: Hey. What are you all talking about?

Gordon: Prairie Dawn's pageant.

Oscar: Oh? That crummy thing? He he.

Maria: Oh, Oscar!

Oscar: (sleazily) Yes, Maria?

Bob: Oscar, you just don't appreciate anything!

Oscar: Well, that's not true.

All but Oscar: No?

Oscar: No! I appreciate a lot of nice things. 'Cause they all end up as trash!

All but Oscar: Oh, Oscar!

Gordon: You just hate everything, don't you?

Oscar: Yeah, especially this conversation. So, go away, and leave me alone! Scram!

Oscar ducks back down into his can, slamming the lid shut behind him.

They exit, disgusted with Oscar.

Oscar pops his head out again.

Oscar: The nerve of them. Suggesting I hate everything. Just because I don't like what they like. I'll tell you one thing I love. I love bein' alone!

(sung)

And I love trash!
Anything dirty or dingy or dusty,
Anything ragged or rotten or rusty!
Yes, I love trash!

(spoken) Now, get a load of this rotten stuff!

(sung; holding up an old shoe)

I have here a sneaker
That's tattered and worn.
It's all full of holes
And the laces are torn.
A gift from my mother
The day I was born!
I love it because it's trash!

Oh, I love trash!
Anything dirty or dingy or dusty,
Anything ragged or rotten or rusty!
Yes, I love trash!

(spoken) Here's something you'll really love.

(sung; holding up a dead fish wrapped in newspaper)

I have here some newspaper
Thirteen months old.
I've wrapped fish inside it,
It's smelly and old.
But, I wouldn't trade
It for a big pot of gold!
I love it because it's trash!

Yes, I love trash!
Anything dirty or dingy or dusty,
Anything ragged or rotten or rusty!
Yes, I love trash!

(spoken) Look at the rest of this junk.

(sung; displaying items as he sings their praises)

I've a clock that won't work
And an old telephone,
A broken umbrella,
A rusty trombone.
And I am delighted
To call it my own!
I love them because they're trash!

Oh, I love trash!
Anything dirty or dingy or dusty,
Anything ragged or rotten or rusty!
Yes, I love, I love, I love trash!

(spoken) And that is all, so scram!

Oscar ducks back down into his can.

 

[Super Scooter]

I love this. ALL.
I wanna see this live pleaaase

I'm workin' on that one.

By the way, thank you all for your comments.

(oh, and, by the way, for anyone else that notices, there are technically about three acts to this play, but... whoever heard of a musical in three acts?)

 

[Super Scooter]

Scene Three​

Location: Ernie and Bert's Living Room

Time: Late Afternoon

At Rise: Bert sits alone, reading a book.

Bert: (laughs) Oh, boy, now that's funny! (calls out) Ernie, you gotta hear this! There's this pigeon who... Ernie? Is he still out? He's hardly been around at all in over a week! Oh, well. It's been nice to have some peace and quiet so I can read. But... you know, I... I do miss him sometimes. I guess you just kinda get used to him being around. All those silly games he played! Ha ha! ... I never thought I'd say it, but, I miss those. Oh, Ernie, where could you be? What are you doing all the time?

The Oinker sisters enter, and a blues song starts to play.

Bert:

(sung)

I got this pain that
I just can't deal with.
How I wish I had somebody
To go and eat oatmeal with.
Oh gee, I really need a friend to play with me.

Oinker Sisters:

Play with me!

Bert:

I'd give him friendship and affection.
I'd even let him come and see my paper clip collection.
Oh gee, I sure could use a friend to play with me.

Oinker Sisters:

Play with me!

Bert:

In line he'd gladly stand
To hear a marching band,
Or buy some saddle shoes.
He'd worship argyle socks...

Oinker Sisters: (simultaneously)

Argyle socks!

Bert:

Collect them by the box...

Oinker Sisters: (simultaneously)

By the box!

Bert:

He'd help me chase these blues.
My style would please him
More than a smidgeon.
He'd say, "It's really nifty, Bert
The way you dance the pigeon!"

Oh gee, I gotta find a friend to play with me.

Oinker Sisters:

Play with me.

Bert:

Won't somebody hear my plea?
Wanna end this misery.
I wish I had a friend to...

All:

Play with me.

Bert: (spoken) *sigh* I miss Ernie.