Sesame, DC: The Gotham Grouchfest

The Count

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*Stunned silence. Greatness in this chapter I sense. Parallels between the final fight here an the one in Spider-Mn/Muppets 2 abound... Even the grouchiest of grouches can show his noble side and fight for what's truly right. Bit of cleaning up to do with some wors and pronouns... But it's all most hexcellet as I would usually say. Only the epilogue lft? Well, I await it most pleasedly.
 

muppetwriter

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It's interesting you found parallels between the final fight in this story and the one in Spidey/Muppets 2, Count.:smile: I'm curious to know how it parallels between here and there?
 

The Count

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OK... Will expound on that later. Been stuck here dealing with posts all afternoon, talk to you later after some Toonami updates.
 

muppetwriter

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Alright. But I hope you have the time to real this marvelous epilogue in between those posts.:smile: Pay in mind that this ending isn't narrated by anyone in particular. It's from a third person perspective.


Epilogue​

Following the previous night’s incident, everyone in the city had been cured of the toxin, thanks to the Batman, who had become a public hero. Unfortunately, neither the Xiaolin monks, Count von Count, or Oscar the Grouch were acknowledged for their assist in the situation, but it did not matter to any of us (Oscar did fret about it for a while), because they knew they were heroes in their own eyes. Meanwhile, Elmo and the Mystery Inc. gang had returned to Metropolis to share their adventures with everyone on Sesame Street, but as soon as they arrived there, they had come across what could have been their next biggest mystery: the disappearance of Superman.

Back in Gotham City, upon arriving at the spot where his manor used to stand, Bruce Wayne had received a phone call from Mr. Earle, just as he had found out the news about Lucius Fox replacing him as CEO of Wayne Enterprises, and he asked him what made him think he could decide who ran the company. Bruce answered by telling him that the son of Thomas Wayne himself was the new owner. Mr. Earle contradicted by saying how the company went public a week ago, but Bruce contradicted him by mentioning how he had bought most of the shares through charitable foundations, trusts, and so forth.

“Look, it’s all a bit technical, but the important thing is that my company’s future is secure.” Bruce said, and he could’ve sworn that he heard Earle slightly wheezing over the phone in surprise. “Right, Mr. Fox?”

Right you are, Mr. Wayne.” Lucius replied, just before Bruce turned to the young girl that was sitting next to him at the back of the Rolls Royce and offered her to speak into the phone. The girl was Kimiko, who had a big smile on her face as she addressed Fox and Earle.

“Congratulations, Mr. Fox.” She said. “I want to be the first to tell ya that I have a lot of faith in Bruce’s company, with you in the driver’s seat.”

Thank you, sweetheart.” Fox said.

“Oh, and Mr. Earle?” Kimiko then spoke in the most sarcastic voice she could muster. “Have a nice day.” Bruce just smiled brightly, as he switched off the phone and shared a high-five with Kimiko.

Moments later, when Kimiko and Bruce had made it to the smoking ruins of Wayne Manor, they helped Detective Sean Thomas, Count, Oscar, and the other Xiaolin monks in hammering some boards across the disused well in the backyard area, something that Bruce himself had requested. While workers were shifting through the smoking ruins nearby and being supervised by Alfred, Rachel Dawes arrived at the scene and approached Bruce and his friends.

“Miss Dawes, how are you?” Sean asked her, and she smiled at him, slightly touching the bandaged area where he got cut the other night.

“I should be asking you the same question.” Rachel said, and Sean just chuckled at her, as he looked to Count, Oscar, and the Xiaolin monks.

“I’m just glad that I have all my friends here with, after everything we had been through last night.” Sean stated, while approaching Oscar the Grouch and placing a gentle hand on his shoulder, which Oscar had immediately removed.

“Hey, just because I decided to help save the city, after realizin’ that last night’s episode was too grouchy for my taste, it doesn’t mean you and I are buddy-buddy, Tommy! I still hate yer guts!” Oscar told Sean. “And I will always hate yer guts, whether we’re in Gotham or Metropolis!”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Sean uttered, right before he slammed the lid of Oscar’s new trashcan (which he was quick to slop up, once he got it) closed, silencing Oscar, while Rachel Dawes focused her gaze on Bruce Wayne, remembering what he said the other night that helped her realize that he was Batman.

“Rachel, I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you.”

“No, Bruce…I’m sorry.” Rachel said to him, softly. “The day Chill was murdered…I said some terrible things.”

True things.” Bruce remarked. “I was a coward with a gun, and you made me see that justice is about more than my own anger and pain, so…thank you.”

“I never stopped thinking about you…about us.” As she spoke, she began to get closer to him, while Sean, Count, Oscar, and the mini-monks had watched on. “And when I heard you were back, I…I started to hope.” The others watched on intently, knowing what was about to come next.

“Oh, brother.” Oscar said while peeking through the lid that Sean had leaned on to obscure his view of Rachel and Bruce kissing passionately and desperately.

“I still cannot understand the purpose of boys and girls trading saliva with one another.” Omi uttered, and his Xiaolin companions sort of cringed at the way he interpreted the kiss between Rachel and Bruce. “Is it a way of purifying the spit?”

“Omi…stop talking.” Kimiko requested, as Rachel and Bruce broke their kiss, leaving Bruce to just stare into Rachel’s eyes and looking very hopeful. But Rachel began to shake her head, as if realizing something.

“But then I found out about your mask.” She said.

“Batman’s just a symbol, Rachel.” Bruce remarked, and Rachel shook her head again, gently touching Bruce’s face.

“No, this…this is your mask. Your real face is the one that criminals now fear. The man I loved…the man who vanished…he never came back at all.” Bruce was a little confused by her words, yet he somehow understood them. “But maybe he’s still out there somewhere. Maybe someday, when Gotham no longer needs Batman, I’ll see him again.” Sean, Count, Oscar, and the mini-monks knew what Rachel was telling Bruce—she could not reconcile her love for him with his dual life as Batman. Bruce nodded in agreement to Rachel’s sentiment, and he led her and his friends over to the smoldering remains that Alfred was looking over. “You proved me wrong, you know.”

“About what?” Bruce asked her.

“Your father would be proud of you…just like me.” She replied, and Bruce smiled at her, while she smiled back at him. They shared one last look with one another, before she walked off and Bruce stared after her.

“So what will you do?” Sean asked him, referring to the manor’s remains.

“Rebuild it. Just the way it was.” Bruce told him, with a smile. “Brick for brick.” Sean had nodded with a smile, as Alfred approached them, following Bruce’s gaze on Rachel.

“Just the way it was, sir?” He asked, and Bruce turned to him.

“Yeah, why?”

“I thought we might take the opportunity of making some improvements to the foundation.” Bruce and his friends realized what Alfred what talking about, and they all grinned at him.

“In the southeast corner?”

Precisely, sir.”

~~~~~~~~~~~​

That night, something no one in Gotham had seen before, at least since the situation at the docks involving Carmine Falcone, was cast up onto turbulent clouds. It was the irregular shadow of a bat symbol that impressed Detective Thomas, who met Detective Gordon on the rooftop of the police station, as he sipped coffee from a Styrofoam cup.

“Very nice.” Sean said, analyzing the upturned spotlight with a metal stencil bolted to it.

“Thanks. I couldn’t find any mob bosses to strap to it.” Gordon remarked, and Sean chuckled, as Gordon crushed his cup and threw it to the ground. “I only wish he were here to see it.” Sean knew that he was referring to Batman, and a grin crept across his face, as they heard a fluttering noise that was followed by a tapping sound. The two detectives turned to see Batman, Count, Oscar, and the Xiaolin monks, standing on the other side of the spotlight.

“We can see it from miles away.” Batman said, as Omi and Count came up to the spotlight and smiled at it.

“Now everyone will know who’s coming, once they see one giant bat shining into the clouds.” Count commented.

“It is a most interesting idea, Sergeant Gordon.” Omi said.

“Oh, it’s lieutenant now, kid.” Gordon said, while killing the searchlight and leaving them all to stand there in the dark on the rooftop.

“Commissioner Loeb promoted you, eh?” Sean asked, grinning.

“He sure did.” Gordon replied. “You all really started something. Bent cops running scared. Hope on the streets. But the Narrows is lost.”

“And we still haven’t picked up Crane or half the inmates of Arkham that he freed.” Kimiko added.

“Not to mention the fact that snake in the glass, Jack Spicer, is still out there with Wuya.” Clay mentioned.

“He’s probably coming up with a new strategy to kick our butts harder next time.” Raimundo assumed, and Oscar just snickered over that thought.

“That loser couldn’t come up with any strategy, even if his life depended on one.” Oscar said, and then he confidently added, “And if he does try to fight back, we’ll be ready for him and those other goons…won’t we?” They all looked over at Oscar and then at each other, nodding.

“We will.” Batman said. “We can bring Gotham back.”

“What about escalation?” Gordon asked. “We start carrying semiautomatics, they buy automatics. We start wearing Kevlar, they buy armor-piercing rounds.”

“And your point is?” Oscar asked, and Gordon leaned in closer to Batman, pointing at him.

“My point is that you’re kids with karate skills, a vampire bat who knows how to count from one to ten, a grouch that lives in a trashcan, a detective from Metropolis, and…above all…a guy wearing a mask and jumping off rooftops.” Gordon said, and the heroes didn’t seemed to be too intimidated by his words.

“Well, at least we’re not as bad as this guy.” Oscar said, reaching into his trashcan and handing Gordon a playing card that has a Joker on the other side of it. “Those kids from Endsville, Billy and Mandy, gave me that after they were willing to ‘forgive and forget’ about all that happened last night.” The others were confused by the card, which immediately became evidence once Oscar gave it to Gordon, more than they were of the relationship between the grouch and the kids from Endsville.

“Yeah, I’ve been hearing about this one.” Gordon said. “Armed robbery, double homicide.” He then looked up at Batman, while placing the card in a clear plastic evidence bag. “Got a taste for theatrics, like you.” Gordon handed the evidence bag to Batman, who glanced at the card for a moment.

“We’ll look into it.” Batman assured Gordon, right before they all heard a weird noise and noticed Dojo (in his large dragon form) appearing near the edge and gazing at the group on the rooftop.

“C’mon, kids! It’s time to shake a tail feather!” Dojo exclaimed. “I’m just now sensing a new Shen Gong Wu, somewhere beneath this city.”

“Just now?” Raimundo asked in a sarcastic voice, and the Xiaolin warriors went to climb onto Dojo, while Batman moved to the edge of the rooftop, looking out at the lights of Gotham, with his cloak billowing around him. Gordon quickly called out to him, before he had the chance to leave.

“Hey! I never said thank you.” Gordon said, and Batman turned to look back at him, Sean, Count, and Oscar.

“And you’ll never have to.” Batman stated, and Gordon smiled, as Batman dropped from the rooftop, gliding on the night wind with Dojo and the Xiaolin warriors.

“Boy, do I love this city.” Oscar uttered, and Sean looked over at him, smiling. Not often had he heard the word “love” come out of a grouch’s mouth before, unless he was referring to trash.



Sesame, D.C.
 

The Count

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Sorry I hadn't read this till now. Very good, love how everything ties in... Even a reference to The Monster at the End of this Story Superman/SS crossover which preceeded this one. Looking forward to your next crossover tae, whatever it may hold.
 

muppetwriter

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Thanks. My mind is just completely at ease after finishing this story that I'd put off for nearly five months straight. It was never really that hard to complete (just needed the movie to guide me through it all), but it was difficult in figuring out how I wanted to go about writing my version of it, which was where the writer's block kicked in.

My next crossover for Sesame, DC will be that Teen Titans/Sesame Street story that I'm promising to do, which will hopefully be sometime this year.

Of course, what I'll be focusing on real soon will be that Spidey/Muppets celebration that'll last from March 23rd to May 4th. You all are going to love that.:smile:
 

muppetwriter

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Ernie: Come on, Bert, old buddy. We don't want to be late.

Bert: Ernie, how could we be possibly late? It's a fan fiction story. In literature, time is endless.

Ernie: Wow. Never thought of it that way, Bert. Time's a lot like your bottlecap collection. *snickers*

Bert:*frowns* Ernie...


Oscar: Here we are, back in this dumb old story, doin' some dumb old commentary, for no dumb old reason. *looks around* Where the heck are Maria, Luis, Gordon, and Big Bird?

Ernie: They're busy getting the story that comes after this one done with the Muppet Writer, remember, Oscar?

Oscar: No I don't remember. I don't even care.

Count: That's four. Four commentators. Ah-ah-ah!

Bert: The Count's right. Looks like everyone's here. We can start the commentary now.

Ernie: Oh, wait. Hold on, Bert. *steps out*

Bert: Ernie! Wh-Where are you going? We don't have time for fooling around.

Ernie:*from outside* Gee, Bert. I thought time was endless in fan fiction. Remember? *snickers*


Oscar: Can we just get this over with? I've gotta get my fingernails dirtied in a few hours.

Count: I'll count the minutes.

Oscar: Do it, and you'll be countin' stars.

Ernie:*steps in with bag of popcorn* Alright. I'm all set.

Bert: Ernie, where did you get that?

Ernie: You just have to use your imagination, Bert. *snickers*

Bert:*frowns*


Chapter One​

I’m Detective Sean Thomas of the Metropolis police force. So what was I doing taking a bus all the way from the city that was like New York during the day to a city that was like New York during the night.

Ernie: Isn't Sesame Street supposed to be in New York?

Bert: Yes, Ernie. But in the Sesame, DC universe, it's in Metropolis.

Ernie: Isn't Metropolis supposed to be in Illinois? *snickers*


The reason exactly was that I was fixed on finding a guy named Bruce Wayne, who had been missing for nearly seven years, ever since the death of Joe Chill (the man responsible for the death of his parents). Chill was set to testify against Carmine Falcone, a mob boss who controlled the entire city of Gotham, in exchange for an early parole. Falcone wasn’t too happy with that deal, so he had someone kill Joe Chill, much to Bruce’s displeasure.

Bert: Can you believe the violence in this story?

Oscar: Yes. We were in it, remember?

Bert: Definitely not the average Sesame Street tale.


The last time I heard about Wayne was from Rachel Dawes, the current District Attorney of Gotham, when she accompanied him before he confronted Falcone one night. According to Rachel, Bruce had death on his mind, carrying a gun that he planned on killing Chill with. I wanted to ask her more, but after a while, she just couldn’t say any more. From the look in her eyes, she was truly crushed about whatever Bruce had been going through over the years that had passed after his parents’ death. Just about everyone had given up on him, going on with their lives and forgetting all about his. A man named Earle had even taken control of a company that was under his name, even going as far as to take it public.

Ernie: Wow. Can you imagine having everyone go on pretending you don't exist anymore?

Oscar: I can. I try to do it every time you twerps come past my garbage can.


Bruce had been declared dead by Alfred Pennyworth, the Waynes’ kind family butler, which was the main reason why everyone had moved on without him. However, I couldn’t buy that; it all just seemed too hard to believe, even if he had been gone for nearly seven years. I was fixed on solving the mystery of Bruce Wayne’s disappearance, and I had a couple of friends of mine from Sesame Street to assist me: Oscar the Grouch and Count von Count. They both loved Gotham City (Oscar loved it mostly due to its lack of happiness), so it didn’t really take much to convince them to help me out.

Bert: How could you ever love a dangerous place like Gotham City, Oscar? It's so filthy, dark, and polluted.

Oscar:*grins* Just the way I like it.


Instead of taking Oscar’s Sloppy Jalopy (I had to be in Gotham as soon as possible), we took a Greyhound straight from Metropolis to Gotham, getting there in less than twenty-four hours.

Oscar: Oh, c'mon. We coulda gotten there that fast. My car ain't that slow.

Most of the passengers sat in the back, due to the foul smell that was growing out of Oscar’s garbage can, which he brought along with him for the trip—I can’t begin to tell you how hard it was getting both inside the bus.

Count: That was definitely one foul smell.

Oscar: Who asked ya? You know, for creeps goin' into a city that smells twice as worse, you'd think they wouldn't even care.


Along the way, we met a group of kids from a place called the Xiaolin Temple. Their names were Raimundo Pedrosa (a street-smart boy from Brazil), Kimiko Tohomiko (an attractive, high-tech focused girl from Japan), Clay Bailey (a old-fashioned cowboy from Texas), and Omi (a small orphaned boy who was cute yet rather feisty and had a head that said, “Have a nice day”). They were accompanied by their faithful shape-shifting dragon, Dojo.

Ernie: Hey, I remember that show.

Bert: Yeah. Not as educational as ours, but it was still fun to watch.


These kids were actually monks-in-training whose purpose for coming to Gotham was close to ours. They had connections to Bruce Wayne as well, which helped me greatly in my case, because they actually had proof that Wayne was still alive. When we were only an hour away from the city, they began to tell me about their encounter with Bruce Wayne in the Himalayan Mountains, where he was on an important quest….

Oscar: Oh, boy. Here we go. The one part of the story where we're not involved.

Bert: It's still important, Oscar. Besides, how could you guys have fit into it?

Count: One flashback...


-----------------

Omi, Kimiko, Raimundo, and Clay were riding over the skies of the Himalayans on Dojo, searching for a Shen Gong Wu—artifacts that possess great magical powers—that was supposed to be around that area. They had been flying over the colossal mountains for several minutes, and they were each quickly beginning to grow impatient. That was until Kimiko spotted a man in a field of blue poppies, picking one of them up off the ground.

“Hey,” Kimiko uttered. “Maybe that guy can help us find our Shen Gong Wu.”

“Are you kiddin’?” Raimundo said. “How will he know what our Shen Gong Wu look like? He doesn’t know what a Shen Gong Wu is!”

Ernie: You think Shen Gong Wu really exist, Bert?

Bert: Of course not, Ernie. It's just a plot device.

Ernie: Plot device?

Bert: Yeah, you know...a MacGuffin?

Ernie: No thanks, Bert. I've already got some popcorn. *snickers*

Bert:*groans*


“If we show him what it looks like on the ancient scroll, then I am sure he will assist us in our mission.” Omi stated.

“Sounds alright to me.” Clay said, and Raimundo just scoffed at the notion, believing it to be far more of a waste of time than flying through the clouds in the chilly wind.

Oscar: Ya gotta give the kid credit for tryin'. I would've ditched the idea myself.

Dojo, who was beginning to develop a bit of a chill, turned and flew towards the poppy field. The mini-monks bundled themselves up in their warm coats, as the cold wind breezed past them. When they finally made it to the ground, they were greeted by an exhausted, freezing, and hungry Bruce Wayne, who looked as if he was on the verge of death.

Bert: Oh, wow. They just had to land at that moment. They couldn't have just left Mr. Wayne down there to die.

Oscar: He's a tough guy. He could handle a little chill.


“Greetings, sir.” Omi said. “We are sorry to bother you at this time, but we are searching for an artifact that is…”

“I can’t help you!” Wayne snapped, with a very hoarse voice. “No one will help me. No one will help anybody.”

Oscar: Ya got that right, Brucie!

Bert/Ernie: Shhhh!


The monks-in-training just stared blankly at Bruce, wondering if he had already lost his mind. Raimundo was just about ready to get back on Dojo and head off, but Kimiko grabbed him by the back of his pants and held him back.

“Oh, come on!” Raimundo yelled. “This guy’s already two French Fries sort of a Burger King Kids Meal!”

“He has fries from a king of burgers?” Omi questioned, totally obviously to the figure of speech that Raimundo had used.

Oscar: Ya know, one of the things I'll be actually happy about in this so-called sequel is the fact that kid isn't in it. He annoyed the heck outta me.

Ernie: I heard he's supposed to have a cameo, along with the other characters.

Oscar:*sighs* There is no Grouch God, is there?


“The point is that he can’t help us. He’s far gone as it is.” Raimundo said. “I’d give him two hours before he finally keels over.” Wayne, angered and annoyed by Raimundo’s words, just kept on moving until he finally flopped down into the snow. The mini-monks came to Bruce’s aid, but he immediately brushed them off of him, which offended Raimundo even more and puzzled the others.

“I need to do this on my own!” Bruce yelled, as he painfully got to his feet and tried to move on his own.

“Let us help you.” Kimiko offered. “You can’t possibly make it over these cold mountains on your own.”

“I have to.” Bruce said. “It is…part of my mission…to make it over these mountains…by myself.” The kids watched Bruce continue to move across the icy ridges on his own, some of them feeling sorry for the poor man. Raimundo did not once feel pity for the withering Bruce; he was focused only on finding the Shen Gong Wu, which he knew was an even more hopeless case than helping Bruce Wayne.

Oscar: My favorite character in the whole story.

“Come on, guys.” Raimundo said. “Let’s get back to the real reason we’re out here, freezing our butts off.” Omi, Clay, and Kimiko didn’t appreciate Raimundo’s attitude towards Bruce; and his attitude was the reason why they put their search on halt, long enough to keep an eye on Bruce from the skies, while on Dojo (who was just as concerned about Bruce as Omi, Clay, and Kimiko were).

Bert: I would've done the same thing. It's just not right leaving a person out there in the freezing weather.

Oscar: Yeah, ya would help him out, would ya, orange nose?


--------------------

“You kids actually helped that poor sap?” Oscar exclaimed, finding the thought a bit nauseating.

“Pathetic, isn’t it?” Raimundo said, right before Kimiko gave him a rough punch in the gut that almost made Raimundo puke.

“Hey, I would’ve just left him alone and go after that Shan Han Su…or whatever it is that you kids called it, and get back home in time for supper.” Oscar said, with a wicked chuckle that crept the mini-monks out a little. Seeing how freaked out they were by the green grouch, I attempted to calm them down, long enough to tell the rest of the story.

“Forget about him.” I said. “He’s always like that.”

“He has always been so green?” Omi asked.

“At least since 1970.” I joked, and everyone laughed, except for Oscar, who seemed very offended by my joke.

Bert: And you complain about the color of my nose.

Oscar: Hey, orange was the thing back then. Today, it's just another color in the crayon box.

Ernie: Whatever happened to that old color of yours, Oscar?

Oscar: Can we just drop it, before I start to lose it?


“Hey, stay out of my personal life, Thomas!” Oscar exclaimed, and I just waved off his negativity, focusing back on the mini-monks.

“So tell us more about Wayne?” I said. “What exactly was he doing all the way up there in the Himalayans?”

“We did not know why he was up there.” Omi said. “But we did keep our distance from him, long enough to see where he was going.”

Count: Two flashbacks...

Oscar: Will you cut that out?


---------------------

Omi, Kimiko, Raimundo, Clay, and Dojo watched Bruce climb up the steps to the vast doors of a monastery that they truly found intriguing. Just as Bruce unwrapped his severely frostbitten right fist and attempted to knock the ice-covered wooden door, Dojo landed softly behind him and the monks-in-training jumped off the shape-shifting dragon, interrupting Bruce.

“What a marvelous monastery!” Omi exclaimed, and a stunned Bruce turned around in surprise to see the mini-monks behind him.

Ernie: Hey, they used the word "marvelous" in the story?

Oscar: Yeah...so?

Ernie: This is a "Sesame, DC" story, isn't it?

Bert: Where are you getting at, Ernie?

Ernie: Um...I forget.


Oscar:*rolls eyes* Next time we do commentary, let's leave him at home.


“How did…Where did you…?” Bruce stammered, and deciding not to bother asking, he simply just shouted, “GET OUT OF HERE!”

“No prob., Bob.” Raimundo said, turning to leave while Omi just stared at Raimundo puzzlingly.

“How did you know his name was Bob?” Omi asked him.

“It isn’t!” Bruce yelled.

Ernie: Hey, we know a Bob.

Oscar: And I wish we didn't.


“Then what is your name, if you do not mind me asking, sir?” Omi inquired.

“If it’ll get you away from here, no…I don’t mind.” Bruce said, and he was a bit hesitant at first, wondering if exposing his identity to these kids will ruin his personal exile from Gotham. But since they didn’t seem like the type who would come from the streets of Gotham, he didn’t fret any longer. “Wayne. My name is Bruce Wayne.”

“Well, it’s a pleasure to make yer acquaintance, Mr. Wayne.” Clay said, and when he put his left hand out for Bruce to shake, Bruce just stared at it for a long time, not once putting his own hands out to shake it. Clay, sensing of a bit of hostility still left in the air, held back his hand and moved away from Bruce. Bruce’s actions were continuing to offend Raimundo, who was twice as agitated as he was.

“Dude, what’s your problem?” Raimundo asked him. “Something’s gotta have you acting so hostile, besides this cold weather.” Raimundo looked up at the monastery that Bruce was about to enter. “What’s in there, man?” Bruce seriously didn’t want the mini-monks to get into his business, only because he wasn’t absolutely certain if their involvement would ruin his mission. But he was at a point where he just did not care what would happen to him. He was tired, emotionally drained, and almost ready to let Death take his soul away to Heaven or h*ll.

Ernie: Oh, no. They just used a bad word.

Bert: Technically it's not bad, Ernie, if it's used in a biblical sense.

Oscar: Tell that to the folks censorin' it. I swear, if it weren't for them, I'd really tell you twerps how I feel.


“You really want to know what’s in there?” Bruce said, and Raimundo nodded along with the other monks-in-training, just before he turned back to the door and pounded against it with his frostbitten fist, his knocks echoing deep within. There was no response, and the monks-in-training were left looking to each other in confusion. Bruce lowered his forehead to the door, with his pounding accelerating to a frenzy.

“I do not believe anyone is home.” Omi said.

“THERE HAS TO BE!” Bruce cried, just before he and the others heard a grinding noise from within. Bruce stopped and straightened up, as they watched the doors swing open to darkness. Bruce and the mini-monks moved forward into the low-ceilinged wooden hall that was lit with flickering lamps. As the doors shut behind them, they noticed a dark robbed figure sitting on a raised platform at the far end; it was Ra’s Al Ghul.

Ernie: Wow. This just got a little scary.

-----------------------

“Ra’s Al Ghul?” I said, finding the name sounding like something out of a Bruce Lee movie. “Who was this guy?”

“We could only assume that he was Bruce’s master.” Kimiko said.

“The fella looked a lot like Master Fung, our Xiaolin master.” Clay commented.

“Ah, most of these kung fu masters look all alike.” Dojo said.

“Except this man did not look as friendly as Master Fung.” Omi contradicted. “In fact, he looked very suspicious, as if he was plotting something very wicked.”

“You could tell all of that just by looking at him?” I asked the little guy.

“That, and from what he did later on.” Omi said. “But we are getting far too ahead of ourselves.”

Count: Three flashbacks...

Oscar: I'm about to officially lose it here.


-------------------

While Omi, Raimundo, Clay, Kimiko, and Dojo remained where they were standing, Bruce moved unsteadily towards Ra’s Al Ghul, just as armed warriors of various races emerged from the shadows, with their bows taut and swords drawn, looking a lot like ninjas that we just waiting for the visitors to make a move. The mini-monks braced themselves for battle, moving in their fighting stance, while Bruce just froze.

Ernie: Isn't he already freezing?

Bert: Figure of speech, Ernie.

Ernie: How many of them are there?


“Wait.” A voice said, and the warriors held their ground, long enough for the visitors to see a powerfully-built, distinguished, well-dressed man leaning against a nearby pillar.

“Henri Ducard.” Bruce uttered, while the mini-monks still kept themselves in their stances, expecting someone to make a move. It was an uneasy atmosphere, and if one of them lowered their defenses, then they would be sure not to make it out of that monastery alive. Bruce reached into his layers of clothing and pulled out the double-bloomed blue poppy that he had plucked from the field, holding it out with shaky hands.

Oscar:*sarcastically* Wow. Can ya believe Ducard and Ra's Al Ghul are the same guy?

Bert/Ernie: OSCAR!

Count: One major spoiler!

Oscar: Hey, I love spoilin'. It's a common thing for a Grouch. *cackles*


Ra’s Al Ghul started to speak in Urdu, leaving Ducard to translate. “Fear has been your guide. And, apparently, so have four small children and a strange dragon.”

“Hey, who ya callin’ strange, bud?” exclaimed an offended Dojo.

“Uh, I believe it was the other man that called you strange, Dojo.” Omi said, gesturing towards Ra’s Al Ghul. But their focus was mainly on Ducard, whose focus was solely on Bruce.

“Why have you brought them here?” Ducard asked him.

“I tried to keep them away from me…but they refused.” Bruce explained. “They don’t mean any harm. They were only trying to help…”

“No need to explain yourself, Wayne.” Ducard said. “We shall deal with them later.” The mini-monks heard this, and each of their eyes went to one of the armed warriors in the room, wondering if one of them would be left to execute them. If that was going to be the case, then Ra’s Al Ghul would need more than just one warrior to take them down.

Ra’s Al Ghul continued speaking in Urdu, and Ducard continued translating. “You must advance or fear will keep you on your knees. We will help you conquer your fear. In exchange, you will renounce the cities of man. You will live in solitude. You will be a member of the League of Shadows. And you will be without fear.”

Bert: Couldn't they have thought a nicer name than "League of Shadows"?

Oscar: What would ya have preferred? Super Friends?

Ernie: Nope. That's already taken.


The monks-in-training were impressed by some of the things that the mysterious organization was going to be teaching Bruce. It was far different from what Master Fung and the other monks had been teaching them at the Xiaolin Temple, which was why they found it intriguing yet disturbing at the same time. Relaxing their bodies from their fighting stances, the mini-monks watched Ducard as he took the flower from Bruce and considered its delicate blue petals.

“Are you ready to begin?” Ducard asked Bruce, and the mini-monks couldn’t believe that he would ask him such a question, seeing how exhausted and withered he was from his long journey. Ducard threaded the flower through the buttonhole of his lapel, as Wayne looked at him, shaking with hunger and fatigue.

“Ready?” Bruce said. “I…I can barely…” Before he cold finish, Ducard kicked Wayne, sending him crashing to the floor. The mini-monks, surprised by Ducard’s sudden action, were about to step in and interfere, until they were halted and contained by some of Ra’s armed ninjas.

Oscar: Ha, ha! Now it's gettin' good!

“Oh, come on!” Raimundo yelled.

“That ain’t fair fightin’, partner.” Clay stated.

“He needs to regain his strength first.” Kimiko said. “Did you see what he had to go through out there?”

“He is not prepared.” Omi uttered.

“Silence!” Ducard yelled, and the mini-monks immediately got quiet. “Death does not wait for anyone to be ready.” Bruce crawled, gasping for breath, just as Ducard struck him directly in the ribs. “Death is not considerate or fair. And make no mistake…today, death is your opponent.” Ducard turned, whipping his leg in a fearsome roundhouse kick aimed straight at Bruce’s neck. But Wayne blocked the kick with a lateral movement of his forearm.

Bert: I don't think I can handle this much violence in one scene.

Oscar: And yet ya can handle it in an entire story that yer co-starring in. Unbelievable.


“Whoa!” Omi exclaimed, truly impressed by Bruce’s counter.

Bruce stared at Ducard, with his eyes blazing. Ducard just smiled, as Wayne raised up and assumed a martial stance. Ducard struck and Wayne blocked and parried, driving his body through pain into a series of fluid, skilled moves. Omi, Kimiko, Raimundo, Clay, and Dojo were each impressed by the moves that were being displayed from both men (more from Bruce than Ducard).

“Facing death, you learn the truth…” Ducard instructed, as his head smashed Wayne’s cheek, leaving Wayne faltering. “You are weak…” He smashed Wayne in the groin, “You are alone…” He slammed Wayne’s chin, sending him down hard, “And you are afraid.” The mini-monks just could not believe the fight they had just witnessed. The armed warriors released their hold on them, after sensing their bodies losing their tension, as Ducard crouched at Wayne’s side, looking into his glazed eyes. “But not of me.” He said that curiously, as he pulled the flower from his lapel and leaned in close to replace it on Wayne’s chest and whisper in his ear.

---------------------

“What did he say to him?” I asked the mini-monks, who far more intrigued by the story than I was (and they were the ones that had supposedly lived through it all).

“He asked, ‘What do you fear?’.” Kimiko said. “And Bruce had this look on his face that almost told us exactly what he was afraid of.”

“Well, what was it?” Oscar asked, showing a little bit of interest.

Oscar: "A little bit"? Yeah, right. I never really cared what was happenin' in this stupid scene. I just wanted to get it over with.

“We are not quite certain.” Omi said, with a look on disappointment on his face.

“If we had brought the Shadow of Fear with us, then it’d be easy to tell what his biggest fear was.” Raimundo said, and I could only assume that this “Shadow of Fear” was another one of their Shen Gong Wu artifacts.

“However, we did get an idea that it must’ve had something to do with the death of his parents.” Kimiko said, and Count, Oscar, and I knew what she was talking about. We all had heard about how Thomas and Martha Wayne had been gunned down by Joe Chill in an alleyway, on the same night that Bruce and his parents went to see a performance at the Gotham Opera House. I was about the same age Bruce was the night that had happened. And while I was home with my parents, watching Tom & Jerry cartoons on television, he was watching his folks bleeding in front of him.

Bert: I really can't find the difference to be honest.

“Did you kids eavesdrop on one of their conversations or something?” I asked, not trying to sound like I was offending them; but they understood completely.

“Sort of.” Kimiko said. “We decided to stick around in the monastery, long enough to be ready to go back out and continue on our search for the Shen Gong Wu we were looking for. And we’re lucky that we did, because there a lot more to Bruce Wayne, as well as this League of Shadows, than we expected.”

Count: That's four flashbacks! Ah-ah-ah!

Oscar:*groans*

Ernie: Just be glad we're not watching Lost, Oscar. *snickers*


---------------------

“And do you still feel responsible for your parents’ death?” Ducard asked, as he led Wayne, Omi, Kimiko, Clay, and Raimundo along a screened passage that overlooked the extraordinary mountains.

“My anger outweighs my guilt.” Bruce remarked, as Ducard opened a door and led the group onto a mezzanine level stacked with boxes and bottles. Ninjas poured powders into pockets, mixing compounds. Ducard took a pinch of powder and threw it down. There was an abrupt explosion that startled Wayne and the mini-monks (Kimiko jumped into Clay’s arms, much to his surprise).

“Woo-Wee! Now that’s somethin’ else!” Clay exclaimed, as Ducard smiled good-naturedly.

“Advanced techniques of Ninjitsu employ explosive powders.” He said.

“As weapons?” Bruce asked.

“Or distractions.” Ducard added. “Theatricality and deception are powerful agents.”

“Strange.” Omi said, pondering over what Ducard had mentioned. “Master Fung never taught us such a thing.”

“As you come to learn our ways, young monk, you’ll know that the League of Shadows are nothing like Xiaolins.” Ducard said, and Omi could believe that already, after being a witness to Ducard’s teachings. “To be a great warrior is not enough. Flesh and blood, however skilled, can be destroyed…you must be more than just a man in the minds of your opponents.” Ducard took a pinch of powder and handed it to Bruce. After listening to Ducard, Bruce took the powder and tossed it, creating an explosion of his own.

Ernie: Being a trained ninja sure looks like fun. We should take lessons, Bert.

Bert: No thanks, Ernie. What if I accidentally hurt someone...or myself?

Ernie: Good point. It took you a long time just to avoid blowing bubblegum without getting any on your unibrow. *snickers*

Bert:*sarcastically* Very funny, Ernie.


Later that same day, the group had headed out of the monastery and onto a frozen lake in the Himalayas, where Wayne and Ducard circled each other on the ice and sword-fighting, while Omi, Kimiko, Clay, and Raimundo were watching from a far distance, none of them wearing skates to help keep their balance. There were often at times when Clay, Raimundo, and Kimiko had slipped and fell right on their behinds, whereas Omi was keeping a delicate balance…on one foot.

Count: One foot...very impressive. Ah-ah!

“Man! How can those two swordfight on ice?” Raimundo exclaimed. “I’m having a hard enough time keepin’ my butt from gettin’ icy bruises!” The four of them watched Ducard strike at Wayne, who deflected the blow using a silver gauntlet with three thick, hook-like projections known as scallops.

“I guess it’s all got to do with being a League of Shadows warrior.” Clay assumed, standing up one minute and falling down the next, nearly putting a crack in the ice. “Boy, this is just a shame, especially considering the fact that I’m supposed to be the Xiaolin Dragon of Earth.”

“Actually, Clay, ice represents a mixture of wind and water.” Omi said, still keeping his delicate balance on one foot. “I, being a Xiaolin Dragon of Water, am able to keep my balance due to my connection to the frozen water.”

“Then what about Raimundo?” Clay asked. “He’s barely able to get in touch with his element, while slipping and sliding across this ice.”

“It is a hard task to get in touch with the wind element, especially after the water has already been frozen by the wind.” Omi stated, while Raimundo was sliding past him and Clay, with a frustrated look on his face.

“Thanks for stating the obvious, Omi.” Raimundo said, sarcastically, and an oblivious Omi took it as a compliment.

Ernie: Wow. This sure does remind me of that one Christmas special we did a long time ago.

Bert: Yeah. It sure has been a long time, hasn't it, Oscar?


Oscar: My fondest memory is bein' thrown down the stairs and through a wall. Ever since then, I've never had such great fun.

Count: Thirty long years.


“You’re welcome.” Omi said, and as the boys were either keeping a perfect balance or losing control, Kimiko just sat where she was on the ice (not caring if she got frostbite in the butt or what) and focused on Bruce and Ducard, intrigued by their sword-fighting. Ducard skidded left, with his breath steaming, feinting with his sword. Wayne stepped sideways on the ice, with his foot landing on a thin patch that creaked, water bubbling underneath.

“Mind your surrounding. Always.” Ducard instructed, just as Wayne struck, leaving Ducard to block with his own bronze gauntlet. Bruce slipped right and flew in with a short thrust. Ducard’s arm flipped down in a backhand move, catching Wayne’s sword in one of his scallops. “Your parents’ death was not your fault.” Ducard rotated his arm, wrenching Wayne’s sword from his grasp, causing it to skid along the ice. “It was your father’s.”

Kimiko watched closely, with much interest, as an enraged Bruce dived at Ducard, swinging at him with the scallops, furious and reckless. Ducard parried with his sword, and the two locked, with their noises inches apart from each other. Bruce was breathing heavily, showing some anger in front of Ducard.

“Anger does not change the fact that your father failed to act.” Ducard said.

“The man had a gun!” Bruce snapped.

“Would that stop you?” Ducard asked.

“I’ve had training…”

“The training is nothing. The will to take control is everything.” Ducard stated. “Your father trusted his city, its logic…he thought he understood the attacker and could simply give him what he wanted.” Bruce considered Ducard’s words; his breathing began to slow down, showing some calmness taking over, as the two separated. “Your father did not understand the forces of decay. Cities like Gotham are in their death throes…chaotic, grotesque, and beyond the point of saving.”

“Beyond saving?” Bruce remarked. “You believe that?”

“It is not right that one must come to so far to see the world as it is meant to be.” Ducard said, as he regarded the beautiful landscape. “Purity…Serenity…Solitude. These are the qualities we hold dear.” Omi, Kimiko, Clay, and Raimundo stopped their activity on the ice, long enough to all listen to Ducard. “But the important thing is whether you believe it.” Wayne just stared at Ducard, thinking about all that he was telling him. “Can Gotham be saved, or is she an ailing ancestor whose time has run?”

Ernie: Who knew there could be so much intensity around ice-skating?

---------------------

“I have to agree.” I said. “Gotham isn’t exactly one of the most tourist-friendly places to visit in the world.”

“What’re ya talkin’ about?” Oscar said. “This is a great place to visit! Just look!” Oscar gestured out the window, which had shown the horrific atmosphere of Gotham City. There were decaying buildings, several homeless people on the streets (either pushing shopping carts, mugging those that had money or food, or standing by flaming oil drums), and police sirens blaring in the distance.

Oscar: Oh, please. I've seen worst and that ain't it.

Bert: Worst to you is like beautiful, isn't it?

Oscar: It most certainly is.


“Oh, my!” Count uttered. “There are definitely more than fifteen homeless people in these streets. Good heavens.”

“Oscar, if you haven’t noticed, this place isn’t exactly Metropolis.” I said.

“That’s the beauty of it!” Oscar exclaimed. “There aren’t any idiots passing by and saying hello to each other, there aren’t weirdoes telling what the letter of the day is, and there definitely ain’t anything clean around here either!” Oscar rolled down the window and stuck his head out, breathing in all of the polluted air that he found fascinating, while the rest of us were holding our breaths. “Not a clean speck in the area!” When Oscar rolled the window back up, we all breathed in the somewhat clean air inside the bus.

“I have never been to this city before, but from that fierce odor, it is no walk in the playground.” Omi said, obviously fouling up in his use of slang, leaving one of his companions have a chance to correct him.

“That’s park, Omi.” Kimiko said.

“Park…Playground…Who cares?” Oscar remarked. “Gotham is one of the greatest cities in the world today. And this Ducard guy doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

“Well, despite whatever Ducard believes, Bruce Wayne left this city for a reason.” I indicated. “But the question is…why did he leave?”

“He thought he could lose himself, because he felt useless as Bruce Wayne.” Kimiko explained. “He sought knowledge of the criminal world, needing to understand the thoughts and feelings of those who stood in the shadows. He needed to feel the fear before a crime…and the thrill of success, without becoming one of them.”

“Did he think he would find something?” I asked.

“He thought he’d learn what he needed to do with his skills and his anger.” Clay said. “But the harder he looked…the less he saw and knew.”

“And let me guess…” I said, beginning to figure out the story, “He got to the point where he wasn’t even sure what he’d been looking for in the first place and became lost.”

“Exactly.” Omi said. “And that is where our story comes in.”

“Ducard found Bruce in a Bhutanese prison for helping a gang of criminals steal boxes that were, ironically, the property of his family business.” Kimiko said. “After he sprang him out is where we came in to all of this.” From what the kids had told me, I couldn’t believe how Bruce Wayne had spent his seven years of exile from Gotham. Becoming a petty thief and training under an ancient organization of Ninjas was all very hard to swallow, but the way these mini-monks were telling the story, I had to believe some of it was true.

“So, judging from the trip you kids are taking to Gotham by bus and not by your dragon friend there,” When I mentioned Dojo, he had a big smile on his face, indicating his pleasure for the mini-monks and their decision of transportation to Gotham, “I’m assuming that Bruce Wayne has to be alive and back in the city as we speak, right?”

“That is correct.” Omi said.

“But what made him come back?” I asked.

“That is, how you say here in America, where the plot gets swollen.” Omi replied, yet I had no idea what he was talking about, due to the bad slang that was used.

“What?” I exclaimed.

“He means this is where the plot thickens.” Kimiko said, and I listened closely to the climax of their story, as well as the bad slang that could’ve possibly been included.

Oscar: Another thing I hated about that kid.

END OF CHAPTER ONE​

Oscar: Well, whaddya know...end of story. Guess that's it. Let's go, twerps.

Ernie: Hold on, Oscar. It's only the end of Chapter One.

Bert: We still have a lot to go.


Count: Eight more wonderful chapters!

Oscar: You've got to be kiddin' me. *groans*
 

muppetwriter

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If the narration seems a little awkward in this next chapter, that's because it's being narrated by Elmo.:smile:

Oscar: Oh, now this should get interesting quick.

Chapter Two​

Elmo had never been to a place like Gotham before; it was really different from the place that Elmo lives, Metropolis. It was so dark and unhappy, which was why Elmo believed Oscar liked to come there so much. If Elmo hadn’t come with Daphne, Fred, Velma, Shaggy, and Scooby-Doo, then Elmo would be really, really scared right now. An hour in such a dark, unhappy place by himself, and Elmo would be wishing he was back in Elmo’s World. And Elmo wasn’t the only one that was scared of Gotham City.

Oscar: What's there to be scared of? If there's anybody who I would've thought enjoyed Gotham, it was that little furball.

“Fred, I know they have some of the best diners in Gotham,” Shaggy said, “But I’d rather be eating and then screaming, instead of screaming before eating.” No one, including Elmo, knew what Shaggy was talking about, as Fred drove the Mystery Machine (Elmo thinks this is a really cool car) through the dark, unhappy streets of Gotham.

“What’re you babbling about, Shaggy?” Velma asked.

“I just think that if we’re going to eat at someplace less intimidating, then it might as well be at the malt shop in Metropolis.” Shaggy replied.

“We didn’t come to Metropolis just to eat, Shaggy.” Fred said. “We’re here to investigate some of the weird activity that’s been taking place lately.” Fred tossed a newspaper backwards to Shaggy; it was one of those newspapers made by the Daily Planet (Elmo’s favorite paper, even though Elmo can’t read all that much). “According to Perry White, they have been people turning into timid rabbits, whenever some weird smoke comes flying their way.”

Ernie: Hey, Bert. There's our newspaper: The Daily Planet. Neat, huh?

Bert: Yeah, it's great, Ernie. But I'm trying to listen...I mean, read.


“Do they really become rabbits?” Elmo asked, and Elmo must’ve made a joke, because Fred, Daphne, and Velma chuckled over what Elmo said. Daphne turned and smiled at Elmo, playfully rubbing her fingers through the fur on Elmo’s head, which tickled Elmo a little.

Oscar: I believe the world's had enough of a ticklish Elmo. I know I have.

“You’re so precious, Elmo,” Daphne said, “Which is what we brought you along. You just lighten up this tense atmosphere with your positive Sesame Street attitude.” Elmo was glad that Daphne said that, because it made Elmo feel so wanted. Daphne had always appreciated Elmo’s company, more than she did the rest of Mystery Inc.

“Thank you, Daphne.” Elmo told Daphne, politely.

“So who is this Jonathan Crane guy that we’re meeting?” Shaggy asked, after reading the Daily Planet newspaper.

“He’s a psychiatrist that specializes in psychopharmacology at Arkham Asylum, which is where we will be meeting him this afternoon.” Velma said, and Shaggy & Scooby both looked really confused.

Oscar: Psycho what?

Bert: Psychopara...Psychomara...Oh, he studies people that are funny in the head.

Ernie: That's a nice way of putting it, Bert. *snickers*


“Afternoon?” Shaggy exclaimed, and he & Scooby stuck their heads out the window and looked up at the dark, cloudy sky. “How can you tell?”

“Even though you can’t see the sun, Shaggy,” Velma said, and Elmo could tell she was about to talk science, just from the way her voice sounded, “It doesn’t particularly mean it’s nighttime. The clouds shrouding the sun are illuminated by its light that often at times shines through them, thus helping us realize that it’s still daytime. When it’s nighttime, you’ll actually see a faded image of the moon pass the clouds.”

“Cloudy days are always so interesting.” Daphne said. “Sometimes, when the clouds are matted together so nicely, projected images can appear clearly on their surface and look as if you’re watching a movie. Cool, huh?” Elmo was impressed how smart Daphne was; she was almost as smart as Velma.

“It’d be cooler if we had some popcorn to go with that movie.” Shaggy said, which Elmo expected him to say afterwards.

Ernie: I've got some right here.

Oscar: Oh, like they could really hear you right now. *rolls eyes*

Shaggy:*momentarily pops out of story* Hey, like, thanks, man. *takes popcorn from Ernie and returns to story*

Oscar:*mouth wide open and speechless*

Ernie: Don't you know, Oscar? Anything can happen in fiction. *snickers*


“Well, there’s not going to be a movie or popcorn where we’re going.” Fred said, and he looked up at the rearview mirror to see Elmo, talking to him while he was driving. “Listen, Elmo, I’m glad that you came with us; but I don’t think this Asylum would be a good place for you to go into. It might be too…disturbing for ya, little guy.”

“That’s okay, Fred.” Elmo told him. “Elmo will feel safe, knowing that his friends will be there to keep him safe.” Elmo expected to see happy looks on his friends’ faces; but everybody looked so scared and worried that they couldn’t even put up a smile. Elmo hoped they weren’t frightened, because Elmo wasn’t.

Oscar: Oh, Arkham isn't so bad, once you spend the night there.

Bert: It's an asylum, Oscar! Filled with cranky people!

Oscar: And your point is?


It didn’t take that long for Elmo and his Mystery Inc. friends to arrive at Arkham Asylum, a place in the middle of Gotham that looked even more unhappy than the rest of the city. From what Velma told Elmo during the trip between Gotham and Metropolis, Arkham Asylum was some kind of a hospital where they put a lot of people who get really sad or really sick and come there to be happy and better again. Elmo was excited to come to this place and didn’t understand why his friends didn’t want him to be there, because Elmo loves meeting happy people.

Elmo found out from his friends that the man we were going to see, Jonathan Crane, was a high-ranking doctor (or an administrator, whatever that is) at Arkham Asylum and a very nice person. When we arrived at Arkham Asylum, Fred told some of the nice police officers about the reason we were there, and they let us right in. Elmo thought that Arkham Asylum was an interesting place to see, but it looked like it could use some cleaning (Oscar would definitely enjoy this place).

Oscar: You're darn right I would. That place is better than a condo.

Elmo and his friends were led through a hallway by a doctor, where there were large, metal doors with people behind them, shouting out a lot of things that Elmo didn’t understand.

“Hey! Hey!” One man shouted through a small, rectangular hole in the large door, pointing directly at Elmo. “He has finally come! He has come to take us all down with him! We will be judged for our sins! Our bodies will burn and our souls will be his to feast upon!” Before Elmo could hear the rest of what this man was saying, Daphne came up to Elmo and led Elmo away from the man, who seemed to get sad again as he watched Elmo leave. “No, please! I admit that I have sinned! I deserve to go to his palace in the flaming pits!” Elmo looked back at the man, as Daphne led Elmo away, and when Elmo couldn’t see him anymore, Elmo looked up at the worried Daphne.

Ernie: Poor Elmo. That's no place for a furry red monster like him.

Bert: Yeah, that one guy was just downright disturbed.


Oscar: You two really ought to lighten up.


“Who did that sad man think Elmo was, Daphne?” Elmo asked her, and it took her a long time to respond to Elmo’s question.

“Uh…never mind, Elmo.” Daphne said. “Let’s just go see Dr. Crane, shall we?”

“Okay.” Elmo said, and Elmo & Daphne followed their friends into a room that seemed much nicer than the rest of Arkham Asylum, where Dr. Jonathan Crane was sitting at a table. He did look very nice and made Elmo feel like he was back in Sesame Street again.

Oscar: Heh! What 'til he gets a load of him by the end of the story!

“Dr. Crane,” Velma said, as she approached him and shook his hand. “It is indeed a pleasure to see you in person.”

“You must be Velma Dinkley, and the rest must be the other members of Mystery Inc.” Dr. Crane said, with a smile. “Please. Everyone take a seat.” Elmo and his friends sat down at the table, just as Dr. Crane did at the same time. “Miss Dinkley, when I received the message from my secretary, I couldn’t help but to feel a little curious. What makes you believe that I have some connections to the odd behaviors that have been reported in this city?”

“Well, mostly because the same behaviors have been reported in this asylum.” Velma said. “I don’t mean any offense, Dr. Crane. I have admired your work for years now. But when clues start pointing in the directions of people or places that you least suspect, we can’t help but to do a little investigating on that person or place.”

“I completely understand, Miss Dinkley.” Dr. Crane said. “But I’m afraid that I can’t help you and your friends out on your case, because I haven’t been aware of any behaviors similar to that on the streets of Gotham.”

“But when these behaviors are spotted, the first place that the authorities take the people who are suffering is here.” Daphne said.

“Not exactly.” Dr. Crane said. “Sometimes they take them to regular hospitals to determine their diagnosis, and if it is indeed serious, then they come here to Arkham for further treatment. But we haven’t received any patients like the ones that are described in the papers. However, a few of our current patients here at Arkham have had some rare ‘attacks,’ claiming to have seen a scarecrow in their rooms.” Elmo noticed how puzzled his Mystery Inc. friends looked, after Dr. Crane said that.

Oscar: And he ain't talking about your typical Wizard of Oz scarecrow here.

Ernie: Wow. This is getting really, really creepy.

Bert: I agree with you completely, Ernie.


Count: That's one creepy scene.


“A scarecrow?” Fred said.

“Yes.” Dr. Crane said. “And there are often times when I use a method that some other psychiatrists would find rather odd, but I think it’ll help our patients get over their episodes.” Dr. Crane then picked up his briefcase and set it down on the table to unlock it. He reached into it and pulled out the scariest mask that Elmo had ever seen. Elmo’s Mystery Inc. friends looked closely at the mask, with looks on their faces that told how confused they were.

This helps them get over their episodes?” Daphne asked.

“Yes,” Dr. Crane said, “And I realize that it seems a little peculiar…”

“Man, you don’t know the half of it.” Shaggy interrupted, and the other Mystery Inc. friends shushed him, long enough to listen to Dr. Crane.

“But I assure you that it is a logical method that I would suggest other psychiatrists to consider taking with their patients.” Dr. Crane said, and Elmo’s Mystery Inc. friends looked at each other, looking even more worried than they were when they had arrived at Arkham Asylum.

“With all due respect, Dr. Crane,” Velma said, “This method seems like it might keep the inmates inside Arkham longer than expected.”

“Believe me, Miss Dinkley.” Dr. Crane said, with a smile. “It works.”

Bert: That's just really unethical. I mean who uses fear as a way to cure somebody.

Ernie: Unless it's for hiccups. *snickers*

Bert: It's not funny, Ernie. It's really...strange.


“For the sake of your career, I hope so.” Velma told Dr. Crane, who afterwards looked at his wristwatch and then towards the window inside the room.

“Well, I’m sorry that our meeting had to be so abrupt,” Dr. Crane said, as he got up from the table. “But I really must be going. I have some other business to attend to at the moment.” He put the scary mask back in his briefcase and closed it, before he started walking towards the door. “I do wish you kids the best of luck and hope that any meddling you plan on doing will keep the culprit from getting away.” With another happy smile, Dr. Crane walked out of the room, leaving Elmo and his Mystery Inc. friends alone to talk.

“Is it just me or was that last thing he said a crack at us being meddling kids?” Shaggy asked, looking a little offended, while Scooby stuck his tongue out at the door.

“He seems too weird to be a ‘normal’ psychiatrist,” Daphne said. “Not too mention arrogant.” Daphne then looked over at Velma and realized the mistake she made, insulting someone that Velma admired in front of her. “Oh, I’m sorry, Velma. I forgot you are a big admirer of his.”

“That’s alright, Daphne.” Velma said, not seeming to be bothered. “I just said all that stuff to butter him up, hoping that he would cough up some information about the odd behaviors in Gotham. Unfortunately, it backfired on me.” Elmo was a little surprised to hear Velma admit that, because all she had to do was ask Dr. Crane nicely.

Oscar: Boy, is Elmo ever the gullible one! You don't just ask someone nicely for information they wouldn't want to give ya. You have to force them to fork it over. *cackles*

“Well, it’s not too late to find out more about him.” Fred said. “We’ve got a mystery on our hands, gang, and we’re not gonna give up so quickly.”

“What do you plan for us to do next, Freddy?” Daphne asked.

“Crane said that he had some other business to attend to.” Fred said. “How much you guys wanna bet that business has something to do with the strange behaviors?”

“That’s one bet that I’d like to lose.” Shaggy said.

Ernie: Gee, you would think the Mystery Inc. kids would teach not to bet.

Bert: It's another figure of speech, Ernie.

Ernie: Wow. How many is that?


Count: Two, to be exact. Ah-ah-ah!


“Come on, Shag.” Fred said. “This is one mystery that might saved millions of lives, if we’re able to get it solved.”

“Fred’s right, Shaggy.” Velma said. “What if this thing goes beyond Gotham and gets to other places, like Metropolis.”

“Or Sesame Street.” Elmo said, and after Elmo said that, Elmo started to feel a little worried. Elmo looked down at his feet, thinking about all of Elmo’s friends on Sesame Street and if they got sad or sick themselves. Elmo felt a hand come down on his shoulders and looked up to see Daphne smiling at Elmo again.

“Ohh, poor Elmo.” Daphne said. “We’ll make sure nothing bad will happen to Sesame Street. Right, Shaggy?” Elmo looked at Shaggy, who was more worried than Elmo was; but he didn’t seem so worried, after he and Scooby looked at each other and thought about what Elmo’s other Mystery Inc. friends said.

“R-Right, D-Daphne.” Shaggy stammered.

“Alright, gang.” Fred said. “Let’s go out and look for clues that’ll help us find out where Dr. Crane is going.”

“One of the doctors should know where might be going.” Daphne said. “We can always ask them.”

“Or…we can call Crane’s secretary.” Velma said, pulling out the cell phone that Daphne let her borrow and called that person. “Hello? Mrs. Sullivan? I missed my meeting with Dr. Crane today and was wondering if there was another time I could meet him, say…later tonight by any chance?” Velma got quiet for a moment and listened to the secretary’s voice over the phone. Elmo could tell she got the answer she wanted, because a big smile appeared on her face, as she looked at Elmo and the others. “Oh, so Dr. Crane has an appointment of his own that he’s going to with Carmine Falcone at the docks.”

“The mob boss?” Fred said, while Velma was listening to the secretary.

“No, Mrs. Sullivan, I’ll just catch Dr. Crane at another time. Thank you.” Velma said, and right after she hung up the phone, we started walking out of the room. Elmo didn’t really understand the rest of the stuff that his Mystery Inc. friends were talking about, but every time they mentioned the name, Carmine Falcone, they all just got really nervous. Elmo can never understand grownups.

Count: That is one special plot twist.

Oscar: Are ya countin' plot twists now? Who do you think ya are? M. Night Shama-Whatever-His-Name-Is?


A little later, Elmo and his Mystery Inc. friends arrived at the docks, where we saw big, mean-looking men taking boxes out from an open container. Fred had parked the Mystery Machine pretty far from where these men were working. Elmo and Scooby just sat quietly, while Fred, Daphne, Shaggy, and Velma looked through some binoculars to see what was going on.

“There’s a sedan pulling up.” Fred said.

“I wonder who’s in it.” Daphne said, and after a few seconds, they all gasped in surprise. “Is it that Detective Flass?”

“As in Gotham Police Detective Flass?” Velma said, sounding just as surprised as Daphne did. “Please tell me he’s here to raid out these crooks.”

“Doesn’t look like it.” Fred said. “He just ripped open that stuffed toy like he was anxious to see what was in it.”

“What is in those toys anyway?” Shaggy asked.

“It looks like some kind of packaged drug.” Velma said, before Daphne gasped again.

Ernie:*gasps himself* Oh, no! Drugs are the worst thing in the world! This is really bad, Bert! Really bad! Oh, no! What will they do?

Bert: Ernie, will you keep quiet? We're trying to focus on the story.


Oscar: Heh. Speak for yourself, orange nose.


“He did not just hand that drug-filled toy back to that crook, did he?” Daphne asked, not sounding very happy at all, as she said that.

“Gang, it looks like this mystery’s a lot bigger and more dangerous than we expected.” Fred said, moving his binoculars away from his eyes, at the same time Velma, Daphne, and Shaggy did. “Even the police are in on this!”

Count: That's two plot twists.

Oscar: Can't you count something else? Like how many times Elmo's name has popped up?

Count: I already have. It's been...

Oscar: Forget it! I don't wanna know!


“Maybe Detective Flass is just goin’ undercover.” Shaggy said.

“Very likely, Shaggy.” Velma said. “He has his badge with him.”

“Maybe he’s lightly undercover.” Shaggy said, and Velma rolled her eyes at Shaggy’s silly comment, putting the binoculars up to her eyes again.

“What’s he doing now, Velma?” Daphne asked.

“He’s going inside the warehouse, probably meet up with Falcone and Crane.” Velma said, and Elmo then noticed the determined look on Fred’s face.

“Alright, gang.” Fred said, opening the door on his side of the Mystery Machine. “Let’s get to the bottom of this.”

“Fred, if you don’t mind, I’d like to stay on top.” Shaggy said, nervously.

“As much as it pains me to admit it, Shaggy’s right, Freddy.” Velma said. “It’s too dangerous. We’ll be spotted too easily.”

“Not if we use our old disguises from the mystery of the Irish Dock Creature.” Fred said, and he climbed out of the van, moving to the back of it, where he opened the doors and reached into a secret compartment that Elmo hadn’t noticed before. In the compartment was a cardboard box that had clothes that dock workers often wear; one of them was big enough for Elmo to fit in.

“I can’t believe you still have those old, raggedy things, Freddy.” Daphne said.

“I knew they’d come in handy one day, so that’s why I kept them.” Fred said, with a big smile on his face.

“They’re like a bad memory to me.” Velma said. “That mystery was the last one we worked with Scrappy-Doo on.”

“Who’s Scrappy-Doo?” Elmo asked, curiously, and Velma just smiled at Elmo.

“Someone you’re a lot better than, Elmo.” Velma said, while Fred was trying on the dock worker clothes, which fit him perfectly.

“Hey! It still fits!” Fred said, happily.

“It should.” Velma said. “It’s only been eight months since that mystery happened.”

“Well, it’s still good to see that my figure hasn’t changed all that much.” Fred said, and it wasn’t long before Daphne, Shaggy, Velma, and Elmo (and even Scooby-Doo) disguised ourselves as dock workers, wearing caps and covering our faces with specks of dirt to hide our identities. It really made Elmo feel like a spy.

Oscar: The only one time somebody gets all dirtied up and look good doin' it. Heh, heh.

Elmo and his disguised Mystery Inc. friends were about to head into the warehouse to find Dr. Crane, Mr. Falcone, and Detective Flass, until a man had mistaken us for one of them (our disguises were really good) and ordered us to help him out. Elmo and his friends knew that we had to keep our identities secret no matter what, so we decided to forget about Dr. Crane, Mr. Falcone, and Detective Flass and help out this man who looked even grouchier than Oscar.

Oscar: My kind of guy. Ha, ha.:grouchy:

“It’s probably better if we blended in with the thugs,” Velma whispered, “That way, we can see what these shipments are all about.” And before we started helping these men out around a maze of the stacked containers, which Elmo found out from this man were called “The Stacks,” we heard someone shout from a really dark area.

“Steiss? You okay, man?” The man asked his friend, just before he turned to Elmo and Mystery Inc. “You guys stay right here.” As Elmo and his friends did what the man said, Elmo noticed how he pulled out a gun and got a little scared.

Bert: Guns? Oh, no! They've got to get out of there! Something horrible might happen to them! Wh-What should they do?

Ernie: Uh, Bert...could you quiet down please? We're trying to focus on the story.

Bert:*frowns*


When the man moved towards the shadows, another man—who looked just as mean as the other did—came to tell him something, but he also noticed the gun in the man’s hands and pulled out his own. Now Elmo was really scared; but Elmo knew his Mystery Inc. friends would protect him. After they both moved into an open container, Fred quietly led us away from the stacks and towards the warehouse, and before we could go into it…

“AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!”

Elmo nearly had an accident, hearing the sound of that scream. Shaggy and Scooby begged for Fred to take everyone back to the Mystery Machine, but Fred was really curious about what was happening in the stacks. Four of these mean-looking men went into them, but none of them came out, and now Daphne and Velma were starting to become just as frightened as Scooby and Shaggy were.

“Freddy…why don’t we just call the police or something?” Daphne asked, politely.

“Something's going on here, Daph.” Fred said. “And I’m wanting to find out what it is.”

“Like, do you have some kind of death wish, man?” Shaggy yelled, just before we heard loud, banging noises that sounded just like fireworks. Now Elmo and his friends were all frightened, and we got even more scared, when we heard the door to the warehouse open. Elmo and his friends hid in the shadows, while Detective Flass and Mr. Falcone came out, holding guns that were bigger than the ones those two men were holding.

“What’s going on?” Mr. Falcone asked, angrily, before someone else screamed.

“I’m getting out of here!” Detective Flass yelled, and when he and Mr. Falcone disappeared, Elmo and Mystery Inc. came out from the shadows did the same. While Elmo was running scared with his friends, Elmo accidentally tripped and lost his dock worker cap. When Elmo tried to look all over for it, Elmo bumped into someone that had also been running.

“Excuse Elmo.” Elmo said, and looking up, Elmo noticed a scared Mr. Falcone looking down at Elmo.

“Who are you? Never mind!” Mr. Falcone said, quickly, and he grabbed Elmo by the arm and brought Elmo into the stacks with him. “I’m not going to let whatever it is in these stacks get me.” Mr. Falcone brought Elmo to a part of the stacks where we saw something that neither Elmo or Mr. Falcone had ever seen before. A giant bat fighting five men that had dangerous objects in their hands. Elmo not only had seen a giant bat before, but Elmo hadn’t seen anyone move really fast before. After the giant bat finished taking down the men, Mr. Falcone took his big gun and pointed it at the giant bat. “What in God’s name are you?”

The giant bat turned and looked at both Mr. Falcone and Elmo, just as he opened his hand and revealed two small, orange objects that he dropped to the ground. Looking at the scared look on Mr. Falcone’s face, as he looked at what the giant bat dropped to the ground, Elmo could tell that it might’ve had something to do with that big gun in his hands.

“You want to know who I am, Falcone?” The giant bat said, with a scary, dark voice. “I’m Batman.” Elmo took a step back, as the giant bat took his large wings and wrapped them around Mr. Falcone like a Christmas present. Before Elmo knew it, both the giant bat and Mr. Falcone were gone, and Elmo’s Mystery Inc. friends had arrived to find Elmo.

Oscar: Hehe! Now there's a real hero for ya...BATMAN!

“Elmo, why did you run off like that?” Fred asked, and before Elmo could explain, Fred interrupted Elmo. “Come on!” Elmo and his Mystery Inc. friends moved away from the stacks and went back into the Mystery Machine, driving away from the docks. As we drove away, Shaggy and Scooby looked more frightened than ever, looking at something out the window.

“Zoinks!” Shaggy yelled. “Like, what is that?” Fred stopped the Mystery Machine, long enough for everyone to get a good look at what Shaggy and Scooby saw. Up in the sky was a circle of light projected on the dark, scary clouds, with the shape of what Elmo and his Mystery Inc. friends thought was a bat in the center of it.

“Could there possibly be another meddling kid around here?” Daphne asked.

“I’m not sure if it’s even a kid who’s meddling.” Velma said, and when everyone noticed how she was looking at something other than the “bat light,” they followed her gaze to see a black flag blowing in the wind on a building nearby. But, at least to Elmo, it looked a lot more liked that giant bat that Elmo saw in the stacks.

“Let’s get out of here.” Fred said, before he drove the Mystery Machine away from the docks.


END OF CHAPTER TWO​

Bert: Um...m-maybe we should stop right here on the commentary. This story's getting really scary.

Oscar: Aw, c'mon! It's just startin' to get good. I ain't goin' anywhere and neither are you twerps. We agreed to do this, and we're going to stick around to the very end on it.

Count: Seven more vonderful chapters! Ah-ah-ah! *lightning strikes*:batty:

Ernie:*jumps at the lightning* Sometimes I wish the laws of physics didn't have to apply in fiction.
 

muppetwriter

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Chapter Three​

Bert: Hope this one is a lot nicer than the last one.:frown:

Six Weeks Earlier


You know that saying, “You are what you eat”? Well, I wonder if “You become what you fear the most” makes as much sense as that. Ever since I came back to Gotham, I felt like my company wasn’t wanted, even though several people had believed that I died during my exile from the city. I get that impression because I’m fighting for a family business with a man who promised it would be waiting for me when the time had come, right before he left the funeral for my murdered parents. But I didn’t just come back to regain what was rightfully mine; I came back because Gotham needed me…Gotham needed a symbol. What symbol, you ask? Well, let’s just say it should be something for the good to rally behind…and the criminals to fear.

Ernie: Uh...I don't think it's going to get any better, Bert, old buddy.:stick_out_tongue:

Bert:*sighs*


On my third day back in the old manor, I was visited by some old friends, as well as some new ones that they had made. Just when I thought that I left the life I’d lived through my exile behind, here came the four mini-monks and their pet dragon, standing at my doorstep with Count Dracula wannabe, a monster in a trash can, and a detective that I had first assumed was from Gotham (possibly hearing about my return and coming to investigate), but I was relieved when he had shown his Metropolis P.D. badge.

Count: Count Dracula wannabe? Hmm...that is one nasty insult.

Yet the Metropolis detective (who told me his name was “Thomas”—just like my father’s, except it was his first name) still came to investigate, hearing about my return through Omi, Kimiko, Clay, Raimundo, and Dojo.

“Yes, Detective.” I told him. “I did get trained by a group of men who had planned on destroying Gotham, with me as their leader. But I assure that the threat had been rectified, and the man responsible for my training, Ra’s Al Ghul, is now dead.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear that, Mr. Wayne.” Thomas remarked, not seeming to be much pleased, as he stared at me across from the kitchen table that both us and our friends were sitting at as we talked. “But what confuses me is why you decided to come back here, instead of moving on to another part of the world?”

“Well, like I told my friends, Detective,” I began, “Even though Ra’s plan sounded vile and deadly, there seemed to be a reasonable purpose in it. Gotham is decaying…it’s slowly dying…and someone needs to help it get better. I came back, because I’m going to resurrect what my father literally gave his life to build.”

Bert: Wow. He's a really inspirational guy, isn't he?

Oscar: Yeah...at least the side of him that doesn't wear a big, black bat costume.


“Bruce, I understand that the loss of your parents has been a memory that still haunts you to this very day and that guys like Joe Chill still wander these streets, killing the loved ones of others,” Thomas said, “But you have to know that Gotham has changed drastically over the years you’ve been away. Not even Superman can rebuild this city.” It was funny how Thomas mentioned the hero of Metropolis, because that was exactly what I imagined Gotham to have, only less of a boy scout. “I’m sorry to tell you that, but it’s the truth. With Carmine Falcone ruling this city, there isn’t a soul on Earth who can scare him out of that position.” My head shot up, and my eyes connected directly with the detective’s, when he uttered the word “scare.”

“What has been your greatest fear?” I asked, and Thomas looked at me rather oddly, and so did everyone else, as I turned and asked the same question again. “Anybody? What has your greatest fear always been?”

“Uh…” Kimiko stammered, seeming to be a little sheepish, “I’ve always been afraid of this doll that I’d accidentally broke a long time ago.”

“I’ve always been a little scared of my grandmother and her awful kisses.” Clay said.

“Even though I know they’re not real, alien jellyfish has always scared me.” Raimundo admitted.

“As much as it shames me to admit it, giant rabid squirrels are what I fear the most.” Omi said, looking rather sad as he admitted his fear.

Oscar: Boy, were those kids ever some wallflowers! I can think of a million things worse than all that.

Ernie: What are you afraid of, Bert?

Bert: I'd rather not say, Ernie. It's too personal.


Really big numbers.” Count von Count said, and for a while, we all stared at him awkwardly, trying to figure out what kind of fear was that (especially for a guy who loved counting). “What?” Forgetting about Count’s fear, we looked over at Oscar, who just glared at us and kept his mouth shut.

Ernie: So why didn't you say anything, Oscar?

Oscar: Because I didn't feel like it. Alright? It's only Slimy's and my own business of what I'm afraid of. Nobody else's.

Ernie: You're scared of being alone, right?

Oscar: Hey, twerp. You wanna take this outside? Or you wanna keep on commentatin'?

Ernie:*keeps silent*

Oscar: Besides, whatever I'm afraid of is way better than "really big numbers".

Count:*shivers*


“Well, maybe Oscar doesn’t have any fears, but I most definitely do.” Thomas said, and I listened curiously to him, as he explained. “During my twelfth year on the force, my sister, Lori, decided to become a police officer. I tried to talk her out of it, but she insisted on becoming one, because she looked up to her big brother and wanted to follow in his footsteps. So, she eventually became an officer and assisted me on a few assignments in following two years that she was on the force.” I noticed how the detective then started to get a little emotional, wiping both sides of his nose with his left thumb and index finger and then wiping his eyes to hold back tears. “There was…uh…one night when she…she helped me take down this perk at this chemical factory, and…Oh, god!” The detective was on the verge of a mental breakdown, and before he went on with his story, I stopped him.

“I…I get the message, detective.” I told him. “And I’m sorry.” The detective straighten himself long enough to look me directly in the eyes again.

Bert: Wow. Poor Sean. I can't imagine ever losing someone I love in that way.

“Don’t get me wrong, Mr. Wayne.” Thomas said. “I see your point clearly. But there’s just nothing anyone can do…no matter what city you’re in.” The detective might’ve been right on that; but Gotham was too different from other cities. It had fallen too far into darkness and plagued by crime more than any other city. However, that didn’t mean it couldn’t be saved from that darkness and cured by that illness known as crime.

“I want you all to come with me.” I said, as I stood up from the table. “There’s something that I want to show you all.” The detective and the others just gave me that same look, when I asked them what their fears were; but that curiosity in each of them was what got them up from the table and follow me to the backyard of Wayne Manor.

Ernie: Oh, boy. I really love this part.

I led them up to a well that hadn’t been used for a long time, until at least yesterday when I went excavating in it. “Any of you who are scared of bats may not want to come down here with me.”

I knew that I was scaring my guests straight from the way I was talking to them. But the way they just stood where they were, even after giving them serious caution, told me that they had a lot of courage in them. I gave them each some rope to help them climb down the well shaft and see what I had seen the other day. Once we were all the way down, we each undone the rope and turned to find a dark crevice between some rocks. We each crouched down, pushing into the blackness to crawl through into the caverns.

My friends and I climbed down a jagged rock crevice, with the air blowing in each of our faces. The crevice widened into a low-ceilinged chamber, and we all heard some water rushing, as we crouched and advanced through the chamber. When it turned downwards and got steeper, I help my friends slid carefully on their backs, as we lowered ourselves into limitless black. As we stood, the water had been roaring now.

Bert:*shivers*

Ernie: You okay, Bert? You look a little scared.

Bert: I'm fine, Ernie. I'm fine. *shivers some more*


“What’s this all about, Wayne?” Thomas asked, while panting his lungs out, and I only answered him by reaching into my coat and pulling out a chemical torch. I cracked it and threw the light into a vast cavern that had an underground river and a jagged ceiling.

“This is a waste of…” Oscar said, but before he could finish, bats exploded from the ceiling. Thousands had descended, screeching, obviously attracted to the light. Thomas, Omi, Kimiko, Clay, and Dojo instinctively crouched down, while Oscar’s upper body went right back into his trash can. The only ones who remained standing was myself and Count, who was counting the bats as they flew past him.

“Two bats…Four bats…Six bats…ONE THOUSAND BATS!” Count yelled, and he cackled gleefully, while I was profoundly calm amidst the cyclone of bats that were flying all around myself and my friends.

Bert:*screams*

Oscar: What the heck?

Ernie: Bert...if I didn't know any better...I'd say you're scared of bats.

Oscar: Huh? *laughs uncontrollably* He's scared of bats and still agrees to be in a story featurin' a guy who dresses like one.

Bert: It's not funny, Oscar! I consider that a huge phobia of mine!

Oscar: Ya can take pigeons, but ya can't handle bats? *chuckles*


“This is the symbol I will use to bring Gotham back to life, detective!” I exclaimed. “I will use my greatest fear to strike fear into those that have plagued our fair city!”

“So you’re gonna become some kind of ‘Bat Man’?” Thomas asked, and all I did was look over and grinned at him, as the bats began to fly away from us and to another part of the cavern.

---------------------

Alfred and I agreed that it would be nice if our guests stayed in the manor with us, while they were staying in Gotham. They were now a part of a secret that no one else outside the cavern (that I figured would make a great place to set up some kind of secret lair to keep up with Gotham’s activities) should know about. Count often hung around the caverns, counting all of the bats there to see if they would actually multiply one day. I was a little disappointed that he didn’t come with the rest of us, on the day I took my friends over to Wayne Tower, where I’d be settling some business. I knew there was some business happening there already, with Mr. Earle and Judge Phelan there for a board meeting.

Bert: Really, Count...how can you handle being near all those...things?

Count: Bats are the greatest friends to have. Ve flutter in the wind all night and count the stars. At least when it's not storming. Ah-ah-ah!

Bert:*shivers again*


“Morning.” I said to a young, beautiful assistant that was sitting at her desk, as I walked by with Detective Thomas, Omi, Kimiko, Raimundo, Clay, Dojo, and even the sloppy Oscar (who clearly stood out from the rest of us with that trash can of his).

Oscar: Yeah, I'm sloppy. What of it?

“Sir, you can’t go in there!” She exclaimed, and when I turned to her and smiled, she instantly recognized me and stood there, shocked.

“Yes, we can.” I said, just before I opened the door and noticed Mr. Earle, who seemed to be more annoyed than Oscar was at the time.

Oscar: These upper class, rich folk just don't understand the true joy of life: trash.

“You’ve got to be kiddin’!” The grouch yelled, sticking his head out of his trash can and looking around at Wayne Tower’s board room in disgust. “This upper section of this city looks too…nice! Yuck! Take me down to the lower part again!”

“I’m sorry, can I…?” Earle asked, and when he looked over to see me, he was totally dumbstruck, as were all of the other board members, who turned and stared directly at me. Now I seemed to be the one that stood out further than Oscar.

“Sorry to barge in, but my friends and I were in the areas.” Bruce said, and the room was silent for quite a while, as Mr. Earle got up from the board table and approached me, not taking his eyes off me for a second. He shook my hand and clapped the other on my shoulder.

“My boy!” He exclaimed. “We thought you were gone for good.”

“What can I say?” I asked, with a smile. “‘Reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated’.” There were some nervous chuckles, while Judge Phelan sat where he was, looking at me disbelievingly. “I hope no one minds if my friends join me here. They’re a few people that I’ve met during my ‘time off’.”

“Uh, sure. Not at problem.” Earle said. “But can I ask where you’ve been exactly?”

“You can ask…” I said, mischievously.

“Well, perhaps you’ll tell us your plans.” Earle said. “Are you back to finish college?”

“Actually, I thought I’d get to grips with what we actually do around here.” I replied. “From the ground up…one division at a time.” Earle was taking in what I said, nodding in the process.

“Any idea where you’d like to start?” He asked.

“Applied sciences caught my eye.” I said, and after I said that, I glanced over at Detective Thomas, who gave me a curious look.

“Mr. Fox’s department.” Earle uttered. “I’ll make a call. You can start today.”

“Actually, I’ve got a one o’clock tee-off, and it took me all morning to convince the club to honor my old membership.” I said, and as I grinned at Earle, I couldn’t believe how quickly I was starting to sound like my father. “Apparently, they don’t have to meet the same high standards as you when it comes to declaring someone dead.”

After the meeting, we hopped into the Rolls Royce and headed to the Applied Sciences Division, which was a massive warehouse that was stacked with crates that were oddly shaped under dust covers. There were several different types of lab equipment all around, and in the middle of it all was a black man in his early fifties named Lucius Fox, who led us through the stacks.

Bert: Wow. I bet that was a real fun place to visit. Kind of like an old museum.

Oscar: It was boring and I didn't have any fun at all.

Bert: When do you ever have any fun, Oscar?

Oscar:*frowns*


“Environmental applications, defense projects, consumer products…” He spoke in calm, knowledgeable tones, “All prototypes, none if production at any level whatsoever.”

“None?” I asked, and he paused for a moment, turning to look at me with a wicked gleam in his eye.

“What did they tell you this place was?” He asked, and before I could answer, Kimiko—for some reason—stepped in and answered for me. Come to think of it, I shouldn’t have been too surprised, seeing as how she had a history with such technological subjects.

“They didn’t say anything.” She said, and Fox just smiled at Kimiko, not seeming to be wondering why a young girl like her would be so interested in their discussion and instead returning his focus back on me.

“They told me exactly what it was when they sent me here,” Fox said, “A dead end where I couldn’t cause any more trouble for the rest of the board.”

“You were on the board?” Thomas asked, curiously.

“Back when Thomas Wayne ran things.” Fox replied, and I was a little impressed that he did know my father. “I helped him build his train, which was a beautiful project, routed right into Wayne Tower, along with the water and power utilities.”

“I’ve seen old pictures of that train, before it got a little decrepit through age.” Kimiko told Fox. “I think it’s really awesome how someone as great as you built such a cool mode of transportation.” Kimiko batted her beautiful blue eyes in front of Fox, making the old man blush a little, while Raimundo had muttered something under his breath that brought Kimiko to elbow him in the side.

“Ouch, girl!” Raimundo exclaimed. “That really hurt!”

“Well, next time speak up when you’re mocking me!” Kimiko yelled, with her angry voice echoing throughout the warehouse.

“Alright. That’s enough, kids.” Thomas said, forcing the two mini-monks to keep silent, much to Oscar’s displeasure.

“Aw, come on!” He said. “Don’t stop the bickering right when it was gettin’ good! These kiddies know kung-fu, remember? If they went further, they would’ve gone into one of those Shen Gong Showdowns…or whatever they call them.”

Ernie: What did he say?

Oscar: I think it was somewhere along the lines of "What a way to kiss up to an old geezer!"

Bert: Wow. That was pretty rude.

Oscar:*laughs* Yeah, I know. Wasn't it fun?


“Shut up, Oscar.” Thomas uttered, while Fox stopped at a tall crate. After checking the paperwork, he opened the crate and revealed a bodysuit, which was clear silicone over jointed armor.

“Here it is,” Fox said. “The nomex survival suit for advanced infantry. Kevlar bi-weave, reinforced joints…” As I felt the fabric of the suit, I wondered how protective it would’ve been for my body. If I was going to start helping Gotham get back on its feet by fighting the criminals that were bringing it down, I needed to know if I could do it without getting seriously injured (or even killed).

“Is it bullet-proof?” I asked Fox.

“Anything but a straight shot.” He replied, and with that notion rectified, I moved on with my next concern…

“Tear-resistant?” And Fox answered by hacking at the suit with a pen, leaving no marks whatsoever. Out of all of us, Omi was the most impressed with the suit.

“It is indeed more powerful than even the Two-Ton Tunic!” Omi exclaimed, and though Fox had not idea what he was talking about, he was happy that his model could even impress a small child.

“Why didn’t they put it into production?” I asked, which was a question that was more of the business of Wayne Enterprises than my personal business.

“The bean counters figured a soldier’s life wasn’t worth the 300 grand.” Fox replied.

“Pardon me sayin’ this, Mr. Fox,” Clay uttered, “But I reckon that money shouldn’t matter all that much, especially when it comes to savin’ the life of another stranger.” Fox admired Clay’s remark, but the more he glanced at Detective Thomas, Oscar the Grouch, and the monks-in-training, the more he began to get curious (which was exactly the way he looked at me just then).

“The question is…what do you want with it, Mr. Wayne?” Fox inquired, and I was prepared to answer a question like that, which was why I didn’t hesitate with a proper answer.

“I want to borrow it…for spelunking.” I said, which wasn’t far from the truth. Fox shrugged, putting the lid back on the crate.

“You get a lot of gunfire down in those caves?” Fox asked, and I was once again robbed of the opportunity to give a straight answer.

“Not unless those bats are packin’ heat!” Dojo said, and he quickly covered his own mouth, once he realized that he might’ve possibly exposed my secret plans. However, Fox didn’t suspect a thing, so Dojo was fine.

“Listen,” I told Fox, with a smile, “I’d rather Mr. Earle didn’t know about me borrowing…”

“Mr. Wayne,” Fox interjected, seeming to be one step ahead of me, “The way I see it…all this stuff is yours, anyway.”

“Chilly!” Omi yelled.

“That’s ‘cool’, Omi.” Raimundo said.

“It is, is it not?” Omi remarked, and Raimundo just sighed in exasperation.


END OF CHAPTER THREE​

Bert: Well, that chapter ended more pleasantly than the last one.

Oscar: It's horrible, isn't it?

Ernie: I'm excited to see what happens in the next chapter. Do you think we'll get any more bats, Bert? *snickers*

Bert: Ernie!

Count: That's six...six more vonderful chapters! Ah-ah-ah!
 

Hope Mills

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Ah, my son, what a gifted writer you are! What a fascinating storyline you have here. Keep up the good work!

Love Mama
 
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