Fully Engaged
“I’ve been trying and trying, but the nurse won’t talk to me,” Kermit was saying. Fozzie looked crestfallen, Piggy, mutinous, but Kermit could do nothing but continue to repeat what he’d been told. “They won’t release any information to me because we’re not related.”
“Can’t they get Gonzo to sign some forms?” said Rowlf. “I know if the patient fills out the forms they’ll talk to you.”
“Me mee meee me meep,” said Beaker irritably, and Bunsen Honeydew nodded in agreement.
“I agree, Beakie. This does make things more difficult.”
Kermit looked uncomfortable. “I—I think they’re trying to find a family member,” he said quietly. “I’m not sure what to…um, I don’t know what that means.”
“But—but we are his family,” Piggy said softly. A week ago, she would have denied knowing him at a tony eatery, but concern had caused even Piggy to drop her façade of disinterested distance. Camilla bawked softly, and Piggy put a comforting arm around her. “I know, Honey,” she murmured, hugging the brooding hen close.
Everyone was quiet.
“Forget this,” said Rizzo disgustedly. “Hey, Piggy—lemme borrow that big rock of yours.”
Piggy looked at him in confusion for a moment, then fingered BK* protectively.
“What for?”
Rizzo stepped forward and pierced her with a look. “For Gonzo,” he said defiantly. Piggy took the ring off and gave it to him.
Rizzo marched over to the nurses' desk and, although they couldn’t tell exactly what was happening, they saw Rizzo throw himself prostrate onto the u-shaped surface. Immediately, the little rat was surrounded by concerned nurses, all standing anxiously around as Rizzo sobbed realistically and pounded on the desk. Kermit was sure he heard, “But, but we were s’posed to get married next Spring,” before he turned his mind firmly away. Best not to know, he thought with a sigh. In an impressively short period of time, Rizzo was helped solicitously to dry his tears and was being escorted down to Gonzo’s room. Behind one of the nurse’s backs, Rizzo gave Kermit a big thumbs up, leaving the amazed amphibian to shake his head.
Leave it to Rizzo, he thought ruefully. Once the little rat made up his mind about something, it wasn’t much use to argue.
“Hey guys, I think Rizzo is going to get in. Maybe we’ll know something soon, hm?”
Gonzo was sitting up in bed. He looked…pale and shorn and a little stubbly where they had had to clip some of his fur for stitches, but the smile on his face was as undimmed as ever. Well, maybe a little dimmed, because Gonzo was obviously getting a lot of pain intervention through his IV. Rizzo fought the urge to flee and kept a death-grip on the mylar balloon in his hand.
“Hey, you ol’ weirdo, you,” he said. His voice sounded gruff and he tried hard to make it sound normal.
“Hey yourself,” said Gonzo. His eyes tried to focus on Rizzo, but slid off as though it was too much effort to hold the contact.
“What’s the Doc say? When they going to cut you loose?”
Gonzo roused a little, opening his eyes wider. The act seemed to cause him pain, for he winced.
“Didn’t say.”
“Hey—don’t hurt yourself,” cautioned Rizzo. The little rat tied the balloon to the end of the bed rail and hastened over. He took Gonzo’s hand, which was lying outside the sheet, and squeezed it. Gonzo didn’t squeeze back, and Rizzo felt a little thrill of nervousness run up his spine.
“Just…got a headache,” said Gonzo. “Doctor said something about a spinal headache.”
Rizzo digested this piece of information thoughtfully.
“They do a spinal tap?” he asked.
“Huh? Oh—yeah, something like that. Doctor said…” Gonzo trailed off, looking distracted, then his eyes swung back to focus on Rizzo again. “What’d you say, buddy?”
“Don’t worry about it,” said Rizzo gently. He squeezed Gonzo’s hand again, then reached up and patted his face. “I’m going to leave Mr. Happy Face balloon tied to the bed so you don’t feel lonely, but I’ll be back in to see you soon, okay?”
“Sure….” Gonzo said drowsily.
“Oh—and Gonzo?”
“Hmm?”
Rizzo flashed Piggy’s big ring at his friend. “If, um, anybody asks, we’re engaged—okay?”
Gonzo would have laughed, but he was too tired to manage. He smiled at Rizzo weakly.
“Sure,” he said wryly. “Take advantage of a guy when he’s down.”
“That’s what I’m here for!” said Rizzo with a laugh.
“Well, if we’re engaged, then I expect you to stop seeing other weirdos!” Gonzo insisted, then winced. Rizzo shrugged eloquently.
“Can’t help you there—I gotto go back to the boarding house. You rest. But I’ll come see you real soon.”
Gonzo didn’t respond. When Rizzo turned to look, he was fast asleep.
*BK is the name of the ring that Piggy is ALWAYS wearing—this is muppet canon—not my stuff. She named it that to remind her of life Before Kermit.