Chapter 25
"What did vous think of moi’s number, Kermie?" Miss Piggy asked sweetly as she came strolling backstage.
"Oh, Miss Piggy, my dear, it was no doubt one of the best performances you have ever given us on our humble stage," Kermit said.
"Aw," Piggy said. "That’s exactly what I was thinking." She pecked him on the cheek. "Moi has to go get changed for the closing number now, my sweet."
"As do I," Kermit said.
"Alas, we must part," Miss Piggy said.
"I’ll count the seconds until I see vous again," Kermit said.
"And that’s why you were on Sesame Street for so long," Piggy said. Kermit pecked her on the cheek, and she swept away to her dressing room, waving cutely down at him, and the frog waving cutely back.
He sighed happily and turned back towards his desk. It was then he realized that six eyes were staring at him.
"Man, are you gonna be like this all the time now?" Floyd asked.
"Si, because if jou are," Pepe said. "I may just start carrying a barf bag around with me, hokay?"
"Ya know, Kerm," Clifford said. "We’re never gonna let you hear the end of this."
"Trust me," Kermit said. "I know."
Clifford, Floyd, and Pepe laughed. "Hey, jou’re an engaged man now, Kermin," Pepe said.
"Yeah, green stuff," Floyd said. "No more cat-callin’!"
"I didn’t know you dated a cat!" Gonzo’s voice said.
"Gonzo?" Kermit asked, not seeing the weirdo. "Where are you?"
"Down here!" Gonzo’s voice called from under Kermit’s desk.
Kermit bent down and looked underneath his desk. "What are you doing down there?"
"I don’t know," Gonzo said.
"What?" Kermit asked.
"I was just trying to find a place to be alone with Camilla," Gonzo admitted.
"Camilla’s down there too?" Clifford asked.
"Yeah! We’re cozy!" Gonzo said.
"Why are all of d’ese relationships so very strange?" Pepe asked.
"Did you expect any less?" Kermit asked.
Pepe shrugged. "No, just t’inking out loud, hokay?"
"We get a lot of that around here," Kermit said.
Fozzie came darting of the stage, screaming. "Kermit!" he shouted. The bear
grabbed the frog and pulled him to his chest. "Kermit! They hate it! They want you!"
"They hate you’re act?" Kermit asked.
"Did jou expect any less?" Pepe asked.
Kermit scrunched up his face. "But they want me?"
"You and Piggy! Yeah!" Fozzie said.
"But, why?" Kermit asked.
"You’re two are like fire in a forest," Gonzo said, finally popping out from under the desk. "You’re hot!"
"Thanks," Kermit said. "I think."
"You better get out there, Kerm," Clifford said, glancing out at the reckless audience.
"But we’re not ready for the final number yet," Kermit said.
"Boss! Boss!" Scooter shouted, running in frantically. "There’s nothing on stage!"
Kermit panicked. "Gah- er- um, stall!" he said, running up to a dressing room.
Clifford, Fozzie, Gonzo, Pepe, and Scooter all looked at each other.
"Um, I’ve gotta get back to Camilla," Gonzo said, darting back under the table.
"I’ve gotta go find Skeeter," Clifford said, sneaking off.
"And, uh, band’s playin’ for the closing number," Floyd said, going the way of Clifford.
"Do jou have a womens to get to?" Pepe asked Fozzie.
"No," Fozzie said.
"And what about jou?" Pepe asked Scooter.
"Huh uh," Scooter said.
"Well d’en, men," Pepe said. "D’at leaves us to show d’is reckless crowd who is de boss, hokay?"
"Tony Danza?" Fozzie asked.
"No! Not Tony Danza!" Pepe shouted. "...Who’s Tony Danza?"
"Who cares?" Scooter asked. "We’ve got to go out there and stall! We can do the Simon Smith number, Foz!"
"No way," Fozzie said. "I’ve already been out there once, and risked my life, I’m not doing it again!"
"Fine then," Scooter said. "Pepe and I will do it."
"Do what?" Pepe asked.
"Just come on," Scooter said, dragging the prawn behind him. "Just follow my lead."
Fozzie tilted his head to the side. "Simon Smith and the Amazing Dancing Prawn?" he asked.
"Sounds great!" Gonzo said from under the desk.
<~><~><~><~><~>
"Don’t make this harder than it has to be."
"But- but why? Why now?"
"It won’t work between us, you know that."
"I just don’t understand."
"I’m sorry, but... but this is just how it has to be."
"There must be something I can do, something I can say!"
"There’s nothing, I’m sorry."
"Will I ever see you again?"
"I’m sure the wind will blow me back to you someday."
"When? When will I see you?"
"Keep your eye on the horizon, my sweet, and someday, I’ll return."
"Goodbye, Marge, my sweet," Sam Eagle said, his eyes locked with Aunt Marge’s.
"I’ll never forget you, Sammy," Aunt Marge said.
"You better go," Sam said. "If you hurry, you’ll be home in time to see Congress tonight on C-SPAN."
"But Congress isn’t meeting today," Aunt Marge said.
"I know," Sam said. "It’s unscripted today."
Aunt Marge bid farewell to Sam, and stepped on the train heading home to Leland.
"There goes one of the handsomest women I’ve ever met," Sam said to himself.
<~><~><~><~><~>
Link Hogthrob strolled on stage in front of the curtains and faced the audience. "Ladies and gentlemen," he said. "Miss Piggy and Kermit have asked me to introduce the final number, mostly because, well, they’re in it," Link said. "And uh, well, there’s one thing I’d like to say."
"Look, Statler, he’s sweating!" Waldorf said.
"I think maybe he’s on a frying pan!" Statler said.
"I don’t get it," Link said.
"Just introduce the number, meathead," Miss Piggy growled at Link from behind the curtain.
"But, I have to say something," Link said.
"Well just hurry up!" Piggy replied. "It’s dark back here."
"Um, well, okay," Link said. "Thank you for all the publicity."
"He’s hamming it up, Waldorf," Statler said.
"And we’re not even joking this time!" Waldorf said.
"Get on with it!" Piggy shouted.
"Um, ladies and gentlemen, Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy," Link said. "Which way do I go?" he asked. "Oh." He walked off stage quickly.
The spotlight opened on Miss Piggy in center stage. She was in a lavish white dress, sparkling at all angles in the spotlight.
"Especially for you," she sang. At the first lyric, the audience exploded with applause.
"I wanna let you know what I was going through
All the time we were apart I thought of you.
"You were in my heart
My love never changed
I still feel the same."
Another spotlight opened on Kermit on stage right, and the audience roared again. The frog began to walk towards Miss Piggy as he sang.
"Especially for you," he sang, his eyes focusing completely on Piggy.
"I wanna tell you I was feeling that way too
And if dreams were wings, you know
I would’ve flown to you
To be where you are."
"No matter how far," Piggy said.
"Now that I’m next to you-" they harmonized.
"No more dreaming about tomorrow
Forget the loneliness and the sorrow," Kermit sang.
"I’ve gotta say-" Piggy sang.
"It’s all because of you," they sang together, hands locked.
"And now we’re back together, together
I wanna show you, my heart is oh, so true
And all the love I have is especially for you," they sang together, their eyes stuck on each other.
"Especially for vous, Kermie," Piggy sang.
"I wanna tell you, vous mean all the world to me."
"How I’m certain that our love was meant to be," Kermit sang. "You changed my life," he said to her, not caring about anyone else.
"Showed me the way," Piggy sang.
"And now that I’m next to you."
"I’ve waited long enough to find you
I wanna put all the hurt behind you," Kermit sang.
"And I’ve gottabring out all the love inside you," Piggy sang.
"Oh, and now we’re back together, together
I wanna show you, my heart is oh, so true
And all the love I have is especially for you."
"Kermie, I’ve missed you so much," Piggy said, nearly in tears.
"I’d do anything for you Piggy," Kermit said. "Anything."
"You were in my heart
The love never changed," Piggy sang.
"So no more dreaming about tomorrow
Forget the loneliness and the sorrow."
"I’ve gotta say it’s all because of you," they both sang.
"Now we’re back together, together
I wanna show you, my heart is oh, so true
And all the love I have is especially for you."
The lovers repeated the chorus as a flood of Muppets swarmed the stage, singing the chorus as well.
"And all the love I have is especially for you," Miss Piggy and Kermit sang the final line, completely immersed in each other.
Kermit dipped Miss Piggy in his arms and kissed her in front of the entire audience, and everyone else. Again.
"I love you, Kermie," Miss Piggy said to her frog.
"I love you too, Miss Piggy," Kermit said. "More than anything."
Robin hopped up to the front of the stage next to his uncle. "We’ll see you all next time on The Muppet Show!"
The audience cheered louder than they had all night long, in fact, they were all out of their seats in appreciation for Kermit, Miss Piggy, and the Muppets.
"Thank you!" Kermit called. "Thank you all!"
"Kissy! Kissy!" Miss Piggy called.
"Hey, wait!" Gonzo shouted."
Everyone grew silent and all attention turned to the weirdo.
"So, when is the wedding, anyway?" Gonzo asked.
Kermit and Miss Piggy stared at each other. They both shrugged, and answered by kissing again.
"What does that mean?" Gonzo asked.
THE END
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Jim Henson Idea Man
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Sam and Friends Book
I did not know you potentially have more in store for us? Anyway, I loved these two last chapters. I especially loved the line "who's the boss" and the response "Tony Danza". That was really funny. Also liked the way things ended with Aunt Marge and Sam. It was cute and just right. So, if there is going to be another story to follow up this one, I say, bring it on!