Muppet College Dorms: The Next Semester

[Katzi428]

Prairie:Oh...come on everyone!We wanna sleep here!
Rosita: Si.... can't you do this in the daytime when all of us are awake?
raising my voice over the noiseMC Dorms have been brought to you by the letters P and Q ,which stand for Peace and Quiet which we need now and the number 8,for no special reason.Muppet Dorms are a production of Muppet Central.GOOD NIGHT!

 

[Beakerfan]

Bean and Sweetums enter

Sweetums: Who's there?

Bean: Nay, answer me. Stand and unfold yourself!

Sweetums: Long live the King!

Bean: Sweetums?

Sweetums: He.

Bean: You come most carefully upon your hour.

Sweetums: 'Tis now struck twelve. Get thee to bed, Bean.

Bean: For this relief much thanks. 'Tis bitter cold, and I am sick at heart.

Sweetums: Have you had quiet guard?

Bean: Not a mouse stirring.

Sweetums: Well, good night. If you do meet Animal and Floyd, the rivals of my watch, bid them make haste.

Floyd and Animal enter

Floyd: Holla! Sweetums!

Sweetums: Say, what, is Animal there?

Animal: *scratches his head* uhh.... piece......?

Sweetums: Welcome, Animal. Welcome, good Floyd.

Animal: Again?

Sweetums: I have seen nothing.

Floyd: Animal says it's nothing but our fantasy, and will not let belief take hold of him touching this dreaded sight twice seen of us. Therefore I have entreated him along with us to watch the minutes of this night, that if again this apparition come he may approve our eyes and speak to it.

Animal: *shakes head* NOT COMING.

Sweetums: Sit down awhile, and let us once again assail your ears, that are so fortified against our stoy, what we have two nights seen.

Animal: SIT! SPEAK!

Sweetums: Last night of all, when yond same star that's westward froooommm..... aw, c'mon Alex!

Alex: Guys, I can't have you doing this right now. I'm trying to do my homework! I NEED that copy of Hamlet! It's the only one I've got and we're supposed to have it read by tomorrow. I'll let y'all have it later, ok?

All the boys: Oooo-kaaaaay......

Janice: *clapping* Wow, like, that was RULLY good!

 

[The Count]

Heh... If you thought that was good, you should try it with MST3K quips peppered in between lines.

 

[BeakerSqueedom]

Bunsen:
Agreed, Katie.
Very beloved role indeed.

Claudia:
I'm wondering when she's going to move in.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Who?

Claudia:
Rabbit....
(Eyes water up with tears)
SHE PROMISED SHE'D HELP ME OUT WITH MY NAAAIILLSS!
(Sobs)

Dr. Van Neuter:
Wow, she's really going nuts!

Bunsen:
Mmmm...I'm in a mood for some now.

Beaker:
Meep!

Claudia:
(Wails louder)
And...AND...
I ATE the nuts!

Dr. Van Neuter:
Those were mine!
You know, you should ask before you decide to just eat them!

Claudia:
But they were too delicious!
(sobs)

Bunsen:
Wipe your eyes.
I'm sure she will come very soon.

Claudia:
(Sniffles)
No more nuts.
I now want a kit-kat! ;_;

Bunsen:
(Hands her one)

Claudia:
;_;
(Nibbles on it)

Dr. Van Neuter:
You owe me five bucks.

Claudia:
For what?

Dr. Van Neuter:
Those nuts were expensive!

Claudia:
Sorry.
(Hands him five bucks)

Dr. Van Neuter:
Thank you.

 

[The Count]

*Back home at Room #1... Okay guys... Got dinner here, some pieces of BBQ filet that I think best not mention what its source is for fear of other roomies bursting in, doused in garlic powder, and heated veggies like baby carrots and snap pea pods and bacon shaved asparagus. Iced tea to drink and some cookies for dessert. *Turns on television to tune in to some Monday night wrestling.
Sure hope to hear from Beth about Rabbit's application. Also waiting for the next segment of Sweeny Lefty.

 

[BeakerSqueedom]

Claudia:
His throat was bare beneath my hand!
(Cackles, clinging to the door frame)

Bunsen:
She's been reading his fanfic.
My dear, you shouldn't read that.
It spoils your mind...

Claudia:
It's been ruined long time ago, mate!
Besides, you've been casted for Pirelli!

Bunsen:
(Slightly offended)

Beaker:
(Laughs)

Bunsen:
I don't prance around in colorful outfits...
Do I?

Dr. Van Neuter:
Nah.

Bunsen:
Thank you, Phillip.
Really.

Beaker:
(Rushes to the library to read Sweeney Lefty)

Claudia:
(Follows after him)

Bunsen:
(Oblivious to Beaker leaving)
Time for your paycheck!

---

Beaker:
(Starts singing)

Claudia:
Pretty women!
Pretty women!
So delicate and fair!

Pretty women...


(Giggles pervade the air)

 

[redBoobergurl]

*calls Ed* Still waiting to hear from two more members on the status of Rabbit. Hope to hear soon. So far thumbs up.

 

[BEAR]

*Back home at Room #1... Okay guys... Got dinner here, some pieces of BBQ filet that I think best not mention what its source is for fear of other roomies bursting in, doused in garlic powder, and heated veggies like baby carrots and snap pea pods and bacon shaved asparagus.

(Some Muppet Vegetables appear over Ed's shoulder, crying and whining, as they watch the Dorm director devour their healthy relatives)

 

[MuppetGirl85]

Outside the Muppet College Dorms building, a taxicab pulls up to the curb; a twenty-ish girl with auburn hair and dark brown eyes gets out on one side, then walks up to the driver's side window.

Cabbie: *rolls down his window* Dat'll be fifty-five bucks, lady.

Christine: Sure thing! *reaches into her purse and pulls out her wallet; she opens it, removes some bills, then hands them to the cabbie*

Cabbie: *counts the bills, then looks at the girl* Yah ten bucks short, miss. Anytin' ya gonna do aboudit?

Christine: Ummm... *digs around frantically for more cash, then goes to the back and opens the door again* Placido? You have ten bucks on you?

Placido Flamingo: *sings in his tenor voice, to the tune of À deux cuartos! from "Carmen"*
No ten dollars! No ten dollars!
No ten dollars! No ten dollars!
No ten dollars! No ten dollars!
No money I have on me!

Christine: *rolls her eyes* Never mind. *turns to the other Muppets in the back* Jeanette, Nelson? Any money you can spare?

Jeanette: *sings to the tune of the famous "Indian Love Call from Rose Marie* We must admit to you-oooo-ooo-oooo, oo-oo-oooooo...

Nelson: Our dollars are only two-oooooo-oooo-ooooo, oo-oo-oooooo...

Cabbie: *getting impatient* Cahm-ahn, lady, I ain't got awl night!

Christine: *rubs her temples, then goes back to the driver's side window, takes out her credit card* I'm so sorry. Charge it to my card.

Cabbie: *practically snatches the card out of her hand and swipes it on the meter, then hands it back* Here's ya money back. *hands her the bills she had given earlier*

Christine: You know what... *puts the money back in his hand* keep it. For your trouble. *gives a slight smile*

Cabbie: Well, uhhhh...tanks...I guess. Ummm... *pockets the money* lemme pop da trunk for ya. *reaches down and lifts the lever to open the cab's trunk*

Christine: *goes around and grabs her luggage* Come on, guys, we don't want to keep the man waiting any more. *the three Muppets hop out and take their belongings as they are handed to them; once they finish taking out their things, she shuts the trunk and the cabbie drives off* So...this is home sweet home. *looks up at the building entrance*

Placido: Sí, sí! I am so happy to be reuniting with all of my old Sesame Street amigos! *the flamingo, dressed in an expensive suit, an overcoat, and wearing a white opera scarf around his neck, wipes a tear from his eye with his wing*

Christine: Well, gang...let's go inside and check into our dorm. I think we had signed up for #2, didn't we?

Nelson: Why, yes, we had. A Mountie never forgets a number, whether on a license plate or a dorm room entrance!

Jeanette: Oh, Nelson! You remember things so well! My hero! *leans her head on his shoulder*

Nelson: Oh, my love! *puts his free arm around the green female Muppet's waist*

Christine: *shakes head* Bring it inside. *smiles, because despite being with an operatic flamingo who will sing just to hear the sound of his voice, as well as a Mountie and his lady love who often got very sappy, she wouldn't have it any other way* Let's go. *she and her Muppet dormmates walk up the steps, open the front entrance door, and head into the lobby*

The four head step inside the building, finding themselves in the lobby of the residence hall.

Christine: Wow... *looks around* Nice lobby. *finds that, oddly, it seems deserted* Um...hello? Anyone here? *brings her rolling suitcase to a stop next to her, shifts one of her duffel bags on her shoulder, both fine pieces of luggage bought from the Dewey Crouton boutique store*

Placido: *sings* Helloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Echo: *comes back to them* Helloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Christine: *blinks* *clears her throat lightly* We're here, ah...it's Christine.

Placido: And Placidooooooooooo!

Nelson: And Nelson...

Jeanette: And Jeaneeeeeeeeette!

The four of them look around and wait for someone to help them.

 

[BeakerSqueedom]

Claudia:
(Rushes to welcome Christine)
Hello, ignore that weirdo taxi dude.
(Pounces)
HI! GREAT TO MEET YOU!

Beaker:
(Pries her off)
Mee mee mee.
Mee mee mee mee.

Claudia:
Hey, I'm not weird!
Oof!
(Dragged away)
WAIT! I HAVE TO SAY HI TO HER ROOMIES!
WAIT! LET GO!
(Is out of sight)

---

Bunsen:
Thank you, Beakie!
I'm so sorry you had to see that, Christine.
I'm sure Eddie will come running in to see that you all don't hurt yourselves.

This will be quite a doozie!