Breaking Back In

The Count

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Good stuff... Good to see the Muppets start being themselves again.

A small tip, there are parts where you end a sentence or a quote on a suspensive period, then leave a blank space. Since this kinda reads like either a sentence stopping or ellipsis, I'd eliminate the blank space in between and bring the next line of text up so it flows better.
Like I said, just a friendly tip.
 

Fragglemuppet

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Yes, I understand about Amber's room, (I do the same myself), but I don't understand why Amber's mother and the rest of the muppets would be there, as this seems to be the case. Does this make sense? Sorry I'm making your life harder, lol!
 

RedDragon

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Carrie is her Grandmother...she just happens to be in on it...get it?
 

Java

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Yes, Carrie is the Grandmother. I'm sorry I didn't make that clearer. The explanations as to how the muppets ended up in this situation is coming up in the next chapters but . . . the next chapter will have to wait until tomorrow. It was very busy in the unit today and I have had no time to write, which I'm going to do in just a few minutes, I just know that I won't be able to post it until tomorrow since I have company and still have to have dinner and . . .

Count, could you give me an example of what you mean? Sometimes I have a little difficulty with the grammar part of English. Then again, the rules have also changed since I last took an English class. (Take for instance the two space rule after a sentence apparantly no longer applies because of computers but I still put in the two spaces.) My sisters and I get into arguments about it sometimes.

Okay, off I go to finish commenting on the forums and then to write (and eat and sleep . . .)
 

The Count

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Well, there are some examples in this last post of yours.
Take for instance... The sentence at the end where you say you're gonna check on the forums and then eat and sleep.
You finished it leaving a space between what would be the last word "sleep" and the end period. Then, there's a space between that period and the other two that'd normally follow each other forming an ellipsis, followed by a right parenthesis.
When reading this, the two last periods spaced apart form what I read as a second sentence.

It's little things like that I'm refering to that need a bit of polishing. Other than that, the story's OK and I hope more gets posted... Soonish.
Oh, that's another thing you'll simply have to get used to here on MC. Whenever we find a fanfic that we rully like and devour, we end up "nagging" for more. It's turned into something of an MC thing, don't worry we do it to all the other writers all the time. Just keep posting and you'll healthily avoid it.
 

Fragglemuppet

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Funny, I don't seem to have that problem. Must be different versions of Jaws. To everyone else, that's the screen-reader that we use.
Ah, now I understand. Gee, now I'm embarassed. Here I'm expecting the author to give me an explination, and it turns out to be another reader who got it before I did...
 

Fragglemuppet

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I'm a bit out-dated I'm afraid Ed. I've got 4.5, but it works just fine for most of what I need it for. You?
 

The Count

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Got 7.0 working on my home computer, 4.5 on the one at my university's Law School's cubicles.

Oy, what I had to go through with this new computer and re-installing Jaws.
But look at us... Muffining Java's story.
Here, have a choc chip muffin Java, an offering to get more story posted soonish.
 
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