Chapter Twenty-One
Kermit stretched out on his bed that night and stared up at the ceiling.
She was getting better. She really, truly was. ...Wasn't she?
Of course she was. Her eyes were starting to sparkle more... She'd had
fun today, with the singing... hadn't she? Or, at the very least, she was remembering that
performing was something that
she did... and enjoyed... and… that was good.
He sighed, rolled onto his side, and slid his hand under his pillow, feeling the suede gloves...
She would be back to herself again soon... soon...
It was really just a matter of...
reminding her, wasn't it? She was already remembering... the songs, anyway...
Tomorrow, they would go to the theater, and she would remember more...
Getting her to the stage would be difficult, surely, but... but maybe, once she was there...
But only time would tell... Only time...
His fingers mingled with the fingers of the suede gloves beneath the pillow. She would get back to her old self... sooner or later... surely, she would...
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Have fun, guys!" Kermit called out as Muppets began flying off of the bus and into the theater the next morning.
Have fun.
The words were not traditionally part of the last-minute departing announcement when they arrived at the theater. It was usually something more like, "Try not to break that wall again!" or, "Meeting in the house in five!" or, "Don't forget to actually
practice, alright?" or, "Show tonight, guys!"
Usually, it was just sort of basically understood that they would have fun. The Muppets were, for the most part, a prime example of the idea that if you do something you enjoy, you will never work a day in your life.
But they weren't really here to
work today. They weren't actually starting the show back up for a few months yet, to match up with the DVD release of--
that movie.
No… Today's trip to the theater had a much different mission.
Namely... Miss Piggy.
They tried not to make that
too obvious, though. It was, after all, fairly usual for them to go to their beloved theater when they were
not working on the show, and the less obvious it was that this was for her, the more likely it was that it stood a chance of working.
Kermit put a hand on her arm to make sure that she
did, in fact, get off the bus and into the theater, but he was soon dragged away from her side. That had been planned. She needed to be more comfortable with
all of them, not just Kermit.
Kermit
hadn’t planned on how uncomfortable
he felt without being by her side.
Floyd laughed at him. "Green Stuff, she made it through the
jungle. She can survive us, too."
Kermit quickly turned his attention back to the bass player. "I-- I know that. What, uh-- what's that-- got to do, with, uh—um--"
Floyd laughed again. "Just the fact that that's the thirtieth time you've turned to check on her."
Kermit shrugged bashfully, squirmed, and cleared his throat. "Anyway, we were talking about, um, uh..."
Floyd laughed again and walked away, refusing to help the poor embarrassed frog.
Miss Piggy quietly lurked in the back of the audience, where most of the Muppets had congregated. She watched as they laughed and talked and made bets and eventually started taking turns to demonstrate various act ideas on the stage.
"Gee, Miss Piggy, I'm surprised you're way back here," Scooter said as he approached her.
She stiffened and shifted her weight, looking at him.
She realized that she was hoping he would take that as some sort of response, and keep going.
She realized that he was patiently watching her, waiting for a
real response.
She shifted her weight. "...Why's that?" she asked.
Scooter grinned broadly, overjoyed to hear her
speak to him. She hadn't been much for talking lately. "Oh, well, because Pepe is about to show Sam some 'wholesome entertainment' that he's thinking about performing for the show... and who wouldn't want a good seat for that?"
She hesitated and lightly bit her lip, processing this. Getting back into the mindset of
home took quite a bit of doing. Pepe could be quite the scandalous little king prawn. Sam the American Eagle was more stiff and rigid than a shirt that had too much starch. Pepe was showing Sam some 'wholesome entertainment' for the show. Scooter was waiting for her response to this.
...She smiled. "...Any- idea, what he'll do?"
"Who? Pepe, when he performs? Or Sam, when he sees it?"
"...Either," she said quietly.
"Well, Sam will probably faint," Scooter predicted. "No one knows about Pepe. Wanna see it?"
“…Yes,” she decided.
Scooter’s face lit up. “Great!” he said. “Come on, I’ve been saving you a seat right in front!” He darted down the nearest aisle with his usual over-enthusiastic efficiency.
Miss Piggy hesitantly followed, glancing down every row, to the left and right, for anything… wrong. Dangerous. She glanced at the ceiling, too, every few steps.
Scooter was waiting for her by the front row. He looked at the seats and the ceiling before he met her eyes. “See anything interesting?” he asked.
She froze and spun around, glancing at the seats and ceiling and aisle three times before she realized he’d been teasing. Feeling foolish, she slowly turned around and shook her head.
Scooter grinned at her—a harmless grin—and gestured to the center of the mostly full row. “Your seat’s this way,” he said, and he eagerly led her to it.
She gave the seat a hard, careful look before she slowly sat down between Gonzo and an empty seat that Scooter immediately filled.
“Piggy, do
you think Sam will like it?” Gonzo eagerly asked her.
She shifted her weight and shrugged.
“Gonzo, do
you know what Pepe’s gonna do?” Scooter asked.
“I was hoping
you would know,” Gonzo said. “But my money’s on him dancing a salsa in a kiddie-pool of watermelon Jell-O while singing the national anthem.”
“Man, we’re talkin’ ‘bout
Pepe, not
you!” Clifford said from the seat behind Miss Piggy.
“I know!” Gonzo said. “We’ve been having some
very insightful conversations lately. Especially with Animal.”
“IN-SIGHT-FUL!” Animal proclaimed from his seat next to Clifford. Miss Piggy flinched.
“Hmph,” Sam muttered, on the other side of Scooter. “He promised it would be
wholesome. I… have my doubts.”
“As you should, Sam,” Rowlf said, resting a paw on the back of the eagle’s seat. “As you should.”
“So where
is the shrimp already?” Clifford sighed, crossing his arms and his ankles as he sank back in his seat.
“He’s changing clothes,” Scooter said.
“He’s changing clothes just to show a
possible act to
Sam?” Rowlf said. “No offense, Sam.”
“Hmph.”
“Maybe he wants to make a good impression,” Scooter offered.
“Too late for that,” Rowlf said.
Pepe poked his head out from the wings. “Could h’I get a spotlight for dis?” he asked.
“Just show us the
act, Pepe,” Clifford said.
“ACT! ACT!”
Miss Piggy flinched.
“What h’about musical h’accompaniment, h’okay?”
“PEPE!” whined the scattered, half-attentive audience. Miss Piggy flinched.
“Si, h’I will begin.” Pepe crossed to center stage, sharply dressed in a suit and tie. He cleared his throat and began to speak in a most dramatic voice.
“Sing h’in me, muse, h’and t’rough me tell de story
h’of dat man skilled in h’all ways h’of contending,
de wanderer, harried for jears on h’end,
h’after he plundered de stronghold
h’on de proud height of Troy, hokay!”
“Ohhh boy,” Clifford sighed, dumping his head against the backrest.
“Four score h’and seven jears ago,
Little Miss Muffet
Sat on her tuffet.
It was de best h’of times,
It was de worst h’of times.”
Rowlf clamped a paw on his mouth and silently chuckled.
“Red h’is gray h’and jellow, white!
But we decide which is right,
H’and which h’is h’an illusion, h’okay!
Brave Helius, lift up jour h’orb!”
Scooter leaned over to Miss Piggy. “Do
you know what he’s trying to recite?” he whispered. She shifted her weight and shook her head.
“Oh, for a kiss from jour lips,
for jour love h’is sweeter than wine!
Jou are fair, my beloved, jou are fair.
Jour eyes h’are doves, hokay.
I look to de hills!
From whence comes my help?”
“I
run to the hills,” Clifford muttered under his breath.
“Two paths diverged in de woods, hokay,
H’and h’I, h’I took de road less traveled,
H’and dat has made all de difference.
Quothe de raven,
NEVERMORE!”
Pepe threw out his arms and dramatically bowed.
They sat in silence for one long, utterly stunned moment.
Sam stood up and began to applaud. “Bravo! Bravo! That was
remarkable!”
The Muppets glanced at each other in something akin to utter confusion while Pepe graciously bowed again and again.
“That was
excellent!” Sam went on as he rushed onto the stage and stood beside the king prawn. “I must admit, that when you proposed some
wholesome entertainment, I was…
skeptical. But—“ He put a wing on Pepe’s shoulder. “That was the
best recitation of Thoreau’s
Walden that I have heard in
years!”
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