2007 Muppet Presidential Election begins

[The Count]

*Begins drumming up support for Miss Piggy and Catherine. What? She hasn't yet made her acceptance speech? Details, don't bother me with details.
*Starts mass publishing of her epic fanfics to disseminate amongst the public to get their votes. *Calls up Kermit to warn him he'd better get in line with the pig's campaign or suffer serious bodily harm.

 

[theprawncracker]

Grover: Well, it is good to know I have supporters.
Elmo: Elmo supports Grover! GOOOOO GROVER!!
Grover: Well, it is good to know I have the vote of the obnoxiously cute three year old voters.

 

[The Count]

Yeah... Except for the fact they can't vote... *Hands out Piggy pins from the box next to his clipboard. Huh? Oh hi, the name's Scooter. Miss Piggy hired me as her assistant, but she'll make her grand entrance later... As usual.

 

[theprawncracker]

Grover: *looks at camera* Go-fers are such a mean little animal, are they not?

 

[Luke]

Bunsen: Here at Muppet Labs our policy on Mud slinging is to get dirty. Therefore we do not wish to draw the voters attention to the fact that Miss Piggy's "Moi" fragrance smells awfully like Calvin Klein, and could well be a cheap knock off. We will also not be be revealing the fact that Miss Piggy is really a man at this stage in the campaign, although we have obtained some very interesting photos involving feather boas.

As for Grover, he represents Elmo, and he has multiple personalities. Nuff said!

 

[theprawncracker]

Grover: Oh, there is mud-slinging? That is filty. I am not sure my mommy would condone me getting my cute little business suit messy.

 

[Beakerfan]

Beaker: Oh! Uh, mudslinging? *steps in something* What's this? *throws fistfull of mud at Bunsen*

 

[The Count]

Scooter: It should be noted that Dr. Honeydew's statements are those of a discredited crackpot scientist and should not be taken at face value. Furthermore, the photographs he alledges to have have been doctored to show the outcome he wishes to prove. Miss Piggy will arrive, at her own fashionable moment and address these allegations after issueing forth her acceptance speech.

 

[Luke]

Bunsen: Re-purchased from Ebay (account Notashrimp) i have here the mind numbing Rubber Duckie as featured in Muppets From Space. I think it will come in useful later on in the campaign.

In other news, i would like to make some more policy announcements. If elected, i will have the Muppet congress grant Sababa Toys a special license to make a Mokey Plush which will be specially discounted for all Muppet Central members (who vote for me). I am also considering sending Elmo into space (one way ticket) as he's annoying, though i'm not sure yet how popular this decision would be so will be holding discussions on this matter and may possibly send Andy & Randy pig instead.

 

[Beauregard]

"Hello again and welcome to the wiiiiild world of Muppet Sports. Here at Muppet Central, potential presidential candidates are gathering with a will. There's mud flying, dirt being shifted through, and...I think I heard something about "Elmo Goes To Space" a new straight-to-dvd release in which Elmo, bless his heart, saves the entire universe by revealing the inner cute to a race of savage monsters...right before the monsters are shot down by airplanes and beauty kills the beast. That's all for today from the wild world of Muppet Sport."