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Father: ...right, that's it. We're moving. Fem, leave a note on the door for the others. You can write, right? Dandan, Peapea, come with me. Drue...do something. *strides down yellow brick road* *pauses* *turns around and strides the other way*

Father: It's a soap...there is nothing conclusive about soap...*to self* Is it liquid? Is it solid? Why does it jump from your hand into the bath and hide under the bubbles? *pause* Wrong soap.

Father: *looks at watch* Gee, time flies when you're having...ears near women talking...Ok, seriously...do you think we need to follow the storyline and let it pan out to figure what we're doing in Crazy Town? Or shall we just head back into the house and have a cup of tea and a biccy?

Father: You're going to consult Mr Cole about this?

Father: A KFC? *leans to look in the windows* There are some seriously small chicken drumsticks in this world...*to Dan* Oh that's nice. *pats him on the head* Miss...Ms? Mrs Barina...what is this Cillit Bang of which you speak so highly?

Father: *gathers self together and stands* Alright...here's the facts...as I know them...*ahem* We've been hurled into the land of Oz by a whirlwind...*pauses* That's about it. Did any of you people read that book in junior high? ...did any of you go to junior high?

Father: *sits up* *sees Barina Scott* *faints again* Ouch...these rocks are not soft to the underside of the head area...

Father: Australia? That explains the headrush and the inflated blood vessels in my brain...So, we're in Auz...yellow brick road...you know...Wait, OZ? *faints*

Father: Yeah, well...the insurance may not cover the house, but the house sure covers the upper half of that woman with the really nice shoes. Is there any chance she isn't dead, because I don't know how manslaughter looks when the weapon was a front porch.

Father: *stares* Oh no...oh this is not good...oh there's a woman underneith my...HOUSE! My house has crashed on a woman in a field! This isn't a good day, right?

Father: Nice pigtails...*gets up, dusting trousers and walks towards a long road made of yellow bricks* How are we ever going to figure out where the heck we are without a GPS system and an innate sense of direction? *steps onto the road* I mean we could follow this yellow brick road for miles...

He's blue, has an orange nose, playing a harmonica and has a hat pulled right down to his eyes.

Father: *slaps into a muddy farmers field* Well, that was...unexpected. *spits mud* And that was just gross. And...we're not in Kansas anymore, Toto. Actually, we were never in Kansas in the first place so technically, we're still not in Kansas, Toto.

Father: Whoah...no...um, no. No...I can't...twist...my back, is not fit for twisting. No twister. Thanks. But no.

*stares* *stares* *stares* *blinks* *stares* Wow...WOW...wow...I'll try and formulate some more words together at a later point. *shakes head* *wow...*

Oooh! Neat! I loved Cantus there...boy I MISS that Fraggline Freak! Hey, who was the blue guy at the back? Nice meshing of pictures together. They all fitted really well there.

Father: Weeeell, it's either my daughter or a shoe with really cute eyes...which would probably make Fem happy, but other than that...yes, it's my baby which I havn't seen since the 23rd of November when I discovered the fireworks had been used as chew toys...

Father: If that's Fem, yes you can. If it's a second head, gosh you freak get OUT of my kitchen!

Father: Er...Mr Stalk...dispite your attempt at an authentic stalk impression, would you mind putting your legs away please?

Father: I suppose Little Gem is also out of the question? Yeah...who would name their boy "Little"?