MissMusical12's Muppet Show Outlines

[MissMusical12]

I love all of these outlines! Just picturing this version of Cell Block Tango makes me laugh!

Definitely. If you're interested, here's the original version of the song:

 

[MissMusical12]

Here's a request from Piggy the Frog! Enjoy!
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GUEST STAR: Tim Curry
STYLE: Season 5

COLD OPENING:
Pops is feeding a parrot nearby.

Parrot: Squawk! Squawk!

Enter Tim Curry.

Pops: Oh, who are you?

Tim: I'm Tim Curry, your guest star on The Muppet Show tonight.

Parrot: Squawk! I'm Tim Curry, your guest star on The Muppet Show tonight.

Tim: No, I'm Tim Curry!

Parrot: No, I'm Tim Curry!

Tim: Hmmm. I'm a complete idiot.

Parrot: Squawk! You're a complete idiot! You're complete idiot!

Pops: -to parrot- Hey, he's not a complete idiot!

Tim: Of course not. -to camera- I'm a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual Transylvannia.

Pops: Really?

Tim: No.

THEME SONG
TRUMPET GAG: Gonzo gets struck by lightning before he plays his trumpet.

INTRODUCTION:

Kermit: Thank you, thank you and welcome again to The Muppet Show! And boy do we have a treat for you tonight!

Statler: The show's finally been cancelled?

Kermit: Uhhh No. Our guest star tonight is that talented star of stage, television and film, including "The Rocky Horror Picture Show", Mr. Tim Curry!

Audience: Ooooooh!

Kermit: Yes! But first, let us go back in time to the Medieval Ages. The era of knights and princesses and dragons and jesters and all that stuff..............

MUSICAL NUMBER: I Got You (I Feel Good), sung by a whatnot knight trying to save his "princess." He tries to run away once he finds out his princess is really Miss Piggy. She then karate chops the knight to a dragon's mouth.

BALCONY:

Waldorf: Well, how do you feel about that number?

Statler: I feel sick to my stomach just watching it!

Both: Dohohohoho!

BACKSTAGE:

Kermit: Piggy, is he gonna be alright?

Miss Piggy: Who, mon capitan?

Kermit: That guy you just karate chopped into that dragon's mouth.

Miss Piggy:...........Oh, he'll be fine. -goes off-

Gonzo: -comes in looking a little like Dr Frank 'n' Furter (watch Rocky Horror)- Hey, Kermit!

Kermit: -gasp- Gonzo, what in the world are you wearing!?!?!

Gonzo: What am I wearing? -starts singing- Well, I'm just a sweet, tra.....

Kermit: No! It doesn't work that way!

Gonzo: So, how DOES it work?

Kermit: How should I know? Ask Tim Curry.

Tim: -coming out of dressing room- Yes, Kermit?

Kermit: And speaking of him, here's Tim Curry! Yaaaaaay!

Tim: Kermit, did someone need me for anything?

Gonzo: Yeah! How does this work? -starts dancing around-

Tim: Well, for starters, it doesn't go THAT way, Gonzo.

Gonzo: Then which way does it go?

Tim: -starts walking around, fancy- This way!

Gonzo: Oh that way! -starts walking around, fancy- Like this?

Tim: Yes! You got it!

Floyd: -passing by- Why's everyone tryin' to steal my walk? Mmmmm. -goes off-

Kermit: Hey, Tim, you better head onstage for your first sketch.

Tim: Oh! Thank you, Kermit! -goes onstage-

Gonzo: Hey! Where you going? You still have to teach me how to talk the talk!

INTRODUCTION:

Kermit: P.T. Barnum is one of the most celebrated showmen of all time, starting up the world famous "Barnum and Bailey Circus." And now, with us tonight as Mr. Barnum, joined by some of our other fun loving circus folk, is our guest star, Mr. Tim Curry! Yaaaaaaay!

SKETCH: Tim, as P.T. Barnum, introduces a three-ring circus. One ring with the oldest woman alive, second with a group of clowns, and third with an acrobatic team.

BALCONY:

Statler: There's a sucker born every minute, alright.

Waldorf: Unfortunately, we are two of those suckers....for seeing this show!

Both: Dohohohhoho!

NEWSFLASH:
Newsman: Here's a Muppet News Flash! "Popcorn is now becoming a popular snack to eat at operas. It not only lets the viewer enjoy popcorn at an opera, but also helps the performer onstage to keep in time to the chewing of the viewer. In fact there was even an avalanche of popcorn the other night at the Metropolitan Opera House!"

Popcorn then comes down from the sky onto of the Newsman.

Newsman: -eats one of the popcorn, but then spits it out- Bleh! No one told me this popcorn was stale!

Beauregard: -comes on- The popcorn was stale!

Newsman: Now you tell me!

UK SKETCH: MUSICAL NUMBER: I'd Really Love To See You Tonight, performed by Floyd and Janice, accompanied by Animal and Rowlf (similar setting to 50 Ways To Leave Your Lover )

BACKSTAGE (Tim's Dressing Room):

Tim is checking something in the mirror, when there's a knock on the door.

Tim: Come in.

Gonzo enters, still dressed in his Frank 'n' Furter outfit.

Gonzo: Hey, Tim!

Tim: Gonzo, I'm surprised you still have that outfit on.

Gonzo: Well, somebody's gotta do it!

Tim: And it sure isn't me.

Gonzo: Listen, does this sound any better?

Tim: Sound any.....

Gonzo: Yeah! I'm trying to talk like Frank 'n' Furter.

Tim: Gonzo.....

Gonzo: -starts to sing- Well I'm just a sweet tra.....

Tim: No! No! Gonzo, it doesn't work that way!

Gonzo: Then how DOES it work?

Tim: How should I know? Ask Ti......Oh wait. I am Tim Curry.

Gonzo: So how does it work?

Tim: This running gag isn't going to end anytime soon, I believe.

VET'S HOSPITAL: The Knight from the opening number is in Vet's Hospital. After a comment from the knight, Nurse Piggy karate chops him again, thus knocking him out.

BALCONY:

Waldorf: What night is it?

Statler: Tuesday?

Waldorf:......I think we just missed bingo night.

Statler: Well then next Tuesday, we'll go to bingo night instead of this show!

Both: Dohohohohoho!

BACKSTAGE:

Miss Piggy then storms off into her dressing room.

Kermit: Did Piggy karate chop him again, Rowlf?

Rowlf: Yup. She sent him back to Dark Ages. -laughs, along with Janice, and then the two go off-

Gonzo then enters, not wearing his Frank 'n' Furter outfit anymore.

Kermit: Gonzo, what happened to being Tim Curry's next Rocky Horror groupie?

Gonzo: Mehhhhhh I couldn't hack it. Tim said I was doing everything wrong.

Kermit: Don't you always?

Gonzo: Do what?

Kermit: Never mind.

Gonzo: Listen, I've changed now. I'm not interested in trying to be the Sweet Tra........

Kermit: No.

Gonzo: But to my point, I've now decided to become something else. -rushes off, but then rushes back on with a stunt suit on- Evel Knievel! Hahahahaha!

Kermit: Gonzo, you've always been doing stunts.

Gonzo: Yeah, but my first name isn't Evel.

Kermit: Yeesh. -goes onstage-

INTRODUCTION:

Kermit: And now to close tonight's show, with a sweet little number to send you home with, our guest star, Mr. Tim Curry!

MUSICAL NUMBER: I'm Going Home (from The Rocky Horror (Picture) Show), performed by Tim, accompanied by The Electric Mayhem, backed up by The Female Singers.

GOODNIGHTS:

Kermit: Well folks, another night, another show done....for now. But before we go, let us thank our guest star, ladies and gentlemen Mr. Tim Curry! Yaaaaaaaay!

Tim: Thank you so much, Kermit. You know I've actually learned a lot tonight.

Kermit: Like what, Tim?

Tim: For starters, don't sing "Sweet Transvestite" where the public can see you clearly looking like a moron.....

Gonzo: -comes on, back with his Frank 'n' Furter outfit on- Well I'm just a sweet, tra.........

Kermit and Tim: No! Please! No!

Kermit: Uhhh, we'll see you next time on The Muppet Show!

(Goodnights: Kermit, Gonzo, The Female Singers, Rowlf, Miss Piggy, and a few clowns from the Circus Sketch)

CLOSING THEME

BALCONY:

Statler: So what do we do now?

Waldorf: Well....I'm going home.

Statler: Where the skies are blue?

Waldorf: No, where my bed is!

Both: Dohohohohoho!

END
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Phew! This was a doozy! I hope you enjoyed it, Piggy The Frog. And I hope the rest of you did, too! More outlines, coming soon!

 

[Piggy The Frog]

Thank you so much, that was hilarious! I love the mental image of Gonzo as Frank.

How should I know? Ask Tim Curry.

Good answer for anything.

 

[MissMusical12]

Thank you so much, that was hilarious! I love the mental image of Gonzo as Frank.

You're welcome! I kinda think Gonzo would be a terrific Frank, either way. I thought it'd be a perfect plot, since Tim was only best known for that role at the time.

 

[Piggy The Frog]

I don't know if this was intentional, but I noticed a bit of foreshadowing. First, you have Tim interacting with a parrot. Of course, he goes on to play Long John Silver in MTI (with a lobster instead of a parrot, I know, but still). Then the P.T. Barnum sketch with the clowns (IT).

 

[MissMusical12]

I don't know if this was intentional, but I noticed a bit of foreshadowing. First, you have Tim interacting with a parrot. Of course, he goes on to play Long John Silver in MTI (with a lobster instead of a parrot, I know, but still). Then the P.T. Barnum sketch with the clowns (IT).

I was aware of the foreshadowing of MTI with the parrot. However I actually really wasn't aware of the clowns in the P.T. Barnum sketch foreshadowing "It" until you told me. Thanks.

 

[Piggy The Frog]

I was aware of the foreshadowing of MTI with the parrot. However I actually really wasn't aware of the clowns in the P.T. Barnum sketch foreshadowing "It" until you told me. Thanks.

They probably weren't evil clowns then.

 

[MissMusical12]

They probably weren't evil clowns then.

Nope. Definitely not evil clowns. Just perfectly normal Muppet clowns.

 

[LipsGF4Life]

The two stories were AMAZIN'!

 

[Piggy The Frog]

Nope. Definitely not evil clowns. Just perfectly normal Muppet clowns.

Perfectly normal? On The Muppet Show?