The Worst CGI Kid Films In Recent Memory

[Drtooth]

Wait... THAT'S their excuse? A Mario cartoon, comic book, well done CGI animated movie is a license to print money. There's more than enough Nintendo fanboys in the industry of each to give us a quality, official Nintendo continuity friendly project. I thought they were just burnt out by the American media being unsatisfactory. At the very least, they need a comic book with a continuous story. The Mega Man comics prove it can be done and done right.

Still, Wario needs something. He's an amazing character that's so much more than Mario's evil twin thing. A Wario Ware based series would be amazing, be it a comic or a cartoon.

 

[AquaGGR]

We're not sure if that actually is, but it seems like it given how little Mario talks and our lack of Mario animation. Since Nintendo characters are known for being silent.

I wouldn't be surprised if that actually is why Nintendo doesn't make a Mario show, look at Hotel Mario.

 

[Drtooth]

Hotel Mario was nothing more than cutscenes. A quality Super Mario show (or comic book) can be done.

I guess Nintendo wants 100% control over everything they own. No wonder why they're losing money to systems that favor similar FPS games. They need a bigger media presence. I liked Mario more for the cartoons than video games when I was younger. It's a nice way to hook younger players.

 

[Drtooth]

That stupid Space film we were talking about earlier...

STILL no word on it on the internet, except for its own page.

WOW! Even Oogieloves had buzz for sucking. I doubt it would even be filler at a RedBox at this point.

 

[mr3urious]

I actually tried out the Flash games on the site out of curiosity. They're very uninspired and amateurish, and I've seen Flash and even Java games from 2001 look better than this.

http://www.lastflightofthechampion.com/helpneddie.htm

Find your teammates in a maze and take them to the ship while avoiding the Shocktroopers. The maze is way too big, and the troopers just wander aimlessly back and forth. Plus, one hit and you start all over.

http://www.lastflightofthechampion.com/ottogame.htm

A pathetically easy puzzle game in which you launch the German stereotype pig to help him eat some cookies.

 

[Drtooth]

Someone on Cartoon Brew actually saw this... I'm posting his review.

I went and saw this. It is HORRIBLE. The trailer makes it look considerably better than it actually is! Nearly all the scenes they spent any money on are in it.
The wretched quality of the animation is the least of its problems. They clearly put no thought whatsoever into having the plot make at least a modicum of sense. The script is plodding and talky, the characters are all annoying and devoid of personality, the suspense is nonexistent, the voice-acting is wretched (especially the accents), the space battles are an indecipherable blur of spaceships and lasers twirling around, the ending is a total cop-out ... heck, there is NOTHING good about this movie.
Unfortunately (?) I haven't seen "Foodfight", so I can't use that as a reference, but I can say that "Last Flight" is slightly better than "The Lion of Judah" and considerably worse than "Silver Circle", if that helps any.
It is not a Star Wars ripoff, BTW. That's just a brief portion of the movie that's overrepresented in the trailer. Its really more of the Turbo/Planes "You can do anything if you set your mind to it regardless of how fundamentally unqualified you are" thing. Only taken to an absurd extreme, since most of the "crew" is so mentally disabled (literally!) that you feel uncomfortable that they're even out in public unsupervised, let alone on a spaceship battling planet-enslaving armadas.
It's kind of a weird meta-level parallel with the movie itself, actually.
The running pig scene (seen at 1:57 in the trailer) lasts a good 30 or 40 seconds, which tells you about all you need to know.
I agree in principle that it's a good thing when independent artists are able to see a product all the way through to a theatrical release, and support it with a nice website. But when I see something like this movie, I'm also forced to conclude that some people just should not be making movies, in EXACTLY the same way that snails should not be racing at Indy. Whatever time or resources they put into this thing was utterly, tragically wasted.

He then adds....

Update: I saw Foodfight.
Foodfight, which is certainly atrocious, is MUCH better than The Last Flight of the Champion. In every possible respect.
In fact, if you think Foodfight is the worst thing you've ever seen, you NEED to see this movie (or The Lion of Judah) and get some perspective!

Why the heck isn't this the laughing stock of the internet? I don't care if it only opened up in 15 theaters. This needs all the scorn it should get.

Edit... Seeing the trailer again for reference... anyone else wanna kill that friggin' rabbit?

 

[mr3urious]

I know it's not a wide release, but this thing made almost $15,000 on its opening weekend!

 

[D'Snowth]

All this talk about bad movies and everything, that SHARKNADO is apparently more groundbreaking than any of us could ever imagine... you know what the NEXT big blockbuster disaster epic is getting ready to be (and this one apparently is going to theaters)? SQUIRRELS. Yep. Killer squirrels. It almost looks like a movie that Hitchcock thought about for two seconds and decided, "Nah..."

 

[mr3urious]

you know what the NEXT big blockbuster disaster epic is getting ready to be (and this one apparently is going to theaters)? SQUIRRELS. Yep. Killer squirrels. It almost looks like a movie that Hitchcock thought about for two seconds and decided, "Nah..."

Already I'm reminded of that Arthur episode where the kids starting gaining an irrational fear of squirrels.

 

[Twisted Tails]

Already I'm reminded of that Arthur episode where the kids starting gaining an irrational fear of squirrels.

Oh yeah! I seen that episode. I wonder why that episode remind me of the Hitchock film, The Birds. *shudders*