The Muppets present Top 50 Muppet Moments

[minor muppetz]

Be prepared for the start of a new fan fiction, The Muppets present The Top 50 Muppet Moments. I will start soon.

 

[minor muppetz]

Part 1

(The title appears on-screen as we see a room full of Muppets, I'll list who all is there after I finish. The screen scrolls around simialr to the beginning of The Muppets: A Celebration of Thirty Years)
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, here are the Muppets who, in honor of their 50th anniversary, are going to present the top 50 muppet moments countdown! And now, here is Kermit The frog!
(the crowd cheers)
Kermit: Thank you, thank you, thank you. You know, I am 50 years old....
(cut to a balcony that statler and waldorf are at)
Statler: You've got ways to go to catch up with us, frog.
(statler and waldorf laugh)
Kermit: Anyway, in honor of my 50th birthday, I am going to present the top 50 muppet moments ever, chosen by a staff of main characters. Anyway, we'll start off at number fifty...
Pepe: Wait! You mean we won't start with the best, okay?
Kermit: Well, Pepe, we are starting at the worst and making way to the best.
Waldorf: Ha! The number one spot is probably the worst anyway.
kermit: You shut up! Anyway, here is number fifty......
(this leads to the celebration song from Muppets from Space)
Statler: You know, Waldorf, that number makes me want to do something.
Waldorf: Does it make you want to celebrate?
Statler: No, it makes me want to leave.
(they laugh)
Miss Piggy: Well, it is now moi's turn to introduce some clips. Here are clips 49 and 48. Moi is both honored and shocked at both of these choices. Honored, because vous gets to see her great moments so early in the show, and shocked because....
Crazy Harry: (popping up) Did somebody say shocked?
Miss Piggy: No!
(crazy harry presses down on a lever and electrocutes Piggy)
Miss Piggy: Anyway, Moi is also shocked becasue moi has two scenes that are near the bottom of the list. Enjoy, anyway.
(the clips shown are the Pigs In Space skit where her weight causes the swinetrek to be tipped, and Miss Piggy chasing a thief in central park, from The Muppets Take Manhattan)
Fozzie bear: Wocka Wocka Wocka! Here are moments 47, 46, and 45, some of the funniest moments of all time.
Statler: That probably means they aren't the funniest moments ever.
(this leads to Muppet news skit where The Newsman gets blown up, the Wayne and Wanda skit where Wanda sings I Get a Kick out of you, and The Swedish Chef making Spaghetti)
Statler: hey, you know what I noticed about those funniest moments?
Fozzie Bear: You weren't in either of them.
(statler and waldorf laugh)
Rowlf: Now here are moments 44, 43, 42, and 41, all musical moments. And don't worry, we already paid for the rights to use them on a DVD release.
(the clips shown are: The Rainbow Connection, Friendship, Sweet vacation, and What Now My Love?)
Kermit: Hmmm, I wodner what The Rainbow Connection was doing at number 44...
Fozzie Bear: it was doing the backstroke!
Janice: And now, here is moment number 40, fer sure!
(the clip shown is the veterinarians Hospital skit where the patient is a cow)
Announcer: We will be back after these messages for moments 39-30.

 

[minor muppetz]

Statler: hey, you know what I noticed about those funniest moments?
Fozzie Bear: You weren't in either of them.
(statler and waldorf laugh)

Opps! This line was supposed to go....

Statler: You know what I noticed about those funniest moments?
Fozzie: What?
Statler: You weren't in any of them.
(statler and waldorf laugh)

 

[minor muppetz]

Part 2

Kermit: Welcome back. And now, here is Dr. teeth and the Electric mayhem with moments 39, 38, and 37.
Dr. Teeth: Thank you, Kermit.
Janice: Fer sure!
Floyd: By some coincidence....
Janice: ...That we can't rully explain...
Dr. Teeth: ...the next three moments....
Zoot:..uh, uh, ...I forgot my line.
(they all moan)
Lips: Your line is "feature us".
Animal: Us! Us!
Dr. Teeth: here are the clips!
(the clips are Night Life, Rockin' Robin, and Jingle bell Rock. The audience cheers)
Dr. Bunsen Honeydew: Well, beakie, are you ready to introduce the next 4 moments?
beaker: mee mee mee mee!
Bunsen Honeydew: Oh, good. The next four moments have to do with science.
Beaker: Mee mee mee mee!
(the clips are: Muppet Labs where Bunsen invents a gorrillia detector, Dr. Phil Van Neuter accidently presenting a Tales From The vet new years eve party, Time In A Bottle, and Muppet Labs where Beaker is duplicated)
Dr. Phil Van Neuter: And now, moments 42, 41, and 40 have to do with science fiction!
(these clips are: Hugga Wugga, Kermit interviewing the Koozebanian Phoob, and Kermit, Lindberg and Waldo going inside Digits brain)
Statler: There's something weird about this special.
Waldorf: Is it because many of the moments seem to be themed together?
Statler: Well, yes, but I was refferring to the fact that the muppets had enough moments for a top fifty list.
(they laugh)
Announcer: We'll be back after these messages.

 

[minor muppetz]

Part 3

Bean Bunny: Welcome back, everybody! And now, here is moment #29, one of the cutest muppet moments of all time...
(the clip is beans confrontation with The farmer from tale of The Bunny Picnic)
Sam The Eagle: Ugh! That was disgusting! Anyway, here is moment #28, one of Wayne and Wandas finest moments....
(the clip is Row Row Row)
Kermit: And now, ladies and gentlemen, here is moment #27, in which me and miss piggy rode bicycles together.
Miss Piggy: Well, it's about time we got a scene togetehr.
Kermit: no, it's about bicycles.
(this clip is Couldn't We Ride)
Lips: And now, here is clip #26, an Electric Mayhem moment from before I joined the group.
(this clip is Tenderly)
Robin: And now, here is a more serious moment, starring me.
(this clip is Halfway Down The Stairs)
Seymour: Welcome, everybody!
Pepe: You know, before I was a star, I was working with this dumb elephant, okay?
Seymour: There's a dumb elephant around here? Ahhh... (he runs away)
Pepe: Anyway, here is moment #24, okay!
(the clip is Seymour and Pepes elephino joke)
Pepe: And now, clip 23, one of my most embarrassing moments, okay!
(this clip is of Pepe wearing a tutu)
Gonzo: Huh, I don't know what's so embarrassing about that.
Rizzo: I do. Anyway, our next moment is filled with rats.
Gonzo: No, no, no, you mean chickens.
Rizzo: No, I mean rats.
Gonzo: just look at the list.
Rizzo: (Checking list) Oh, you're right. The rat moment is #21, chickens are #22.
(This leads to the next two clips: The chickens singing Baby Face, and Kermit and the Rats singing One More Sleep 'Till Christmas)
Scooter: Well, we'll be back after these messages.
Statler: Oh, yeah?
Waldorf: Well, we won't.
Statler: Come on, you old fool.
(they leave their seats)

 

[minor muppetz]

Part 4

Kermit: Well, we're back, and here is Scooter with our 20th best moment.
Scooter: Thank you, Kermit. This next moment was picked by my uncle who owns the theatre....
Kermit: Uh, Scooter, I thought the public voted for these moments.
Scooter: OH, they did, and my uncle says they have to agree with him.
(this clip is of J.P. Gross telling Kermit that he is turning the muppet theatre into a city dump)
Fozzie bear: And now, here is moment #19....
(this clip is "good grief! The comedians a bear!")
Sweetums: And now, here are some monster moments.
(the clips are There Are Milliosn of Us Who Are Ugly and the park skit with Madeline kahn and Doglion)
Kermit: Here are some great crowd scenes!
(the clips are: The finale of The Muppet Movie and She'll Make Me happy)
Clifford: We'll have some more great moments coming up!

 

[theprawncracker]

Just wanted to let you know that I'm reading this, and I love it! Can't wait for more!

 

[minor muppetz]

Part 5

(Statler and Waldorf come back to their balcony)
Statler: I can't believe that we are actually returning to watch the rest of this special.
Waldorf: I can't believe I bought Tivo just to record this.
Statler: I can't believe that we locked ourselves out of the car.
Waldorf: I can't beleive it's not butter.
Statler: You can't beleive it's not butter? I don't get it.
Waldorf: Well, you didn't order any.
(Cut to a booth where Kermit, Fozzie, Miss Piggy, Gonzo, Camillia, Robin, Scooter, Rizzo, and Pepe are sitting at. Clifford and Rowlf are standing in fron tof the table, and Bobo, Leon, Lew Zeland, and Sam are behind the table)
Fozzie bear: Well, this special turned out great.
Gonzo: Yes, but so far they haven't shown me catching a cannonball, holding onto balloons, eating a tire, hypnotizing myself, flirting with a cow...
Camillia: (concerned) Bawk!?
Gonzo: Oh, sorry, Camillia.
Clifford: Well, don't worry, Gonzo.
Rowlf: Yeah, the show's not over yet.
Scooter: Those moments still have a chance.
Sam: Though I don't know why your moments would get votes.
Kermit: Well, I think this has been a great evening, despite some of the poor choices so far.
Miss Piggy: That's right. Moi should be in all 50 clips.
Bobo: Why?
Miss Piggy: Do you want a karate chop?
Pepe: I'd rather have some pork chops, okay.
Link Hogthrob: (walking by) You'd better watch what you say, shrimp.
Pepe: I am not a shrimp,...
All: (joining in) ".....I am a king prawn."
Statler: These choices are poor. Where are our reviews of movies?
Waldorf: Probably at number one, but think of the bright side: We could be spending time with the wives.
(...at a table in front of an orchestra pit)
Floyd: We have had some great moments highlighted.
Janice: Fer sure!
Animal: Good evening! Good evening!
Dr. teeth: Yes, but why wasn't Money on the list yet?
Zoot: Why wasn't Sax And Violence on the list yet?
Lips: Where's Boogie In The barnyard?
(they all look at Lips)
Lips: hey, I just wanted my singing to be included.
Mahna Mahna: (pop[ping up) Where am I?
(everybody stares at Mahna Mahna)
Mahna Mahna: I mean, uh, Mahna Mahna!
Sal: (at podeum) Okay, welcome back, and now, make way for Johnny Fiama!
Johnny Fiama: Thanks for the intro, Sal. And now, here are moments 14, 13, and 12.
(these clips are: the Happiness Hotel song, Pepe unknowingly touching Tin Thing Gonzos nipples, and Fozzie gettign spray painted, looking like the grinch in the process)
Dr. Teeth: And now, here are two groovy clips.
(these clips are The Psychiatrist Office sketch from the sandra Bullock episode of Muppets Tonight!, and Mahna Mahna)
Digit: Now here is moment #9.
(this moment is The Music Just Keeps On Rolling Along)
Uncle Deadley: I am told that moments 8-4 need no introduction.
(these clips are: Kermit and Tony bennet singing Firefly, Beaker singing Feelings, Marvin Suggs and The Muppaphones singing Lady of Spain, Raquel Welch singing Someone Just Like You, and Return To Beneath The Planet of The Pigs)
Beauregard: I was told to introduce moments 3 and 2.
(these clips are: Real Live Girl and Carl The Big Mean Bagpipe Eater)
Kermit: Coming up next is moment number 1, so stay tuned!
(we see a shot of the audience)
announcer: What will the #1 muppet moment be? Is it The swedish Chef making lobsters, Beaker, Animal, and The Swedish Chef singign Danny Boy, The Gogolala Jubilee Jugband singing Does Your Chewing Gum Lose it's flavor on The bedpost overnight?, the unseen Snoop Dogg scene, or something else? Stay Tuned!

 

[theprawncracker]

*grabs edge of seat* Okay, I'm staying tuned...where is number 1?

 

[minor muppetz]

Chapter 6

(we see the entire audience getting ready for the number one moment)
The Newsman: I can't wait to know what the best clip is.
Fleet Scribbler; According to my rumor sources, it is Happy Feet.
Louis Kazagger: But that's always included. Why not something different, like the time Muppet Sports had wig racing?
(at another table...)
Miss Piggy: (to Foo Foo, who she holds in her hands) Well, Foo Foo, the number one spot has got to be the calendar Song, or maybe The First Time It Happens, or The Witch Is In The House, or perhaps the Moulin Scrooge sequence.
Foo Foo: Woof!
Miss Piggy: I just hope it isn't me melting or turning into a stone statue.
Pops: So, what do you think will be number one?
Beauregard: Oh, the finale of The Muppet Movie.
Pops: No, Bo, that was already seen.
Beauregard: Oh, in that case, it will probably be Happiness Hotel.
Bunsen: So, Beaker, what do you think will be number one?
Beaker: Mee Mee Mee Mee Mee Mee.
Bunsen: Oh, you're probably right.
Dr. Teeth: hey, I think I know what it will be.
Floyd: What, man?
Dr. teeth: My introduction from Rock Music With The Muppets.
Fozzie Bear: Maybe it will be me singing "Hey, You're As Funny As Fozzie bear".
Gonzo: I don't think it will be.
Fozzie bear: Oh, then it's just got to be the Pigs In Space skit where I played Miss Piggy.
Announcer: Ladies and gentlement, here is Kermit The Frog!
(the muppet show theme music starst to play)
Kermit: (singing) To introduce our winner, that's what I'm here to do, so it really makes me happy, to introduce to you.... THE NUMBER ONE MUPPET MOMENT OF ALL TIME!
(the screen is about to show the clip, with a 5-1 countdown, but then the projector breaks)
Lew Zeland: What happened?
(cut to the projection booth)
The Swedish Chef: Derr Film Flu Flip Flip Fliip Flip!
Nigel The Director: Oh, why do we keep putting you in the film projector room?
Kermit: Uh, don't worry, people, I've got a back-up disc. Scooter, go get it.
Scooter: Right, boss.
Baskerville: Well, I think the number one moment will be me auditioning for the part of the comedian.
Rowlf: Nonsense! It will be our Sherlock Holmes sketch.
Gorgon Heap: Oh, yeah! (starst to eat baskerville)
Baskerville: Oh, no, not again! (he gets swallowed)
Pepe: Of course! Now I know what will be number one. My Long John Silvers commercial, okay!
Seymour: It can't be.
Pepe: Why not?
Seymour: I wasn't in those commercials.
Animal: Fe-ver! Fe-Ver!
janice: Wow! Like, Animal thinks it will be his fever number with Rita Moreno, instead of Lips getting slammed in the door.
Bean Bunny: well, me getting slammed in the door is a lot cuter.
Sal: I prefer you getting thrown out the window.
Kermit: Okay, we've got the scene ready. Play it!
(the number 1 clip is... the film accidently breaking during The Muppet Movie)
Statler: Well, that was dissapointing.
Waldorf: Why?
Statler: I thought we would be getting free meals.
Bunsen: Well, Beaker, it looks like you were right, after all.
Beaker: Meep!
The Newsman: Well, Fleet, it looks like you were wrong after all.
Fozzie Bear: Hmm, well, it wasn't that foriegn film with The swedish Chef and Beaker from The Muppets Go To The Movies.
Kermit: Thank you all for watching and tune in next time we have a special event like this.
(the band plays the closing theme music as the credits roll over shots of the audience)