FanFic: A Little Knight Music

[Muppet Newsgirl]

Act Two, Scene One:

They went along the rain-soaked sidewalk, Nora pedaling at a slow pace and Scooter riding next to her on his skateboard.

The two teenage Muppets soon began chatting nine to the dozen about everything: school, their jobs, their families and friends, what kind of music and movies they liked, and so on and so forth.

"Yeah, I know Richard Hunt. He comes into the shop all the time." Nora laughed. "He's so funny, I mean, some of the jokes he told to Mrs. Farley…" She squeezed her brakes as they came to an intersection. "Her brother didn't like him, though."

"Good grief." Scooter shook his head, wondering how anyone could not get along with one of the Muppets' greatest friends. "So who is he?"

"His name is Julius Knotworth. He's the president of the local literary and dramatics society. At least, I think he was," Nora said. "Very prim and proper, a firm supporter of the classics and the great works. Rather strict, too."

"Nice guy," Scooter said with the barest hint of sarcasm.

"Oh, he's not that bad," Nora laughed. "But about Mr. Hunt -- are you related? You both have the same last name and all that."

"Call him Richard. If you called him Mr. Hunt to his face he'd remind you that Mr. Hunt was his father."

"Right, right. I'm too polite for my own good sometimes. But are you two related?" Nora asked as she squeezed her hand brakes.

"No, a lot of people around here have the name Hunt. But he and my dad were best friends." Scooter said. "It's kind of weird; sometimes I'm listed as Scooter Grosse, and sometimes as Scooter Hunt." He shrugged. "So I just write my last name as Hunt-Grosse." He quickly zipped around a large puddle on the sidewalk. "Now, more about you. How many brothers and sisters do you have?"

"Two sisters, ages twelve and seven, and two brothers, ages nineteen and twelve."

"So two of them are twins."

"Yeah, Caitlin and Stuart. A handful, times two. With my big brother Mike out of the house I've got to keep them and Heather in line. You're lucky, Scooter. You just have a twin sister."

"I don't know; Skeeter has her moments."

They turned onto Prell Lane, went several meters and came to a stop in front of Nora's house, a largish brick number with blue shutters.

"Here we are," Nora said, "Casa Brandon."

Heather, seven years old and the youngest, came out the door and saw Scooter and Nora standing on the front path. She giggled. "Nora's got a boyfriend, Nora's got a boyfriend…"

Scooter blushed. Nora gave Heather a mock-serious look before running over and scooping her up. "And that's enough out of you, short stuff."

There was an explosion from the basement. Nora moaned and put Heather down. "They're at it again."

Caitlin and Stuart, the twins, emerged from the basement, coughing and choking.

"I told you, the fertilizer was supposed to go in last!" Caitlin protested.

"No, we were supposed to put the pureed radishes in last!" Stuart snapped.

"I don't care who misread the instructions, just go clean it up!" Nora shouted. The twins disappeared inside, grumbling as they went. "I'm sorry," Nora said. "Those two have been die-hard science geeks since day one, and they're always up to something in the basement."

Scooter smiled. "I don't think anything they do could top Bunsen or Beaker." He glanced at his watch. "I have to run; my aunt's going to have dinner ready soon. See you later, then." He got back on his skateboard and zipped off, waving behind him as he went.

Heather tugged on Nora's hand. "He's nice. I like him."

Nora smiled. "Me too. Now let's get inside before Caitlin and Stuart decide to blow something else up."

------

Scooter rolled up to the corner of Moss and Hunt, and to the three-story Victorian number his family came home to each night.

Scooter made a sharp turn up the front path just as Skeeter appeared from around the corner on her bike and did a forward flip over the handlebars.

"Hiya, little bro," Skeeter greeted him. "What'd I miss at the theater today?" Skeeter also worked at the Muppet Theater, but she'd had to take the day off to work on a school project.

Scooter began counting on his fingers. "One flood, three explosions, five mental breakdowns, two of which came from Kermit, and one citation from the health inspector."

Skeeter snorted. "That's all? Oh, well, must have been an off day." She wheeled her bike into the garage. "Did you hear about that fire down at the Jane Nebel?"

"No I didn't."

"Richard called me and told me all about it. Sounds like it was quite the inferno." Skeeter threw open the door. "Nanny, we're home!"

"Come in, dears," Nancy called from her studio in the sunroom. "Were the roads all right? Any more rain and we'd have seen an ark floating by."

Nancy Grosse, formerly Nancy C. Takashi, had been married to J.P. Grosse for about sixteen years. She had met J.P. when Sadie, having just lost her husband, called Nancy looking for assistance in raising her twins. Now, Nancy worked as an illustrator for one of the local arts magazines, but to Scooter and Skeeter, she would always be their Nanny.

A few minutes later, Sadie pulled into the driveway, home from work at the Observer, the town paper. Last of all was J.P. Grosse, Sadie's older brother. As he emerged from his car and slammed the door, he was talking on his cell phone.

"Now, I want you to lease out the electric company and the water works, sell off Atlantic and Pennsylvania and put all our bets onto Park Place and Boardwalk," he said gruffly as he came in the door.

"Oh, Jerry, you spend too much time with the business deals," Nancy chided gently as she took off her purple cardigan and spread it over the back of a chair. "Come on, everyone, dinner's almost ready."

-----

Sadie yawned and sat down in her chair. "It was a long day at the office. Lots of assignments and phone calls…and Renee Louvier contacted me."

"The author? What'd she want?" J.P. asked between bites of potato.

"Oh…she was working on an alternate history of our family…in which I lose Scooter and Skeeter for several years, and we're all being terrorized by my tyrannical boss who's actually some demon from the beyond…and J.P., you know where my children are but you won't let me see them…"

J.P. and Nancy started laughing. "Sadie, I know I'm your big brother, but would I do that to you?" J.P. asked.

"She's got quite the imagination," Nancy smiled. "But is Mr. Fleet that bad a boss?"

"No, he's excellent. We've been nominated for a few media awards because of him," Sadie said. "Besides, the name of the evil boss in Renee's story was Eli or something." She glanced over at her son. "And this guy's really got it in for you, Scooter."

"I'm flattered," Scooter said flatly. "What does he do, try to stick me with poisoned needles and call it an accident?"

"How'd you know?"

"She's got her storylines posted on some web site. She's good friends with some people called the Count, Skeeter Muppet, super muppet, Bill the Bubble Guy and a lot of other people…and some journalistic nutcase who calls herself Muppet Newsgirl."

"But get a load of this…she has you fall in love with her alter ego, a girl named Sara. Isn't that sweet?"

"I've got homework to do," Scooter said quickly as he stood up and took his empty plate to the kitchen. Skeeter followed with her plate as the adults started laughing genially.

Scooter frowned as he put his plate in the sink. "What was that all about?"

"Well, I guess the author just wanted to somehow connect her story to the others in the fan network," Skeeter whispered. "Don't worry about it. You know how fans are, they all want to tell their own versions of how we live."

"I see. Fans, they're kind of funny, aren't they?

"Why can't they be? Now come on, I think we've sidetracked the plot long enough. We need to get scene two up and running," Skeeter said.

 

[ReneeLouvier]

*faints* X_X

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*faints again* *bolts up laughing and squealing*

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!! THAT'S JUST SO AWESOME!!!! I'm absoutley loving this story!!

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

(Scooter runs out onto stage holding a piece of paper.)

Scooter: I've just been asked to read a statement from the author. (clears throat) I, Muppet Newsgirl, do hereby disclaim any and all responsibility for any head injuries, rapid heart rates and/or terminal fits of giddiness that might be inflicted upon the readers during the course of this work. Thank you for your input and here now is act two, scene two of 'A Little Knight Music.' (looks up) How'd I do?

Muppet Newsgirl: Fine, just fine. Go get ready, you're on in ten.




Act Two, Scene Two:

"Come on in, Kermit's about to talk about the new play we're doing in a few weeks," Scooter whispered.

Nora edged her way in and sat down on the edge of the stage. She glanced out at the audience. Most of the company was gathered there, chattering, yelling, throwing paper airplanes and that sort of thing.

"Weirdoes, all weirdoes," Sam the Eagle muttered under his breath as he stalked in and took his seat.

"You guys seem to have all the fun," Nora whispered as Scooter sat down next to her.

"Well, it's a complete nuthouse around here half the time, but yeah, it is fun."

"How'd you get involved with these guys?"

"My uncle owns the theater." Scooter said. "When Skeeter and I were little, we'd kind of tag along and see what was going on here. And…well, at the risk of sounding horribly clichéd, I got a real thrill out of what went on. And I've wanted to be a part of it, even if it was just as the gofer."

"So what'd you do?"

"The day after my fourteenth birthday, I came down and asked Kermit if I could have a job." Scooter glanced over at Kermit, who was coming out onto the stage with a box of scripts. "I had to twist his arm a little bit, but he let me come aboard as a gofer. Later he let me be one of the actors."

"Wow."

"Later, Skeeter got in on the act. She's a gofer here too."

"Excuse me, could I have quiet, everyone?" Kermit asked over the din. "Quiet, please, people, I have an announcement."

The din continued. Kermit sighed resignedly.

"Excuse me, frog of my heart, but let moi handle it." Miss Piggy came to the front of the stage. "Would you turkeys just SHUT UP FOR TEN SECONDS!"

"So I said, like, I don't care if it's artistic, I'm not doing a nude spread on page three…" Janice noticed that everyone else had stopped talking. "Oh."

"The floor is yours, mon capitan," Miss Piggy said as she sat down to one side.

"Thanks, Piggy. All right, listen up, everyone. We'll be doing another book show in a month or so," Kermit announced. "It's called 'A Little Knight Music,' and it's a takeoff on the legend of King Arthur and Camelot."

A few curious murmurs swept through the audience.

"Now, this one will require a bit more preparation than the others. There's some technical stuff to get the hang of, a few musical and dance numbers, that sort of thing. But I promise, if we can pull it off it will look really great."

"When do we start auditions?" Fozzie asked.

"Tonight at seven, after everyone's had dinner."

"What kind of music is there?" Rowlf asked.

"It's your basic contemporary pop musical score, with medieval overtones."

"Will there be any sword fighting?" Gonzo asked eagerly.

"Lots."

"And…and catapults and castle invasions and really gruesome torture scenes?" Gonzo continued, gripping the back of the seat in front of him.

"Some. Any other questions…yes, Sam?"

"Kermit, will this production have any morally redeeming value?" Sam asked gruffly.

"Er…it should," Kermit said slowly. "Any more questions before I hand out the scripts?" The lights overhead buzzed out. "Clifford!"

"Don't look at me, Kerm, I just fixed those!" The magenta-skinned lighting director protested.

"Eeesh. Scooter, take a look at the circuit board, will you?"

"I'm on it, Chief." Scooter's red sneaker-clad feet padded away across the stage and into the backstage area.

Kermit gave Fozzie the scripts and told him to start handing them out, and sat down. "Nora, I have a favor to ask you."

"Anything I can do, Kermit."

"We're kind of short on female actors, and we need a young woman to play the part of Deirdre." Kermit said. "Would you be willing to audition?"

Nora's eyes widened. "Me? But I'm not a trained actor."

"No one around here is. But we make it work anyway. So what do you say? Can you do it?"

"Well...I think my grandmother would be okay with it. I'll do it."

Scooter came back. "I think someone's been playing with the circuit board."

"Hmm. Maybe the electrician was here or something," Kermit frowned. "All right, everyone, you've got the scripts. Be back here at seven."

 

[ReneeLouvier]

nice, nice as usual!!! *hugs Muppet Newsgirl tightly* I'm seriously loving this story!

More...please? Pretty please with a gofer on top?

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

*chokes* Ack! Renee, I think you just broke a rib. Would that all my writing could receive an equally enthusiastic response (sure, I got a 100 on my all-essays English lit midterm, but that's another matter).

Yes, there is more coming up quite soon.

 

[ReneeLouvier]

Oooh....I'm really sorry. *pats Muppet Newsgirl gently on the shoulder* Sorry about that. Didn't mean to be so rough!

But seriously, I really do love this story. And not just cause it's Scooter either! It's really well thought out, a nice way to put it as if it were a play itself.

Personally, my favorite parts were the Muppeters rowing through the streets. I could honestly see Richard at the helm, yelling at them and laughing happily.

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

This story is proof positive that a certain red-haired, orange-skinned gofer is quite a heartthrob.

If this has always been the case, I wonder if the other Muppeteers got jealous of Richard Hunt from time to time.

Act Two, Scene Three:

Nora opened the script and scanned through it, poring over the description of her intended role, Deirdre.

Deirdre was a sassy, sweet princess who had been booted out of her kingdom by her conniving older brother.

Nora scanned some of the lines. She felt a grin slowly spreading across her face. She could do this. She had years of practice of acting out plays with her siblings. That is, when they weren't trying to blow each other up or bore each other half to death.

She came back to Coming Unbound sometime later.

"Nora, where have you been? I needed someone to take some of the customers." Mrs. Farley said, frowning. There were five different pens stuck into her hair at odd angles.

"Sorry, boss…but I've just been asked to audition for a play." She showed her script to Mrs. Farley.

Mrs. Farley read the title of the script, and her eyes narrowed. "Nora, I don't think it's a good idea for you to be doing that."

Nora's eyes widened. "But I checked with my grandmother, and she says it's okay!"

"Nora, please. It's all right for you to go making deliveries to the Muppet Theater, but for you to be hanging around there and actually taking part in shows…" her voice trailed off. "It's not a good idea!"

"Why not?" Nora demanded, leaning forward on the desk. "It's not like I'm going to be walking over hot coals or anything!"

"Anything could happen to you! I've heard the kinds of things that go on up there! And I need you here as an assistant!"

"Then why did you send me up with deliveries?"

"Because a customer is a customer, and a paycheck is a paycheck!"

"Oh, so that's how it is? I thought you cared more about books and plays than dollars and cents!"

"Don't talk back to me that way! You're just a kid! What do you know about how things work?"

Nora slammed her fist on the desk. "I'm sixteen years old, Mrs. Farley! If I want to spend some of my spare time at the Muppet Theater, as a gofer, actor or stagehand, I'm going to and you can't stop me!"

There was a deadly silence, so deadly it ought to have been brought up on murder one.

"Fine. You can go to work at the Muppet Theater, but I'm going to have to curtail your wages." Mrs. Farley said primly. "Before you leave, there's a box of romance novels that just came in. Get them on the shelf. Now." She whirled around and turned back to the database.

Nora bit her lip and stomped off to the back room, fighting back angry tears.

----

Scooter stood outside, peering in through the shop window. He "just happened" to be passing by Coming Unbound on his way home to grab something to eat.

He had heard the entire angry exchange between Mrs. Farley and Nora. He felt a surge of sadness for Nora, and an urge to storm in there and give Mrs. Farley a piece of his mind.

He quickly snuck around to the back. He saw Nora through the open door, roughly hefting a box of novels. Her jaw was set in anger, but a few tears glistened in her eyes.

Scooter hesitantly knocked on the door.

"Customers have to come in through the front," Nora said bluntly as she turned around. She stopped. "Oh…Scooter."

"Are you okay?"

Nora nodded, and then shook her head. "You heard that, didn't you?"

"Yeah. She's being unreasonable. I mean, what you do outside of the shop is none of her business, right?"

Nora nodded.

"She may be your boss, but she's not your mother." Scooter cast a glance at the box. "Let me give you a hand with that."

"Okay…but, wait, if you come out from the back room, Mrs. Farley will start asking questions."

"Got it. I'll come in and pretend I'm there for the comics or something."

Scooter ran around front and came in the front door, just as Nora appeared from the back with the books. She plunked the box on the floor by one of the shelves in the back.

Scooter casually looked through some of the titles on the sci-fi shelf, waited until Mrs. Farley's back was turned, and nipped over to join Nora, now ruefully sliding the books onto the romance shelf.

"Thanks," she whispered.

Scooter took one of the books out of the box and made a face at the cover. "Who in their right mind would read this stuff?"

Nora smiled wanly. "I prefer mysteries, personally." She slid a few books with horribly clichéd titles like 'Flames of Amorous Passion' and 'Letters from the Broken Heart' on the shelf.

The bell over the door rang.

"Julius, how are you?"

"I'm fine, Louise, but you look frazzled."

Scooter looked over his shoulder. "Who's that?"

"That's Mr. Knotworth, Mrs. Farley's brother."

Julius Knotworth looked like a taller, male version of his sister, except his hair was black instead of blond. He carried himself across the shop with almost imperial posture. He glanced over and spotted Nora. "Why, Nora, you look down at the mouth."

Nora sighed. "I want to go to work at one of the theaters during my spare time, but your sister yelled at me for it. Then she docked my paycheck by a few dollars."

"Really, now?" Mr. Knotworth turned. "Louise, what is this? I think it's admirable that your young assistant wants to take part in the dramatic arts."

Scooter smirked; some of the stuff that went on at the Muppet Theater certainly wouldn't be construed as "art."

"I just don't think it's a good idea." Mrs. Farley said.

"Tsk. Nora, my dear, no paycheck can replace…the pensive soliloquy, the suspenseful dialogue, the verbal coup d'etat that will amaze and bewilder the patrons of the theater…"

By now, Scooter was practically convulsing with muffled laughter at Mr. Knotworth's absurdly pretentious ode to the performing arts.

"Mr. Knotworth, why aren't you at your meeting of the dramatics society?" Nora asked while silently gesturing to Scooter to get a hold of himself.

Mr. Knotworth sighed. "Well, Nora, I…decided to step aside. The society is going in directions that I never could have conceived. No matter, though, I still have many important things to oversee." He smiled at Nora. "Tread the boards if you will, young Nora, if that is what you so wish."

Mrs. Farley sighed.

Nora came up to the counter. "I've stocked the books, Mrs. Farley."

"Very good. You may go now," Mrs. Farley said coolly as she started to unload the cash register.

-----

"Nora, I never asked you something…I've met your brothers and sisters, and I know your dad's out of town, but where's your mom?"

Nora bit her lip. "She's over on Maury Street."

Scooter was about to ask what she meant by that, when he remembered that Maury Street was where the Rainbow Memories Cemetery was located.

"Oh. I'm sorry…when did she…"

"Right after Heather was born."

Scooter looked down at the ground and scuffed the toe of one sneaker against the sidewalk. "If it's any comfort, I know how you feel. My dad died when Skeeter and I were little. We don't remember him all that well but we still miss him. Mom does, too." He looked over at Nora. "What part are you auditioning for?"

Nora showed him the script. "Deirdre. I think she's a new character or something. What about you?"

"Kermit wants me to go in for Galahad." Scooter opened his script and quickly scanned the first page.

He flipped ahead a few pages and felt his cheeks go red. According to the script, Galahad was supposed to fall in love with Deirdre.

This is gonna be awkward, he thought.

 

[ReneeLouvier]

Eeeee!! Awesome! More, more, more! Ooh, and if you can, as you've said you've typed up the whole thing before posting, could you email it too me?

reneelouvier@gmail.com

I love to keep offline copies of stories.

 

[Muppet Newsgirl]

I'll see what I can do. The thing is, I've got the acts saved in six different files, and I still need to fill in some stuff on act six. Plus, I tend to edit some stuff as I cut and paste it from the Word documents into the Reply box, so I'd have to go back and edit the original text as well.

It's possible; it'd just take me a while.

 

[ReneeLouvier]

Thank you. I do not mind, take as much time as you like. Also I've written another chapter for "F.W." hope you like it, and I'll be off soon, as I'm getting tired and a bit cranky at how this stupid story of mine is coming out to be. X_X It's really hard to keep up with all this stuff, and I'm starting to make some HUGE mistakes.