"The Moppet Family - Same Family, New Thread..."

[Beauregard]

Shark 1: Let's go judge something...
Shark 2: Two barristers walk into a bar...
Shark 3: Ouch...

--

Father: *falls, popping buttons off shirt* Drats...ooh, I look like the Hulk like this...

 

[Vibs]

They drive for a bit, and suddenly the engines screech. The car stops outside an abandoned hut of some sort, in the middle of the woods somewhere.

Rosa: right, "Hulk", we're here. *gets out of car and slams the door, opens father's door* Now get out we ain't got all day.

___________

Viq: Right, on the count of three you will be here Vibs or I'll... think of something threatening to do!

Vibs: *pops up* relax I'm here, just had some sharks to deal with. From now on brother, the seas will be perfectly just.

 

[Beauregard]

Sharks: *running away from a team of galloping sea-horses*

--

Father: An abandoned hut in the middle of scented woods surounded by stars and darkness, being tempted inside by a woman both tall and...lean...what is one to do...except...*swallows* Resist! *turns to run and trips over ropes, landing in a pile of autumn leaves* Typical...

 

[Vibs]

Rosa: Wau, that was stupid. *pulls Father on his feet* Look, I hate this more than you, trust me, but you happened to be the only person back there I could kidnap ... and I just... get... I get all... *starts to grunt*... annoyed... *tries to hold it in*... when people... *tries to restrain herself*... go steal my... my... MY.... *obviously fails* MY MONEY! MINE! MIIIIIIIINE MWUAHAHAHhahahahHAHA ARRRGHHHA NAAAAAH!

...

Sorry, that was unfortunate. *pushes Father inside the hut* I have tried to retire you know, get myself a respectable job. I just... I hate when people TAKE MY MO- okay hold it in Rosey sweetie, hold it in... breathe... good. Now, sit Moppet.

____________

Viq: ... and that's what happened.

Vibs: And you want me to help Father get back? Hello! We're rich and without parents! This is the greatest thing that could ever happen to us!

 

[Beauregard]

Father: Oh no...oh, please, don't...just don't cry on me, Rosa. You want me to sit, ok. I'll sit. *sits* There. is that better? Now, why don't you sit down here beside me and tell me all about it. Did your mother take money from you when you were a child and wanted to buy those red lollipops and she wanted to acquire assets...is that why you love money? -- Oh, wait, that's what happened to me...

--

Hevej: *stepping into the kitchen* Not so quick, my land-lubbing blubberers...When your father and mother married, your dad signed a contract to me that meant I looked after any or all rascals he brought about if he was ever incapacitated.

 

[Vibs]

Rosa: Well I.. *sniffs*.. I kinda could need a.. *snivel* shoulder to.. *jaw shaking*.. cry on... WAAhahahaaaaaaaaa..... *stops* .... honestly, what do you take me for? You must be outta your mind, anyway make yourself comfortable I'll go make myself a snack. *thinks* Or actually... why don't YOU go make me a snack? Of course then I would have to untie you. Hmm. Okay. *Unties Father* But you should know I locked the door, and there are bears outside. Anyway, starving, food, now.

_____________

Viq: ooh wau, for a moment I thought we were free to do whatever we wanted. That would have been too much freedom and pressure on me.

Vibs: *blinks* Okay now we're definatly going to free Father! Rather him than mister "Aye be there a fish up my nose, I'm too drunk to lift my arms and feel." Off we go, byyeee!

 

[Beauregard]

Father: *blinks* Ok...ok, that's good. It's a good start. It's healthy to...ouch! Yes, yes, I am getting you a snack. *smiles slightly smuggly* We all need a little comfort food now and then...what do you need, Rosa?

--

Hevej: Aye! There be a fish up my nose, and I'm too drunk to life my arms and feel! *collapses*

 

[Vibs]

Rosa: Eh hmm.. I'll have a.. wait, what! LOOK, moppet, I am not sad, only for having you in my house and if I hadn't sworn to myself that I would never, ever do anything criminal again I promise you I would smear you in honey, then roll you in sugar, then glue pies all over you and tie you to a tree outside!

... *father clearly doesn't get it* - *rosa rolls eyes* Because then bears would eat you! *mumbles something* and gimme a diet coke and an apple.

 

[Beauregard]

Father: *clearly doesn't get it* See that is exactly the type of thing my wife would probably take the wrong way...*open fridge, swaps "Diet Coke" lable with the regular coke* Here.

 

[Vibs]

Rosa: Thanks... *opens it, takes a swallow... gasps* What... is... this? I... I... I love it! Gimme another one!

_____________

Viq: So he didn't go to Africa...

Vibs: nope. *crosses that from list*