"The Moppet Family - Same Family, New Thread..."

DanDanStrawberry

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DanDan: Shower? Showers are for sissies, I haven't showered in 17 years. I stole the idea from that documentary, Bridget Jones' Diary. Except instead of giving up smoking, I've given up any form of cleanliness. Anyway, can I help you?
 

Beauregard

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Father: Actually, I've quite forgotten why I called, except to say Hello and that, as an inlaw, it's been a long while since we actually got together in any sort of a, er, what is the phrase I al looking for...a manly man-to-thing chat. But you were saying something about smokeing? Do you still smoke?
 

DanDanStrawberry

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*on phone* DanDan: What?? Choke?? You're choking?? I'll be right over!! *puts phone in goldfish bowl and gets into lemon-car*
 

Beauregard

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Father: *bad reception* What? Who's chokeing? Dandan? *slams phone down* Viq, guard the tv, Dandan's choking again...*gets in smart, waxed car*
 

DanDanStrawberry

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*Drives past Father without noticing, who is driving to DanDan's house*
DanDan: Don't worry, Mr. Moppet. I'm a-coming.
 

Beauregard

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Father: *drives with one hand on the steering wheel, while trying to tune in the radio with the other* Wow...if Dandan were to really choke and...be gone from this blue and green planet we call earth...I don't know what I'd do...sometimes, it feels he is a strange, weird, freaked out, gross, big-toenailed in-law...but at other times, she's a friend...and...if anything were to happen...*lemon car goes past window pretty darn close* STUPID NO GOOD BANANA EATING DRIVER!!!
 

DanDanStrawberry

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Wow!! That cotton-eating berry-picker could have killed me! If they had to plan another funeral for me I'm not sure they could afford it! I'd better drive more carefully *takes feet off steering wheel and drives with hands* I'M COMING MR. MOPPET, *nearly at Moppet's house*
 

Beauregard

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*nearly at Dandan's house...shoe...thing* *tunes radio with bost hands and steers with knees* Did he say chokeing? Maybe it was Jokeing...oh, how embarasing if I turned up and he wasn't dead...
 

DanDanStrawberry

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*knocks at Moppet household's front door with watermelon*
*watermelon smashes*
Oh no, this can only mean one thing!!

*cut to: DanDan in lemon car driving down front door*

Oh! What are the odds, I have a key in the car! Oh well, shoulda woulda coulda...
 

RedDragon

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<drops from rafters, flips in the air, and lands perfectly on her feet>

That's better...

<walks out of church>

Now which way is home?....
 
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