The Lovesick Teenager Clud Threab

[D'Snowth]

Boy...

I thought I was doing so much better... I really did... as a matter of fact, yesterday was probably the best day I've had, mentally, in a long time, as I hardly given "the girl" any thought, and my mind was rather calm and collected all day... I thought that was a sign that I was doing better, and that things would continue to get better.

No such luck. It all finally came to a breaking point. For sound reasons, in the middle of the night last night, I had just an absolute nervous breakdown, it was so pathetic. I just couldn't take it anymore, it kept just building up and building up, and until finally, it all just came out in the form of tears and sobs.

After pondering about it for a while (even before this happened actually), I came to the decision that before anything else (or anything worse) were to happen, that I should just call off my friendship with this girl... and I did. And it was so hard to do... I've experienced broken friendships before, but never before had I been the one to say to another "we shouldn't be friends anymore", and it hurt so much... in a way, I almost feel like I'm betraying some one who considered me their friend. But I'm trying to look at the big picture, and really, I'm not just doing this for myself to TRY to get my mind off things, but I'm doing those who are involved and not directly involved in this situation.

Besides, I should be happy for her... she had found her Mr. Right a long time ago, so I really had no right to fall in love with her to begin with, but I did, and I couldn't help it... again, it was an accident... I was accidentally in love.

So... basically that's it. I guess she's out of my life completely now... only time will tell when I can finally stop thinking about her, and just simply move on with my life so everything can go back to abnormal.

 

[PurpleHonker]

Hang in there. It's unimaginably difficult right now, but you have tons of Muppet fans and other friends around to chat with you, laugh with you, and be there with you. There is nothing so horrible as the way you're feeling, and everyone says the same stuff about how it's "just going to take time" and all that stuff - They're not the strongest words of condolences, but, as hard as it is to believe, it actually is the truth. Please don't feel like you're alone on this. Many of us have been there a time or two, and everybody here is around if you need us. You'll survive and be stronger just like the rest of us.

 

[D'Snowth]

You've got some nice points there PH.

You're absolutely right there, this whole situation really in unimaginable... not just unimaginably difficult, but unimaginable in every shape and form.

Admittedly, I can't help but wonder how she reacted to me telling her we shouldn't be friends anymore... I still felt rather bad about doing that in the first place, but I'm sure this really is for the best, and leaving the forum where we both hang out was probably a wise decision too. I know it's going to take time, but that's something I can continue to work on. Only time will tell when I can forget about her completely.

I remember a friend of mine telling me once that I should channel out negative feelings like this through creativity, but it seems like right now, I'm at a creative slump... I can't think of anything to draw, I can't think of anything to write about, and I still have to wait and order necessary fabric to finish puppet building.

But at least you guys are here when I need ya, so thanks for putting up with my pathetic love blues.

*Cranks up radio* LOVE STINKS!

 

[PurpleHonker]

You wonder how she reacted - meaning you told her this electronically? Wow, that has to be rough!

Ultimately you have to do what is best and right for YOU, though, and it sounds as though that's exactly what you did. You should be proud of that because, as hard as it was in the given situation, you took care of yourself the healthiest way possible. It took courage and a lot of anguish, but it is done, and you can begin to recover and grow again.

I've also heard that advice about channeling out the negativity through creativity, and I gotta say, I struggled with it too! When you feel down, it's hard to jump into a creative endeavor that is usually a source of happiness. It's just so hard to "get there". What I've done to combat that is to work with something that I hate to work with (like oils or clay), and created something as ugly as I was feeling to try to release all that in a cathartic kind of way. It never worked completely, but it took the edge off... well at least I made a big mess

I don't know what it is that you need to/can do to move along in your process of feeling better, but I'm positive you'll find it.

 

[D'Snowth]

Yes, as I've mentioned before, I only know this girl through another forum I post at; this is where I met her, and got to know her... and after over a year later, ended up falling in love with her, again, despite her already having her Mr. Right. And it was really rough, I actually choked up as I typed up the PM, and hesitated as I hit the "Send message" button, knowing after this, there is no turning back.

I never really thought about it to that extent, but I suppose you're right... thanks loads for the words PH, while I'm still not quite completely over the feelings of loneliness of not having a special someone, and still feeling like a bit of a ******* over ending a rather nice friendship, you've managed take a bit of that same edge off.

 

[PurpleHonker]

You're quite welcome. Hang in there; it'll get so much better.

 

[D'Snowth]

Well, how do you like that?

So after I decided the best thing to do was to end my friendship with this girl to try and erase her from my life and avoid anything else happening, I went and removed her contact info from other accounts of mine, but I didn't bother to remove her from my YIM, since she never got on anyway.

So I logged onto YIM for the weekend tonight, and lo and behold, she HAD been on YIM since then, as my confirmation is no longer pending...

GARHHH, this is so frustrating! Why couldn't I have fallen in love with a girl who was SINGLE?

I'll tell you one thing... this is it... I had my taste of what love is like, I've felt what real lovesickness feels like, and I've lived through the tourment... so now that I've experienced all that, I am NOT going through with that again. Yes sirrie, I'm done with girls, I'ma make sure I remain single till the day I die.

 

[Beakerfan]

^ That makes me sad....

I don't think i'm lovesick right now so much as i'm sick of people falling in love with me... all I want is ONE person (whom I love) to fall in love with me and then that's it for the rest of my life! Although, I will say there is one person I've had a crush on for a very long time and I don't think he realizes it, nor is he interested in me as far as I can tell Oh well... it's probably for the best.

 

[D'Snowth]

I don't think i'm lovesick right now so much as i'm sick of people falling in love with me

Perhaps you should take a hint from that one new nurse at the 4077th and wear a ring on your finger "to cut down on the wrestling matches".

As for myself, I'm muttling through, though occasionally, I still can't help but wonder exactly how The Girl reacted to the PM I sent her. You know, I got to thinking about it the other night, and I think I probably would've done so much better if she actually DID hate me because of some of the compliments I gave her... the LEAST she could've done was call me "fresh", lol. I think her being flattered only "encouraged" me.

 

[APRena]

My brief yet wonderful interactions with Guidance Guy *name obviously changed to protect the innocent, but now I'm just stalling* have ended. Outcome of my mental dilemma *drumroll pleeease*:

I didn't do anything, I just sat there dumb and meek on the last day. This is pretty much the first time I COULD have even realistically made any sort of move on my crush. I didn't say anything, and now I'm alternating beating myself up over it and telling myself I made the right decision. It's over with, and I still can't stick with my own opinion.