The Golden Karat: A Henson Noir

[Zephyr]

1
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If appearances could disgust; then this guy made my stomach squirm with his shifty presence.
The person in question was an individual who keeps me active in cases and answers to the issues that plague a two-bit private eye like myself, some of the cases were caused by him entirely. “Lefty” was shady in disposition and work ethic, the glaring dirtied trenchcoat didn’t help change his image much.
Shadiness aside, he strolled into my office with a look that could sour milk and took a seat onto one of my guest chairs. He didn’t even notice that I was busy at the moment; playing with a yo-yo was serious business.
“My boss would like some...personal assistance with a case” Lefty did not utter a greeting, just a demand coming from his lime colored lips.
I gave him a demand back, to his sardonic surprise.
“Ask someone else Lefty, my entire job isn’t built on Benny’s various failed schemes”, my career as a detective shouldn’t be based around Lefty’s superiors or their various businesses behind the streets. A servant of justice should not be swayed by the forces of greed, yet it happened again. Lefty pulled out a crumpled yellowed envelope from his coat pocket and nudged it towards me, bits of paper trailing my desk. My furred hands caught the bouncing yo-yo, I ended my game and placed it back in the bowels of my desk.
“M...My allegiance is with a new outfit” His deep voice scraped like a blade on a wet stone, “An outfit that pays well for those who are more understanding of little guys like us”. His hands nudged the envelope to me more, I gripped it in my mitts and tore open the yellow paper.
A wad of unmarked hundreds were crumpled into a golden note.
Enough hundreds to put my salary out of misery.
My first thought was to inquire about how he got this cash but questioning Lefty on his wares is futile. The guy has a history of selling the absurd and getting off scot free, except the “AN Incident” but that’s for another tale. The snake grinned at my befuddlement over the cash, I was baited in.
“What’s the problem that needs paying me this much? I remember most of our past transactions were a bit lower than this” my question apparently struck him as he then went into deep thought, as he was trying to word out an issue without offending someone. That someone being me.
“Well my superiors need assistance with solving a recent stealing of our shipments, cargo that cannot be replaced with money” his lips pursed at the last sentence.
“What type of cargo?” I asked, placing the bills back on the desk.
“Pure Gold Bullion, straight from the furred bank of Hensonville” Lefty dragged his chair closer to the desk and leaned towards me, I backed up a bit.
He whispered to me in a cold tone; “We cannot lose this shipment to some thugs, our livelihoods depend on this gold. If you catch the mugs who stole our stuff, we’ll give you the other hundreds that couldn’t fit in the letter and make you a rich frackle”.
Pushing his chair back, Lefty got up and began to leave for the office door. His head turned back to eye me once more, his furrowed brow staring me down like a bird of prey.
“There’s a phone number on the envelope, give my boss a call about the job and he’ll give you the crime scene” His voice drifted as the creaky door screeched on its hinges.
“And Harvey, don’t disappoint us like the last few detectives under my connections, they don’t acquire a billfold as you do”.
The door finally closed, grim solitude took hold of me.
Hundred dollars or Justice, I contemplated my choices as the phone was fidgeted around. The payment would be great and it could signal me to leave that ****** green salesmen and his boss, although I could take back the gold to the authorities like a good detective.
My mind made itself up as the dial tone started. There was a mystery afoot.

 

[Zephyr]

(Note: this story is done entirely in a pulp prose style as a tribute towards the Humphrey Bogart detective films and written works of Raymond Chandler.)

 

[Zephyr]

(Another Note: Be warned, this story will also feature a little romance as well.)

 

[Zephyr]

2​

“Okay bud your stop ends here, now gimme a few bucks and scram!”
I fished into my long coat and handed the grouch his payment; only to be given a forceful push from the taxi driver into the bank sidewalk. Note to self, never take a grouch taxi and ride the bus instead. The taxi swerved off while I scraped up from the stone floor, a gruff cackling erupted from the speeding vehicle before it started colliding with trash cans and other vehicles, plain usual madness of the town.
Usual for a civilian in Hensonville, you can never have much quiet in the burg.
Security was tight at the bank entrance; several armored policemen patrolled the entrance between the two bronze monster statues. Police taped lined the front door in a mustard web. This must’ve been some nightly steal. Taking one last breath of confidence, I strolled up to the front entrance.
One guard took notice and raised his hand, “Hold it right there pal! This place is temporarily shut down for the moment” said the man under his protective mask.
“The name’s Harvey Eazy, private eye” I flashed out a leather wallet with a bronze badge. “Mr. Hunt and his associates permitted me to investigate the scene as well, if you’ll let me in”.
After a brief checking of identification, both men stood aside from the entrance and buzzed a small electronic device attached to their bulletproof vests.
Stepping over the tape, I entered the building unaware of what was to be found.
A horrendous stench hit the room.
—-
Place smelled like old money and it wasn’t just the owner’s cologne; the bank floors were strewn in dollar bills and chalk outlines being filled.
One officer was interrogating the old man who ruled over the building. He was a grey bearded man nervously smoking a cigarette,scared out his mind in my eyes. Three other officers were chatting up a teller next to a massive opened steel safe. One that took the entire left wall of the bank. The teller was gibbering something bemusing to one officer, as the other was scanning over the safe door with an ultraviolet light.
Better check out the teller first, seems young and less frightful.
“Greetings gentlemen” I said strolling into the trio by the safe. Both men broke contact from their conversation and stared at the small frackle in front of them.
“Who’s this guy” asked the cop.
“The name’s Eazy, Detective Harvey Eazy and I was sent over with permission to assist with the investigation” my reply seemed to resonate with the teller, whose expression changed from concern to confusion.
“You're the Detective that was sent, I thought you would be a bit more…”
“Taller, yeah yeah I get that alot often from youngsters” I replied.
“So you should already know that there was a break-in, we practically lost all the gold bars being transferred to Tennessee in a few months” explained Hunt pointing towards the safe.
The safe was empty. Even when looking down into the steel void it still looked expansive. Flakes of metallic dust coated the safe shelves in a gold snow. Hunt began to point out the various details at a rapid pace. I whipped out my notepad and started to jot his words down with a dirtied pencil.
“So what was this gold needed for exactly?” I inquired, the other officers listened as well.
“Well the people withdrawing the gold belong to a very prominent entertainer and a rich one at that. He desired to melt down gold he had in deposit and use it to create a statue based on his mascot for some television show” Hunt replied. “We never got a full explanation for his gold withdrawal and my boss, Mr. Nelson couldn’t get a word from our client at all”.
Who would have gold shipped to him? Sounds like shady business to me.
“And that leads to my other question, when did this robbery happened exactly?” My pad started to fill in with details on the gold dust and mysterious client, that’s when my eyes caught an odd shine in the darkness of the safe floor.
“Well it happened three days ago, The bank alarms were signaled around 12:58 a.m. to 1:30 a.m. and the robbers obviously took control of our armored vans since they were missing from the back entrance” Hunt continued on in a rapid tone but taking deep breaths between sentences.
“The place reeked of blowtorch fuel and we found the lock to have been…”
“Cut through, yeah I can see that the bronze lock on your safe to have been cut out” I cut off the officer, pointing towards the complicated metal lock scorched to non-existence and lacking combination numbers. My focus still trained on the shiny object on the floor, Mr. Hunt took notice as well.
Before he could utter a question; I hopped down into the safe and landed with a slight thud.
“You okay?” asked the officer, my body was shaking like a rattled gong from landing head first. Upon shaking, I gave a jittering thumbs up and started to inspect the metal room, rubbing away the pain on my bruised flattened head.
Someone left their footwear where it shouldn’t be.
Patches of hair poked out from the lace holes, as red coloring faded into a shade of light pink. The shoe was extra-large in size, enough to fill a monster or grouch if they wanted to go jogging. Mr. Hunt slipped down and landed with the same gong sound accompanying his landing, the cops were not careful.
“What did you find?” He wheezed as the impact left a jittery feeling from his feet to head.
“A leftover shoe, your culprits were not very stealthy” pulling the shoe up to my nose by its tag and taking a deep sniff. A pungent smell hit my senses, no air freshner could drown out the gagging sensation hitting my nostrils.
“Also they didn’t bathe that night, good grief!!!” I gagged.
“And?” asked the young teller impatiently.
“There’s a few black hairs poking out of this, I’ll have to confiscate this for evidence and check it out” I replied with a choke. Pulling out a large plastic bag from my left coat pocket, the shoe was wrapped up without any tampering with the hairs or possible footprints.
“You said that the perpetrators stole two of vans right?” Hunt nodded to me.
“Then why don’t you fax me the serial numbers on their license plates and other details from their owner’s” I said.
Hunt nodded once more in agreement and we were pulled back up. Evidence tightly tucked inside my furry arm. Someone under Lefty’s radar had left his crew a small detail and one that could solve the bank’s robbery. But this feels fishy. Why would anybody rob that much gold and be this sloppy. Most high stakes crimes are done precisely without drawing attention.
Maybe this is a setup or another one of Benny’s many schemes that rope me in. I have yet to find out and the dread in my gourd is pounding.
This case is going to be the death of me.