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The New Adventures of Letterman
Hot Hockey Match
A fanfic by Cullen Pittman
It's hockey season. And we see a stadium full of fans, along with the two ice hockey teams. The X-rays, who got the name for being x-rayed so many times for broken teeth and bones. And the Xylophones, who got their name for having colorful personalities, while tough with the sticks.
As the game started, we see Letterman in the high top row enjoying the game while wearing a letter x jersey. Say Letterman, whose team are you rooting for? The X-rays or the Xylophones?
"Oh, I'm just rooting that both teams will have fun and not hurt themselves at all." smiled Letterman.
"Goody good sport!" shouted the Spellbinder from the bottom row. Then our villain looked at his hot dog. "This dog is not cooked all the way!" he shouted. "I should fix that concession stand."
Just then, he noticed one of the Xylophones about to make a winning GOAL.
"Or better yet, make my own BBQ pit right here." cackled the Spellbinder. "He took out his magic wand and changed the G in GOAL into a C. Creating COAL.
Suddenly, the hockey players smelled something burning. They looked down and found hot red coals all over the ice. "Quick everyone!" shouted the referee. "To the penalty boxes!"
"But we didn't do anything wrong." said one of the players.
"It's wrong to get our feet burned!" shouted the ref. "Follow me!" And the ref and all the players rushed into the safety of the penalty boxes. The crowd watched horrified as the red coals in the rink started to catch fire.
"Now that's better!" laughed the Spellbinder evily, as he stuck his hot dog on a stick and started to roast it over the coals. "Now this is a real hot game!"
"This is definitely a fire hazard!" shouted Letterman as he flew above the flaming rink. Faster than a rolling O. Stronger than Silent E. Able to leap capital T in a single bound. It's a word. It's a plan. It's Letterman!
"I'm Letterman," said our hero, but then looked at his sweater. "But all I have is an X. How can I stop those burning coals? Wait, this might work." So Letterman removed the X from his chest and put it over the L in COAL and made the word COAX.
"COAX?" asked one of the hockey players in the box. "Good, I'm thirsty. We all could use some ice cold colas."
"Not that kind of coax." sighed the referee.
Letterman then flew a little closer to the coals, but not too close to the flames. "Hi, little coals," said Letterman calmly. "How about turning down the heat? These nice people came here to see a hockey game and you're all kind of ruining it for everyone. Both the fans and the noble players who got unfairly sent to the penalty boxes. So can you all cease the burning, please?"
The coals, who had been coaxed by Letterman's reasoning, suddenly stopped burning and became harmless. Then the cleaners and zambonis came and removed the gray coals and smoothed out the ice again.
"Hey, my hot dog's still not done!" shouted the Spellbinder. But then the zamboni swerved by and covered the villain in snow making him looking like a snowman with a turban. Along with giving him eyes, nose, and a mouth made of coals.
"YAAAAY!" shouted the crowd as well as the hockey players and the ref who got back on the ice. "Thank you Letterman!" shouted the players who raised their sticks in gratitude.
"My pleasure," smiled Letterman as he took out one last harmless coal and dropped it on the ice so they could use it as a hockey puck and continue playing.
So who will win this game, the Xylophones or the X-rays? Guess you'll have to read all about it in tomorrow's sports page, since this is the end of the episode.
THE END
Hot Hockey Match
A fanfic by Cullen Pittman
It's hockey season. And we see a stadium full of fans, along with the two ice hockey teams. The X-rays, who got the name for being x-rayed so many times for broken teeth and bones. And the Xylophones, who got their name for having colorful personalities, while tough with the sticks.
As the game started, we see Letterman in the high top row enjoying the game while wearing a letter x jersey. Say Letterman, whose team are you rooting for? The X-rays or the Xylophones?
"Oh, I'm just rooting that both teams will have fun and not hurt themselves at all." smiled Letterman.
"Goody good sport!" shouted the Spellbinder from the bottom row. Then our villain looked at his hot dog. "This dog is not cooked all the way!" he shouted. "I should fix that concession stand."
Just then, he noticed one of the Xylophones about to make a winning GOAL.
"Or better yet, make my own BBQ pit right here." cackled the Spellbinder. "He took out his magic wand and changed the G in GOAL into a C. Creating COAL.
Suddenly, the hockey players smelled something burning. They looked down and found hot red coals all over the ice. "Quick everyone!" shouted the referee. "To the penalty boxes!"
"But we didn't do anything wrong." said one of the players.
"It's wrong to get our feet burned!" shouted the ref. "Follow me!" And the ref and all the players rushed into the safety of the penalty boxes. The crowd watched horrified as the red coals in the rink started to catch fire.
"Now that's better!" laughed the Spellbinder evily, as he stuck his hot dog on a stick and started to roast it over the coals. "Now this is a real hot game!"
"This is definitely a fire hazard!" shouted Letterman as he flew above the flaming rink. Faster than a rolling O. Stronger than Silent E. Able to leap capital T in a single bound. It's a word. It's a plan. It's Letterman!
"I'm Letterman," said our hero, but then looked at his sweater. "But all I have is an X. How can I stop those burning coals? Wait, this might work." So Letterman removed the X from his chest and put it over the L in COAL and made the word COAX.
"COAX?" asked one of the hockey players in the box. "Good, I'm thirsty. We all could use some ice cold colas."
"Not that kind of coax." sighed the referee.
Letterman then flew a little closer to the coals, but not too close to the flames. "Hi, little coals," said Letterman calmly. "How about turning down the heat? These nice people came here to see a hockey game and you're all kind of ruining it for everyone. Both the fans and the noble players who got unfairly sent to the penalty boxes. So can you all cease the burning, please?"
The coals, who had been coaxed by Letterman's reasoning, suddenly stopped burning and became harmless. Then the cleaners and zambonis came and removed the gray coals and smoothed out the ice again.
"Hey, my hot dog's still not done!" shouted the Spellbinder. But then the zamboni swerved by and covered the villain in snow making him looking like a snowman with a turban. Along with giving him eyes, nose, and a mouth made of coals.
"YAAAAY!" shouted the crowd as well as the hockey players and the ref who got back on the ice. "Thank you Letterman!" shouted the players who raised their sticks in gratitude.
"My pleasure," smiled Letterman as he took out one last harmless coal and dropped it on the ice so they could use it as a hockey puck and continue playing.
So who will win this game, the Xylophones or the X-rays? Guess you'll have to read all about it in tomorrow's sports page, since this is the end of the episode.
THE END