Stupid Question About Maiden Names

[redBoobergurl]

It's a good question Snowthy - I don't really feel strongly one way or the other. I took my husband's name because I felt like being traditional and that we were becoming a family so I wanted us to share that. I also felt because his last name is a little long that having my name and his name together would be too much. I know for some women, depending on their profession, they prefer to keep their last names for that reason. I have a friend who works in sales and her clients identified and had trust with her name and she didn't want to change it and throw them off. I don't judge what people do either way.

The only place I still use my maiden name is on Facebook simply so old classmates and such can find me, but that's about it.

 

[Fragglemuppet]

Yes, hadn't even thought of same-sex couples, but that's a good point. Also I've heard of many people doing it for business reasons. Also, if a family name is very important to a woman, I can understand her not wanting it to die out. As for hyphenated names stretching to infinity and beyond throughout the generations, I don't know about that. I did go to school with a set of twins who had a hyphenated name.

 

[King Rupert]

I guess I am kind of old fashioned. But if my wife had elected not to take my last name, it probably would've bothered me.

Part of being married is becoming one, being individuals is important but you're stronger as a whole. I think the family name is a part of that.

 

[PurpleHonker]

It's just a personal choice that varies from person to person

My maiden name was aesthetically pleasing, and it made my initials A.Z. - I liked that. It sounded great, it looked great in my logo, and all of my artwork was signed with it. So why did I change it when I got married? For one simple reason: my maiden name associated me with my father, and, in my family, that is not something to be proud of. So, as seriously cool as I thought my last name looked/sounded, I was ready to get rid of that association. Unfortunately, my husband's last name is incredibly ugly (just being honest!), and it is ALWAYS mispronounced. It wasn't a good trade in that sense, but now there are no more "Z" people in my family (I was the last one left). I still sign my artwork with my maiden name for now, but I am seriously considering changing that practice.

In all honesty, the hardest part was being torn about losing my "identity" even though it was associated with my biological father. I'm a pretty independent, feminist type, and it seemed incredibly old-fashioned to take a husband's name. I don't like that my current name is not the one on my college diplomas and other certifications. On the other hand, it created a sense of unity when I did change it.

Also, it is wierd to sign one name your whole life, then, all of a sudden, start signing your name differently. Maybe it's just me, but I've messed it up a few times

The real hardest part? The act of changing it! Starting with social security to the DMV to the IRS to the phone companies, TV service, every credit card, insurance company, retirement accounts, all bank accounts, student loan company, work... seriously, it's so much easier just to stick with what you were born with.

 

[D'Snowth]

I was always under the impression that hyphenated were for those who were born to parents out of wedlock.

 

[bazooka_beak]

^ When I was growing up in the 80s, hyphenated names were pretty common. So I wouldn't say it's for "unmarried" people

 

[D'Snowth]

Well again, I just simply under that impression that they were.

 

[Fragglemuppet]

Well, I guess that could work too. I just figured in that case, it would be most common to use the mother's maiden name. In the end though, it's up to the "kids". When they come of age, they can always change their name to whatever they like I suppose.

 

[MrsPepper]

I know some ladies keep their name because they've already started their professional career under that name (like, if they are artists and having a name is important). Otherwise I think it's personal choice. It would depend on the name of my husband-to-be!