Oh mercy me, I can't help myself any longer...

[dwmckim]

And speaking of the Chef's hands, why don't they use real hands for the poser like they do the performance Muppet? Do you suppose they modeled the posers hands after Frank's?

Since Frank's retired from being the Chef's hands, what color is his hands now?

Since Frank retired from Muppeteering, who got his hand-me-downs?

When Frank stopped performing the Chef's hands, did he take all the Chef's recipes with him?

What would have happened if the Chef's hands' new performer would have been unavailable when the Chef was on America's Got Talent?

Was the person who currently plays the Chef's hands part of the wall of the Helping Hands in Labyrinth? If so, do you think the Chef would make a cameo appearance in a Labyrinth sequel?

Was Frank on set of Muppet Treasure Island when they did the Chef's scenes? If not, what would the Chef had done when someone announced "All hands on deck!"?

Did the same person play the Chef's hands in the Connie Stevens episode of the Muppet Show, the Muppets Go Hollywood, and AFV when the Chef served Swedish meatballs? If not, did the new performer have to take tennis lessons? Did they wear tennis shoes each time?

Since Frank retired from playing the Chef's hands, did the guy who claimed he was the inspiration for the Swedish Chef get reconstructive surgery done on his hands?

Do you think Frank stopped performing the Chef's hands because he got as sick as the rest of us of that ubiquitous photo of the Chef kissing his fingers?

#ho would perform the Chef's hands if he prepared ladyfingers?

When rod-hand Mokey is used in place of live-hand Mokey, what does the puppeteer who would usually play her right hand do?

And on subjects different from hands...

If a Muppet tree falls off its hook in the workshop after everyone's gone home, does it make a sound?

If the Electric Mayhem had the screenplay for The Muppet Movie that whole time, why didn't they come to the rescue earlier when Kermit and Piggy were abducted by Doc Hopper?

When a puppeteer loops their character's lines later due to not being able to be on set during the original taping, do they end up feeling loopy?

Does Elmo have a favorite brand of hot dog bun?

Why wasn't Lou in any of the animated Fraggle Rock episodes?

Why isn't Catgut around anymore?

Is there any behind the scenes footage of the first season Muppet Show discussion panel sketches?

If Boom! Comics are doing Farscape and Muppet Show comics, why aren't they doing any Animal Jam comic books?

Was Helen Reddy for Les, Lee, and Warren?

Do the Muppet builders count their chickens before they're stitched?

Why doesn't Frank wear a toupee? Why didn't Richard ever give in to Muppeteer peer pressure and grow a beard or moustache? Or Louise Gold for that matter?

Has Clive Cahuenga ever appeared as a full-bodied Muppet?

Since we haven't seen Herbert Birdsfoot in a long time, do you think he now has crow's feet?

 

[Gelfling Girl]

If a Muppet tree falls off its hook in the workshop after everyone's gone home, does it make a sound?

Someone will definitely hear it because of all us Muppet fans stalking around the workshop.

Why doesn't Frank wear a toupee? Why didn't Richard ever give in to Muppeteer peer pressure and grow a beard or moustache? Or Louise Gold for that matter?

LOL, Louise Gold with a beard/mustache. Very Muppety, indeed.

 

[Pork]

Where are my glasses? Like, seriously, I really want to know.

 

[terrimonster]

Wouldn't it be easier to PM or ban Muppet Frog rather than embarrass him into never coming back?

 

[dwmckim]

First of all, a ban is totally inappropriate. That's a moderator tool that should only be used in the most extreme circumstances such as spamming, flaming/trolling, or habitual maliciousness. It should never be exercised for those who are legitimately wanting and trying to be a part of and contributing to the forum and fan community. If that were to happen, i would be seriously concerned about the abuse of power and questionable judgement of the moderators (who already tend to display a heavier hand in various forum tools than they really should be doing)

Second, did anyone ever mention his (or anyone else's) name in this thread? It's more a satirical look at a situation/type of post that's become frequent as of late and bears some poking lighthearted fun at more than a specific person as there could certainly be a few people it could apply to. Of course if a particular person saw something that seemed a little familiar to their style, they might see some of the absurdity their posts may at times seem to border on. Think of it as a Richard Hunt-style ribbing.

But we're really getting too serious here. Back to the important stuff that truly matter like why doesn't Farley ever appear on packages of cotton balls?

 

[terrimonster]

I didn't intend to seriously suggest a ban. Many (very many) of the posts in this thread clearly imply jabs at that particular user. It looks like something that can quickly get out of hand and insulting. Since it isn't something worthy of a ban, it seems that a PM somewhere along the lines of

"It's great to see your enthusiasm about Muppet projects, but since you have so many questions of a technical, somewhat trivial, nature, maybe this forum isn't the best place to get answers to all of them."

would handle the situation better. I've been reading this forum for about 7 years, but only started posting recently. If my posts had been treated this way I'd feel very unwelcome.

It just seems to be getting over-the-top and overly specific.

 

[dwmckim]

Actually, this IS one of the best places to ask such questions...if you're not going to get the information here, where else might in come from? Some questions though, are probably only going to be answered by someone who has intimate insider knowledge and will most likely go unanswered.

I would not discourage any user from asking questions nor want them to feel unwelcome - as they say so often on Sesame Street, asking questions is a good way to find out things. And indeed what may get overlooked is that for every seemingly random where-did-THAT-come-from question that gets thrown out that probably either doesn't have an answer or couldn't be answered, there are just as many valid questions thrown out that members are happy to help out with.

But as the old adage goes, "ask a silly question and expect a silly answer"...so this thread is more along the lines of those silly answers! It's not meant to alienate any specific person - just to maybe allow some people to view something a tad absurd from a different angle. MC forums is a family of sorts and sometimes families engage in some lighthearted fun (again, think of it as a "Richard Hunt" style ribbing - a way of saying "you're part of the crowd...which means you're not immune to some ridicule when things get ridiculous") Again, it's more meant to address a situation more than a person - but if any one person does feel bad as a result, they have my full apology. Anyone coming here genuinely seeking to expand their Muppet knowledge is more than welcome and embraced by all - and i'm sure many of us have asked our share of silly questions over the years. You're more than welcome and a part of the family! But if your main contribution tends to be asking bizarre stuff that really can't be answered, you're probably going to find a fair amount of silliness and muffining in place of that answer.

Finally, it should be mentioned that since this thread is more poking fun at a situation more than a person, i can say that many of us have been guilty of the same thing. Wanting to know everything and anything about the Muppets and in many ways this is an exploration of Muppet fandom obsession in general - we're poking fun at ourselves just as much as anyone else. The hardcore Muppet fans probably are seen by non-Muppet fan friends and family in much the same way: "Why/how do you even know all this stuff?" And if it wasn't for the truly curious type of fan that wanted to know everything and anything no matter how bizarre or trivial or obscure we would not have the resources and answers to stuff that probably would have been inconceivable of knowing ten years ago like Muppet Wiki or the contents of the majority of every Sesame Street episode. Would we have such great returns of smaller characters like Dr. Strangepork in Bohemian Rhapsody or Lips playing with the Electric Mayhem for the first time in over a decade and a half if no one was asking whatever happened to them? If anyone feels excluded, in addition to my apology, i would extend my hand and say "It's okay. I'm a Muppet Freak too and i've been there. You're one of us and that's cool even if we do drive each other a little crazy from time to time. Why not join in the fun here with your own list of silly questions to show that you 'get it' and no offense taken?"

 

[terrimonster]

Fair enough. As long as it's all in good fun, it's actually been pretty funny.

 

[dwmckim]

...we now return to our regularly scheduled silliness...

If Big Bird is called "Big Bird" and "Little Bird" is called "Little Bird" why didn't they name Hoots "Medium Sized Bird"?

How many times has Cookie Monster been shown eating prepackaged cookies as opposed to freshly baked?

What do I do when I'm alone?

 

[D'Snowth]

Can I order this thread, keep it, and frame it?