Chapter 3
The hour was late in the afternoon when Mr. Grimness finally noticed the emptyness of the grand castle. Noone was coming down the hallway, not a soul was heard at the cafeteria, not even a peep was heard from outside near the doorway to the grim structure. This struck him as odd, since the castle was to open up to all the maddening crowds of tourists in time for the summer holiday season.
Mr. Grimness finally made his way upstairs to snatch a cookie, if any were to be left. "Hmmm, thought Cookie Monster would've eaten them all by now. But since there's noone here..." His thoughts trailed after downing a glass of milk and wiping and putting everything away. His first instinct was to check in with the Count, and this time it paid to visit the master of the castle.
Count: "Oh hello Edvard, sorry but the castle had to be closed up."
Grimness: "But why Count, what happened to make you change your mind?"
Count: "Come, you'd better see for yourself."
Though the Count knew of Mr. Grimness's lowered visual acuity, they understood each other when terms like this were used in their everyday talk.
Count: "All of my lovely marble numbers have disappeared. And vhat's vorse, I can't seem to find that goblin statue either."
He was talking about the gift Rizzo the Rat gave him last year at Christmas, when the lord of counting was staying at a friend's home for the festivities.
Grimness: "Hmmm, that's very strange, but..."
At that moment, their private conversation was interrupted by a lone wandering soul. Prairie Dawn had finally made it back to the surface world, bearing news as to where she had been.
PD: " I'm sorry to barge in like this on you guys, but I have a message for you Count."
The Count, at first dumbstruck that Prairie had even gotten into the closed confines of the castle, was even more surprised that she had a message for him.
Count: "Vell then Prairie, vhat do you have to tell us?"
Prairie took a moment to collect her thoughts and draw in a long deep breath.
PD: "Sorry, need a moment to get accustomed to the surface air again. When you didn't give us any information at the conference earlier this morning, I decided to do some searching of my own. After a morning of nothing, I wound up at an underground throne room. And then, this woman at least I think it was a woman, shows up and tells me to deliver a message to those living above her on the surface. She said that the numbers are now hers, along with the souls of the creatures tied to those numbers, for they do her bidding. She wants you to know that this castle was built upon her ancestral home and she will reclaim the land, unless you above are brave enough to descend into the depths of her darkness confronting her in mortal combat."
Mr. Grimness: "Prairie, did you happen to hear what her name was?"
PD: "Well... yes, when I asked meekly whose name I was to say sent it, she said that this proclamation came from... the Goblin Queen!"
Mr. Grimness: "Should've known it'd be her. This explains why we can't find that statue Count. She's taken it and been reborn in that statue's form. And now she's taken refuge in the caves below the castle. There's only one solution, I'll have to face her once again."
The Goblin Queen and Edward Grimness had met before, when they were both humans in their college years. She had been a diligent student of the arts, while he majored in literature. They met while attending a class on demonology and soon spent their afternoons and evenings studying together. But on one fateful All Hallow's Eve, she was infected by the sting of a spry mosquito while reading some longago spell in one of Edward's books. It happened that said book contained the history of goblins and their ancestral dwelling, deep within the cascms of the earth, in magical labyrinths where different creatures protected the royal family. Flashes of memories from years gone by passed before her eyes, as her true nature was revealed. She stood before the mirror of her apartment room transformed into the daughter of the Goblin King. Owing to the fact there hadn't been a goblin monarch in nary a hundred years since the old king was thwarted from obtaining human progeny, Rebecca took up the mantle of the Goblin Queen in a heartbeat. Yes, now she was a human woman of standard size and built, but with somewhat green-grayed skin instead of the flawless beige before. Her fiery red eyes remained, along with her darkened blood red hair, flowing in the night wind. Her nose was now a blackened snout, her ears fattened into pointy teardrop forms on the sides of her head, two of her teeth were now fangs visible on her lipstick-painted lips, and two dark gray horns protruded from the top of her head. The fingernails were replaced by smoky white claws, her fingers and toes intact in number, and her female chest and body reverted into somewhat of an hourglass form. The only other noticeable difference was the bulbous growth sticking out from her body, replacing her rear end. This was her goblin growth, and in spite of its unnatural origin, it accentuated the curves of her newly-crafted shape. She wore a sleeveless wine brown dress, a streaming blood red skirt held in place by a white crossbones buckle, black open-ended shoes, and a silven crown around her brow ringed by glittering jewels. She knew now that she was destined for more than a mere human's existence.
Edward and Rebecca stopped crossing each other paths a long time ago, at least it seemed that way to him after receiving her letter. He learned of her departure when his pet bat brought forth a letter that cold rainy Halloween night. They were to meet at their favorite pizza place and split their usual, a garlic Tombstone with the works. But when she failed to show, there was a slight chill in the wind. After reading her letter, he knew that their history had been rewritten. Edward rushed over to their secret meeting place and found her, waiting for a final good-bye. And in an instant, she was gone, swallowed up by the earth after being struck down by a single bolt of lightning on that unforgettable night.
Now it was clear to him, Rebecca had returned and stronger and madder than ever. Furious at being forgetten by the rest of the world, she vowed her goblin race would reclaim what was once theirs. And Edward knew that it had been her minions who stole the statue. Only by breaking it after encanting the spell would Rebecca return in all her former glory. It was the statue that gave her shape once again, the magic that brought her back enough sustennance to carry out her plans.
"It's time" was all Edward said to both his Muppet friends. The man who stood before them returned to his workshop and started shifting things in his suitcase. "Hoped I wouldn't need to don this costume again, but it can't be helped. The Count needs his home secured, and Rebecca won't be allowed to triumph."
First, he changed from his normal clothes into a light gray uniform, made of a strong pliable material. Next, came the armor pieces including the chestpiece covering his entire upper body. Two dark gray gauntlets quickly snapped over his wrists and hands, and his feet were secured inside two gray metallic boots. Then, he took a black low-brimmed hat and placed over his head. "Will need the eyepiece too" he muttered to himself, digging out what looked like a pair of bat ears attached to a dark gray oblong visor. This piece rested above the front brim of the hat, and when activated granted him full perfect sight. Last, but not least, came his weapon. This, he called his bat-blaster: a long dark gray tubular cannon ending in a similar grayish bat-topper, separated by a thin lighter gray band from its light gray nozzle. He emerged from the room, moving back to where he left the Count, but not before gathering a few more items.
Edward: "Count, not all your numbers were stolen."
Count: "Vhat? But all ten are gone."
Edward: "Yes, but remember that gift I brought you when I first moved in?"
The Count struggled for a moment, aided by the ovaled sculpture presented at that moment in Mr. Grimness's open hand.
Count: "Of course! They failed to get... the marble 0!"
Edward: "Yes, and I need it now to begin the mission I'll embark upon to get you the other numbers back."
Count: "Then by all means, take it. But be sure to protect it."
Edward: "It'll be as safe as I will."
With that, he opened the chestpice's crystal door and placed the marble 0 inside. At that moment, he locked the final addition to his armor in place. A black walking staff bearing a black battopper was firmly gripped in Edward's armlength gauntlet. "This, my Staff of the Underworld, will help in the coming battle."
The staff was his own walking stick, handy for any number of magical discharges.
The cannon was activated, displaying a glowing life meter divided into numerous bands of energy powering both the cannon's ammunition supply and Edward's life force.
Edward: "Count your numbers Count, they'll soon be back where they belong."
And with the push of a button on his utility belt, he disappeared, off on his new journey to recollect the Count's precious numbers and stop the Goblin Queen from completing her cruel plans.
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