Minor Muppetz' MT! outline: Weird Al Yankovic

[minor muppetz]

Enjoy this Muppets Tonight outline, taking place in the second season. I will be out of town for the next few days, so I won't be able to write any more outlines for awhile.

Cold Opening/ dressing room
Rizzo shows off his cheese sculpture of himself to weird al yankovic, gonzo, clifford, johnny fiama, and sal. they think the sculpting is good, but think it is weird to sculpt cheese. Rizzo wants Weird Al to write a song about the cheese, but Al is not sold on that idea.

Introduction
Clifford introduces Weird Al Yankovics first big hit, "My Bologna".

Opening Number: my bologna
The muppets Tonight band backs up weird Al yankovic as seymour, pepe, and the swedish chef keep delivering bologna on stage while gorgon heap, luncheon counter monster and behemoth keep eating bologna.

Dressing Room
Rizzo notices that his cheese sculpture has been eaten. Carl walks in, and rizzo smells cheese on his breath and instantly assumes that carl is the cukprit, although carl claims that he did't eat the cheese ("i was at a festival. I was one of the attractions: Carl The Big Mean Cheese Eater").

controll room
Nigel can't find his important documents.

Sketch
Kermit is a zamboni driver whose zamboni falls through the ice. Bobo is supposed to rescue kermit, but he falls into the ice as well.

Controll Room
Rizzo is still mad at carl for eating his cheese sculpture. carl gets so annoyed at Rizzo for accusing him of eating the cheese that he eats Rizzo.

(commercial break)

tales From The vet
Dr. Phil Van Neuter introduces the following sory, "tails from the vet". In this story, weird al yankovic plays a vet who pets disembodied (but stil animate) animal tails.

carnival
watching a carnival tv, statler can't believe that dr. phil van neuter would allow weird al to do a parody of his own show.

Hallway
Clifford is mad at Carl for eating rizzo, and at rizzo for accusing carl of doing something that he claimed he didn't do.

inside carls stomache
We see the inside of carls stomache. Rizzo notices that there is a lot of cheese in there, and starts eating. he doesn't see the sculpture, though, but he does find two talking cheeses.

commercial
Beauregard is a door repair man. if he can't repair your door in 15 days, he pays for everything.

commissionary
Carl goes into the commissionary, where he learns that weird al yankovic is the one who ate rizzos cheese. weird al apologizes to both carl and rizzo (who is still inside carl).

Closing number: Dare To Be Stupid
weird al yankovic sings as andy, randy, bobo, seymour, gonzo, lew zeland, link hogthrob, david hogsohog, spamela hamderson, beauregard, and mr. podlepants do numerous stupid things.

carnival
statler: would you dare yourself to be stupid?
waldorf: I already did. I dared myself to watch this show.

Good Night
Rizzo is now out of carls stomache, but weird al accuses carl of eating his balogna.

 

[minor muppetz]

performers

in case you are wondering who is supposed to perform who:
the cheeses are supposed to be performed by Leslie Carrarra (sounding like spamela hamderson) and kevin Clash (sounding like leon).
Gorgon heap is supposed to be performed by kevin clash, Luncheon Counter Monster is supposed to be performed by Jerry nelson, and Behemoth is supposed to be performed by brian henson.

 

[MartyMuppets]

Excellent Minor Muppetz.
If you ever try to expand it to a full script I can easily imagine Big Mean Carl saying after swallowing Rizzo in his rage "There! Now see for yourself whether or not I've eaten your stinking cheese you dirty rat!"
It's a shame Muppets Tonight didn't take off in the same way as its predecessor because I think there would have been a good chance we could have seen some sort of real Weird Al episode. I can imagine him applying for an episode with eager enthusiasm

 

[minor muppetz]

Okay, I will write scripts for the backstage scenes.

Here is a script for the cold opening:

(Clifford, Gonzo, Johnny Fiama, and Sal are in Weird Al Yankovic's dressing room)

Clifford: Hi, Al.
Weird Al: Hi, Clifford. Hi, everybody.
Gonzo: Hi, Weird.
Weird Al: Don't call me "Weird". "Weird Al" or even just plain "Al" would be fine.
Gonzo: But you are weird.
Weird Al: Yeah, but you are weirder.
Gonzo: Gee... what a compliment.
Johnny Fiama: Al, I'd just like ya to know that you have my permission to write a parody of any of my songs.
Weird Al: Thanks, Johnny, but aren't all of your songs covers anyway?
Sal: (shouting) ARE YOU ACCUSING JOHNNY FIAMA OF NOT BEING CAPABLE OF WRITING HIS OWN SONGS?!
Weird Al: Uh, yes.
Sal: I don't believe....
Rizzo: (walking in) Hey, everybody. Look at this cheese sculpture I made of myself.
Gonzo: hey, that's nice.
Sal: Yeah, it makes me hungry.
Johnny Fiama: That's a perfectly good sculpture, though I don't know why you'd waste good cheese on a sculpture.
Clifford: yeah, that is a bit weird.
Weird Al: Well, izzo, it looks like you've got artistic talent.
Rizzo: Thank you, Al. Oh, and by the way, since you've written so many great food songs, will you write a song about my cheese sculpture?
Weird Al: No.. I'm not that weird, you know.
(Rizzo starts to look rejected)
Gonzo: If it makes you feel any better, Rizzo, I'll write a song about it.
Rizzo: Uh, that's okay. (to Weird Al) but, uh, if you're not going to write a song about my cheese, will you at least perform one of your concert-only songs?
Weird Al: No, I don't want there to be an edited video release of this show thanks to me singing a song that I couldn't get permission for in the first place.

 

[minor muppetz]

Here is my script for the scene of Rizzo findig that his sculpture is missing.

(Rizzo walks into Weird Al Yankovic's dressing room)

Rizzo: I can't beleive it. He writes a song about balogna but not my cheese, and he dosn't take requests for unreleased... (Notices that most of the cheese is eaten, with just a few crumbs left) Hey! This cheese has been eaten! Who ate the cheese?!
Carl: (walking in) Oh, hi, Rizzo.
Rizzo: (sniffs breath) Carl! Shame on you!
Carl: I'm sorry, I didn't know you didn't want me to say hi...
Rizzo: Aw, cut off the innocent act, Carl, you ate my cheese, didn't you?
Carl: Um, no.
Rizzo: Don't lie, (sniffs mouth) I smell cheese on your breath.
Carl: I just got back from a festival. I was "Carl, The Big Mean Cheese Eater".
Rizzo: Oh, don't be such a liar. (walks out of room)
Carl: But, but Rizzo, I didn't do it.. Rizzo!... (follows Rizzo)

 

[MartyMuppets]

I love the cold opening script Minor Muppetz. The dialogue between Al and the Muppets is so perfect. Al's final line made me laugh.
I can't wait to hear how the continuation of the confrontation between Rizzo and Carl is played out

 

[minor muppetz]

And now, the script for Nigel losing his important documents:

Nigel: Okay, everybody, get Kermit ready for the next sketch. (starts looking through some papers) Now, I need to find my important documents. (to Eugene) If I don't get them mailed by tomorrow, then I'll have to wait sixty extra years before I can retire. (searches) but.. but I can't find them. (impatiently) WHERE ARE MY IMPORTANT DOCUMENTS!!!! Oh, I'll never retire when I want to.... (sees carl walking in the controll room) Carl! Carl!
Carl: What?
Nigel: You ate my important documents, didn't you!?
Carl: No.
Rizzo: Oh, I'm sure he did. He ate my cheese.
Carl: I did not eat your cheese, and I did not eat the directors documents.
Nigel: Why not? It's rich food.
(eugene taps Nigel on the shoulder)
Nigel: What?
(Eugene points down)
Nigel: (looks down) Oh, I've been sitting on these documents all along.

 

[minor muppetz]

And now, here's more script:

Rizzo: (complaining) I spent hours sculpting that cheese, and then you go and eat it! You're selfish!
Carl: (annoyed) I did not eat your cheese, ya dirty rat!
Rizzo: Oh, yeah, right, I can smell it on your breat....
Carl: I already told you, that's different cheese.
Rizzo: Yeah, tell that to the judge.
Clifford: Come on, guys, stop fighting.
Zippety Zap: Yeah, save your fighting for next week, when we do a wrestling show.
Rizzo: Well, as long as he ate my cheese....
carl: Allright, that does it! (Carl puts Rizzo into his mouth) There! Now look and see if I ate your dirty cheese, ya dirty rat!
Rizzo: All right, I will.... hmm, this cheese looks delicious.
(we hear Rizzo eating some of the cheese inside Carl's stomache)
Bill the Bubble Guy: Uh, is he eating after you, carl?

 

[MartyMuppets]

Minor Muppetz. This is terrific stuff
I think you have a natural gift for writing script type fiction. I can see it all happening with the characters clearly in my mind. Keep it up.

Incidentally I'm interested in trying some outline fiction myself. I have a thread here about an Idea I had for a Wayne and Wanda sketch that Gorgon has recently commented upon for me and I've asked him to talk to me about outline writing some other time. If you would like to look at the thread when you can mate I'm eager for advice and encouragement from anyone who is willing to discuss with me.

 

[minor muppetz]

And now... here is the next scene:

(Clifford is walking down the halway with Carl)
Clifford: Carl! I'm very made at you for eating Rizzo!
Rizzo: (from inside Carl) yeah, Carl's in touble and Clifford's on my side.
Clifford: (sticking face into Carl's mouth) And Rizzo, I'm mad at you for accusing Carl of doing something that you have no proof that he did.
Carl: Yeah! You're in trouble too, heh heh heh.
Rizzo: What do you mean no proof? I smelled cheese o his breath.
Clifford: That cheese could have came from anywhere.
Carl: It did come from anywhere.
Rizzo: The proper grammer is "somewhere".
Clifford: As long as your in his stomache, why don't you go see if you can find the cheese sculpture?
Rizzo: All right, I will!
(cut to inside Carl's stomache)
Rizzo: Let's see.... (rizzo searches... there is a lot of melted scheese) I'm sure that that carl ate some lights so that I can see better.
carl: (voice-over) Thank you! it was part of my light snack before the festival.
Rizzo: (starts eating some cheese) hey, this scheese is delicious, but it's clearly not my sculpture, as all of this cheese tastes like blue cheese. Hmm, maybe Carl was telling the truth.
(two talking cheeses show up)
Cheese #1: Eww, gross!
Cheese #2: I'll say... that monster ate cheese and now the rat who he ate is eating after that monster.
Cheese #1: Disqusting!