series three reviews
Okay, it's 1.25am on Saturday morning here, and I just got home and I'm drunk, so I'm inspired (rightly or wrongly) to review these things, so excuse my potential poor typing skills and/or potential lack of social graces.
I'm going to rip off mike Crawford's reviewing criteria, because, well...let's be honest. what's he going to do about it? Cry into his pillow tonight? i'd like to see that (no really I would. I get off on that stuff). Ha ha. not really. i'm kidding. see? it was a harmless joke to break the ice. well now we're already on a rapid downward spiral i gues sit can only go up from here.
anyway, my only deviation from the evnerable Mr Crawford's style is i'm not going to give those crazy star ratings. i don't have to. we all should know by know that this is a solid four star (out of four. if Mike wasn't so stingy with the stars he'd allocate a full five and then this would be a five, but hey- email your star rating complaints to him).
ANYHOO this is a four (five) star line and series three is no exception. in fact things just keep on getting better. no other line excites me like this one and bear in mind that in the eighties i had those sectaur guy thingies that rode on GIANT HAIRY SPIDER HAND PUPPETS!!! so it's a big call on my part. because giant hairy spider puppets are cool. (but not four stars)
I'll get on with it shall I...
PACKAGING
Same as before (almost) but that's not a bad thing. i really like the 25th anniversary packaging and prefer it to the proposed series 4 stuff (although the united line makes perfect sense and i'm sure it will grow on me. like a flower, not a fungus). The inclusion of the upcoming series information is noticed and appreciated. and exciting. and makes the ladies squeal. my only criticism here is that i don't think the character bios were as funny as they were in series two. And Rowlf's blister is HUGE! i haven't had a blister that big since my girlfriend went away for a month and i discovered sensibleerection.com. And the packaging is pretty, Ken. And i don't mean that in a weird kind of way.
SCULPTING
I have absolutely no complaints about any of the likenesses. the details and the textures (fur, jeans etc) are all spot on. The choice of materials is also excellent with softer rubber used to make jackets and collars etc. It annoys the heck (auto censor is sensitive- "heck" wouldn't have been my first choice) when people say, "hmm...i don't know ken, maybe i'm wrong but from my hazy memory scooter's eyes should be a little smaller". here's the equation for you:
Your hazy memory of the seventies DOES NOT EQUAL the hours spent by a professional artist who has Henson supplied reference material in front of them. i'm not saying they'll always get it 100% right but i know which one will get my money EVERY SINGLE TIME.
The sculpts are BRILLIANT. these are the best looking figures out there BAR NONE> come on. even try to name something better. MAsters of the Universe? i don't think so. look at Skeletor, he's been in production for how long and MAttel couldn't even be bothered sculpting him a face. i'm not kidding, check that thing out next time. you can see his skull.
PAINT
The paint ops on mine are flawless. I've had the odd splash on figures in previous series (not that the factory can be blamed for what i do in my spare time) (another joke. grante dit wa sill concieved) (ahem...let's move on) but these figures are perfect. and VIBRANT. they'll stand out on your shelf. or sit if you bend their legs.
ARTICULATION
Great again, but not without problems. wrists and feet swivel fine (got that one ironed out) but my Scooter's right elbow and my Zoot's left elbow are practically glued straight. neither will budge and i'm not prepared to break them to prove a point. doesn't worry me but might worry some. because i've seen you whine and you'll put up a thread about this stuff and Ken will be sad and his lovely new wife will leave him. so don't do it. they are still best figures bar none, and i have to admit that after 26 years of bending my own left and right elbows it's OVER-RATED.
ACCESSORIES
Every single accessory is beautifully sculpted and you get LITERALLY TEN GAZILLION OF THEM. you'll experience great joy freeing each one from it's packaging, especially the piano that will take you half an hour to build. it's so huge i took it to a bar tonight and played it while a grown woman reclined on it. that's how real it is. you have no idea just looking at it in the package and if you should even THINK about leaving it in there then i hope the devil eats all your children. TAKE IT OUT AND PLAY WITH IT. if you're looking for an investment go on the stockmarket (warning: that will end in tears and you'll probably end up throwing yourself out of a building). Although my one accessory criticism is that Scooter has trouble holding the larger stuff as his hands are both sturdy and narrow. the cup tray eludes him. once again- doesn't worry me but someone will have a cry about it.
VALUE
Wonderful again. now bear in mind that the australian dollar sucks and these things cost me $25AUS a pop. but I have no regrets. i will continue to buy them as long as they put them out, as no other toy line makes me as happy. (actually i didn't even pay for them, i put them on my girlfriend's credit card so i'm just talking tough, but i'm sure i paid for some of them somewhere along the line. if if i didn't i would if provoked.
Well...i hope that was helpful. i'm sure it wasn't but, hey. it didn't cost you anything to read. and in two-three weeks when these hit America you'll all be reviewing them and my ramblings will be lost in the Internet ether.
Thank you for your strong constitution.