Hiding depression and trying to deal with it yourself, by yourself, never works with anybody. Seeking help, and being HUMBLE enough to seek help, is a step in the right direction.
I hope you can realize what dwayne1115 and others including myself have been trying to gently impress upon you for a long time. When all else fails, turn to God. Not frog, blog, glob, or any other monosyllabic
Unglided-o substitutes. Placing faith in humanity? How's that working out for you? Placing faith in leaders/celebrities/ even family or friends who don't have your best interests at heart will only lead to
disappointment. Placing faith in those that can't help you, WON'T help you.
I've said more than enough. I really wish you the best, not just here, but in all areas of your life, and in the rest of your time on this earthly plane. I want you to have the same measure of peace I've been able to find. And you'll never find it putting faith in toys, sitcoms, movies, politicians, or people or leaders that really don't want to know you, don't want to hear from you, don't really give a rat's butt about you or your circumstances.
I've said enough. Some might say I 've said too much.
I agree with you on one thing: Life is too long AND too short, to put your faith in the wrong things.
Now I have said enough. Finally.