So, two months ago, I ended up cutting ties with my friend Jeff, who I know i’ve mentioned on this forum a few times, and was someone I was close with and knew for nearly ten years. What happened was, ever since his cousin Brian committed suicide a year ago, combined with all his ridiculous health problems, he was becoming angrier and angrier as the months went on, literally to the point he was becoming a ticking time bomb. Every time I would go to his house since then, he would always end up getting into some kind of argument with his folks. It got to the point I just didn’t even feel comfortable being around the guy anymore. (I mean, for goodness sake, he threw a ******* CHAIR across the room once after I heard a nasty argument going on upstairs one day after we were at TGI Friday’s. I ended up going home afterwards).
Not only that, but another thing was bothering me was his stupid homophobic and transphobic views, and it eventually got to the point I noticed he was racist and sexist. Like, yeah, i’ve got a dark sense of humor myself and i’ll make bad jokes against any race or sex out of dark humor around my friends with the same level, but him on the other hand? He was actually being himself when he said some of this nasty ****. What finally broke the camel’s back for me was when he left a really nasty message in a group chat I was part of with on Facebook with two other close friends of his (I ended up cutting ties with them as well), saying that he saw “a huge group of stupid filthy Asian ***holes with tons of disgusting little kids, all speaking their own language.” And then “as he got in his car, he looked at their ugly faces, raised his voice and said ‘OH, I’M SORRY..... I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA!!!!!!’ And then drove away calling them a bunch of ‘******* chinks.’ “ after seeing that awful message, my jaw just completely dropped and that was when I ended all ties.
But as to be expected, as the days went on afterwards, I was having a lot of thoughts of the good memories that are now just pieces of dust flowing in my head, and it got to the point I was having a lot of regrets which led to the point of me wanting to drive down to his house and put him out of his misery. And I’m not someone who would actually go out of my way to do that. So I ended up taking a break to get those nasty thoughts out of my head, and when I was on my break, I didn’t even realize how awful I was actually feeling.